Gym Rant
 

Dear Fellow Gym Users:

Now, I know some of you think the other gym users are figments of your imagination. At least that's the only conclusion I can come to based on your behavior. As interesting as your little theory may be, it's wrong. We do exist and we have rights equal to yours.

So, when you decide to use the narrow flight of stairs to/from the locker room and/or to/from the main floor to do calf flex drop downs or to run & up and down them, you are inconvencing the folks who want to, you know use the locker room to get dressed/undressed, use the cardio equipment, weight equipment, etc. Here's a novel idea--you might want to use one of the step class steps instead of the steps for the flexes and cardio equipment for the running up & down. Or the stair climber or the steps. Plus as long as you don't hog that for extended periods of time, no one will bother you. None of those pesky folks wanting to use stairs to ascend/descend to the various floors of the gym!

A word about the circuit express area. It's designed for people who want to get in a quick workout with weights. If you want to check your blackberry or read the paper, kindly find another spot for that. And if you're going to do intense weight work, fine, but let the other gym users work in. And please keep the grunting/groaning & weight slamming to a minimum. First of all, you're using a machine, not free weights. So you look silly when you let the machine go like that as the machine's doing part of the putting the weights down work that you would normally be doing with free weights. And the machines are closer together. That means I can feel/hear the slamming, grunting & groaning more close up & personal than I can in other areas of the gym. For a moment there, Mr. grunter/screamer, I thought you were giving birth, based on the noises I heard over my ipod until I looked in your direction and realized that was biologically impossible due to your gender.

Fortunately, the cardio machine to user ratio is favorable when I go so no complaints about that.

Now for the locker room. First of all, use a lock. Sure, crime in NYC is down to historically low levels, but that doesn't mean someone can't/won't steal your stuff. Don't make it easy for them. Plus, having a lock on your locker allows me to see which ones are in use. I hate having to go through 4 lockers only to find out they're occupied while schlepping my stuff around. It almost makes me want to steal your stuff. And yes, we're getting changed/showered, so some nudity is inevitable. But could we please minimumize the gratuitious naked grooming? Thanks.

The showers have enough hooks so that if they're all occupied, everyone has 1 hook. Some of you seem to need to drape your stuff over 2, which sometimes means there's no space for other to hang their stuff and we have to find another stall. Then, some of you even put your stuff over your hook and my hook, right over my stuff. I then have to touch your stuff or wait until you finish. Again, I'm not a figment of your imagination, I exist.

Locker room benches/floors. Our gym is in midtown Manhattan. Real estate there is at a premium. Which means we don't have spacious/expansive locker rooms. I see some of you take up entire benches. Which would be ok if we were just your imaginary gym going friends. But we're not, we're real. We need space to put our stuff too. I notice a lot of you who do this are also towel princesses. Towel princesses have an issue with protecting their feet from the locker room floor with the mere flip flops most of us use. So they will spread a towel on the floor to protect their delicate flower feet. Of course, that means anyone who needs to get near a locker in that square footage area must either wait until the princess is good & ready or sully her pristine towel area. This am, a woman had taken over the entire bench with her stuff, had her Uggs on the floor (not standing up, but lying on their sides taking up as much room as possible) had a towel spread out on the floor near the Uggs and her sneakers nearby on the floor. I had about 2 inches of space to juggle my stuff. Of course, towel princesses often leave their towels behind because they've been contaminated by floor contact. So either other members or the cleaning lady have to pick them up. Personally, I'd like to take the towel princesses and dump them into large bins with all of their dirty towels. And heck, other people's dirty towels just for good measure! :)

Oh, and creepy guy walking by behind me- I CAN SEE YOU STARING AT MY BUTT IN THE WINDOW REFLECTION!

Also, just because you are a boy does not mean you have the right of way to all the weight training equipment at any moment it strikes you to use it. The rare occasion that I want to use the equipment, you make me feel like I am rummaging through your underwear drawer!

