Good morning, everyone. I am having my coffee and computer time before getting on with the weekly "Paying of the Bills" routine. Thank God in the last round, we had more money come in than went out. What a nice change that was!

I am happy as all get out that we are finally in the weekend. I plan some meditative exercise this weekend that will help me get back into the zone of ignoring my co-workers so they don't make the same kind of emotional they did on me this week. Yesterday, my rights to opening or closing the window directly behind my desk where taken away. Believe it.

For the good of the greater group, who say they are hot, I cannot close the window if I am cold and have a damp breeze blowing on my back. It's stupid. I know. I'm not upset about it any longer, since I'm working to be Zen about the whole situation. I'm going to dig through my closets this weekend for a couple sweaters that I can take in to layer, if needed, from now on. Yesterday, I was able to relocate to another workspace in the building to work on a specific project. I may also issue a request for my workspace to be swapped with one of the women who wants the windows open wide, so she can enjoy the damp breeze and I can be away from the draft.

Interestingly, I felt a strong drive yesterday to head to the gym and workout hard in order to vent my frustration. I view this as a success since my old habit was to binge on sugar to kill my emotions. So, I kicked it on the rowing machine, in circuit training, and finally for a mile of walk/jog intervals on the track.

good morning!

Sabrina - enjoy your weekend away! So glad that you received your treasured pictures of your angel daughter and CONGRATS on such a good doctor's report!

worththeeffort2 - I am MAD at the co-worker who was so dismissive to you, and at the one who is such a crybaby that she had to have your rights to your window taken away! But I think it is great that you felt the need to hit the gym and work out like a boss and SUPER YAY for more money IN than OUT!

Hi Amy (Seabiscuit) - way to go on being UNDER calories!! that is fan-tastic

coffeeshopgirl - really sorry about your current anxiety..and yeah we don't need that when we are trying so hard to make good changes for ourselves. we are here for you

Kathleen - congrats on working out, 4 of 5 days! sorry to hear the scale is being rude to you (down 3, up 3, what the heck!) If you go to the lake house this weekend, I hope you have a wonderful time

lilturtle eating less than 800 calories is not much!! hope the Indian food was good and your trip is so soon now!

projectjudi - oh my gosh that does sound scary about the hernia!! how soon do you have to deal with this??

Monte Cristo - - congrats on your sugar free days!! that is a huge accomplishment. Besides obvious sugar, do you have to search for hidden sugar like in ketchup or wheat english muffins? Sorry about your abrupt change in weather temperature, our REGULAR temperature lately has been about 49 and no sun

Lisa (Ohiofreespirit) Hi and how are you doing

Fi - - Hi Fi, you must still be working away with the BERP Have you been sleeping alright?

Hi Hope I'll still say HI in case you are reading

I am almost beyond discouraged about our stupid weather, spring just is NOT coming this year I guess. Day after day of heavy cloud cover, sporadic rain, temperatures barely reaching 52 as a high..I've had almost 3 weeks off and have been out on my motorcycle TWICE. I've just done some raking outside but half the lawn still looks like crap back to work fulltime next week and THAT is when it will start to warm up! what...the...heck...

Also WAY overate last night, just because the chicken thighs I made for dinner were so darn good and becase I just wasn't feeling any will power at all. I was discouraged at the wide range of sizes of capris I ended up buying, the 12's were nicely loose but I wish the only size that fit were 8, and there was a 10 in there too. I know that truly the only thing that matters is inches/size, but I do so love seeing a size 8 fit instead of 12.

Have a charity fundraiser calcutta/raffle to go to this afternoon evening, it's a motorcycle crowd so that's always fun. Don't know what I'm gonna wear..and have to deal with my hair, just got it cut/highlighed on Thursday and I still don't know how to deal with it (blow dry straight down with straight down bangs as the stylist did, and I feel like a weirdo? or fluff it a bit, as I still try to re-live the 80's? )

oh this was my exercise from yesterday, 40 minutes of HIIT cardio and core

http://www.fitnessblender.com/v/work...g-and-Core/hv/

Hey if I started an exercise thread, would anyone else post in it?

