Intuitive Eating Support Thread #2
 

Guess we have to start a new thread.

Everyone welcome.

I made the mistake of hopping on the scale and finding out I've gained a couple of pounds. Tis the season for apple pie I suppose.

I found this tip and I will be trying it today. http://www.refinery29.uk/2016/10/125881/intuitive-eating-post-it-trick

Ha ha.

It made me laugh.

I liked the sticky note article/idea. I definitely think it could make a difference. Let us know how it goes Palestrina!

I noticed something interesting last night. I have pretty much stopped eating after dinnertime. I usually have a small bit of something sweet about 10 minutes after dinner and then I don't eat until morning, even if I feel a little hungry before bed. I started doing this because it seemed every time I ate before bed, even just a little bit, it made it hard to sleep. I have come to really enjoy that empty feeling before bed as well.

So its probably been about 2 months that I have been consistently doing that. Last night a couple hours after dinner I really wanted some food. Because I pretty much just don't eat after dinner it was unusual for me so I examined it and realized it wasn't physical hunger, it was definitely the urge to soothe as we have had some stressful stuff going on. I thought about eating anyway, but then I got busy with my usual routine and forgot all about it since I wasn't actually hungry. I realized as I went to bed that I never did follow the eating urge and I think its because its more unusual now for me to eat after dinner, than it is to eat. If I was still eating after dinner and before bed, Im sure I would have not questioned the urge and just eaten.

So, for me I think habit is important too. maybe habit working in conjunction with listening to my body? Anyway, I definitely don't think it would work to make a rule of never eating after dinner, like in a diet or eating rules, its just a self care thing I started doing for myself after I realized I didn't get good sleep from late night snacking.

Another thing I have started noticing is that certain foods actually affect my mood. Sometimes if I eat food that my brain doesn't really want, but that my body does, I feel much better. Like vegetables. I physically feel so much better when I eat lots of vegetables. So, even if Im not craving them, I make them part of almost every meal now and I always feel great after I eat them so I keep eating them, even though my head thinks I just want something like peanut butter and bread or a bowl of cereal. It's weird. Like the other day, I was craving a peanut butter banana sandwich. I made half of one and then ate a peanut butter cookie. Shortly after that I noticed I was suddenly feeling sad and depressed. So, I ate some green beans with a little bit of baked chicken and shortly after, even though we got some bad news in the interim, I felt so much better! It was kind of crazy.

I would like to get to that point with exercise but so far I haven't gotten there. I know exercise makes me feel so much better, but the motivation has not yet been there for me to be consistent with it. Baby steps though right? I did some yoga 2 days ago and it felt amazing yet I still haven't done any since. I don't know what my block with exercise is.

Anyway, just some ramblings for anyone who is reading. Maybe it will be helpful to someone down the road. :)

I can't sleep when I'm hungry but then I have a lot of trouble sleeping because of neuropathy.

Yeah I have a hard time sleeping too but just because of my anxiety I think. Feeling anything in my stomach seems to keep me up longer though.

Our stressful situation seems to be finally hopefully resolved for the most part so Im hoping that will also help me with sleeping and anxiety. And emotional eating urges.

:carrot:

Just me hanging out here on this thread!

So, I started drinking anti anxiety tea before bed and I have found it helpful. I have found it so helpful and enjoyable to be relieved of so much of my anxiety that I also started doing more meditational techniques.

I also started just dancing around to music in my bedroom. I love to dance and always have but either a. feel too self conscious about it, even by myself. Or b. like I'm not working hard enough burning enough calories, working my muscles the right way.

However, I think I finally started moving for the joy of moving. If I just focus on how good it feels and how happy it makes me, it is easier to overcome all those other thoughts. It's funny sometimes when I am dancing around I still get the random thought of "you are 40 years old, what do you think you are doing?" Like it would be better if I was 25? That thought makes no logical sense.

My mind seems to be my own worst enemy in taking care of myself.

As far as eating goes, I'm still eating way more veggies than I used to and feeling the benefits. I also feel like I am getting better at stopping when I am full, or getting more in tune with my body than I used to be. Now I can really feel the sensation of fullness really strongly where it used to be very hard to tell if I was full. I am now eating pretty much 3 meals a day because eating more times than that starts to get more murky for me being able to tell if I am hungry and consequently, satisfied and full.

How is everyone else doing?

Hi Pinkhippie, I love dancing too. I don't dance in my house though, I go to zumba classes. Eventually when I have enough time I want to sign up for hip hop classes, I've done a few and they're really fun.

I feel like my body is very angry. My pelvic injury is flared up again and I've gained a little bit of weight recently. I put on my fat pants (the pants I wear when nothing else seems to fit) and they were tight. Obviously that didn't feel good. But walking has been so difficult for me. Yesterday I realized that walking around makes me out of breath - that has never happened before. I'm worried that something is wrong because I've had some rapid weight gain recently. I'll be seeing my doctor soon.

