Hi everyone, I'm Maria and I'm very overweight at 233 pounds. I'm married and a mother of three and my weight has been out of control ever since I had my first child ten years ago. The last five years it has seriously taken an effect on my life, mood and health. I lost 50 pounds a couple of years ago, with portion control and exercising but gained every ounce back. I'm depressed and unhappy but can't seem to get out of the cycle of overeating. I've read every diet book out there and ignored all of them. I hate counting calories. I suffer from very bad PMS, which seems to rule my life three weeks out of the four. I take anti anxiety meds. I ate four English muffins for breakfast this morning. People think that I'm happy and content, I keep my feelings to myself, I'm very private like that. I love my kids but my marriage is rocky.
I know I need to do something to improve the quality of my life and for my kids but I can't keep anything going for a day or two. Writing these things, (gosh, reading back they sound so negative) hopefully is a step in the right direction. I just need to take the next step. Thank you for having me
Do you keep a diary where you write down your thoughts and feelings? Perhaps it will help.
By coming here you've made such a great step. Everyone is very encouraging! You need to want to transform yourself...and you can and will be able to do so. Come back each day and talk to us; it'll help you to convince yourself that yes, you absolutely can do this!
Don't be afraid to go to the doctor's if you need help handling the PMS Things like getting outside for half an hour each day can help too. You need to take care of yourself just as much as you do your family.
Please see your doctor about the pms, which could be PMDD. I was finally diagnosed in my mid-40s while suffering for years. Like you, most of my month was miserable. It also made it nearly impossible to lose weight. Its like my body just did not work during those weeks.
For me, the solution was Seasonale, so I only get periods 4 times a year. I also am on a anti-depressant but was before the Seasonale. Anyway, good luck to you!
Hello, Maria, I am glad you are joining us. It sounds like you have reached the point where you recognize that things have to change.
In terms of your weight and eating issues, I think you will find this board very useful. You are not alone; people can relate to you. The support and advice is incredible.
Maria, we're so glad to have you join us. We're all in the same boat here, at one point in our lives or another, and everyone here is very supportive and helpful. So, you've made a really good decision to hang out with us!
I too have read everything and can't manage to stay with anything for a day (or an hour sometimes!), but over time I've made small yet significant choices that have put me on a path to good health. For me, the first thing I had to get on top of was adequate sleep. Because if I haven't slept well, then I overeat, a lot, and I'm edgy and cranky and can't make good decisions.
Going to bed at the same time every night, getting up at the same time every morning, and getting eight hours of sleep is exactly what I need. I also use a CPAP device (because I have sleep apnea). I take melatonin about an hour before bed, and I also lift weights about four hours before bed. That cools my body down and gets me sleepy. If I don't stay on top of this (and I don't always do so, because life just gets in the way) then I suffer.
I am finally learning to take really good care of myself. Because there's no one in my life who will do that for me.
Check out my blog (listed below) and you can read about my road to improving my health.
This a huge step. This is a huge step asking for help, admitting you have a problem, admitting you have a rocky marriage, etc. This can be THE DAY.
As someone that also suffers from depression, I feel comfortable sharing these thoughts with you. Like you I took anti-depressants for a long time. Unfortunately, I felt better--actually just "flat-lined" which was better than where I HAD been--and ended up gaining 60 pounds and the cycle started again.
Bottom line, I made a move towards WHOLE FOODS and got the processed out of my diet on the most part. I started Fish Oil, started getting tons of sunshine and regular exercise. I established regular sleep patterns--not too little and not too much.
Last, as far as feeling better--FAKE IT UNTIL YOU MAKE IT. I still have to do this some days. Do the things you *think* healthy, happy people do. For me, that meant straightening up my house each day, taking care of my body through nutrition and exercise and putting myself "out there" with people I am comfortable with. Do the same with your marriage. Do the things you would do if you were 100% head over heels in love with him and as if he is 100% head over heels for you.
You can do this. Today can be THE DAY.
Last edited by Thighs Be Gone; 10-17-2009 at 12:48 PM.
First - you absolutely CAN do this!
It is work. It won't happen without a commitment and follow-through from you.
But, you've taken the first step, coming here was a GREAT idea.
The folk here can help you get started, and help you stay accountable.
And - a wee bit of advice from an old chickie - start now - TODAY - RIGHT THIS MINUTE!
You will be so glad you did. I gotta tell ya - when my eating is under control and I am eating healthy life-givng foods - the rest of my life goes so much better
I know you hate calorie counting, but it is a great plan - it sure works for me!!!
Thank you all so much for the welcome and encouraging words. I've started a blog here called 'Confessions of a Day Dreamer' and will start posting my progress or whatever comes into my head . I also have an appointment on Tuesday with my Dr for an annual check up; so I will mention all my issues to him and see what he recommends for losing weight, PMS and depression. Today is just a really bad day depression wise and period wise, I'm just about hanging on but finding these message boards has been a very good thing. I'll poke around and read up on what everyone is doing. Thanks again!
Thank you . I'm sure it will go ok, I'm just not sure what I need to do to feel better at this point. Hopefully my Dr will be able to give me some guidance and direction.
Glad to have you join us! There are lots & lots of different groups and forums - I'm sure you'll find some that will keep you motivated, inspired and entertained!
There are lots of people here with more to lose and lots with less - the bottom line is that we all have to do it a day at a time. The good thing is that we'll have lots of company along the way.
I've only been here a short time myself, having NEVER been part of an online forum. What has been so eye-opening is how much it has helped me. Whenever I feel overwhelmed or defeated, I just log on and read some of the success stories, complete with their before & after photos - or read about others still dealing day to day with their challenges - and before I know it, the time has flown by and so have all the thoughts of cheating or giving up.
So welcome aboard - join in by inspiring us and being inspired!
YOU CAN DO THIS - WE HAVE ALL BEEN (OR STILL ARE) WHERE YOU ARE - YOU HAVE THE BEST REASON IN THE WORLD TO SUCCEED - A BETTER LIFE FOR YOU AND YOUR KIDS.
Thank you, I have been doing lots of reading around the boards and feeling very inspired and can't wait to move forward at this point. Seeing the before and after photos is such a motivator. I will continue to check in and post and today I plan to set my first mini goal!
New Here and Miserable
Hi Maria!