Hi there,

Thanks everyone for the positive feedback. I went over my calories yesterday and I would have today too if I logged my overeating this light ice cream that I bought. It's tempting to overeat, that's something I struggle with and this seemed like a trigger/binge food.

I have to get going, have a great day!

Take care!

Amy

I am writing from my phone at the lake, so will be brief.

projectjudi: That is awful about your hernia!!! Sounds so painful and uncomfortable. I am just glad they found it so you can get it removed and feel much better. I would be scared too though...... but you will be okay..... actually much better when that horrendous thing is removed!!! Try to focus on that if you can. Best of luck and prayers to you! I hope you will get back to healthier eating soon. You can do it!

Trish: Thinking of you as you prepare for your trip on Monday. All will be well..... all will be well..... all will be well!!! (Repeat to yourself.)

Will post to the rest of you later from hubby's computer! Take good care everyone!

Sorry I didn't check in yesterday: I have been working very long hours on the BERP, like 10 hours a day, but the progress is slow. Going through magazines and scientific journals one page at a time looking for useful images to clip is definitely going to be the slowest part of this project in terms of visible results. But the end of the clipping part is in sight. Next I need to clear out an area where I'm hoping Bob will build a nice-looking piece of cat furniture—not one of those things you buy in a store that have cream-colored carpeting on them, but something that will resemble a very simple, modernistic apartment building for cats, except made of nice wood with a nice finish. (Bob loves working with wood and is especially good at stains and finishes.)

Anyway, sorry to go on about that when others, like poor Judi with her hernia, are really suffering. I've been sleeping well: 10 PM to 6 AM for two nights in a row. It's because I'm doing physical labor all day. I think my right arm, especially my shoulder muscles, are going to be outstanding by the time this project is over.

But things aren't going so hot back in my home state of Texas, where my mother has Alzheimer's and started throwing tantrums in her special "memory care" facility, so she's been on a geriatric psych ward for two weeks. My sister is the family member who has to be there when this sort of thing happens, and she's all stressed out & angry about it. She took it out on me over the phone, and I wound up breaking down and crying. Then my sister hung up on me and I kept crying the whole rest of the day, not getting any work done on the house.

My family of origin is so horrible. I mean my parents were. They both physically abused me when I was a child, but I intervened to protect my little sister from all of that: I was six years old when she was born, so I was old enough to get between my parents and her and take the blows myself. My sister and I were very close all through her grade school years, but then I turned 18 and went to college 1400 miles away, and she massively resented me for doing that.

And that's basically been the story ever since: we build a fragile truce, she gets mad at me and it breaks down, and so on ad infinitum. She doesn't want me down there in Texas helping take care of Mom, though. (My dad died in '07.) She thinks I would make the situation worse. She thinks all these crazy things about me because my parents bad-mouthed me in her ears so convincingly for nearly 40 years, she's effectively brainwashed. =sigh= She sure can hurt me bad over the phone. She did it today. My eyes are so puffy from crying, I can just barely see out of them. I'm just hopin' to be able to get back in the saddle tomorrow. Normally Sunday is my one day off from the BERP, but today was blown to pieces by my long bawling jag, so I'll have to forgo my day of rest this week. I just hope I can sleep tonight. Sorry for all my rambling. I'll stop writing now and not subject you nice people to any more of my crap.

Fi: Great to hear from you, but I am so sorry that your mom is basically in a geriatric psych ward and your sister had you in tears much of the day. None of you has to apologize for sharing any of your hard times. All of us have rough times and we need to be able to share BOTH our ups AND our downs in this group. Each of our struggles are different and unique, and none matter less than others, especially to the one going through the difficult time. So vent all you want, everyone! Share your ups AND your downs and we will be cheering for each other through it all!!! Fi, that is horrible that you were physically abused as a child and that you were forced into the position of "protecting" your little sister when you were just a child yourself. I am so very sorry that you had to grow up in that environment. Tears for Little Fi..... .....and a big hug for Big Fi! You are truly a SURVIVOR!!! Embrace and celebrate that fact.

worththeeffort2: I sure do hope you can swap workspaces with someone else who WANTS the cold air blowing in on them! Hope you are getting around to those meditative exercises that will allow you to be more at peace in your work environment.

