Hi there. My name is Missy and I'm 32 years old. I've been overweight since my mid-teens. I have attempted to lose weight a handful of times but I never put much into it. It's not that I'm lazy by any means ... I just was never motivated to do it. I get those spurts of motivation ... but there was never really any true depth to it til recently.
I am extremely family oriented. I am single, no kids ... but my family is everything to me. I will do anything for any of them. When I said I'm not lazy, I mean it physically as well. I am always out in the yard doing yardwork or cleaning ... I even go to other family members houses and cut their grass ( which I love to do ) and clean their house etc.
I recently lost an important person in my life suddenly. After the funeral it hit me hard that I even though I'm happy with my family life ... I'm not happy with myself. It all came down on me like a ton of bricks and my mind was out of control with thoughts about why I never did anything about my unhappiness with my weight. Instead of me controlling IT ... the WEIGHT controlled my life. I don't want the next 30 years to go by with me being unhappy with myself.
I've come to the realization that while I'll do anything for any of my family ... why haven't I done the same for myself? Why am I so motivated to do things for those I love ... but not myself?
Well I don't want to continue this path with neglecting my body ... or my heart for that matter. I want to take the reigns and start changing my life.
Question is ... I have no idea where to start. How do I know what diet to go on? There are so many! Do I do the low carb? Do I calorie count? Etc, etc.
What about exercise? Do I start by just walking every day?
Do I keep logs? Where do I go to do that? Do I just get a notebook?
I have no clue where to even start but I want to start ... I NEED to start taking control of my life.
ANY suggestions would be appreciated. Thank you in advance.
Where to start? Exercise - any exercise is a good start. Using a push mower instead of a riding one is a start! Using stairs instead of elevators is a start. Exercise doesn't have to be "going to the gym" it can be whatever gets you up and burning calories. So start with what you can handle and then add on more when you can.
Which diet? That's a tougher one. You kinda have to read up about them and then try what you think will work best. You can always change if it doesn't seem like a good fit. There re groups here for pretty much any diet you might consider.
Calorie counting is the most basic. There are sites online that give you the calories and let you record what you've eaten. myplate, sparkpeople, fitday are three common ones. They are each a little different but they all free and easy.
Weight Watchers is a simplified calorie counting system with local chapters. That can be useful if you need some local support for your weightloss.
Then there's a bunch of low carb diets where you don't limit your calories but you do limit the types of foods you eat. You can also count calories while eating low carb - the two are not mutually exclusive.
Whatever you do 3FC can be an incredible resource. There is so much collective wisdom and experience here it's amazing.
I am sorry for your loss As to where to start, figuring out a plan that fits you and your lifestyle is a great thing to do, in my opinion. I count calories and exercise. You can check out more on calorie counting and other eating plans at our Diet Central here - http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/#diet-central
I think your realization that you need to take care of yourself just as much (if not more) than you take care of your family is so spot on. You really can't be the "best you" for your family or anyone else until you start taking care of yourself.
Where to start? I think you have some good advice from the other posters. Calorie counting is such a basic way of getting at weight loss and is tried and true. My advice is whatever you do, pick a plan that you can live with for the long haul (although don't be afraid to change plans along the way if you need to). Diets that are too restrictive set you up for failure, in my opinion. You have to do something that you can live with because this really is about changing your eating habits and overall lifestyle... forever.
I also recommend adding exercise to whatever program you are doing. I have never been someone who exercised much. But, during the last year, I have been consistently exercising and it has made all the difference. Even if you start off doing something like walking (which is what I did), it is so important that you start moving if you aren't already doing that.
I wish you the very best on your weight loss journey! Let us know how you are doing.
Welcome, Missy! You have already made a great start! You posted here and you are asking all of the right questions. I am so impressed that your questions perfectly illustrate the structure you'll need to succeed.
Pick answers to your questions that appeal to you now and try them. You will learn so much just by changing a few things in your life. Then, it will be easier to figure out what small tweaks would improve things, or what big changes will work for you.
I like exchange plans (like 4 proteins, 3 grains, 6 vegetables per day), but I have to admit that I think the dedicated calorie counters lose weight more efficiently than I do. I just can't seem to get myself to pay attention at that level of detail.
While you're in the early days and have all this enthusiasm, I really think that one of the websites where you record your food intake and it computes the calories and nutrients that Vladadog mentioned is a good way to start. I use them now and then and always learn a lot. Maybe you'll like that as a permanent part of your journey, but even if you don't, you will learn a lot about what you eat and how it effects things.
