[Acid Rain]

Ok... I'll try to make this kind of short...


Hi. My name is Ashley. I'm 19 (20 this Sunday) and 306 lbs. I've never been this heavy in my whole life, but I have always been a big girl. I think it started in 9th grade. My mom took me out of highschool for some dumb reasons (I'll only elaborate if you really care to know) and decided to start homeschooling me. My mom decided also that I needed to lose some weight so she asked me if it was cool with me that I started Weight Watchers. I did. My first weigh-in I was 267.7 lbs. Also that year, I became an internet junkie. Well, as I was searching the lovely web, I started veering into dieting forums. I decided that this whole WW thing wasn't going to help me as much as I needed. I needed something extreme.
As I was looking around these forums, I found a forum called "Futurebird: The Thin Forum". It was a pro-ed board and at the time I was begging for an eating disorder. All I wanted was to lose some weight. I didn't really want to be too thin at the time, but I knew it was something that I dreamed of. I started looking up "tips" on how to not eat, how to fake eating a lot around people, how to lie, how to starve. I had this thing in my brain. I named her Ana. I was dumb.
Months past, I started losing a lot more weight than I should have been. My WW leader pointed out that 7 lbs in one week was way too much (especially when I had been in the program over 4 months already). One week I went in and I had lost 10 lbs... Rediculous. My mom took me out of WW because I was losing too much weight and told me that if I wasn't going to follow the program correctly, then she wasn't going to pay for it. Fine with me. I was 232 when I left...
The lowest weight I got to was 217. My week consisted of starving all week and then on the weekend, I would binge and purge... My mom found out and took me to the dr. They gave me the normal warning that if I continued it could effect my health, yadda yadda yadda. I never got any lower.
I started gaining some of my weight back. I was 240 something again. Then I got my 2nd boyfriend of my life, I was 17. By the end of that relationship (a whole 3 months), I had gotten back up to 260's-270's. By the time I was 18, I had gained more weight back, I was up to 290. I was scared. I had never been that high before. I started the whole starving thing again, and I was prescribed adderall for my adhd and got down to 260.
I stayed there until I met my current (and hopefully last) boyfriend... Of course, as I have been told, the happier you are, the easier it is for you to gain weight. Now, just over 300, I'm a mess. I'm freaking out. I don't have the crutch of my adderall anymore... I have to do this on my own. I know I can do this...

I was told about this site from somebody at another website I am on. I don't feel like I fit in there... everybody is either a little over weight to underweight. I just hope I can find some support here.

Okiedokie...

That was long and boring. ^_^ Oh well.

PM me if you wanna talk or something. I'd like to make some friends.
k...bye.

[nickname]

you always hear that you can't make people do anything. but it sounds like you know what you want to do. good luck to you

[JayEll]

Hey Ashley,

What a trip you've had... gosh...

Some people gain weight when they're happy, some people gain weight when they're unhappy, and some people just gain weight, period. Boyfriend or no boyfriend, too. So just set that aside.

I'd say find a moderate approach. Fast weight loss isn't good. Much as we would like to all get to our goal weight next week, it's not going to happen unless we are only two pounds away!

That's why the planned programs can be successful--they have you eating enough food to get proper nourishment, but restricted enough to lose weight, namely fat. If you lose weight too fast, you are losing muscle and everything else along with the fat.

But you can also lose weight by counting calories. That's what I do. I aim for 1200 per day, but my average is around 1350. I also track my activity level so I know how much I'm burning. FitDay is an online site that has a free calculator if you use it online--or you can download it to your computer. (1200 would NOT be enough for you because your weight is much higher than mine, and you are young.)

Anyway, I sure wish you luck! You're in it for the long haul, but you'll see--if you stay with a good plan, you'll be happy when you come out the other side.

Jay

[HeatherAngel]

Hi Ashley -I'm new here, too, and I have more than 100lbs to lose! Let's keep each other at it, okay?

Beeeeg Hugs right atcha, girl!
Heather

[Cheryl14]

Hi Ashley!

Welcome to 3FC!

The great thing about this site is that there are SO MANY people here, and everyone is supportive and kind. I know that you will find many good friends here your age, and many older ones, too! Weight loss is one of those things that seems to be a common denominator that brings people together of many ages!

It sounds like you know what DOESN'T work, and that's good. Weight loss takes a lot of adjusting your head as well as your body!

I'm with Jay about the calorie counting thing. I've tried stuff like not weighing myself and just looking at how my clothes FIT, but I seemed to need something more solid that I could hang on to. Calorie counting and using Fitday helped me get ten pounds off over the last month and a half. That was a stubborn ten I'll tell you!

I used to eat whatever I wanted. I live in an all-male household (husband and two sons), and somehow along the way I thought it was appropriate for me to eat like a teenage BOY! I ate MUCH larger portions of all the wrong things, and I did it for more years than you have been on this earth! I didn't exercise, either. About seven years ago that all changed, and I have lost 76 of the VERY STUBBORN pounds that I gained while I was in LA-LA LAND about how to eat!

Do you have an idea of how you want to lose your weight this time?

Cheryl