Hey! I'm MitchyChick and I have been at my goal weight for nine months!
I love it! I was thinnish growing up but when I got older I did like all the other women in my family and put on a bunch of weight. I spent YEARS putting off losing weight for a million reasons but once I decided to do it I went to my doctor and I went to my therapist. For me, it was as much about getting my mind right as it was about figuring out what kind of calorie intake and exercise routine I needed. I made my goal ten pounds a month and lost 120 pounds in a year.
I've gained back... Eight pounds, since I started working with a personal trainer to build muscle.
I'm trying hard to remember that it is okay. I am definitely keeping a closer eye on what I eat and making myself do cardio and weight training now. I still fit in my clothes so I assume it is all muscle and I don't need to freak. Actually, I fit in my clothes better! LOL
I am trying to build muscle because I have that loose flabby thing happening and it is miserable! I figure arms, legs, abs, muscle will help. But then there are my poor breasts! :-( I started out at a size 40DD. Now I am a 32DD but I don't know how, they don't look like DD to me! I really don't want or have money for a breast lift. I have decided to have an augmentation. My BFF and I joke about me having stripper boobs but I am really worried that will be the case. She is not so understanding and assures me that of course I will have stripper boobs and of course men will approach me more. That makes me a little queasy and feel a little like crying. I'm already blonde, do I really want giant boobs too? Well... I don't want hanging breasts.
I've been looked down on and called names my whole life, just because... I don't even know why, I've been told it's "the blonde thing" and the person who told me that was a diversity expert so I kind of tend to believe her. That entire dynamic was a HUGE part of what I had to see my therapist about so that I could lose weight. I was super worried about going back to how things were before I gained weight. Sometimes I am tempted to gain it back but I remind myself that I know I am a good and valuable person independent of how I look and I have yet to give in to the temptation. Adding
bigger breasts into the mix scares me. But do I have to have floppy hanging breasts just because other people want to be jerks? How is that even fair? I don't want to buy into that. I don't want to have an augmentation for
more attention. But I know that is what will happen. But I want the augmentation so that I don't have to go through a breast lift, which I really don't want, and my breasts won't be so deflated. Why is it perfectly okay if I have A cups to go to a C or even a D but since I have DD already I feel like I've got to sell my dignity to do what I want to do with my body? I am supposed to make my final payment and be locked into this on Tuesday. I want to, but I'm afraid of what I am going to have to deal with.
At one point I was thinking about a tummy tuck but I really didn't want to do that. I just can't stand the idea of cutting out chunks of skin and sewing things back up. It sounds horrible. I keep saying that I'm not a quilt or a jacket so I don't need to be put through all that sewing. For me, there isn't enough benefit to the procedures to go through them. Then I saw all these pictures of ladies who hadn't lost weight but had given birth, their tummies look just like mine! So I'm glad that I was insistent that I didn't want to do that.
Advice on the breast augmentation would be lovely! And please don't start calling me names or something. It's hard to admit how I feel about this. Maybe somebody here has even been through this same debate with themselves and ended up getting the augmentation. That would be lovely!