Hi everyone! A close friend found this forum for me after I lurked at the WW message boards and then ran away in fear. He's sick of listening to me have irrational meltdowns, so I need a place to get & give support, and have the occasional freak out in the company of those who understand it.
This is my 3rd (i hope final) attempt at weight watchers. Countless other short-lived attempts at eating better, exercising, etc all lead no where.
When I finally realized that I was closer to 300 than 250, I cried and then said "this is it....no more". I've gained and lost a little over the years, but mostly it been packing on for 12 years. I don't like the way I look. I don't like the way I feel. I hate shopping for clothes and lingerie and bras, staring longingly at the "skinny girl" clothes and trying to pick something suitable for a 33-yr-old-who-looks-25 from the 5 whole racks we get to choose from.
I have fibromyalgia and something else thats yet to be diagnosed. I have a bulging disc at L5 thats resulted in nerve-pinching and sore/spasming muscles (2 yrs ago I started walking, for weight loss, i slowly ramped it up and my back hurt more and more till one day it "went out" and then I spent a lot of time in physical therapy). Exercise is not easy for me, to say the least. I have to be very careful and cannot abide by the "no pain no gain" motto.
I'm here because I need help, and I'm scared. Scared I'll fail again, scared of a life eating bunny food and bland meats just to drop weight, scared the weight loss won't make me feel better....but I'm still plugging along. I have no choice anymore. This unhealthy cycle ends now.