Other than that, I *heart* the Y :)

It's good to rant about this stuff from time to time. One of these days, I'm going to write an open letter to people that take public transportation :)

Dear Miss:

I realize that it must be exciting for you that you do, indeed, get cell phone reception in the gym. However, a treadmill is not just another portion of the floor. Standing on it, without running it, and chatting away on your cell phone loudly is not proper conduct. First of all... no one wants to hear about how your best friend "totally doesn't even get that the hottie at her work thinks she's cute" or that you went to the mall and got "these totally wicked boots for only $200.00". Second of all, if you can talk as fast as you can without getting winded- you obviously aren't exercising properly. Try turning the machine on. Even better- try using it. It might actually make the money you spent on your gym membership feel a little more "totally" worth it.

I haven't gone to a gym for a while but my favorites were...

Please mr smelly sweaty guy, wear deodorant. Also it would help if you had taken a shower in the past week. Feel free to wipe down that machine you just soaked as well.

Mr strange guy - I worry for you. Maybe you should rethink birkenstocks as your footwear of choice in the free weight section. You particularly scare me when you do squats. Also, I don't think that black trashbag you are wearing for your gym clothes is doing much for you.

Dear grunter - can you use your inside grunt voice please?

Dear girly girl - Yes I know you like make up, you wear plenty of it. I also know you like perfume, I can smell it 10 feet away. Also if you can afford those night club clothes you are wearing, maybe you can afford some gym clothes.

Amen Sisters!

Dear Mom: Please keep your kids off the equipment. I realize that our gym doesn't have a daycare, but perhaps you could make other arrangements for your children. Just because we have 24 hour access cards and no one checks us in doesn't mean you should bring the whole family for your workout.

Also guys getting on the weight machine after me I realize I am not as strong as you but do not sigh and roll your eyes when you have to increase the weights, it's rather annoying

Mom's bringing your kids to the pool, yes there are kids allowed at certain hours but keep them in the actual pool part not the lanes. They think it's fun to swim across the lanes instead of up and down them and me nearly having to kill myself to keep from hitting your kid kinda makes me mad

I've got a few pet peeves...

People who don't re-rack their plates. Sometimes I get a workout just unracking!

People who don't clean their cardio machines off when they're done. So I clean before and after.

People who turn the fan off without asking if you need it - when you were there first. Wear a jacket if you get easily chilled.

People who like their butt crack to show.

People who change the TV channel to the Food Network. Some of the programs are healthy, I know...

People who *reserve* their cardio machine before they go into their abs class...by put their jacket and water bottle on it, and finally come back 1/2 hour later.

Dear Best Forever Friends:

I know you like to work out together as it passes the time more quickly, but next time you decide to each take a treadmill at my left and my right and then proceed to have a 60 minute conversation over my head while walking at 2.0 miles an hour, could you at least talk about something more interesting than your stupid kids' soccer practice?

Jellydisney~ I've had people do that before, I got involved in the conversation. They don't like that :lol: They gave me a nasty look and it's like um you are talking around me, get over it :dizzy:

Also, friends that jelly was talking about don't look as if I inconveinienced you by being here. It's not my fault that you got here later than I did. Just enjoy your work out

And friends, please don't ask me in the middle of my workout to find another machine to use so you can workout next to eachother.

Apparently there is some sort of plague of people thinking the other gym goers are figments of their imagination at the gym I go to. At least it was restricted to the locker room today.

One woman (different from yesterday) had her stuff spread out all over the bench & was standing directly in front of my locker. I had to say excuse me to get to my locker. And she moved nothing off the bench so that I might possibly be able to put something there. So I had to put my make up bag back into my backpack while juggling it with my pocketbook and my little shower caddy (I rent a smaller locker assigned to me to store that stuff & my workout clothes/sneakers) all within the confines of my gym locker, the floor beneath it.

