Yes she plans on visiting on weekends and asked if I could pick her up. Her mom is not happy about it and makes her feel bad. When she went on a visit at her moms house she was talking and accidently called me momma when she was talking and her sis in law lectured her. When she has actually lived with me longer than she has lived with her mom. She only lived with her mom for a few months before she went into foster care. To me it feels like you know someone has a terminal disease but you dont know when they will go. Cause I go to think when we go camping or go swimming at my moms or the beach.....etc...and then I remember she probably wont be with us then. I didn't go to church tonight just because I didn't want to be around people. This is helping me to trust and lean on God when I dont have the strength. I just feel like my heart is being ripped out of me. I never thought it would be this bad...I mean I knew it would be bad.
I am sorry other than my best friend you guys are the only ones I have talked to about this. Because even if I break down typing about it I dont feel like an idiot...Sorry I am so stuck on it I just and having a hard time. I had to fake like everything was ok today just to keep myself from breaking down. Being on of the pastor's wives in the church it was hard because I still had to smile and talk to everyone or they think I dont like them.... I hope she will have to stay until the end of the school year gives us a little more time with her. I know she is a different and better person now. She is not the same girl that came in here. She was so hurt and wounded from other foster homes, she cut, No one helped her get thru the death of her father....Just so much stuff and now she is so much stronger and atleast I KNOW she knows what is right and wrong and how to make the right choices!

Ok enough for tonight. I am gonna go talk to you ladies later..Thanks for your support.

Hi all,
It has been a little while. I had my little baby girl on Feb 12th. Some of you may remember that I was having a difficult pregnancy. Well everything went well with the delivery. She is beautiful and all of my other problems went away right after delivery. My gestational diabetes went away which I am so greatful for. We named her Eva and she was 7lbs 10 oz and 19 3/4" long.

Mom of 4 I am so sorry to hear about foster daughter. I hope all goes well and you have peace with it in the end.

Talk with you all later.

Trish

trish congrats on the baby. I am glad everything got better for you after the delivery!!! Enjoy the little one!!!

Congratulations Trish!! What wonderful news!!

Momof4 :hug: so sorry you are having to go through this.

Hey Raven good to see you again!

Big hello's to everyone else.

hi all.

I am just bummed. Stupid but I am just really sick of people always coming and talking to my best friend or if I'm with my DH they only talk to him, not me. I know its mostly my own fault because I've been told that I am "unapproachable" and most people think I'm mad at the world. I've never just been a smiley person. I remember working in retail and fast food and the customers would always tell me to smile...........I guess that is why this job is perfect, they don't see me, only hear my voice..............

I dunno just kinda sick of it. I know its all my doing and I could change it myself, but I dunno just bummed. :(

I hope your all well.

:wave: and :hug:

Hi everyone!
Beautiful sunny day here, but boy is it cold!! -36*C (-29*F) but we've warmed up to -20*C (-4*F) and we are suppose to get up to above freezing in a couple of days, its crazy!
Saw my doctor yesterday and he's added celexa to my list. Suppose to help the anxiety, so we'll see.
Other than that nothing new here. Hope you are all keeping well.
Take care,
K

Hi girls,

I'm out of town at my friend's house for a couple of days. I'm actually going back home tomorrow. It's been nice to get away. I got to see my mom as well since she lives about an hour and a half away. We haven't done a lot, just some shopping and decorating for her apartment which we always have fun doing. I has been relaxing.

I spoke to df and he is still concerned about his work being slow so I may try to wait tables a few days a week somewhere. I'll have to see who will work around my schedule.

Momof4: sorry you are having a tough time. Big :hug: for all you have done for her and your own family.

Buddly: I'm on celexa as well. I haven't noticed much anxiety since I started it. I hope it works for you.

Raven: sounds like a good idea, mixing exercise with earning $$. I wouldn't mind doing some dog walking myself.

Heather: Cool, a real vacation sounds so awesome. I'm envious.

Trish: Conrats on the little one. So glad to hear you both are doing well. Hope to see you around in here more. Keep us posted on the baby.

Sassy: I'm not a smiler either. I have always been told to smile more. I hate it and it makes me smile less.

Good night all...

Well am feeling ok...I have a meds appt next thursday I am really going to see if i can get a low dose of lexapro because it worked very very well with my mood and with the wellbutrin to keep off the crying and no energy i should be good to go. I am just back to the point I have to MAKE myself be happy or in a good mood. Its really bad when my foster dd tells her friends she doesnt know if Ill be in a good mood when she wants to ask bout them coming over...LOL...There is just a lot going on and i tend to loose patience and little things aggrivate me and I need to just chill and calm down I think that will help.

