[subeau]

so im on a handful of meds but they havent made a difference in my weight in the past.thru out my life my weight has been up & down due to a history of ED.mostly down BUT since my divorce began i have rapidly been gaining despite my efforts to lose.i dont have my children with me(they arent babies & made a choice to stay with their pets friends & schools.)one of my girls is bullimic.i miss them terribly but make every effort to see them.they only call me when they are having some sort of disaster.The only place i can afford to live is in the next state with my only friend.my family lives far away.my father has fallen ill. blah blah blah.ive been on weight watchers for 3 months & managed to gain a few pounds.im embarrassed & confused.im going to visit my family in a warm climate in a week or so & i have no clothes that fit.Ive spent all i can afford on new clothes but for the season here since i figured id be close to fighting weight by spring. what is happening to me?i feel as tho ive lost complete control of my life & my body.my body has been the one thing i have always been able to control & now i have lost that too.