I know EXACTLY what you mean about being self conscious because you're not married yet...
I used to weigh 265 pounds but for some reason I ALWAYS thought when I got married I'd be strutting around in skimpy lingerie, etc...lol....it never occured to me that I didn't have the body for that!
Now I have lost 79 pounds and while I still don't look like a Victoria's secret model, I am much happier and feeling much more self confident.......I do not even come close to looking like those models do, but here's the way I see it...
My fiancee fell in love with me when I weighed 265 pounds and he had NO IDEA I was considering having weight loss surgery. He loved me the way I was! Now that I am 187 it can only get better right?
As for the excess skin, I am working out a lot and not noticing any loose skin yet. I am going to keep working my butt off and hopefully I won't have to worry about it. You are right, they say since we are pretty young (I'm 26) and haven't had babies yet we should be able to tone up pretty well.
God bless you on your weight loss journey!