There was another woman nearby doing seated leg stretches on the locker room floor, meaning people who needed to get to the lockers near her had to step around her. The gym has not one, but two areas where one can stretch. They're padded & towels are plentiful if one is squeamish about contacting the padded mats. They even have spray you can use to clean. But apparently, she'd rather stretch on the carpet the towel princesses are freaked out by and which gets wet when the locker room occasionally floods during bad summer rainstorms. It takes days of fans going full blast all day to dry them out.

HOWL!!!

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

This is exactly why I joined 24 Hour Fitness... and why I go after midnight. BEST time to workout, if all of the above bugs you (and it sure does bug me) to the point of distraction.

Of course, if you can't avoid the rant-worthy behaviors, you can always (at least I tell myself this) find a way to USE the anger to have a more intense workout. ;)

Ditto on the keeping your kids away from equipment. At least 3 times I almost smashed a small child's hand when they ran over and stuck their fingers in the mechanisms of my elliptical...if I wasn't watching like a hawk, I'm pretty sure someone'd lose a finger. Mom was standing right there, but not watching. Ugh.

:rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl: Tears rolling down my cheeks reading this one!

I don't belong to a gym now . . . but I did once and boy do I remember these dingdongs. As my age has increased my tolerance for ignorance, stupidity and incompetence has decreased. Greatly. And as my age has increased so has the speed at which my thoughts fall out of my mouth and into said ignorant/stupid/incompetent person's face. :rollpin::) I've come to the conclusion that if said individual is ignorant or stupid or rude enough to be doing these things than I am justified in bringing it to their attention. They'll thank me for it some day. :) Had I been in the locker room w/towel princess or stretch lady you can bet I would of moved her stuff and tripped over them. And I'd be as oblivious as they are and just go about my buiness. I am always amazed at how extremely oblivious and self-absorbed some people can be. Really makes you wonder!

Wow! I'm so sorry you ladies have to deal with that kind of stuff.

I think if I had to put up with this kind of boorish behavior that my heart rate would go up just from the aggravation! :tantrum:

This just reaffirms my belief that I'm better off working out at home! :^:

:lol3:

The benches you see around the gym are for exercising. They aren't rest benches and they also aren't places to store all your stuff--there's actually a locker room for that.

Ladies, I know we are delicate flowers that aren't suppose to sweat but please wear deoderant, especially if you plan on sitting in the sauna after your workout.

Please don't smoke just outside the door of the gym. Hello, we're all exercising in here.

Please don't steal the hooks off the sauna wall. Honestly, you can buy your own hooks next door at the drugstore for a couple of $.

Please don't leave the door of the sauna open. Your mom doesn't work at the gym; close the door behind you.

It's great that you can lift the 45 lb weights (although I do wish you could do it with less grunting), but please remove them from the machines when you are done. Again, you're mom doesn't work at the gym (and, even if she did, she'd probably would have as much trouble removing those weights as I do).

Mr. old hairy guy with the less than ideal body, please wear a shirt that covers your torso, rather than one that hangs open on the sides from the shoulders to the waist. Ick.

I *heart" this thread!

I know this may sound crazy but all the things you guys hate about the gym are what keeps me going back. The gym is a hilarious place! I'll also chime in though.

1) I hate when people don't wash their grubby feet and I'm stuck in yoga looking at your grimy, dingy feet.

2) People who take up lanes in the pool who aren't doing laps! If you lounging, get in the jacuuzi!

3) The people who insist on putting hella water in the steam room thingy. All it takes is a little.

4) The lasdies that walk aroung butt-a** naked in the locker room but I'm getting used to that.....

Dear Mr. Buff Guy:

We all can see your muscles. REALLY, we can. So it is not necessary for you to put on draws/underwear for shorts and then baby oil up before you put 400 pounds worth of weight on the bar, do one squat, grunt extremely loud, and then look at yourself in the mirror. :strong:

And Bally's is not a Mr. Olympia pageant, so leave the baby oil at home next time.

