I'll have to try this Holly.


I would probably put some kind of meat in it.

Hello EVERYONE! OMG I have missed you all. I am back! I haven't been able to log on in ages. I think my settings at work on my computer were changed, hence my absence! I've missed being here so much. Things have been a mess. I've managed to gain back 40 pounds from my lowest weight thus far. ugh.
A lot of various stressors going on at the moment in my life, but will fill you guys in when I have more time. I'm just glad to be back!

Jesika,it is soooo good to see you post. We have missed you very much.

Come back soon.

I went back to my Dr on Monday for a follow up visit. I'm doing pretty well. She gave me a simple exercise to help strengthen up my legs. I still can't walk very far, my legs get weak.

They weighed me and since my last visit on Nov 6th, I've lost 12 pounds. Since my very first visit, I've lost 17 pounds.

Words are hard to come by, except to say now finally I have hope not to be fat for the rest of my life.

It is GREAT to hear from you JesikaBeth!!

Lisa, CONGRATS on being down!! that is great news and like Kathleen said, you deserve some good things to happen to you

I am LOVING my new-to-me car, I got it in July but knew she would be my HERO in the snow!! All wheel drive and brand new expen$ive studded snows but now I do not fear or dread driving in the snow. Just gotta watch out for the other schmucks out there

I had to pester the president of the summer job about a payment owed to me, but finally it is coming (or in the mail he says) it was worrying me.

Been already eating my Christmas cookies, gotta get my self-control!!!

It is COLD here, -2 right now!

Things that were making me anxious a week or so ago have lessened!!
* the husband got the garage leak momentarily repaired, and he cleared all the lumber away from the front of the garage, I was stressing that all the lumber was gonna keep us from shoveling the inevitable snow.
*Knowing that check from the summer job is now on it's way is GOOD. It's money I was owed and I hated to have to ask repeatedly but I guess it worked.
*I asked the Postmaster how to deal with my late brother's bills, after I had contacted them already and they keep sending bills, and she showed me how to refuse them, using a thick black magic marker.
* I got the restaurant that we use for our Harley Raffle next month to FINALLY confirm our details, I don't know why a restaurant manager would keep ignoring or forgetting my emails about an event that pays them $2500 just to make and deliver food...!!! but they confirmed and I'm printing out that email as my contract.
feeling better about things!

JessikaBeth, what a relief to see a post from you. So happy you are okay. Hopefully the weight will come off as fast as it came on.

Lisa, that is great news about your weight. I agree with others that it is nice to see you feeling good about yourself. Have you joined any groups in your new location? met any people?

Holly, we had snow all day Saturday and had to cancel one book club Christmas gathering...hopefully we will have it tomorrow. We are all making an unusual cookie and everyone will taste and critique to see if it is worth making again. I made mini cheesecakes with Oreos instead of Vanilla wafers on the bottom, and half a can of cherry pie filling mixed in with the cheese,eggs, sugar and vanilla, then topped with a bit of the cherry pie filling. I volunteered to host, so have unfortunately been eating the chocolates, cashews, cheese and crackers I planned to put out! And now we have snow in the forecast again! Last Saturday after cancelling, I was sitting watching the snow come down as the television meteorologist was saying the South Coast was getting hit, but not the Cape. Huh!

I'm so glad somethings worked out for you, Holly. Isn't it nice when that happens. Takes a weight off, for sure.

It has not snowed here, Holly but I'm excited to take the Element out when it snows. I have all new tires and the car is either AWD or FWD, I can't remember? I hope it drives good and is fun.

It had better snow here this winter or I'l be mad.

Hope is so important and i honestly didn't have any, before this whole low carb thing.

I have to take it one day at a time. I love to picture Jennifer's face the next time she sees me but I had to stop doing that. It is important for me to focus one day at a time and not look ahead.

No, I haven't gone out at to meet new people, at all. I have trouble walking so I need to focus on me right now.




I haven't been eating very good the past few days so tonight, I am making chili. It is actually not too bad for me. It's got meat, beans, crushed tomatoes, chili mix and onions in it. I can make a pot and eat off of it for 2 or 3 days. Need to get back on the wagon and make better choices.

I tried flavored sparkling water and it's gross. bleh


Thank you all for your kind words about me deserving this.

I would love to find a local book club. That would be so much fun, Monica.

Well... yeah!!! of course!!

also meant to comment on your pretty holiday avatar pic!

and I bet your Element will also be awesome in the snow, I hope you get some to test drive it in

Hello Everyone

So glad to be back! Sorry if you all worried. I was unable to log back in at work, and then my home laptop shot the sh*t, so that was that. Things have been crazy making

Where do I begin? Yea, so Hurricane Harvey was the beginning of the crazy making. Our home didn't get any damage, but the city was under water. We were flooded in our neighborhood for about a week. My father and his wife and pets had to evacuate to San Antonio, but they only received a little bit of property damage and no damage to their home. Grateful for that, but watching the city rebuild was beyond sad

In September my Diabetes doctor put me on Topamax to help with weight loss, and that ended up sending me into something called Serotonin Syndrome (I was already on other medication for Bipolar Disorder, but that addition just tipped something over the edge.) It was awful. Serotonin Syndrome, if not caught early, can be fatal. Luckily, I had a mild case, but I can tell you I felt absolutely horrible - not only symptom wise, but I was confused a great deal, and a slew of other issues. My doctor's had to discontinue 3 medications at once, including my ADHD medication because the Serotonin Syndrome caused me to be severely tachycardic and my mood stabilizer because my electrolytes went wacky. Once I was actually awake enough to feel much of anything, the emotional havoc began. The last 3 months has been playing with my psych medication *again* and recovering from the longer term physical effects of the Serotonin Syndrome. I'm now increasing a dose of my new mood stabilizer, and very very slowly getting back to my usual self

I've been quit smoking now for over 6 months (yay!) but have managed to put back on every single pound plus 3lbs of what I had lost the 4 months previous to quitting smoking. I'm quite disheartened and angry with myself, because I was at over a 100 pound weight loss in total, and now I'm resting at 60 pounds lost. Ugh. My jeans don't fit anymore, I'm down to 2 pairs of work pants that fit, and just feeling pretty miserable with that

My PCOS has been out of control, too. At the risk of TMI, I've been on my lady days since November 1st. I'm hormonal on top of everything emotionally with the med adjustments, bloated on top of the weight gain, and just feeling ugh.

I found out last week, my therapist of 20 years is moving out of state (BAD timing eh?), and this Friday will be my last face to face session with her. I will continue to have SKYPE sessions with her, but definitely not the same. She has been an integral part of my life - of growing up, and I've been seeing her since I was 17. She's seen me through recovering from an eating disorder, becoming mentally stable, getting on disability, coming out as a lesbian, graduating college, surviving cancer, getting off disability, getting into a career, and getting married. I'm pretty sad about this, happy for her, but feeling a great sense of loss

Lastly, this will be the first Holiday without my mom. I'm struggling a bit with that, especially with spending more time with my wife's family.

So that's where I'm at. Sorry this is such a long post!

In positive news --

I ONLY have 2 weeks of hours left of my counselor internship - (Internship is a total of 4,000 hours.) It's been a wild ride these past 2 years, but once my intern hours are up, I submit everything to the state licensing board for my full license as a chemical dependency counselor

I am looking forward to the New Year I am hopping back on my weight loss, and my goal is to get as close to my UGW as I can (I have a total of 75 pounds to lose to my UGW.)

My word/theme for the new year is 'confidence' - in all areas of my life.

Well, glad to be back with you all!! I have missed you dearly and thought about you guys often