[timmyshawn]

Hi I'm a 29 yo SAHM of 3, married to a wonderful man. I was diagnosed several years ago with clinical depression but was rediagnosed about a year ago with bi polar disorder. I have been on so many different meds that I feel like I could work in a pharmacy. After this last go around with about 7 different meds in a month, (they were trying to find a combo that worked well) I said forget it and began reading up on everything I could about the disorder and have learned how to recognize my shifts and deal with them on my own with out the meds. Most of the time. I know I am in a downward shift right now and i feel the depression setting in and I'm trying so hard to stay up but with all these diet changes, routine changes (a set routine has been a big help in dealing with the shifts and staying in control), etc..I am starting to feel out of control and the depression is coming. My PCP won't prescibe meds for the bi polar (not that I want to go through that mess again anyway). he wants me under "clinical care" for that but I find that going to the psycholgist or psychiatrist aggrivates me and makes things worse. All they do is want to talk about what's wrong and don't seem to believe you when you say I don't know, there's not really anything wrong I just feel down right now. Then they tell me things to do to make it better, like I haven't already tried these things and if they worked why would I be there and then try to pump me full of pills. I don't know what to do. Hubby tries his hardest to be supportive but he doesn't understand (and has admitted this) and he gets frustrated. I feel like no one understands and that makes it worse too. I know it's part of the cycling but last week I felt so great like I was on top of the world and now I feel like...I don't know...so sad and hopeless. Hopeless about losing weight, about ever fixing all the things wrong with our house, money....everything. I have lost all my energy. I don't even want to get off the couch during the day to clean up the house, shower, cook, anything. And if it weren't for the kids I probably wouldn't. They are my driving force. I can't let them know or see how I feel or hubby either. He's a wonderful man but it only upsets him when I get like this so I am doing my level best not to let him know, so it stays all bottled up. I'm sorry this is so long but I just needed to get this out. I hope I haven't upset anyone. Thanks for "listening". I look forward to meeting ya'll and hopefully making some new friends.

[Leenie]

WELCOME HEATHER
Hope you'll join us on the daily thread

[ryzmom]

Heather! I am so sorry I didn't see your post ystdy. How are you doing today, any better?

I have been where you are SO many times, SO often. it took me a vverrryy long time to find the right meds, the right therapist. it works for some but not for all, sometimes it just helps to have someone to talk to. My couch was getting a big dent in it, I was spending so much time there. I know it's tough, especially when there are little ones, but they are what make the world go 'round. my ds has literally "saved" me from hitting rock bottom more times than I care to count, simply because he was a responsibility I could not escape. Thank goodness!

Oh gosh, I'm rambling, please let us know how you are today.

[cathyxxx]

Hey Heather!

it is nice to meet you! I'm kind of in the middle of dealing with all this Hurricane Rita stuff down here in Louisiana, but I noticed your post and wanted to encourage you to read the info I posted under the "Depression Articles" posted here under the "Depression and Weight Issues", especially the 3rd page at:

http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/show...6&page=3&pp=15

where I shared info about the connection between bipolar and thyroid problems.

If you are like me (and many others) you have been told many times over the years that your "thyroid is normal" but unfortunately, most docs are simply running the TSH which can easily miss the problem. The need to run the Free T3, Free T4 and antibodies tests, which are much more accurate. All of the info is there in those threads, but I just wanted to encourage you to at least thoroughly check out your thyroid and make sure it is not causing the problem.

I cannot tell you how many stories I have heard just like yours, and they ended up finding out they actually have a thyroid problem and do much better on a T3/T4 combination like Armour Thyroid.

I don't mean to butt into your business but wanted to at least share the info with you. Please let me know if I can help in anyway.

take care,
Cathy

[timmyshawn]

Thank you all for the encouragement and support. I am doing a little better today. At least I haven't actually cried today, just almost, so that's an improvement. Rzymom you are so right about the couch. You can tell where I sit cause the cushion there is worn down and the rest aren't. Cathy I am so sorry to hear that you are dealing with the aftermath of Rita. We were hit here 2 years ago by a pretty nasy one (though not as nasty as Rita) and it messed things up around here pretty bad. Some areas still have families in FEMA trailors trying to get their lives together. We were one of the lucky families and got minimal damage. The worst thing we had to deal with was no power or water for 2 1/2 weeks. I hope everything is going ok for you under the circumstances and I'll keep you in my thoughts, send ya some good energy. I have had my thyroid checked several times, though I don't know what kind of test my doc did, and have been told everything's normal ,but I'm going t ogive them a call and find out what test they did. Thanks for the info. Well I'm going to try to go back to bed. It's been a sleepless night so far. Only about 30 min of sleep and I have to be up in about 3 1/2 hours. I'll talk to ya'll later. ANd thanks again.