That isawesome that you take Zumba! I would love to do some classes at some point. Financially and timewise right now it works better for me to get down in my house. Im hoping that once my husband is employed again, I will be able to do something like that. I have a friend that does Zumba and she loves it! I have a good amount of ballet training from childhood/teen years and I think it would be cool to take an adult ballet class one of these days as well.

Im sorry to hear about your pelvic injury. :( I have a chronic ankle injury that sometimes flares up and makes it painful to walk or get any kind of exercise and it is so disheartening and distressing. I am glad you are seeing your Dr, sounds like something is definitely going on with your body. Good for you for taking care of yourself and addressing it.

I couldn't get satisfied this morning. Had crackers with meat spread, toast with nut butter and strawberries, orange juice and more cheese crackers. Finally just gave up.

I have days like that sometimes. The toast with nut butter and strawberries sounds good. :)

Thanks .

New favorite breakfast: oatmeal with chopped apples with a pat of butter, cooked for 3 minutes in the microwave and then drizzled with maple syrup and sprinkled with walnuts. yum!

I am feeling worried about my husband. He has gained a lot of weight recently. His dad died in his early sixties from weight related diabetes and heart complications. My husband has major texture aversions and pretty much eats only processed foods except for the salsa he makes from scratch every week ( with corn chips) and his meal replacement raw meal shakes of which he has several. Other than that, its tombstone pizzas, pizza rolls, chicken nuggets, corn chips, beef jerky, dry cereal, and cookies or smarties. It is hard to watch and handle lately. I also feel I can't really say anything as I am "intuitively" enjoying a bowl of ice cream or a big helping of pasta alfredo.

My husband has always talked about his blood sugar problems and having to eat every few hours. He laughs at my idea of only eating when Im hungry and thinks I am a weirdo for following that. In fact just this morning we had a conversation about it. I don't even think he knows when he is hungry. He rides his bike about 30 miles a week and refuses to believe me that that alone will keep his weight down and him healthy.

Anyway, thanks for letting me vent. I am not sure what to do but it helps to talk about it. :)

What a predicament. Unfortunately there is not much you can do, especially if he has a medical condition with this aversion to texture. Which makes me wonder, I feel that in recent years people have been expressing their food dislikes in strange ways. Everybody is throwing out words like "intolerance" "sensitive" "allergic" "addicted" and "averse" when it comes to food. To me, I don't understand what role these words play in how we handle food. I can understand someone being lactose intolerant, or allergic to peanuts, but I know lots of people who say they are sensitive to gluten or averse to texture, or in some cases claim they have a bad reaction to a certain food. It's a very complicated way to form a relationship with food and find it especially strange if it stems from a very simple "I don't like it." Isn't this just dysfunctional eating behavior?

So I'll admit here that I do indeed have food rules. One, is "NO NIGHT EATING." It just gets me into trouble and I always regret it. There are times I am hungry at night and eat when I need to if it's from hunger but 9 times out of 10 I'm bored and want to stress eat after hours. The other rule is EAT VEGGIES NO MATTER WHAT! It's not like I force myself to eat salads instead of burgers but I will force myself to eat a salad in addition to my burger. Every meal must have vegetables in it. It's non negotiable. I happen to like veggies but even so, I don't always feel like eating them but I make myself do it anyway. I can have the fries, but I must have the broccoli too. Pay the piper, get the nutrients in, take the pill and don't ask questions. There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables
There is no health without vegetables

Know what I mean? So whatever your husband has to do, getting veggies in is important. If it's a texture aversion drink them in a juice, pulverize them and hide them in the sauce or in a meatloaf, or dice them up finely over the tombstone (I love tombstone pizza, best frozen pizza there is). Does this make any sense? I'm of the mind that grown ups have to do grown up stuff, we have to pay our taxes, we have to go to work, we have to fold the laundry, and we have to eat veggies. Don't think about it too much just do it. Eat the broccoli and chase it with a chicken nugget.

I wish there were a like button.

Thank you for your thoughts. You could be right. My husband and my daughters have weird sensory issues that I think could be at play in their eating. I don't have sensory issues so I don't quite get it. But, I have seen my husband chew up a broccoli stem(with loathing) so I know he can do it. He is drinking his meal replacement shakes which supposedly have all kinds of dehydrated veggie goodness so its been hard to convince him to eat "extra" veggies. But I will make a concerted effort.

I have the same food rules as you. I try to eat veggies with lunch and dinner almost every day and I try not to eat at night.

Thanks for your thoughts Palestrina.