ON A positive note I managed to stay at my calorie range. Before I ate supper I typed in what we were having then measured it all out so I could still have a snack I got at the store!! I was soo happy and it felt so good to not have a guilt hanging over my head for going over my limit. Like I could have snacked now late night but since I did well with my calories I dont want to screw it up... Ok well have a good night!!!

:wave:

Good morning everyone!

Snowing again here! blah, when is spring arriving!! I'm home today, so that makes me happy.

Hope I'm hoping that the celexa works with no side effects. The adjustment period is yucky tho:dizzy:

Hope you are all doing well.:grouphug:
Take care all,
K

I have been doing well with calories the last three or four days I have done great stayed level. When I first started tracking calories I was all over the chart but now I have an idea of what to eat and how much. It feels good to know that I am staying on track. I am slowly getting on track it feels good!! Ok gotta go just thought I would check in!!!

Hi everyone, I also wanted to check in. It's really cold here as well. This has been a difficult week for me and with tom I'm feeling extra down. :( I'm going to see my doc next week and this time I just have to stick with it because I really do want to get better.

Just wanted to say hi also. I've gotta take a shower and get to bed. Today was my first day back at work. It wasn't too bad. I may apply to a restaurant to wait tables part time tomorrow. I haven't told df yet. I'm kinda still deciding. That would be job #3. We need the $$ though. He's really down about work being slow.

Ok, night night.

Where are you peeps? Did you all start the weekend early? ;)

I put in an application at the restaurant tonight. Hopefully it won't be thrown into a pile a mile high. We ate sushi tonight and spent way too much $$. Just the problem I'm trying to fix. I often work against myself.

What are you all doing this weekend? There is so much I need to do around the house. Check in tomorrow.

Just popping in to say Hi!:wave::wave:

Not much new around here. Went to work today and boy am I sore. Hubby is out of town so I have to get up to get DdA to work for 6am. Fun and games.

Hope everyone is doing well.

Take care,
K

nothing much tom came in town...shoulda known I got the headache I get right before he comes. Last night I thought my head was gonna blow off even after I took meds. for it. So yeah a blah day I am just gonna hang out. Have to watch my sisters baby this after noon but nothing else really going on!! Ok catch you all lata!!

Hello all
Tom for me also.Misreable and crampy.On call all weekend again.Nice today.Walked dogs.Kids had friends over and for they actually played outside.Woot woo!!!Spring is certainly coming.......finally.Have a nice weekend.

I'm in the 'not much happening' boat also. I went to work, took a nap, then overate. Pretty much just another day! :o

Buddly, I had to be at work at 6am too, hence the nap.

It's rainy here but I don't mind it. Have a good Sunday girls.

I HATE TOM because all I want is chocalte and soda....which is awful for my calories...today was the first day I went over my calories but I walked to the park and did stuff to make up for it but still....BLAHHH...Like I want to go do something but no energy to go do something. I want to run down to the store and get chocolate and a soda but I dont have the energy. JUST BLAHHHHHHHHHHH ok anyways I agree spring is almost here I cant wait I love spring and fall cause they are just the right tempature not too cold and not too hot!! The good news is I am losing the 3 lbs a week just by tracking the calories if I put more excercise in I would totally rock but that will come you have to start somewhere. I am doing well at controllying my food if I had only known it wasnt as hard as it seemed I would have done it sooner. You do have to have self control but for most days I am able to eat be full and have a snack later...DAYS like today is when it is hard but they dont come very often!!! Enough from me...lata

Good job Momof4!! :bravo:

uhm, hello ? :listen:

Hey Peeps, I hope you don't mind me saying hello. I have been here periodically (in the forum I mean) when I have needed it. I am feeling like I need it the last few days. The dark visitor has returned I am afraid. :(

Thighs-welcome back its been kinda quiet in here. I think winter brought depression therefore everyone is hiding and not in any mood to talk...LOL

hope-whats up hows things going for you?

Buddly-Hows your weather? You always seem to get the crappiest weather!!

I cant wait for it to get warmer cause then my children can go out and play YAAAA!! Ok it was an ok day TOM makes me want chocolate and makes me want to just eat and eat and eat...Its a good thing my body is in a pattern of eating so much at certain times of the day cause if I eat to much I feel ill... Ok nothing much going on here....catch you all lata!!

Still kinda slow in here huh?

I worked today and then watched a couple of movies at home when I got off. It was kinda relaxing. I can't believe it's bedtime already. The sluggishness I feel is getting to me. I know, I know, I've said it myself: I need to work out.

