hi everyone! i just joined today and am hoping this will be a place that i can come to for support and motivation.

i have struggled with my weight for most of my adult life. i gained a lot of weight when i was pregnant with my son back in 1995 and i never lost that weight. i was 265 at my very highest. in 2006, i didn't have a vehicle which forced me to walk to and from work daily... it was a 45 minute walk... a total of 90 minutes a day. as a result, i dropped about 70 lbs and a few dress sizes. in 2008, i moved in with my boyfriend and changed careers... walking to work is no longer an option. i ended up gaining all of that weight back and ended up being right back to 265 lbs.

for a little over a year now, i have been working out and watching what i eat... i've lost 25 lbs. back around the holidays, i began to slack off and ended up going a couple of months with no workouts at all. i decided then that i needed to workout daily because if i take even one day off, i have a tough time getting back into the groove. the thing is, i haven't stuck to that and i have had such a hard time staying on task.

back in march, i had another setback that has put me at an all-time low, emotionally. i discovered that my boyfriend of 5 1/2 years was having an online affair with one of his old high school girlfriends. my world came crashing down and made me lose any self confidence that i had gained since my divorce. things are actually much better between us now, but i still struggle daily with the self esteem issue.

before this had happened, i had a goal set to get under 200 lbs before august 9th when my boyfriends daughter gets married. i have to appear in pictures and i am very self conscious about how i'll look when looking back at those pictures. at any rate, the setback i had put a halt to that goal being attainable.

i have decided at this point to just work my tail off until august and just be happy with whatever results i have. the new goal i set for myself is to lose 40 lbs before my 40th birthday on october 30th. i know that i can do this if i can just get myself motivated! any help you all can offer will be greatly appreciated!!

Welcome Jmh -- a fellow Scorpio, I think, right? My birthday is also the end of October (I'll be 47) -- yay for us!

It's great that you KNOW you can lose the weight, you've taken off 70lbs before with walking -- you know it can be done!

My advice to you is to jump right in and start posting often. Don't hang back. This is a great community, lots of giving and getting of support available to all!

thank you, mrs snark... yes, i'm a scorpio! thank you for the encouragement! i'm trying very hard to stay focused. the worst days are my days off... i usually end up slacking off and once i slack off one day, i have a hard time getting back into it. i had the last 3 days off... and i promised myself i would still get up and workout... didn't happen! i did spend the entire afternoon weeding flower gardens and mowing the lawn yesterday... that actually helps me get back into the swing of things.