I have stumbled upon this site and registered and everything. This is exactly what I need to help motivate me and keep me motivated. To be honest with you I need a friend.
I am a 43 year old single Mother (for 5 years) of two daughters one 20 and the other 24.
I am dealing with the "empty nest syndrom" I never thought it was a "real" syndrom, but I have painfully found out that it is real and I am choosing to call it a new and beautiful chapter in my life and the lives of my beautiful daughters.
You see 2 years ago I made a monumental mistake and instead of my closest friends forgiving me they have ALL deserted me. I am desperatly trying to put my life in order. I have pretty much turned into a loner and a reclused person other than with my daughters that is.
I am not sure why I am putting this all out there, but I guess it just shows how desperate I am. I am desperate to turn my life around starting with myself.
I have stumbled upon this site and registered and everything. This is exactly what I need to help motivate me and keep me motivated. To be honest with you I need a friend.
I am a 43 year old single Mother (for 5 years) of two daughters one 20 and the other 24.
I am dealing with the "empty nest syndrom" I never thought it was a "real" syndrom, but I have painfully found out that it is real and I am choosing to call it a new and beautiful chapter in my life and the lives of my beautiful daughters.
You see 2 years ago I made a monumental mistake and instead of my closest friends forgiving me they have ALL deserted me. I am desperatly trying to put my life in order. I have pretty much turned into a loner and a reclused person other than with my daughters that is.
I am not sure why I am putting this all out there, but I guess it just shows how desperate I am. I am desperate to turn my life around starting with myself.
thank you to my future friends...
Welcome to 3FC and good luck with your goals
Last edited by Onederchic; 06-27-2010 at 08:30 PM.
You are taking a big first step by coming here, and also by realizing that you are the most important person that you need to look after. I can relate, as I'm sure that lots here can. Often, we are too busy doing and taking care of others and "things" that we neglect ourselves.
There are lots of great wise people here, so you are definitely in the right place.
I would suggest looking around, reading up on various plans and such, and see what makes you feel comfortable, and honestly evaluate if it's something you can do as a lifestyle change, rather than a lose weight quickly thing.
I like to journal just in a cheap simple notebook. I find it helps me a lot to stay accountable when I write down what I eat, my water, any exercise, and any little notes.
As for exercise, it sounds like you are getting some with yard work. Try to do what you can, even if it's just going for a brisk walk for a few minutes. Every little bit helps!
Best of luck, and looking forward to seeing you around the boards.
Hi everyone! Thank you so much for the replies, especially the advice & encouragement. I appreciate all of you so thank you again.
I will definitely do what was suggested and read up on the different plans to see which will best suit me. In the meantime while I search for the best plan, would you suggest anything to start? I was thinking at the very LEAST cutting my meals in half. The problem I have though is that when I have breakfast/lunch/dinner ... I don't eat that much to begin with. My problem comes in snacking ... and I suppose maybe what I actually eat for my three meals ... though I may eat the right portions, they are CLEARLY not the right foods. So is there some rules I could go ahead and follow right away while I'm choosing a plan in the next few days?
As for exercising, I'm definitely going to walk every day to start atleast ... and about mowing the lawn - I already use the push mower so thats a good habit haha. I am terrified of the riding lawn mower ( dont ask ) so I always push ... plus I bag the grass so maybe I should start moving the lawn bags to opposite sides of the yard I'm working on so I have to walk even further to empty them in between.
I will also get on those websites that were suggested about the food logs. I may do a regular notebook too ... just to keep with me while I'm away from the computer so I dont forget to log anything in.
Again, thank you so much for all of our words of support and kindness. I really appreciate it. Its nice to know I'm not alone is this struggle!
Oh another quick question ... just in a quick sweep of the boards so far I keep seeing " WATER! DRINK WATER! " How much is suggested to drink a day? Sadly, I never just drink a glass of water. I'm a big fan of tea though ... I weened myself off soda by drinking unsweetened iced tea ... and then started to venture into the tea dept finding different teas to drink. For 3 weeks now I haven't touched a soda. So that's a start I suppose but I never drink JUST water. I should probably start doing that right away too but how much is my question?
No idea where to start.
Dhani 
As to where to start, figuring out a plan that fits you and your lifestyle is a great thing to do, in my opinion. I count calories and exercise. You can check out more on calorie counting and other eating plans at our Diet Central here - 
Missy!
