Granted..but while on vacation you get shipwreaked and have to live your life out on a tiny island with a bunch of strangers.

I wish we could nab the loser who stole my husband's iPod.

Granted...But it turns out the loser who stole it dropped it in a puddle and cracked the screen.

I wish I had a sexy new car. Vroom vroom!

Granted but it has no engine or tires.

I wish I had a new washing machine!

Granted, but your new washing machine is Barbie sized..

I wish I could have a better vertical jump.

Granted, but your jump only increases by 1/2 an inch.

I wish I had slender fingers.

Granted! You now have fingers like Nosferatu.

I wish I could get my car fixed this week.

Granted, but now you cant drive to due to all the roads in your town being flooded with 4 feet of water.

I wish my boss would shut his trap!

Granted, but now you have to try and understand all his hand gestures.

I wish I could fall asleep.

Granted!

But now you find yourself always tired

Not sure what the wish was, but um... Granted! And then ants show up at the picnic!

I wish I could see into the future.

Granted but you can only see milliseconds into the future...

I wish I could grow my hair on command (kind of like the barbies back then where you could pull more hair out LOL)

Granted, but it all grows in the wrong colors!

I wish I could fly!

Granted, but now there's more traffic, meaning you'll take longer to get to places and use more gas anyways.

I wish that I would make my End of September goal.

Granted, but it will be the end of September 2012.

I wish someone would pay my son's college tuition.

granted but he ends up with a degree in Queer Musicology from UCLA


i wish i had sparkling white teeth