Holly: Sounds as though you are busy as a bee! I am at the lake house now and having a wonderful time, thank you. Sending you to resist your own yummy cooking!!! Try not to sweat the overeating too much and jump right back on board. You have been doing so well! Our weather in Ohio has been crazy, too. Can't wait until it stays consistently warm. Hope you had a great time at the fundraiser with your motorcycle crew! I'm sure you looked wonderful!

Amy: Thanks for checking in! Remember when using MFP that it is a tool to HELP ~ not shame ~ you on your journey. It's all about PROGRESS and not perfection! You can do this!


As I mentioned, we are at the lake and I got a lot of exercise in today. Walked with my family and also with our dogs and took a bike ride around the islands with my hubby! I love it when exercise feels FUN!!! Food is always a challenge up here, but I am doing okay with it. Yep, just okay.
Seems to always be room for improvement with me in the healthy eating and/or smaller portions department.

Fiona: I'm sorry to learn about the abuse you suffered as a child. Please know your experience is not uncommon among survivors of childhood abuse who protected their siblings, then escaped when presented with the first opportunity. I'm sorry your parents created a toxic environment for both their children. Perhaps, at some point in the future, you and your sister will be able to heal and build a more stable, loving, and supportive relationship. I hope so.

Today, I staged a purge in the house. A friend of mine is going through a difficult time and will be incurring major medical bills in the coming months. Her family is preparing to so a number of fundraisers to help defray the expenses for her. Since it is time for spring cleaning, I took advantage of the opportunity to gather some stuff together to donate to the cause. My husband and I just finished loading two big boxes of books, a box of household goods, and a large bag of clothes and jewelry into the back of the car.

It feels SO good to clear unneeded clutter out of the house. It feels so GOOD to pack a bag of clothing that is still in perfectly good condition but is now way too large for me. It feels especially good to know that all of these items will go to a cause that supports a friend in time of very serious need. I hope they get a lot of other donations and that this first fundraiser makes a lot of money for the cause.

Hi there,

Thank you again to everyone for the encouragement!

Judi- I'm sorry about your hernia, hugs. A relative of mine had a hernia, had surgery and now he is doing great. Think positively!

Fiona- I am very sorry about the Alzheimer's, another relative of mine has it and it's sad. The Alzheimer's Association is a good resource. I'm not sure if they have support groups.

Believe- thank you for those kind and encouraging words, I needed to hear that!

Worth the effort- I agree on getting rid of clutter, that's what I'm about to do in a few minutes, I keep getting rid of junk because I'm moving. Less is more!

Take care everyone! It's a beautiful day! Now, if only spring allergies would calm down.

Amy

Hello!

Fi - I am so sorry to hear of the terribly upsetting phone call. It is so hard to understand HOW parents can abuse their own children..and how that affects the dymanics of siblings. You were a hero to your little sister! at way too young an age though what a responsibility. And now to have that sister have the ability to 'get' to you really sorry.

worththeeffort2 - I am sorry to hear of your friend's medical troubles, but what a good friend you are to immediately help and what a bonus when it precipitates getting items out of the house that will then go to a good cause! win/win Oh and especially saying 'buh-buy' to those too large clothes!

Kathleen - HOw great to make exercise FUN! It must have been nice weather for you to be able to walk the dogs and bike. Yay! Yes I had a very good time at the fundraiser, ate very little but drank 6 Coronas and as I am the reigning 2013 Miss Crossroads Motorcycle Rally Queen (yes I brought my sash and tiara in my purse ) I got to pull the last 5 big ticket numbers from the drum. I also got a great consolation prize, a Biolage box of shampoo and conditioner, and our motorcycle rights group pooled money to buy another ticket, and won a car wash kit, value $50.

