I miss home
Today I cried… not that crying is out of norm, however today I cried like I haven't cried since I have lot someone close. A cry so deep and overwhelming you can hardly breath…
I struggle with my weight and body image every day, but that was not why I was crying today. I miss home. I am deployed… I am in the Army, this is my fourth deployment, this time it's not AF or Iraq, this time it's Qatar. It's not where I am that is getting to me, its who is not here with me, my fiancé, Billy.
Most people deploy and lose weight… it's like I can't stop eating. Billy is my fitness partner, it's easy to workout and eat together and when the urge to binge in the states comes along, I cuddle up to him.
I have a hard time believing I will ever achieve my goals if I can't stop this binge eating. Not to mention staying within military standard is extremely difficult for me.
I am tired of being away from home
I am tired of thinking I will never be happy with my body
and I just feel like I need too talk/interact with people...so here I am
On another note - I watched Miss Representation, a documentary on women and the media, I highly recommend it.
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