Welcome back Thighs Be Gone! Good to see you again. Sorry you are having a bout of depression. Any particular reason or just one of those mystery cases?

Mom: Yeah, tom and chocolate go hand in hand. It should almost be over though, right?

Hi everyone!
Just popping in.

It was a beautiful sunny day, even went above freezing! I sure hope this is a sign that spring is close at hand. I've had enough of winter. Got my exercise by going up on the roof and shoveling some of the snow off. Oh the joys of living in the north. Its DdC's spring break, to bad I still have to get DdA to the university, it would be nice to stay home and maybe get something done. Oh well.

Hope everyone is keeping well.
Take care,
K

Hey Hope & Mom. I think a mystery bout on the most part. I can't really put my finger on anything this time around. I am not medicated (have been in the past but gained lotsah weight) and try to do the natural route. I need to get serious again about my vitamin regimen and especially my fish oil. We have had rain and cold weather for several days which has kept me in. The no sunshine factor definitely doesn't help. On a scale of 1-10 I would say my depression now is 7.

My hubby was off on a trip with one of the kids this weekend and they arrived back today. He leaves again tomorrow on business which leaves me alone again. I don't say a word though--tricky economy now and the last thing he needs is me trying to lay a guilt trip on him. I am trying to make his life easier because he does the same thing for me. We have been battling flu here the last couple of weeks but it's gone now thank goodness. I didn't have it but both my children did. Hope you are both well. :)

I am picking up my water jug now and saying, "Toast, to having a good week."

Hi everyone,
Blah, it's Monday. I've been feeling pretty down though I don't know exactly why. I just feel like laying in bed all day, and this week is Spring Break. I should be out of town partying with my friends or something. At least I have been eating pretty healthy and still losing weight, though I need to find some nrg and willpower to exercise

Im the same but im not eating healty today...having a major sugur urge all day...crisps, choc be disgusted with myself tomorrow when im at my weigh in...ugh.......

I just wanted to stay in bed, but going to bed at 3 am probably did not help. I reallly really HATE the whole time change because until it I had gotten in a great routine of getting up at 8:30 every morning with the kids but now it doesnt work that way. When I get up I feel like the day is gone just bugs me.


Hope-Yeah not tooo many days left but it sucks that it has to be like that. its bad enough we have to deal with TOM let alone all the cravings...arggghh. I feel sluggish too so yeah but its kinda dreary looking out. It might be warm but it doesnt really look it!! I really just want to lay on the couch and watch some movies....BUT I have the boys school, cleaning up from the weekend!!

Buddly-Snow off the roof??? You are crazy I wouldnt get up there...I know you probably had to but yeah I woulda roped someone else into it. You def. get a lot of snow. Pa gets snow but you ALWAYS seem to have snow! Have fun!

Thighs-What vitamins do you use to fight it naturally? What is the fish oil. I am medicated but I am sure any vitamins that I could take would help. I did finally start taking a one d day vitamin. It really sucks when your alone. My dh used to work two or three nights a week..2pm-1am and I totally HATED it. Now that he is general manager he only has to do 2 nights every 5 weeks!! So its not as awful as before. I always dreaded when he worked nights cause I felt like it made me more depressed. I wouldnt even do a bedtime I just left the kids crash wherever when ever!! I guess hang in there. To bad you didnt have someone that could come over once in a while so you wouldnt be so lonely!

Butterfly-that sucks but I totally would love to stay in bed too!! You should be having fun though (clean fun...LOL) Cause years down the road your gonna wish you had done more. Are you on any medication?

Ok well gonna go see if I can motivate myself to do something!! Catch you all lata

Hello all! I'm new to 3FC and so far have liked what I see and read. I enjoyed reading this thread so far and feel like I'm getting to know everyone.

Thighs be gone - So sorry to hear things are dark. I just came out of my own spat of it. It's no fun. That's wonderful that you do things naturally. My mil is a big proponent of holistic health, but I'm fairly dependent on my meds.

Mom of 4 - Wow! You're the first PA person I've seen on here so far - I'm south central - near the MD line.

Buddly - A co-worker's hubby was just in BC last week on a ski trip and said it is one of the most beautiful places he's ever seen. I'll have to get the name of the town. I don't envy you your weather, but I would love to travel through your area someday.

So...that's about it I think...just a HELLO! and hope to talk to you all everyday to keep my spirits up and my weight down!
:gossip:

hi ladies,

Welcome BoJo! Look forward to getting to know you. I couldn't live without some medication. I'm on celexa now.

