that would cause an world war 4 in this house cause my dh wont go for it. I have tried i used to work 3rd shift but i was prego and tired all the time so it didnt work...if i worked 2 nights a week then that would still not solve the family time....maybe something can come up soon that i could do....thanks girls!!

It wouldn't solve family time but it would give YOU time away, and maybe your dh would start to understand what you go through and decide to help you out more. Maybe like Sandy's dad he may start to 'get it'. I don't know, just a suggestion. (but definitely don't take a 3rd shift...ewww.)

Maybe another option would be to swap kids with another mom one day a week. She watches yours and gives you the whole day off, like day care, then the next day you take hers and she gets a day to herself for errands or housework or just sanity. Do you know anybody who would or could do a one day a week swap?

Bear in mind these suggestions are coming from somebody with no kids and I realize that. I would just love to see you get a little breathing time.

I went to a friend's house tonight for dinner. We had burgers on the grill, fried potatoes with onions, corn on the cob, and a fresh fruit salad.
Yummy.

I better get to bed, 4:30 comes early!

thanks hope and sassy....I think the M.O.P.S. group that my friend told me about does help with sitting or switching so i have to find if there is a group around here (mom of pre schoolers). Also Sassy i figured if it came down to it I will do the babysitting cause once school comes i will be here all the time so yeah.. I would love to work a little i would do great at something with people but its just with the kids and dhs schedule changes and sometimes he has to stay late and then church stuff and he doesnt really want me working outside the home...i guess I will figure it out here at some point!!

Well I gave in...LOL....I ended up mowing the grass!!! Well i got up from my nap not wanting to at all and completely feeling like crap.. Actually i could tell i was feeling a little of the depression coming in because like dh called to say he was leaving work i didnt want to wake up to answer it, then fdaughter had her 2.5 minute phone call I didnt answer it, then my best friend called I didnt answer it and she even called back and i didnt then finally i called her back thinking it was important. it was one of those things that even once i was pretty much awake i just didnt want to talk to anyone or anything.

THEN I went to the church to let the ladies in and another lady was there and was updating me on her children which are in my youth and have a lot of behavior issues...I went down to help the three ladys getting stuff prepared for the dinner after the funeral. Well they asked me something and i was still out of it and tired and feeling weird and the one lady was like TIRED...shes like you dont even know what tired is till you get like us old ladies...ALL honesty the way i was feeling today I wanted to just punch her in the mouth...but thats not the christian way to be so i didnt i was just like Ok i will give you my 4 kids and take whatever you do...WHICH IS NOT MUCH because her husband truck drives so....she doesnt work.... I was like you can have them and have them wake you up thru the night...she was like i would just let them cry...i was like yeah until they all woke up because the other ones crying..its like a cycle you cant let one cry cause that wakes another one up then another then another and 2 of mine once they are awake WONT go back to sleep. Like i wasnt complaining cause i was tired i was saying i was tired because my brain was working so slow and didnt catch what they were talking about....But like seriously...i was a little irked..THEN I was like yeah i cant let the baby (1 yr old) cry cause she makes herself sick and throws up and she was like yeah she only throws up cause she knows mommy will come get me...I am sorry but that is crap you cant tell me a 1 yr old will throw up just so i can get her...BUT ANYWAYS...thank goodness i didnt have to stay there long
I then came home dh had dinner ready...LOL...cause when he got home i had to leave and hes like what is for dinner i was like whatever YOU make hes like WHAT and i threw some ideas at him and left...HAHAHA.... SO after dinner I planned to clean the kitchen but the outside was AWFUL...like lil bags of trash from the cars then bigger bags from the kitchen..toys everywhere, grass way high, so i cleaned that then went to the kitchen..the kitchen is even decluttered!!! SPOTLESS..except i didnt get to scrub the floor...all but 2 baskets of laundry is folded...still got more to wash but its gettin there...
So i did get some energy tonight to do what i needed..

I will stop now for the sake of it being so long....lata
Thanks agian girls!!!

good morning gang

I've been busy busy busy. I'm still posting on the Walk Away the Pounds exercise thread bec I think it's really important for me to exercise and keep it up and it helps to post it there. Accountability really helps!

Anyway, I just wanted to mention that today is Leenie's birthday

I started a Happy Birthday Leenie thread for anyone who wants to wish her a very happy birthday.

