Hello,

My conundrum is this: I realize that being the way I am, I will have good days and bad days, but lately, I just can't shake it. I am so down on myself, esp.with my weight loss. I can either eat great or work out fantastic, never both. When I eat something sweet, it turns into a hardcore binge, and then I feel even worse.

I wonder if I'm even looking to the right goal, or if I'm being unrealistic. It's like a vicious cycle. You stop doing something because you no longer care, but since you no longer care, it's even harder to pick it up again, like exersize.

Before, I was so disciplined. I went from 220-145. I have no idea what I weigh now, becuase I haven't looked. Probably around 150-55, since that's where it generally is. I feel so much like a failure because I always sabotage myself at this point, when I'm starting to see positive changes in my body/mind.

I've tried to substitute my "naughty" snacks with stuff like yogurt, but I cannot make myself like yogurt. It may be good for me, and all that, but I cannot do it.

What happenned to me? I've tried therapy for my various issues, but never got much out of it. It's like I know what to do, but I can't do it, after two weeks I fall off the wagon, gain the weight back, and start over. It's getting old.
I'm watching so much of my carbs/fats/cals/sugars, that I feel like I'm eating cardboard. I no longer enjoy much food.

Granted, my problems may not be that way, it could be because I am having yet another bad day, but I just wonder if anyone can relate, or offer some suggestions?? I'm out of options and running out of hope. It may seems like such a paltry sum of lbs for many people. But I've been hanging onto it for three years, same damn cycle of two weeks on, gain it, two weeks on, gain...it's getting old.

I've tried to get myself busy with other things I can do, like projects, crafts, but I'm not good at anything. I really have no real talents to absorb myself in. I guess it's been going on for so long that I wonder if this is all worth it, or if I'm just wasting my time.

Hi AND welcome

Looks like you have gotten forgotten down there,,,,,,,,come on up to the top and most of all come join us on the daily thread.........there are lots of ups and downs there and believe me it is nice to have such a great group of gals to hang out with.

Hope to see you again.

Liz

Hey alteaon,

you sound like a lot of us here - like you are really hard on yourself. I don't think that gaining 10 lbs after losing that huge amount of weight makes you a failure at all! NOT AT ALL!

but I can understand you being concerned if the scale is creeping up - and you don't want to let it get out of control - I certainly understand that! and you are doing the right thing to not let it go any further.

You mentioned substituting yogurt for the naughty snacks and not liking the yogurt - well now girlie - you have got to find something that you do like. I wouldn't be able to make myself substitute the naughty stuff for the stuff I don't like either.

Why don't you join us on the daily thread! and if you would like you can join a few of us on the weekly food log - maybe you would feel better if you were "accountable" to posting what you were eating? I know it helps me out knowing that if I put something in my mouth I'm gonna have to show it and count it.

Hope you're feeling better today!

hugs,
cathy

I would like to join you too.. but where is the daily thread?

Alteaon, its so good to see you again.

Sorry for the late post, I've been so busy at work and trying to catch up on all the posts on the weekend.

Please come join us on the dailys

I can be my own worst enemy too....and I am my toughest critic. Lately I've been *training* myself when I want to eat something extra....I ask myself, "Do I REALLY want it?" 9 out of 10X the answer is no.....