Hi all.
I've gone back to eating an average of 1500 calories a day. That is the level where I feel my best, have energy and don't have cravings. However when I'm around people who are eating much less than me I start feeling like a greedy pig with no willpower. And then I feel fat even though I know I'm not.

Take Dh as an example. Since I've known him he has always had a very small appetite. He rarely eats breakfast or lunch. Usually he has a small snack mid-afternoon and then dinner, which half the time he doesn't finish. Sometimes he has another snack in the evening. He's not thin; for a guy he has a wicked slow metabolism and health issues that prevent him from getting much exercise. He tells me he just doesn't feel hungry during the day and I believe him. But I can't help comparing my calorie intake with his. I guess it's ingrained in my head that a woman is supposed to eat less than a man even if the man in question hardly eats.

Then there are two woman at work. One woman, who was laid off from a different department last winter was recalled into my department last week. While she was laid off she lost sixty pounds. Sixty pounds since last February!
When I'm not working I tend to gain weight. She told me she never eats breakfast and has a can of plain tuna and a glass of V8 juice for lunch.

Another woman, in a different department, runs every day at lunch instead of eating . I look at them and think, there's something wrong with me because I don't have their willpower. (Oh and let's not forget my uber tiny friend Karen who often forgets to eat at all and is currently hovering at ninety pounds.) I know we're all different and that what works for one person might not work for another but I can't help comparing myself to them.

Can anyone relate?

Hi Magrat,

I can relate! I eat quite frequently -- once every three hours, or approx 5-6 times every day. And I would never dream of skipping a meal. My coworkers tease me a little bit about it, but it's what works for me. You have had such a amazing success, so what you are doing must be working! I would just have confidence in that. And, food is not the enemy -- eating healthy, filling foods throughout the day will keep our bodies happy and our metabolisms fired up.

I love to eat, and I love food. I love cooking it and consuming it...

I would feel very deprived if I skipped breakfast or lunch. Even if I didn't feel hungry, I'd feel left out! Look at all those people that get to eat ALL THE TIME!

You should be proud of yourself for listening to your body (and for sticking to what is a fairly restrictive calorie plan!). And maybe... Your friends could stand to benefit from eating a bit more. A lot of people have a lot of hidden conflicts with their food, and you can't always see that from the outside.

Personally I've never understood how someone can just forget to eat- I love food so trying to figure this out just leaves me stumped......if I can be quite honest, when I hear that I think it's often an excuse, that possibly there is a problem.....I could be way off the mark, don't mean to offend you or your friend- just a thought.

I can see what you mean about feeling like you should eat less that a man, I have that ingrained in me, too. Look at it this way, although you may eat more and eat more often- you're eating smarter and you are more than likely much healthier on the inside in comparison to your other half and your work friends etc... I have a female friend who is about 5'8 and 112 lbs, she is very slender as you can imagine.....this woman never eats any set meals, she eats when she is hungry, she lives on junk food, I'm talking about cans of Beefaroini, fast food, beer and cigarettes *gags*......and while she may be much more slender in comparison to myself, I would bet my life I'm much healthier. Don't beat yourself up, 1500 is a good amount, in my eyes. Those around you should take a leaf out of your book. Btw, a massive congratulations on being so close to goal!!!