I HAVEN'T BEEN HUNGRY ALL DAY. Tomorrow is a new day.

I never eat on Tday, it's just a day with much excitement and too much excitement doesn't warrant eating for me. It's the leftovers that I have a problem with.

Don't know how you do it.

We don't have left over.............40 people for dinner.

How is everyone doing after Thanksgiving? I'm a little bloated but I can safely say I don't want any more apple pie. For a while.

What a week. It's good to go back to being hungry.

lol totally agree only in my case, its pumpkin pie and pecan.
I know! I have really enjoyed being hungry all this week. There was so much food everywhere this Thanksgiving weekend that it was hard to ever be hungry, I was constantly nibbling.

I have experienced a shift in my thinking. I kind of went through a phase where i felt like I really wanted to lose weight and read diet books and it was really hard to keep myself away from them, and I was weighing myself often. I gave myself food rules in the framework of IE and I got really into it.

Then something shifted and I can't stand another food rule ever again. I don't want to read diet books, I don't even want to read IE books right now. I have stopped focusing on my weight, and I also stopped weighing myself. I have tailored work pants and they are a true size 12. I also have some 20 year old jeans from express that are size 12. (real size 12) As long as they fit, or are a little loose, I am happy. I think my body weight has remained pretty stable since I stopped weighing myself.

I can't even read any of the other threads here at 3fc because it makes me so sad to see what people are willing to do to try to change their weight. I recognize that health issues can cause us to need to reduce our body size, but I just don't think diets are the way to do it. Anyway, I feel pretty content right now. In the back of my mind of course I would like to lose another 10 pounds but I am just done not accepting my body the way it is and trying to change it. SOOOOOOO done. NOw I am striving to accept my body just as it is. Hand in hand with this I think goes getting older. I am 41 next year and I have been struggling to accept that yes I DO look older. My face is not the same as it was even 10 years ago and that is ok! I am older. Self acceptance is the name of the game for me right now.

I have also been striving to feel more gratitude and enjoy my life more. I try to look at what I can be grateful for as much as possible, especially when I start feeling negative. I think that has really helped too.

Anyway, I hope everyone is doing well! I know we all struggle with our journey, but hopefully we are continuing to move forward, inch by incremental inch.

Pinkhippie I'm so envious of the place you are in right now. I think I'm back at square one, only heavier than ever. I'm back in the throes of my eating disorder and hating my body terribly. Only now I feel worse because I know better and I should do better. In all honesty I think I am battling depression so I'm looking into finding a therapist that can help me with that. I have had bouts of depression before and have always managed to stay away from medication but I think I will agree to it this time. Anything to make it better at this point.

I've subscribed to a lot of Health at Every Size bloggers on social media and have recently started reading the comments. It depresses me to no end. People are so hateful of fat bodies, and those are just the people who speak out against being fat, I suspect that most people really truly hate fat people and are disgusted by us. I see it, I experience it, and I believe it. These social bloggers are beautiful women wearing beautiful clothes and they are torn to bits by fat shamers. If I never hear the phrase "glorifying obesity" ever again it will be too soon. Hating fat people is the only type of hatred that is sanctioned in our society.

Just returned from my FIL funeral. I feel that I'm all mixed up eating wise.

So sorry for your loss. It's a difficult time and grieving has its own effect on our bodies. Be compassionate with yourself, always.

I can't seem to find hunger and it worries me.

I am so sorry Palestrina. It is so difficult in our society. I was looking at old pictures of myself today and I was probably about 10- 15 pounds thinner and I started thinking the old diet/eating disorder thoughts about not eating for a few weeks so I could finally be back to my old size. It is so hard to have a bigger body than I used to. But, I talked myself down, realizing that I have done this song and dance hundreds of times and it NEVER WORKS. Im going to continue not to weigh myself and not make eating a big deal, just eat when Im hungry ( or not) and try to take care of my body as best I can right now. I know what you mean about the hate comments from people about bigger bodies. I am not sure why those people have so much hatered towards other peoples bodies. One of my good friends was medically obese and she HATED other overweight people. She was so critical of them, and I realized it was because she hated herself. :(


That is good that you are going to find a therapist, I hope it helps with depression. That sounds like something that would be good to get help with, and being strong enough to look for help and accept it to take better care of yourself, is I think, really good.


I agree with this. Im sorry for your loss also Carol.

I know that when I am experiencing a lot of emotional turbulence or very strong emotion, that I temporarily lose my appetite. Maybe this is what you are going through after your loss?

I hope that's it.

Hey all. I do look at your posts even if I don't participate often. Life has been so busy- I found a loving partner and moved in with him. I started a master's program in library science. I celebrated two years of sobriety and two years in treatment for bulimia. I haven't binged or purged in 9 weeks!!! I still struggle with anxiety, body image, and "food rules," but life is a million times better now.

