Bullied at work

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  • That's absolutely horrific! you are a human being! If anyone spoke to me that way I would still be crying a week from then... No body deserves that, it's harassment and you aren't in middle school anymore. File a complaint, sure he isn't worth listening to and all that but stuff a sock in his big fat douche bag mouth and go to your boss about it!
  • Hi everyone. I just moved into a new client room!! It was so sad for me to leave my old room friends behind. I didn't even look at the jerk or his friends. Good riddance to em! I am surrounded by a really nice bunch of people, who actually know how to behave like professionals and adults
  • I am so glad this finally worked out!! You have done a very good job telling us all about the situation, plus you have explained the cultural differences that made the situation difficult to handle, different maybe than in the U.S. Best wishes to you!!
  • I'm so happy that you moved and are now surrounded by nice people, but I still think it's not fair that they get away with bullying you like that. That was just so rude and mean, I can't believe some people actually act like that! From what I see in your avatar here you are a gorgeous woman, perhaps that's what was really bothering them
  • Quote: Hi everyone. I just moved into a new client room!! It was so sad for me to leave my old room friends behind. I didn't even look at the jerk or his friends. Good riddance to em! I am surrounded by a really nice bunch of people, who actually know how to behave like professionals and adults
    Congrats! I hope the people in your new room are better behaved. And now your old room supervisor knows what the jerk has been up to and will probably be keeping an eye on him.
  • I'm glad things are looking up for you!

    A.
  • Thanks everyone!! The support you guys have given me has really helped me regarding this situation.

    @Natasha22 - Hahahaha!! I don't know if that is the case. Maybe someone should tell him that he should be nice to girls he finds attractive huh? Such a neanderthal!! He has a girlfriend. Poor thing..

    My old room supervisor told us yesterday afternoon that they will be shifting to a multi-client room which they will be sharing with other people. I was really happy for the others in the room because I thought that this would shut the jerk up (coz there will be more people in the room). Unfortunately the room supervisor will be moving downstairs, which means there will be no one to keep at tab on the jerk. I am really worried for my old room friends because I am sure this jerk is going to behave a million times worse now..

    On the bright side, I am happy I mentioned my issue to the room supervisor before the move happened. Otherwise I would have been stuck in that miserable situation for a long time.
  • I'm So PROUD Of You <333333333333333333333333333
  • I'm entering late but I'd write down everything, keep a list of witnesses to the events, and talk to HR. I'm sorry this is happening. Makes me angry for you.
  • Quote: Hi everyone

    I just joined 3FCOAD. I was looking for some help relating to the issue I am having at work and I came across this website. So here goes.

    I am a 26 year old who is overweight. Not obese. I have a big butt and fat arms and am 5'4. Recently a bunch of new guys joined the room I am working in (we have different client rooms) and they keep bullying me about my weight. For example, I was looking at one of my friends' Blackberry phone and one of the guys came up to me and said "oh thats a good phone for you coz it matches your size." I was so embarrassed I wanted to die. The same person took my lunchbox once and held it up for the entire room to see (its a small box) and said "see how little she eats in office. She must be gorging at home huh?" The bullying has got so bad that I don't feel like going to office anymore.

    I feel like killing myself. I frequent the gym and I am seeing good results. But I feel like an ugly blob and my self esteem is at a negative bazillion because of this bullying. Please help me.

    Is that a picture of yourself in your avatar? Whoever it is is absolutely beautiful, and if it is you, he probably has a foolish crush on you.

    Still, what he is doing is mean spirited and cruel. Can you talk to him alone and ask him to stop? Perhaps he doesn't realize that his insensitivity towards you is very hurtful. Some people say stuff meaning to joke around, but end up hurting others. If that doesn't work, go to your boss and report him. There shouldn't be any tolerance for crap like that, joking around or not.

    Please, don't you EVER think of killing yourself over another human being, or any reason for that matter! You deserve to live a happy, healthy, and bountiful life, don't ever let anyone ignorant like this make you feel this awful about yourself- you don't deserve it!