Amy - Hi how is the moving / packing process? Hope it's not too much of a pain. Oh I also find it so easy to 'overdue' on something like lite ice cream..tastes so good, it just makes me want more. Hope your calories are good to you today. I"m glad you've had some beautiful weather but i hope your allergies don't bother you too much.

Hi to lilturtle, Ohio, Chelsea, Monte Cristo, projectjudi, 1life2liv, coffeeshopgirl, and Hope

today was 45 and rainy AGAIN. I remember a science fiction short story of a place where it rained 364 days of the year; one day of the year there was sun for one hour, that's how it feels here

Hi Holly,

It's great to hear from you! My allergies feel a bit better now, thank you. I have a prescription nasal spray that the doctor called in.

I was working away at packing, I need to get back to that. As my high school advisor said, "(I) am the Queen of Procrastination!"

Ok, now I want to get this box packed before dinner!

I hope you get some sunshine soon!

Take care!

Amy

I really appreciate the things you guys said about my rough childhood and the role I played for my sister. And you know what? I just got off the phone with her: she called me, to repair our relationship after what went down yesterday. What a loving thing for her to do...we are back on wonderful terms with each other, and my sweet sister, Lee Ellen, is the one who made it happen. I'm very tired right now and I need to crash, but I just wanted to y'all about that. =smile=

That's wonderful, Fiona!

Have a good night everyone.

Amy

Fi: I am so happy to hear that your sister called to repair your relationship! Thank you for sharing this good news with us. Hope you will sleep better knowing all is well with you and your sister.

worththeeffort2: You are a good friend to get right to work on donations to benefit your friend who is going through a difficult time. And purging (your) house is something I am working on right now, too. I have been working periodically with a professional organizer, because it is very difficult for me to organize and get rid of things for a variety of reasons. So I applaud you for doing it on your own, with help from your hubby!

Amy: Good for you for taking the time to get rid of clutter as you prepare for your move. How ironic: we are BOTH "Queens of Procrastination!" Hope you can get your allergies under control soon. Those darn allergies sure can make you miserable.

Holly: The weather wasn't great (cool and very windy), but we made the best of the DRY, partly sunny day at the lake. It is so much fun to walk and ride bikes up there, especially with my hubby and our little family, which includes our 3 dogs, of course! Glad to hear that the fundraiser was fun and (it sounds like) exciting! I am so impressed that THE reigning 2013 Miss Crossroads Motorcycle Rally Queen is a member of OUR group!!! You are one popular chick, Holly!!!

Trish: I will be thinking of you tomorrow (Monday). Praying that you will not experience too much anxiety and that all will go well for you! Have a wonderful time with your mother!


I have battled a migraine the past couple days, but ~ thankfully ~ still managed to have a great time at the lake. It is so relaxing up there..... and NO CLUTTER!!! Waving hello to everyone! Please check in when you can!

Judi - I am sorry to hear about your hernia. I would be scared too. But you can get it removed. That should help. I'll be thinking of you.

Fiona - that is great news about your sister!

I'm terrible at addressing everyone but I am reading along.

Today is my flight. I didn't sleep last night. I'm really nervous. In less then 12 hours it will all be over. I overate this weekend too. I've been so good. I did lose 1 1/2 lbs between Tuesday and Friday. Not sure how the weekend affected it. Next time I post it will be from Florida.

ˇFeliz Cinco de Mayo! No guac and chips or margaritas for me! Instead, I'm declaring my independence from fat and my observance of today will be to hit the elliptical later.

Fiona, it's great news that your sister called to apologize for her behavior and make up with you.

The forecast is for sunshine some of the day today. I have an eye appointment this morning so will be clinging to my darkest pair of sunglasses since I'll be getting dilated. The upside to that is that I won't be going to work today so can do my workout later this afternoon. Truly, it seems that my life has gone from revolving around food to revolving around when I can schedule a workout.