It's been rainy here all day and for the last few days. :rain: I don't mind though. I like a dreary day for some reason. I figured out today that my car inspection ran out in February so I guess I need to get up and take it in before I get to the tax office.

Hugs to everyone who's feeling down and having all the cravings. :hug:

BoJo-as soon as I looked at your info on the side I was like PA!!!! I am in central Pa around Penn State area!! Ya me...lol....Welcome to the chat!!

Hope-I love dreary days too but not when I have to get stuff done cause then its a battle with myself. But I truly had a dreary day and didn't do much and didn't track what I ate. I dont really feel bad because I have done really well for two weeks so I just will have to put forth a little effort tomorrow and get done what I didnt today. I keep forgetting that if I eat too many calories thats not the end of the world cause I can just go excercise and work some of them off...LOL

Ok well I got new home phones today!!! We have had ours for like 4 years and one has been rough for a while. The other one today I would answer I could hear them but they couldnt hear me. So we broke down and bought some new ones!! They are nice!!!

have a good night everyone!!

Hi everyone,

Welcome Bojo, looking forward to getting to know you better. I wouldn't be surprised if your hubby's co-worker was skiing in Whistler, its much closer to Vancouver than we are. And it is beautiful.

momof4 I hope you are getting some sleep tonight, it sure does help make things manageable. We had to buy a new phone not to long ago, hubby signed us up for caller ID and we figured since we have that we better get a phone that uses it. Unfortunately I don't really like this one.

hope I can enjoy some rainy days in the summer, but I'm afraid I need the sunshine. Thankfully we had some sun today.

A big Hello to everyone else!

Went into town and visited with my mom while DdA was at the university. I caught another cold and am terribly stuffed up, hoping it doesn't last long. Nothing exciting foing on here. Just impatiently waiting for spring.

Take care everyone,
K

momof4--fish oil and vitamin D most definitely (unless you are in the sun a lot naturally)..also, I use flaxseed daily which is high in Omega 3's..I have been on Zoloft in the past but haven't taken it in five years now..I would go back on it if my depression never relented..but I have my bouts (I would say moderate ones) that last a few weeks and then I am usually okay for a couple of months..I have found some self-medicating that works for me somewhat--like the vitamins, the sunshine, exercise and knowing when I need to be alone and not feeling guilty for that anymore...

You know I always hear other people say that withdrawing from others makes it worse..while I understand the comment, I find sometimes I just need to be alone..sometimes I literally need to remove myself from any stressors whatsoever and having to deal with people stresses me when I am even feeling borderline much less depressed..

..You know I remember reading here a few weeks back how anxiety happens for many before the depression sets in...I had never considered that before but in my case it is very true...I am very fortunate in that I am able to remove myself pretty easily from most situations since I don't work outside my home..I have thought about returning to work this next year but am concerned it will be too much for me...if I end up mentally unfit because of it, I don't know that it will be worth it in the longrun..

Bojo--thank you..!

Have a good evening ladies. Thank you for listening to me. :) It makes me feel a wee bit better knowing you are all here.

I have some playdates arranged for my kids tomorrow and they are with really good people to be with. I did manage to take them out to the park today and to get some new books from the library. When is spring break over? LOL.

Hello :wave:

Hope you're all well, I've got a bit of catching up to do but will read through all the posts when my head clears... (I've got this flu thing and the words seem to be dancing about, the white page is totally dazzling me)

BoJo, welcome :)

Ok, going to go try and revive my aching bones with a hot bath before I face the cruel cold outdoors... I have a feeling it's going to be a long day.

Have a good day everyone :hug:

,

Hi all still a dreary day out here but I am gonna go to my mom's house. My 4 year old stayed there the last two nights and my 6 year old "sure misses him". I haven't been down there in a while so I figured I could take the kids down. So my 6 year old is finishing his school then we are gonna go...Catch you all lata!!

Hi all - Did the work thing and now I'm eating some veggies for dinner and then hitting the treadmill.

I've just started exercising again so its only a 30 minute time slot on the treadmill, but still...I am just not an exercise person. Never have been. Didn't do sports that much in school - love to hike, but not the rock climbing and mountaineering type stuff, just the looking at nature and enjoying myself kind.

Oh well, gotta adopt the mantra of the lemurs in the movie Madagascar movie "You got to move it, move it. I like to move it, move it. You like to move it, move it..." You get the idea.

:tread:

OMG! I actually have a little time to myself today home alone and I just realized how dirty my house is! I've been working everyday and gone and I thought it was a little cluttered but jeez... I don't know where to start. Check in later when I've done something.