Hi all,

I’m at a point in life where I want to date with purpose. I desire marriage and children at this point in my life. Being overweight controls many aspects of how I approach dating and my interactions with men. For example, I avoid making eye contact to express my interest, always assume men are repulsed by me, and don’t go out to meet new people. No serious relationships for me, just situationships that either fizzled out or I left due to major incompatibilities. I want to get to a point where I’m more secure in the fact that some men are in fact interested in me. I want to not over analyze whether a man is trying to use me because I’m not skinny/has some type of weight fetish. What should I do to calm the fears and anxieties I have surrounding dating as an overweight woman?

Confident and move forward. I believe you will be interested in someone, good luck!

So I've yo-yo'd with my weight all my life. I went from size 18 as a freshman in high school to a size 4 by senior year. Similar thing in undergrad and grad school... I met my husband in grad school. Ended up getting fit while we were together, we got married, had a baby... and then because of a medical disorder that went unchecked, I ballooned up to almost 300 lbs.

The point of me sharing that is I was happy that when he first met me, I was at the start of my weight loss journey. Sure, I got to end up being supa sexy tiny-weenie at one point only to gain so much weight and have a 10lb baby born as a "premie"... but it sort of gave me peace of mind knowing he loved me for me regardless of what the scale read.

Something else I noticed, as great as the attention is when you can rock a tiny bikini or daisy dukes, I found myself super picky about the men I dated whenever I was smaller, because I knew most of them would not have given me-me, my personality, even friendship-the time of day.

Insecurities will always be there regardless your size. Like the poster said above me, at the end of the day what matters is being confident, loving yourself and finding someone who loves you for you--irrespective of your size.

how is your dating life these days? Dating can be really tough when you’re dealing with low self-esteem or health concerns. I try to focus on meeting people who genuinely share my interests and values. Using Taimi https://taimi.com/blog/green-flags-f...relationships/ has helped me connect with people without overthinking every small thing. Just being honest, patient, and kind to yourself goes a long way. Don’t stress too much — the right people notice your personality more than anything else. It’s better to take it slow than force something that doesn’t feel right.

SPAM LINK inside!