Pinkhippie: Stay strong. Reading about your struggles is so comforting to me. I always think "me too!" when I read about what you are going through. I'm sorry to hear about your family's problems with eating. My partner eats terribly, too. I try to support him and not be judgmental even if it does give me a ton of anxiety.

Palestrina: I'm sorry that you are struggling. You are on the right path. I definitely second the motion for therapy. Therapy has helped me so much because I work on the things that cause my ED behaviors. I love the body positive / fat positive blogs but I loathe the comments, too. Just remember that a lot (and I mean A LOT) of the negative comments come from people struggling with their own problems with body image and eating disorders. There is a reason that they're going after fat people for being unhealthy and not say, people who drink more than 2 drinks in a single evening.

Carol: I'm sorry you have lost your appetite. That happens to me when I get stressed, too. In my eating disorder program we are encouraged to practice "mechanical eating" if we lose our appetites from stress. That means eating 3 meals and 2-3 snacks a day until you can eat more intuitively again. If you stop eating it can make stress a million times worse.

I never lose weight so I must be doing ok. ha

Hi Locke! Glad you came for a visit, it's nice to hear from you again. Congrats on all the wonderful things you've made happen in your life. As you can see things are a little quiet around here, there's a small handful of us still checking in and staying strong but overall the whole site has dwindled to just a few people. It does help to check in though when things get rough. Hope to see you more often!

So things have flipped again. I've burst through my binge and now I'm all intuitive again. It's hard to describe the feeling of coming out of a binge. My binges can last for a long time. They are not one isolated food escape, they are prolonged periods of not caring, not feeling hunger, being lost within my emotions. I feel almost like a robot and I can't control what I eat no matter what I say to myself or what logic I try to hold on to. Then suddenly I burst through some sort of bubble and a loud voice from within me says "NOOOO" and it's like I wake up and I'm suddenly able to feel the sensation of fullness. By the time the binge is over I feel very very full, very finished, and very ready to move on. I am suddenly released by food and tend to eat very little. It's like my nervous system is overloaded and I need to decompress from all the food. I do eat, I just seem to have very little connection with the food and my hunger and fullness systems are hypersensitive. Like last night we went out to dinner and my mind and body were screaming at me "not hungry not hungry" and I was puzzled and didn't know what to do. I ended up picking at a salad so that I wouldn't just sit there making anyone else feel uncomfortable.

At the same time I snap back into my body and crave a lot of movement, sensation, intimacy, dance, every physical experience seems intense and lovely. Even showering and doing my makeup, and putting on clothes, everything just feels alive and good.

I really don't know what this means because this seems to happen on and off, I can look back and see that this is how things go for me. I'm fine I'm fine I'm fine, then I enter a phase of binging where I feel numb to everything. Then suddenly I'm jolted awake and feel alive, awake and normal. But it's puzzling to me, how can I be so good at intuitive eating during these phases and then slip into an emotional coma? What does this mean and how do I make those phases end?

At the same time I've slowly come to realize that I'm quite unhappy with my life and there are so many things that are bringing me unhappiness. I don't mean little stuff, I mean big things like where I live, my relationships, my marriage, my career, basically the whole direction my life has taken. On one hand I'm so grateful for the life I have but in so many ways I question if I've chosen the right life to live. This really sucks.

Locke! So great to hear from you! I have been wondering how you have been doing. How cool about your masters program in library science! Do you like it? I have contemplated doing that as well. ( Once I finish my bachelors). Im so happy for you that you have found a great partner as well, Congrats on your sobriety and binge/ purge freeness! That is really wonderful!

Im glad my sharing of my struggles is helpful. Yep I do have a lot of anxiety about my husband and his eating. Holding back the comments as he eats his 6th piece of pizza when I know he is not hungry is excruciatingly hard. I know that comments never help anyone. All I can do is try to keep following my hunger cues, even when he is practically telling me to eat a cookie or hot chocolate with him, even when I say I am not in the mood for one. Sigh...

Thanks for checking in!

It sounds like you are continuing to move towards more self awareness. I can definitely relate to what you are talking about with the phase of bingeing and emotional numbness. It does sound like you have got some big things brewing under the surface. Have you followed up on finding a therapist? It sounds like that would be really helpful with that as well. It can be so helpful to just talk to an objective listener sometimes. Did something happen in particular to trigger your intuitiveness/ release you from your emotional numbness? Also, can you think of anything that happened that triggered your bingeing?

I'm eating according to the clock. So today I didn't eat breakfast until 10 and I really want to skip lunch so I can be hungry for supper with my dh. I'm eating supper every night NOT HUNGRY. I want this to change but I can see it won't be wasy.