I have a client in my boot camp class who is perpetually defeated by his own mind. I spend the bulk of my time with him trying to motivate him to just get over it. He spends the bulk of his time coming up with excuses why he "can't" push himself harder.

For instance, today we ran two 1.5 mile stretches with a "break" that included 10 sets of 10 different push ups in between. He has done WAY more than that in the past, but today, he stopped to walk halfway through his 2nd part of the run. He is 41, 6'1" and about 195 lbs. He has been a boot camp regular for 6 years.

I actually told him today, "If I can just snap your head off, your body would be able to do this exercise." To which he replied, "I'd like to snap your head off!" and we both laughed.

Anyone got a good motivational speech I can use?

So many of our limitations are in our mind. When I was doing to C25K program, I practiced positive self talk the whole time, otherwise I surely would have quit because "I can't do this. I am going to die." was my constant inner mantra. So I had to change that. I picked a new mantra, one of my son's football coaches lines "Want some? Get some!!" Suggest finding a mantra and every time the "I can't do this" comes to mind, he can replace it with something positive. Also, does he have a goal in mind? That helps immensely. Since he likes bootcamps, maybe he would like to do something like a Warrior Dash. And finally, ya know some days just suck. On Monday, I ran four miles like it was nothing. On Wednesday, I struggled the entire way through the same run. Maybe because I started the run hungry, maybe because I have hardly slept in days, maybe because I ran earlier than normal. Who knows? But I had to stop and walk several times, something I never allow myself to do. Yes, I have done this run and know I can do this run on a normal day, this day, just something was off. As a trainer, I think you have to keep in mind that even though you know someone is capable of doing something because they have done it before, there are a lot of factors that can make the same workout that was a moderate challenge the day before, a major feat the next day.

Aimee, I totally get what you're saying because I experienced that first hand. This was not one of those times. he was self defeated in mind. Yes there were minor physical limitations (i.e. a stitch in his side that he admitted had gone away) but no nausea, injury or ...it doesn't matter. Experienced trainers are pretty good at smelling B.S.

I really like the idea of him making up his own mantra. I will do that for the entire class.

Oh, I am sure you can detect BS. I didn't mean to imply that you didn't. I think I was trying to forgive myself for yesterdays half-@ss effort I put out when I posted that! LOL It's easy to see if the same guy, who you know is physically capable of more, is giving into the mental BS he is feeding himself day after day. I swear it's 75% mental. "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right."

If I have other stuff going on that is hard to deal with, I find it harder to keep my head in the game. He probably is giving you excuses, not real reasons, but could it be due to hard times at home? You say he's been a regular for years-but maybe now something is the matter. Or has he always been like this? Maybe he needs some specific goals to reach of his choosing? I know boot camps probably aren't personalized, but if it would get through to him a bit, maybe he could work at doing something he wants to accomplish on his personal time. Like, so you could show him-by doing x boot camp workout, it helps x muscle and will help you to be better at whatever it is he wants to do. I am not a personal trainer, and know nothing about your profession, so if I'm way off base, sorry. Good luck!

He's an adult, and you're not playing the role of Jillian on TBL. I think at some point you back off the psych-ops.

I respectfully have a different opinion.

Sometimes working out is more about overcoming the mental obstacles rather than the physical. I appreciate the trainers I've had that were invested enough in me as a client to take the time to help me through my mental weaknesses/blocks- especially when I was just letting myself down. Two trainers that I worked with in the last few years helped me to push past an internal message that I was "weak" and couldn't do it. I was wrong...they were right, and I came out of it with more confidence in myself.

I do think Jillian is a little extreme (haha- it's way over the top sometimes, but that's what makes good TV), but in all reality, I think it's absolutely a trainer's job to help clients break through physical and mental barriers to fitness. I didn't get the sense that the original poster was trying to dive into clinical psychotherapy with her client, just trying to help someone who was not reaching his potential.

I'll never forget breaking a 9:00 minute mile for the first time since I was 18 (I'm 28 now). My trainer pushed me through it, and I did it. I'm glad she was tough on me when I wanted to throw in the towel!

I agree.

To the OP, maybe he just doesn't want to go full throttle, and you know what? There's nothing wrong with that. I used to take a bootcamp class, too, and I used to push myself as much as I wanted to push myself. At that time, I didn't want to focus on my diet; I just wanted to get back into exercising. The instructor was friendly, and I liked her, but she would always make comments to me about getting back on the stick with my diet. Frankly, after a while, it got on my nerves, and I stopped going to that class.

I'm a teacher, so I know all about trying to motivate others. However, there is a fine line between friendly, concerned motivation and butting in. I'm not saying that you're doing the latter. However, you may want to consider whether you are or not. People are different, as you can see from the feedback on this thread. Some folks like the extrinsic motivation of others but others do not. We're all different, and I think it's important to keep that in mind. (ETA: For example, frankly I cannot stomach Jillian. I would probably pig out on that show just to get kicked off and not have to hear her. Others love her. Again, different strokes).

I agree with this!

I'm a teacher too, and knowing how to motivate students is a daily learning experience! It is important to recognize what specific students need- and a good trainer can do that with his/her clients. I respond well to being pushed. My DH does not. We have different needs. If I ever needed my trainer to back off, I told her, and she would. We were lucky to have that kind of rapport.

I'm also glad to read I'm not the only person who finds Jillian to be over the top...haha.

Cool opinions!

A little more background: The previous boot camp teacher asks me how he's doing because he was a complainer 5 years ago. She and I agree that he's at a point where he needs a personal trainer.

This being a group exercise class, I know it is NOT my role to be the Jillian-type trainer. However, it being a boot camp class, it's my role to push people harder than say, Zumba class.

We dissected this WAY more than the original Q was asking for.

So back to that Q: What saying/thoughts motivate you to push harder when you want to stop? Where did they come from - someone else or that little voice inside?

When I need to motivate my client I just get behind her and say :

" C'mon, c'mon, C'MON, ONE MORE... YOU CAN DO THIS!! MOVE!!! MORE ONE MORE!! .... See told you you could!! It's all in your head, I know you have it in you!! " ....

This usually works... but she's not that hard headed...

Agreed! If you are participating in a bootcamp, I would think you would be expecting and wanting some hard core push yourself type training.

I agree - its boot camp, meaning hard work.

I have a trainer who actually used to run beside me when I felt like giving up. He would do so to encourage me to keep moving and one of the things he normally said which I use even now is "It's mind over matter, it's mind over matter".

True--but who's to say he isn't working as hard as he wants to work? As I mentioned before, too much pushing can make someone stop altogether (which, again, happened to me). He is paying for the class, after all, so it's ultimately his decision how hard he wants to push himself. Although to be fair, he's a big boy and should be able to tell the instructor to back off (maybe he likes the attention ).

Nevertheless, to the OP, I think you are a good instructor to be so concerned about one student. I'm sure that you're doing all you can to motivate everyone in the class, and it speaks to your humility that you are seeking advice about how to reach the one "lost sheep" in the group. Just keep in mind that, again, not everyone wants to be pushed. Even if you can't motivate everyone, though, the class as a whole is lucky to have such a concerned instructor.

I like that one I may use it next time on my client...