Hello! I'm new at this. Don't really know what I'm doing. All I do know is that I'm 60 to 70 lbs over weight and tired, depressed, and I want to kill myself. I don't know where to start or what to do.

It sounds like your self-esteem is down for the count. If you truly are contemplating suicide, please seek professional help.

What I've found is that I had to work on my thought process before I could even begin to successfully lose weight. My confidence was at rock bottom, I hated the way I fit into my clothes, and I didn't think I deserved to feel pretty at my current weight. Once I got my frame of mind in check, I discovered that I had the strength to change my behaviors and work towards healthy weight loss.

I'm glad you found this website, because there are subgroups that deal with depression and weight loss. I would suggest checking out those groups and solidifying support.

My first piece of advice though comes from the part of your post where you state that you want to kill yourself. For your immediate safety, please seek professional help - call a friend, a crisis line, even 911 if you are in danger of hurting yourself.

Best of luck.

I agree with Coffeeshopgirl, please talk to someone (((hugs))).
As for where to start, have you spoken with you Doctor? He/she will be able to point you in the right direction.
At the end of the day, you have to want to do it for yourself.
I am following a low calorie eating plan & am trying to stick to clean eating with some walking thrown in.
I really hope things look up for you soon & there are plenty of people here who would love to help you

((((hugs)))) We've all been down in the dumps about how we look and feel about ourselves at some point! But most of the people here have figured out how to feel good about themselves even before they lose their weight. You can do it too! If you think you are depressed, dealing with that will go a long ways towards helping your weight loss goals - and the great news is, that good diet and excercise helps mood a ton. I hope you talk to your doctor about depression and suicidal thinking, and I hope you know that suicide is never a real solution - it just passes on your pain to someone else. But in the meantime, Welcome! And I hope you find the support that you are looking for here as you begin your weight loss journey.

Hugs

Hey girl. Please know that your self worth isn't measured in pounds.
And you may not know what to do but actually I think this site is a great start! I know it's helped me with some of my starting questions already by just looking through a few threads. Please don't take your life, you can get through anything that holds you back! Google suicide hotlines to find a hotline in your state please. They'll help you with finding further help.

Crisis Intervention of Houston is a great resource nearby. 713-HOTLINE. Do you have a general practitioner you go to for routine check ups? Don't be afraid to tell them about your depression, they see it all the time. And check back in with us, this site is full of great people with wisdom and kindness to share. You may feel so far removed from people right now, but you truly are not alone. Just one connection is all you need. Don't isolate. Way to reach out through this forum!! That's admirable.

Good morning! I believe that most people who think they want to kill themselves really just want the pain to end. You might be surprised at how much you can emotionally heal from the point you are at now. I am speaking from experience. So do whatever you need to do to heal--and I would agree with the first responder on this thread--that you should contact a counselor or pastor who can guide you to a safer, healthier frame of mind.

thanks everyone. I just want to be myself again. Happy and outgoing. but I don't know where to start and I'm having trouble finding the motivation. I don't have close friends to call up and talk about it. I found this website googling fat and depressed. and started reading some threads. I hope I can find what I need in other peoples stories. I just don't know what to do anymore. Every day I wake up I just think great another day of the same problems.

OMG, fatanddepressed0319, do you have another nickname? I don't wanna call you that and you look LOVELY in your pic!! I'm gonna call you Texas for now

I know exactly what you're going through.... It's so hard going from the person we used to be to realizing the person we've become. I don't even know how I slipped this bad or how I could've let it go on this long. I think up until this year a part of me was always in denial. I mean, I knew I had gotten fat, but in my head I still kept telling myself it wasn't that bad. When I realized that, yes, it is that bad, I really hit a low. I'm trying now to lose this weight once and for all and I've been hitting some speedbumps the past month, but the ladies here have really helped to keep me going. I hope you participate as much as possible in these threads and are able to soak up some of the good vibes we'll be sending you! Good luck!!

wow. Lakilaulea i just read your blog. and i feel the exact same way you described. I always would get the looks, and now everyone just looks away. I stopped wearing makeup to work and my hair is always in a pony tail. i wear the same jeans and shirts every week, with not the best looking sandals because i dont want to go and buy a bigger size. i hardly know how to use this site. is there a way to private message ppl?

Please don't put yourself down.

Ask yourself if you are depressed because you are over weight? or depressed and over weight? Either way don't hurt yourself.
Start drinking less soda, drinking more water, changing what you eat, and exercising. It won't be quick, but if you stick with it you'll see results <3 goodluck.

Good point Babybat! I was diagnosed w/ depression last year. I was convinced all my problems had to do w/ my weight.

Don't get me wrong, I definitely have weight-related issues, but I had to realize losing weight wouldn't fix all of my problems. Through therapy I found out what was really bothering and took steps toward being a happier me.

I've been doing great since last summer, and Ive finally got on the weight loss wagon. I found that I hated myself b/c I was fat. Now, I love myself - and I want to lose weight b/c I love myself.

Sometimes it helps to "fake it til you make it." There was a point where I was pretty much wearing the same clothes everyday, I lived on the couch and/or in my bed, and only left the house for food. Some days just putting on make up (though you dont want to) doing your hair, and wearing a cute top can make you feel better even if youre having a bad day. Try it!

Remember, you don't have to be fat AND depressed. Maybe work on the cause of your depression, then tackle your weight loss journey slowly.

Btw, You can private message ppl by clicking on their screen name and going to their profile

If you click on someone's name, the drop down menu should have an option to private message. I just checked yours and you don't have one so perhaps there's a waiting period? I'm gonna add you to my buddylist; I'm not exactly sure what that does, but at least I'll be able to find you easily here and we can keep tabs on each other's progress! We're gonna do this together!!

After spending some time on here yesterday and looking at the Goal Album Pics, I found some inspiration in those photos. I cooked dinner last night and found that when I cook, I eat less. I guess just being in the kitchen on my feet for an hour or so I just lose the appetite. Let's see if I can keep this going.

I'd love to keep up with each others progress Lakilaulea! I find it amazing how so many other women are going through and feeling the exact same way as me. Good thing fat can be lost! Imagine if it stayed forever once you have it attached to you! Do you have any photos of yourself "before" the weight gain and "present" and we can compare ours!