Hi, my name is Kori.

I'm 21 years old, 22 in May. I have been married to the love of my life for nearly 3 years. I am five foot, five inches tall, and pretty top heavy.

I have always struggled with my weight. The lowest I have been at was 165 in my senior year of high school, when I was part of JROTC and did a lot of physical activity and exercise.

Since I have been out of high school for the last 3 years, my weight has sky-rocketed to a horrible 280+. I have made a few attempts to lose weight, but they were always halfhearted and I gave up after one or two weeks of watching calories and doing exercise.

The culprit for me is a combination of video games (I play WoW like my life depends on it....not proud, but I want to be honest), soda, and horrible portion sizing.

I want to get serious and lose around 150 lbs. I also want to help my husband lose about the same amount.

One of my biggest concerns is losing weight too rapidly. Doctors have said that with the right exercise and caloric intake that I should lose quite a bit in the first few months, as long as I stick to it. I am worried about excess skin, mainly because I don't have the financial standing to have it surgically removed, and I think I would feel more self-conscious with the baggy skin than with my weight.

If anyone has any advice on motivation or anything I have mentioned, I would greatly appreciate it.

PS I'm also thinking about buying something in the size I want to be to encourage my weight loss, so that I can have something that I invested with. Like a pair of jeans or a bathing suit.

Welcome! I like the idea about buying something in the size you'd like to be.

Welcome!

I've done that - I bought a few items of clothing a couple of sizes smaller so that I have something to look forward to as I lose weight. At this stage I think buying something that would fit me at my goal weight is aiming too high. Our minds have a way of telling us that it's just too far away. But as I go down I'll continue to buy smaller sizes; I think that's a great idea.

It's great that you're aware of where most of your problems lie: too much inactivity, over-sized portions and soda. Start cutting back on all of those things, up your exercise a little, drink lots of water, and you should start seeing results within the week.

Good luck, and I hope to see you around the forums!

hi, korij!

first off, the concept that losing weight too fast will cause skin sagging is not quite accurate. genetics determines whether or not you'll have skin sag. do you have stretch marks? if so, you're more likely to have sag. if not, then your skin has great elasticity and sagging will be less. smoking and sun damage - two biggies that damage skin - will increase the odds of sag.

unless you plan on losing weight *very very* slowly - and i mean VERY slowly - it will take 2yrs or more for your skin to shrink as much as it will.

personally, i don't believe that losing weight actually reduces sagging - what i think happens is that the skin takes the same amount of time regardless, but losing slowly just means you shrink in tune to your skin, as it were.

i reason it thus: skin will shrink regardless - so lose weight slowly and just keep the appearance okay, or lose the weight quickly and wait for the skin to some down. either way

i'm 45 - i started with 100lbs to lose and i'm 15 down. already i can see lateral ripples on my thighs. that was one of the reasons i stopped losing weight before - why go to all this trouble if i'm going to end up looking like i'm made of half-melted wax?

but you know something? i'm not worried any more: i'd rather have loose skin than a coffin. being told i'm near the end of my life if i don't get the weight off asap really puts things into perspective.

i just wish i hadnt' left it so long - had i kept it up two years ago, it might have taken me all this time to lose the weight and maybe i'd look like crap in a bikini but i'd be healthy and i'd live long enough to see my youngest daughter graduate high school.


the clothing-for-motivation is a great idea - my bff uses that technique. she starts by buying three outfits in incrementally smaller sizes. she doesn't weigh herself - just once a month she tries on the largest item of clothing. as it fits, she takes it down and buys another outfit in a size smaller than the smallest (so she's always got three on the wall) until the smallest size is the one she wants to be. then she just keep adding until she has three outfits that are her goal size.

another tip: she throws out clothes as they get too big. she said keeping them "just in case" is pretty much like giving herself permission to fail. she loves shopping for clothes in smaller sizes but gets very depressed when she has to replace her wardrobe because she gained weight.

she's been yo-yoing pretty badly - she has fibromyalgia, lupus, and possibly MS and the doctors she's seeing can't seem to get their s* together - one tells her to lose as much weight as she can so she went down to 118 at five-seven (truly not a good look); the next specialist was horrified and told her to take her weight to 145 (looked good but it was hard for her, mobility-wise, to deal with the extra weight). and so on. she's decided to heck with them all and is going to settle her weight at 135, which is where she looks the best.

Wow, everyone seems so nice!!

@threenorns - Now I feel bad for saying I'm worried about the skin sag. I feel so vain, haha. But yes, it's true, I would rather be healthy than look good in a bikini as well.

Unfortunately, yes I have a lot of stretch marks. On my stomach more than anywhere else, but I also have them on my breasts, upper arms, and thighs. So I will probably have a degree of skin sag as I lose the weight. I did hear somewhere that if I drink more water, it will improve the elasticity of my skin, so as I cut out soda and drink more water, hopefully that will help lessen the skin sag somewhat.

I also plan to throw out clothes that get to big as I lose weight. I'm worried that it will give me an excuse to "regress" and gain weight again, though replacing a whole wardrobe would suck (Though I think I can probably repurpose t-shirts).

Currently, I'm at a 20 in jeans, and I already have an 18 that I can BARELY squeeze into, but they hurt to wear, so I'm taking that as a sign that they are too small.

Hope things go better for your friend! It sounds like she's having a tough time. :< In the long run, she should go with whatever makes her feel the best, though 135 sounds pretty good.

Welcome Kori!

You've come to the right place - there's loads of fab advice, help and encouragement here. Start by setting yourself small goals and the whole journey will feel much more acheivable.

Re the skin thing - I too have some skin sag going on and although it bugs me a bit, it's infinitely preferable to the way I felt (and looked) at my heaviest. you're still young and have a much better chance of it pinging back now than if you left it another 10+ years. Concentrate on getting fitter/healthier and worry about any potential skin issues if or when they happen.

Good luck