okay... i found out today, that there is a possibility that my in-laws will close the family shop. there's no timeline for it, yet, and they're going to do whatever they can to prevent it... but business has been really bad, for the past year or so, for the whole industry and there's no sign of it getting better, anytime soon.

the problem is... my DH has worked there for the past 10+ years. that's the only job he's ever had. i'm working there now, but looking at starting a job as the receptionist in a dentist's office, in January. i've had other job experience, so i shouldn't have too much trouble finding work... even if it's just retail, or customer service type work.

as it is, we struggle to make ends meet. living in southern California is just too darn expensive! so, we have the idea that we may need to move out of state, if the shop closes, just to be able to afford housing and whatnot... especially if we're going to depend on my income, instead of his. when i moved here, to marry my DH, i didn't quite do it in a conventional manner... so we have NO idea how to even start, or how to decide where to go.

we could go back east, to be near my family... but while housing is cheap, the job market is a little scary. aside from that, i don't even know what to look for, or where to go, or how much money we'll need to save up? truth be told, it's taking everything i have just to avoid panicking... so any advice would be helpful.

My husband is from LA and last year, my mother-in-law passed away. Point is, my brother-in-law did some real searching into cities that he might like to move to, since mom passed away and they no longer have that umbilical chord holding them to SO CAL, and he said that he might move to Spokane, WA. He said the cost of living is low there, the job market is wonderful and the way of living is great and a beautiful place. You might want to look into it, if you're looking to start fresh and new in a totally different world.

My niece, on the other hand, just moved to North Carolina because the job market there is also great. She got a job as a teacher very easily there.

Just a couple ideas for you. Think of it as an adventure!

California is definitely very expensive and you live in one of the most expensive areas. I used to live in Aliso Viejo and went to UCI for college, so I know.

You do have a couple different options - Move to a nearby city that is less expensive by moving to northern orange county, moving east (to whatever that group of cities over the mountains is considered) or moving south to some part of San Diego (my personal favorite is north county), you will automatically decrease the amount of money you spend on housing and other expenses.

You could move out of state - This can be very expensive but I really wouldn't do it unless you already had a job established somewhere. You or your husband might want to start posting on monster.com and other job related websites.

Do you have a savings? If not, start one now. Moving can be very expensive but so can be out of a job. I'd also recommend start cutting back on expenses as much as you can to prepare for a move somewhere.

Edited to add: I just saw techwife's recommendation. I have read a lot of good things about NC regarding decent housing and good job market. It is something to consider although moving cross country is a big step, I know

Step one: get a map of the US.
Step two: get two darts with different flags.
Step three: blindfold your DH and have him throw the dart.
Step four: have your DH blindfold you and you throw the dart.
Step five: find the midpoint between the two darts and start packin'!

Okay, all kidding aside, where does DH want to go? Where do you want to go? Start looking at job places like monster or etc to see where there is a fairly big demand for your job field(s). You can also take a look at cost of living (there are numerous sites that will compare it for you, if you search for "compare cost of living" at google). If you're moving quite a ways, you may want to invest in a moving company. You'll probably want at least a moving van, so you can pack and move everything all at once. I am a pack rat, so if I even get the slightest inclination to move, I start going through my stuff to get down to the "must have/can't part with" stuff before attempting to pack.

Good luck!

techwife: thanks for the suggestions... if nothing else, it gives me somewhere to start looking. i'm trying to look at the positives, but honestly, i could do with just a little less "adventure" in my life. *LOL* i swear, some days, i feel like my life is straight out of a tv show...

Nelie: we don't have a savings account worth mentioning. no exaggerating - every time we get money built up in our savings account, SOMEthing goes wrong, and requires us to drain it. but yes, we're planning on saving every little penny we can, because we know we'll need it for something or other. if it comes to it, moving cross country isn't such a big step for me (i lived in West Virginia, before i moved here.) it'll be a big deal for DH, though... he's lived here his whole life. but after thinking about it, i think we've got some options to rent a room from friends/family for a little bit, to save up money, before making any BIG moves. might even be able to get a place in Northern Cali, if we need to... DH and i are compiling a list of who we could possibly rent from, where they live, what the benefits would be, etc. here's hoping...

brandnewme: *LOL* oh my goodness! thank you for that... i needed a good laugh. DH doesn't really know where he wants to go. he's lived here his whole life, and never really thought of leaving. besides that, i tend to be the picky one his job field is so specific, unfortunately. this is really the only place that someone specializing in Drapery Installations and Motorization is in any kind of demand. (it comes with living in an area where people have too much money, and not enough common sense ) at the shop, he does sales for high-end decorative drapery hardware... so he could at LEAST get a job in retail sales, or something like that. his best bet will be a store like Best Buy, because he knows a lot about entertainment systems, and computer/video games. and i think, once we figure out where we're going/what we're gonna do, he'll prolly go to school, to study computer tech stuff. so long as we have a roof over our head, and food on the table, i don't care whose paycheck buys it. "luckily", we still weren't even done getting everything out of boxes from our last move (we moved into this place in april). ugh...