    Often times, "bullies" have been the object of bullying themselves, whether it's from home, work, sports, school, etc. He can't have a good self esteem himself, if he feels the need to say such things to another person who's done no harm to him.

    Sending you a big hug. Hang in there, sweetie, and I hope your work situation gets better for you.

    Edit- I just read the posts above- so happy for you that you are out of that room and away from that buffoon! You deserve so much better, sweetie, glad you're away from those idiots!
  • I am sorry I could not log in to 3FCOAD in a long time. I am so touched by all your comments. I truly appreciate your words of love and encouragement.

    @Steelslady - Yes that is me Thank you so much!!

    It has been a week since I moved to this room. I am so happy!! The people here are a very nice bunch of people who are very caring and friendly. It shows that one spoiled apple ruins the whole bunch (I hope I got that right lol) because I can see a big difference in the attitudes and behaviors of the people I associate with now and the ones I had to associate with before. Many of my friends told me the past couple of days that I look prettier. And I think it is because I am not depressed anymore and it shows on my face. I can feel a huge difference in my body.

    I had my annual appraisal a yesterday and my previous supervisor (who I told my problem to) had appraised me really well. I was worried that he would have thought I was being too emotional and this would affect my appraisal but he had been very fair during the whole appraisal process. As he said, he is a fair person and I am so grateful I had the opportunity to tell my problem to him. I met him a few days ago and he was like "How are you? Is everything okay?" and he asked me to remind my current supervisor about my appraisal. Such a nice person

    There is a new trainer at my gym who is really nice. My elder brother jokes that I am going to molest him because I like him so much lol. The reason I like him so much is because he is so nice to everyone at the gym. The previous instructors used to talk only to their favorites or to the pretty ladies who used to come to the gym. So this poor guy got picked on by a man who apparently has been a member of the gym for the past 15 years. The instructor had asked to see his membership on 5 consecutive days and each day this man gets so offended and starts screaming at him in front of everyone in the gym. Some Sri Lankans have this mentality where they think that if they have a good job (this man is an engineer) everyone else is dirt. He spoke to this poor guy in such a rude manner, even my brother got angry. And this man got other men in the gym involved and they started bullying the poor guy saying "Do you know he has been coming to this gym for 15 years? How dare you ask to see his membership?" etc.

    The owner of the gym goes to the church I go to. So I told the instructor (who is new to the gym and therefore did not know the engineer is an old customer) that if he needs me to, I can talk to the owner. You guys should have seen his face light up!! Because no one was taking his side. I know first hand how that feels so I wanted to help him. Anyway the instructor is not in any trouble because he had told the senior management about this and they are fully on his side.

    I mentioned this story to you guys because it was you guys who gave me the strength to support this poor man. It disgusts me to see how people treat the less fortunate. We are all human beings and it is not right to treat another human being in a bad manner just because they are poor.

    Sorry for rambling on for so long and thanks again for all the love
  • Sharmsluv -- I'm so glad that you solved your problem AND were able to help someone else with their problem!!

    You can always tell the strength of someone's character by how they treat those who can do nothing for them.
  • I guess judging by your ticker, you are in Sri Lanka and not the U.S. Here you would be in MAJOR trouble for doing such a thing--most likely lose your job from any reputable company and could be facing a lawsuit.

    You could try talking to him one on one. You could ignore him. You could take things off the court so to speak and see what you could do away from the office.

    In any case, it isn't okay what he is doing. In the end and no matter the culture the guy is a Pu**y.
  • oh glad you got it resolved!
  • I know that this may sound bad, but since he's behaving like such a middle schooler, use your phone to video record how he's behaving. Sometimes, people need to be exposed to a greater audience than their bosses or friends for their inappropriate behavior. You could post the footage in whatever manner you see fit. I know what people are going to say about my idea, but just think about this:

    If he's fired from his current position. Then maybe you'll be able to save other people from this type of treatment, at least at your work. So what if he gets another job. The point is that if someone is told this is inappropriate behavior or offensive and it needs to stop, and they continue to do it, then they truly deserve to be exposed to the general public.

    Sorry, I got ticked off after reading through the thread about what has happened to you.