Hello,

I'm new here...I'm 40 years old, I currently weigh 162lbs and need to lose this weight.

I've been married for almost 4 years. I have a daughter (2) and a stepson (12) that lives with us fulltime. We are a military family and my husband returned from deployment in April.

After our daughter was born, I was about 8lbs from my pre-preggo weight when I became depressed and turned to food for comfort. I put on all my preggo weight + some. When my husband deployed, I had the goal of getting back into shape. That didn't happen...since he's returned we have not gotten along very well. He finally admitted yesterday that he is very disappointed in me that I haven't lost the weight and gotten my figure back. Instead of saying something to me, he has been nasty to me since his return.

This admission coincides with my "rock bottom" feeling. I hate the way I look and feel. I really need to get back into shape. My stepson creates ALOT of stress in our home and I know that exercise helps me deal with his issues. I also don't want our daughter to watch me struggle with weight, like I watched my mom.

I used to be a exercise/running fiend. So I'm jumping back in. I ran yesterday morning and I'm headed to the gym today with friends to do a spin class.

Thought I'd join up here to find some online friends. I struggle with food and making the right choices. Once I get my "groove on" with exercise, I'm good with goals...just finding the energy. My husband feels like a total "jerk" for the way he's been treating me and his offering full support.

Thanks for reading - sorry so long! I needed to tell someone what husband has done. Kinda hurts my feelings that he doesn't feel he can be honest with me.

I am new, also, and I have to say that your husband's attitude would devastate me. I've tried hard to avoid letting others set weight goals for me, or approve of me only when I am slender. I've always felt the message was "You are okay thin, but fat your are not okay."

I suspect that most of us with weight issues have even bigger problems of self esteem. We easily reject ourselves - we don't need others doing the same.

Oops. I couldn't resist writing all that. You hit a nerve with me.

Welcome to 3FC and good luck with your goals.

Hugs
Michelle

Yep, that pretty much sums up how I feel. I have huge self esteem issues...told him he should love me and not my dress size. That now I am starting to question if whatever size I get to - what if that's not ok for him? Will he continue his nasty campaign with me if I'm not how he wants me to be? My weight loss is for me - not anybody else. He says he just wants me to have my figure back - that he doesn't have a pre-determined weight for me. Whatever. Again - this is about me.

I think he's a total "jerk" and personally I think this signals bigger problems in our marriage.

Thanks for reading & the support!

Hi 115hereicome!
It's sounds like you're ready to go with the right attitude - this is for you & the rest will fall into place one way or another - good luck with your goals - we'll be the support you need, here cheering you on!

Glad to have you join us! There are lots & lots of different groups and forums - I'm sure you'll find some that will keep you motivated, inspired and entertained! You'll also find info and first hand advice on different plans to help get through the ups and downs.

There are bunches of people here with more to lose and some with less - the bottom line is that we all have to do it a day at a time. The good thing is that we'll have lots of company along the way.

I've only been here a short time myself, having NEVER been part of an online forum. What has been so eye-opening is how much it has helped me. Whenever I feel overwhelmed or defeated, I just log on and read some of the success stories, complete with their before & after photos - or read about others still dealing day to day with their challenges - and before I know it, the time has flown by and so have all the thoughts of cheating or giving up.

So welcome - you've found the right place - join in by inspiring us and being inspired!