*whew!* sorry for the novel... i can't thank you chicks enough, for even just listening to me stress over this, much less for the helpful advice. if it weren't for this forum, i'd prolly be stuffing my face full of chocolate, or ice cream or something...

watch_it_break--what kind of shop do your inlaws have that they may have to close up?

alinnell: we sell high-end decorative drapery hardware, blinds, and shades - wholesale only, to interior designers and installers... and DH and his dad also do automation for shades/blinds, and do installs on the side.

unfortunately, more people are just going to retail home decor stores, like Home Depot Expo, and The Great Indoors for DIY stuff... and there's not been as much demand for motorization, either.

Well, if you DO decide to move back to WV, I know a place coming up for rent around Christmas time. Since we'll be closing on our house Friday and giving our notice here. LOL But honestly, the job market ain't that hot around here.

WATCH~IT~BREAK ~ There is an area in Washington state, southwest of Spokane called the Tri-Cities, Kennewick, Pasco and Richland. It is high desert, not as brutal as Spokane (guessing here) Spokane has 4 seasons accoeding to those I have talked to that lived there. Angie and I built a house there a couple of years ago to retire in, lived there one summer, came back home for the winter. I decided I wasn't ready to relocate just yet with my kids getting married and all. Anyway, we really liked the area, prices on homes are outstanding (for todays market), a growing area. We know several people in our area of Oceanside/Vista that have come from there for various reasons, some planning on returning at retirement.

NELIE~ We are cheaper here in Oceanside~Vista~Carlsbad still than Orange county...but not much!!

EZ - I think I mentioned it before but I am from Oceanside I really don't care for Northern Orange county much but there are some cheaper areas there to live that are pretty comprable to Oceanside/Vista.

Hey Nelie ~ I moved here with my family to start 7th grade...way back in '66...grew up by tri-city hospital. Always went to Vista schools though because of zoning. Angie and I live near Vista but still O'side. Off to Van Nuys to work...later...

watch_it_break--that's too bad that your in-laws business is suffering. I know what it's like, though, as DH and I own a business here in the desert. We do high end custom home window installations, nothing retail. At one time, we got into draperies, but that was more work than we wanted (and more of a headache than we imagined). We also did some automation, but now we just refer it out. We do the automation on sliding glass doors, though. It's amazing what rich people will pay for!
I wish you luck on finding a place to move. It's gotta be hard to just pack up and move and hope to find a job. Perhaps it might be prudent to search for the job first and then decide whether it is worth it to move there.

almostheaven: hehe... thanks i'm hoping we won't have to move THAT soon. then i'd REALLY be panicking! i know the job market isn't stellar over there. i lived in Huntington, WV, before moving to California... and i've got family in the tri-state area (Ohio, and Kentucky... near the WV border). family is the main reason i'd consider moving back, because at least we know people that we could stay with if we needed to, until we get back on our feet. my dad even said, if we ended up moving back, he could prolly help DH get a job at the steel mill... getting paid more than he's getting now! definitely keeping that option in mind.

EZMONEY: thanks for the suggestion... i'm starting a little list of places people have recommended, and what our options would be for those areas. feeling much better about everything, today... thank goodness.

alinnell: huh! i wonder if you ever worked with us... prolly worked with some of our designer customers, at least. idle curiosity, anyway thanks for the wellwishes, and the advice. if we end up moving somewhere, where we don't know anyone (ie, don't have anyone we could stay with if necessary), then we'll definitely do the job search first. otherwise, it just depends on what we can manage to do... after all, if we move too terribly far away, we can't afford to drive or fly back and forth for interviews. never had to do a long-distance job search, though, so i don't know how that would work... guess we may find out sooner than expected, eh?


general update - i'm feeling much better, after talking with friends and family, and getting a better idea of what options we have. and several people are helping me to look through job-search websites, for local jobs, and out of state... you have all been a GREAT help, both with suggestions, and in encouragement. just another reason for me to looooove this website, and the people on it. so now, we'll just have to see where this goes, as my in-laws ARE still trying to do whatever they can, to keep the place open... here's hoping!

Oh cool! Then it would work out so perfect. Since we live on the west end. LOL Getting ready to move to the other end of town though. Right now, just a hop and a skip to my brother's just over the bridge in OH, or his business over in KY, or my parents and daughter closer towards Charleston. Family's the reason we moved back...or I did. Hubby's never lived here before. His family's gone though, and while my family can be a pain, it's the only family there is left. He has two elderly aunts in NC, so that was a consideration. But they wouldnt' be around long. Here, our son has his big sister, grand parents and great grandparents, and aunts and uncles galore.

almostheaven: oh cool! someone from familiar territory! LOL well, i figure, if you have to move... it might as well be near family. at least, if that's a reasonable option. my family drives me nuts (my mom, mostly )... but we still love 'em. gotta admit, as ready as i was to get out of that area, i have missed it.

i may never admit that to them, though. even as a child, i always SWORE that i would leave, and never come back, except to visit. haha