So I was told my thread was deleted because some people found it offensive to be asking if i had a chance of being pregnant or not. WHO would think it's offensive? This place is really making me mad. It's a NATURAL PART OF LIFE! Ugh...I'm sorry but I just needed to vent. Some people have serious issues they need to deal with
Sorry. I guess since people can't be mature adults about this I won't bring up ANY issues...even if it IS weight-loss related. (someone i guess also said my thread shouldn't have been on here b/c it's not weight-loss related....UMMMM, ISN'T THAT WHAT 'GENERAL CHATTER' IS SUPPOSED TO BE ABOUT???? You might as well delete the American Idol thread...or anything else not diet-related.)
For such a supportive place, it sure isn't
This post better not be deleted. I have the right to state my opinions and have my voice heard!
Last edited by Danzer5570; 03-17-2006 at 07:12 PM.
Your second paragraph seems to suggest that you are mature ~~ but ~~ wasn't your topic on the question: "CAN I BE PREGNANT?"......SEEMS TO ME, IF YOU HAVE TO ASK THAT QUESTION, THEN MAYBE ~~ JUST MAYBE ~~ YOU HAVE SOME MATURING TO DO YOURSELF DEAR.
MY ADVICE: WAIT UNTIL YOU ARE MARRIED...YOU WILL SAVE YOURSELF A LOT OF TROUBLE.
I didn't see the thread that was deleted, but I can say that if we get several complaints about a thread, it will be removed. Reasons could include the topic or the direction a thread takes. If it causes more stress than support, then why encourage it? I'm speaking in general regarding deleted threads, not of your specific thread or topic. Since it appears that this thread is going wayward in a hurry, we may have to close this one.
Having said that - If you had sex, you could be pregnant. Your best bet is not to speculate, but to see your doctor for a pregnancy test and/or advice.
I didn't see the deleted thread, and I certainly agree with Suzanne that a doctor is the best person to consult if one thinks they could be pregnant. I don't know Heather at all, but I'm rather offended that a woman who seeks reassurance on a personal matter from her peers, or who feels entitled to make her own decisions regarding her own life, is called "immature" by a member of a support group. Sounds unhelpful and rather judgemental to me.
suzanne - i had sex, but it was protected. and just like a lot of people, i was a little apprehensive because my period was a couple days late. but i got it so...rest assured, i'm okay in that department! but basically that's all i talked about, and i just didn't understand what was so "offensive" about it...and what was so "off-topic" since this is a "general topic" area.
and if this post gets deleted i guess it's okay because i just wanted to get my point across. and i am not the only person that thinks removing posts like that is wrong...i've gotten several PMs from others agreeing with me...while only one (as you can see above) thinks I'M immature. But that's okay. just someone's opinion...which is what these boards are for.
and it kind of hurts that i came here for support from people i've been getting a lot of support from the past few months, then i just get walked on like that. i don't feel i should have to walk on egg shells here. and this was an important moment in my life, that i felt confident enough to share with everyone and seek support. i haven't even TOLD anyone else yet...i came here first. and then it just gets deleted and forgotten. it's very disappointing.
Last edited by Danzer5570; 03-17-2006 at 08:30 PM.
Heather, I don't think there was anything wrong with that post. I think it's good for you to be open about things like that. I know it can be hard some times to talk people close to you about it.
Stay here with us and if you need help about things like that you can send me a private message and ask anything you want . I'm not up tight about sex and I think it's good to have someone to talk to about things. I'm sure I'm not the only that would let you PM them just give it time you will make alot of friends.
You are a very smart and muture lady because you did wait !
I responded to the thread and was definitely not offended, but I can see that some may have been because of its explicit nature. That said, you really couldn't eliminate the details in order to fully explain and receive reassurance. Don't sweat it, Hon - you can't please everyone
Thanks plb and jillegal. It's a shame society makes us feel like sex is a bad thing that shouldn't be talked about. Plb I'll definitely PM you if I have any questions or would like support in the future. And the same goes for you!
Just for the record Heather, I thought your original thread was perfectly fine for General Chatter...I did feel that a lot of the advice you were given was not in your best interest...most of it appeared to be "you'll be fine ~ don't worry" not what I would tell a 20 year old young women in your position. I didn't object to your question on being pregnant at all...in fact I think this is a great place for advice....I just feel that most of the advice you got was unfortunate.
I had nothing to do with it being deleted!!
I am glad you were lucky this time...my married 24 year old neice just got pregnant from her husband...using a condom!....protected? hummm?
Personally I just felt that if you weren't mature enough to know if you could get pregnant in the manner you spoke of...that maybe you weren't mature enough to handle the consequences if they were not to your liking.
Thanks for the PM...seems a bit "snippy" for someone so mature though ~
Don't sweat it Heather. Like Hungry Monkey posted - you can't please everyone.
I got married when I was your age Heather and was fortunate enough to have a female co-worker 10 years older than myself who answered my numerous questions. I must have lost the instruction manual that came with my ovaries.
I don't think people were offended by you asking whether you could be pregnant or not. I think they may have been offended by the graphic nature of the post. People of all ages come on the board and some may have just been uncomfortable with it. I don't think it has anything to do with their maturity level or yours.
Also I don't think anyone was saying you or sex is "bad" or "dirty", it's just that not everyone is quite so open about such things.
One last thought about the maturity comment though, if you're trying to defend yourself it's probably not the best thing to start fights over the internet. People don't respect that and even so-so or sarcastic comments can come across very childish and mean.
I read the thread, it was deleted before I got to read the last couple of replies, which I did want to see.
I wasnt offended, this 20yo woman made a decision to do something something that maybe not all of us may follow, but from sounds of it she didnt fall into bed with someguy, she made a decion to be intimate with her bf and be safe as she thought possible (of course I have my own hang ups).
Human nature to worry and be concerned, if she was that concerned she may decide to take up the advice she recieved from the original post about the pill.
Doesnt mean she will, I personally wouldnt want to use it because of the problems associated with it, mainly from the older generations of the pill. I cant say Ive researched that a great deal as now I dont need it.
I don't think people were offended by you asking whether you could be pregnant or not. I think they may have been offended by the graphic nature of the post. People of all ages come on the board and some may have just been uncomfortable with it. I don't think it has anything to do with their maturity level or yours.
There may also have been people who objected on moral grounds to the idea of sex between unmarried people, and to the apparent approval of such by those who responded. Whether you agree with that stance or not, you must acknowledge that some people feel that way.
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One last thought about the maturity comment though, if you're trying to defend yourself it's probably not the best thing to start fights over the internet. People don't respect that and even so-so or sarcastic comments can come across very childish and mean.
That includes statements like "This post better not be deleted...".
anyone find this kind of funny...