I work in a gym/athletic club...and you are SO right, the gym IS a hilarious place! My husband is also a member, and boy, does he tell me stories as well!

Our pet peeves:

Yes, you are going to see some nudity in a locker room/shower area. This is to be expected. However, the nudity should be brief, and it should be only when necessary: undressing and dressing before/after showering or your workout. Brief.

My husband told me that in the men's locker room, that he witnessed a man in front of the mirrors/sink naked-putting gel in his hair. In my husband's words...this guys "stuff" was resting on the countertop/sink area. This is the same area where other people are going to CLEAN their hands!

:barf: :barf: barf:

He said another man in the locker room was standing there completely naked, watching the television. Umm.... :?: Just STANDING there!!!

I have seen women brushing their hair or teeth, or putting on makeup, or drying their hair NAKED. Umm...put your clothes on first please, or at least wrap a towel around yourself, especially if you bend over during blow drying to give your hair extra volume. :o Nobody wants to see that view...

This thread is HYSTERICAL! I love it... :dance:

Personal fave -

"inside grunting voice please" and the "Hellooo...I can see you looking at my butt!!!"


Thank you!

OMG! It took me a minute to figure out what you meant. (I was thinking "stuff" meant his gel or container of hair products or whatever.)

I seriously laughed out loud once I realized "stuff" meant STUFF! His JUNK! His bits!

Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

That's hilarious!

And gross.

Wow!!!!!!!!!

LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL

Oh my!

Thanks for reaffirming my commitment to exercising at home :lol:

All this is reaffirming my decision to be a Curves member. All women, no locker rooms, and small facilities where everyone's doing the same program make all the difference.

The "inside grunting voice" totally cracked me up.
Just yesterday, I was in the gym and there was a guy close by and if I did not know otherwise, I would have thought he was in labour. For some reason, I simply could not refrain from laughing so I moved myself to a distant part of the floor (I did not want to offend his sensitive soul). :D

This vent applies to both gyms and public places. If you are disgusted easily, refrain from reading.

Dear lovely Gucci girl

Yes, you with the perfect hair-style and the cute little outfit. It is great going to the toilet isn't it? Such a great facility, especially on those days of the month. And yet, despite your elegance you forget something.

How to flush! I know you are from a nice family, yet like all of us common mortals your excrements are not rose-petals neither rose-oil. I fail to understand why you would leave them floating in the bowl, staring back at me as I enter. I simply do not understand why you have this urge to fill the bowl with hips of toilet paper without flushing. And furthermore, I do not understand what your sanitary towel is doing outside the bin.

Before you whine "But I flushed once and they did not go down. Why should I wait?" I answer this. Wait and flush again because neither the other users or the cleaning ladies are forced to clean your messes. And no we don't feel a privilege to do so. Just because your mother is not the cleaning lady; and just because the cleaning lady is paid to clean, this does not mean you should act as if you were born in a pigsty. So flush! It is only a button away!

PS: I entered 4 toilets today. 3 needed to be flushed and 1 was clogged by heaps of toilet paper. Sheesh!!!

Thank you Prettylady for bringing this one back up. I needed the laugh. We have a chick who leaves her toilet paper protection all over the seats in the outhouse we have at work. If you don't think your butt shouldn't touch the seat, what makes you think I should clean up the leavings that your butt's been on. And, this is a Freaking Mine for pete's sake. I don't want my butt there either. That's why I hover if I have to use them. And guy's, don't leave dribbles everywhere. A quick wipe down isn't tough. Now you know why I hover.

As far as children go. My children have known how to behave in public and respect the others around them from an early age. They have gone to decent restaurants since they were 3 or 4. They have gone to nice restaurants since about 10. I have always received compliments on their behavior b/c the waitresses and other patrons appreciate a mother and father who pay attention to their offspring and insure they do not intrude on the enjoyment of others. As soon as I would even suspect inappropriate behavior coming on, out to the car we went. Only had to happen once for the point to be made clear. Not only are the other folks around paying good money to have a pleasant evening, so were their mom and dad.

Please folks, if you can't handle that much parenting, hire a babysitter to keep the little darlings at home. Honestly, it will not intrude on junior's personal freedom of expression for him/her to learn to respect the people around them and they won't be scarred for life if they are removed from a restaurant/grocery store/gym/etc. for getting out of line.

Therefore, I have no qualms whatsoever with looking straight at a brat that I might encounter in public throwing a hissy fit and asking very loudly if it actually has a parent or just crawled out from under a rock, while giving it's parent a clear look of disgust. I'm with Hat Trick, I'm just to old for that crap.

Oh, yeah, I just remembered...The supervisor at our local rec center did let my youngest work out in the adult area that required a min. age of 16 when she was 13 b/c he knew she knew how to behave.:s: Guess I did something right.

My peeves at the gym:

1) People who do not wipe down their equipment afterward. Please. This IS the military, the people who 'work' here are typically volunteer or underpaid Japanese contractors, and you are EXPECTED to clean up behind yourself. The military even provides handy little wipes close to every machine and weight system in the place. No one wants to use a machine that is covered with someone else's sweat.

2) Wear deoderant. I really do not feel like upchucking my breakfast all over the treadmill due to smelling you would be received well by the people who 'work' here or the other exercisers.

3) Do not assume simply because I'm overweight and I'm leaving after you've only been there 20 minutes that I am somehow unconcerned about my weight. I do not need your 'helpful' advice, because lady, I just put in at least an hour and a half/two hours of doctor-advised exercise at the gym while you were sleeping in.

4) If you bring your child and use the parent/child training room, by all that is holy WATCH your child and PAUSE your machine if your child is being unruly! Lady, your 4 year old son scared me half to death almost falling on his head climbing over the barricade in front of my treadmill!

I don't use the lockers or the showers so I can't speak about those.

I work at a fitness center. I used to do the cleaning, but now I'm at the front desk.

People, please have your card ready for swiping by the time you get in the door (maybe take a second before you get out of your car?). Remembering to bring it at all would help too.

Pick up your dirty towels and put them in the bin that's an arm stretch away. Don't leave your razors, empty shampoo bottles, used tampons/pads in the showers please.

Oh yeah, don't poop in there either.

Oh yes, and WHY oh WHY must you use so many towels? One for each foot on the floor, one for lining the counter to put your makeup on, at least 2 or 3 for your shower. Add this to your 7 children (this IS Utah) and OMG. There are people making $7.00 an hour that have PLENTY of things to do around here without all those extra towels (this club provides the towels).

Don't bring your young boys into the women's dressing room! No, they are NOT too young to know...

Hmmm...the athletic club where I work has a rule about little boys in the ladies locker room. They have to be 4 and under...

There was a mom who routinely brought her son - maybe 6 - into our locker room. VERY AWKWARD. He stood and stared...

Hey, Shooting Star!!! I'll meet you in Evanston to get some real fireworks.:devil:

Yeah my pet peeve is young boys in the women's locker room too.

I actually think that the gratuitous naked women do tend to keep that to a minimum but then I would rather that they do what they need to quickly and put on some clothes.

We're lucky usually the kids are there to either got to the Kid's club, climb the rock wall, or use the pool. Which for me thankfully means that they are not in my way.

Once I reach my goal weight I might try that rock wall it does look like a blast.

i cant believe people do that! i have a child and i would never bring her to the gym with no daycare

Yesterday, I went to the local indoor pool to swim laps. While changing into my suit in the locker room (discreetly and quickly), a little girl stood and stared at my tush, pulled on her mommy's pant leg and said "Look at her butt! Look!" The mom said nothing and just continued shoving stuff in her locker.

I know it's a public pool and public locker room, but come on parents! Have a 2-minute conversation with your kid in the car about locker room ettiquette. This is basic courtesy and your child deserves to be taught about decorum.