I hope everyone can enjoy the blessings in their day!
hugs,
Cathy

Happy birthday to our very own SUPERCHICK!!!

Have a wonderful day, Leenie!!

I feel guilty posting this, because I rarely talk to many of you... this thread just gets so busy and I find it difficult to read through all of the posts & reply to them all.

But this is about the only place I guess I can say it. I'm feeling truly miserable, I honastly just feel like giving everything up. For the past few months I'vs just been plodding alot not really 'feeling' These past few weeks I've been breaking down into tears all of the time. I feel like a totally useless cause. My mum who I've always been able to tell anything I cant bring myself to confront her. I know it breaks her heart when she sees her baby feeling like there's no way out. But right now I just feel like if I'm going to have these mental health issues all of my life I may as well just give up now. I have no quality of life, no friends (I cut them all off) and everytime I leave my house or do anything I just want to be locked back inside my room.

Just feel like giving it all in.

Thank you

Lauren

and this is the place to vent things like that. I'm sure we've all been there at some point. Heck I still drop into that hole. Are you on any medications? I can't remember if you've said. I would suggest going to your doc and either getting some or trying something else. (I"m actually taking that advice myself and seeing my doc tomorrow and seeing about changing things up a bit.) I find when I'm feeling that low and seeing nothing but black that I just have to hang on and things do improve somewhat. I honestly don't know what to say. It hurts to see how much pain you are in, please get some help. I'm learning that being on meds isn't so bad. And always remember we are here for you.
Take care,
K

Buddly I've been on and off meds since I was 14, but not right now. At the moment I'm having therapy, which helps understand why I feel like this. But every so often I just feel the huge void, ya know? I'm thinking maybe I should go back on meds for a while too.

I think you're right Spoz, meds may be the answer. Some of our bodies need them to function properly. I've been where you are and it is aweful. See your dr as soon as possible and keep posting here for support from people who understand. Sorry you are going through this right now, but remember that things always change and this will too.

It's Friday!!

Heather

TGIF

Got so much to do and so little time .... Everyone, have a great friday...and be good to yourself, you deserve it.

HAPPY 8 8 08 GANG

Hey Everyone,

Happy 08-08-08!!! I don't know why, but 8 is my favorite number, so today just feels like it is going to be a good day! I've been really tired lately, but I'm caulking it up to my body getting used to morning workouts and possibly getting cold as well. The last few days I've been super hungry too, so maybe it's part of my woman issues. Eh, who knows. I'm trying to figure out my insurance with my employer, and it's becoming a bigger hassle than I anticipated. I'm not sure what the issue is, but we're discussing it today so I guess I'll find out. The week has been pretty mellow otherwise. I ordered some vegan stuff online, which I don't do very often. Got some veg cheese (which is pretty good, and no guilt!) and some sweets. This stuff is just a treat for every once in a while, as I aim for fresh fruits/vegs, grains, etc. at my staples. Going veg has actually made my weight loss journey a lot easier (not my reason, though), so that was an added bonus! My coworker was trying to convince me to give her the chocolates and s'more, but that is MINE! This weekend, visiting family and continuing with the mellow-ness. I feel like my "up" time might be winding down, need to to myself to the doc before it gets out of hand...

spoz -- I read your post and it felt like looking in a mirror. I go through huge chunks of time where my life is a numb blur of saddness, fear, and tears. It comes from no where most of the time, since I was about 15. My mom is the same as your's as she gets very concerned when I'm down, so I mostly hide it from her. I love her so much and she is probably my closest confident (because, like you, I've cut most of my friends out of my life) but I know there isn't anything she can do to help, and it only ends up depressing her too. I can also relate to just wanting to stay at home and, when I'm out, wanting to go back. I think because it's my "safe place" and I don't have to put on any front when I'm alone. I've never been in therapy or on meds, just barely lived through a few down spots. I know this will most likely help, and if the meds have helped you in the past, you may want to consider them again. Someone else here said meds for "mental health" should be treated like any other meds (diabetes, arthritis, etc), if you need them then take them. I'm really beginning to see that I shouldn't have to suffer if I don't have to.

Lennie -- Happy (belated) birthday!

momof4 -- You're life sounds overwhelming. I saw find another husband that will help you out!

Sassy chick -- You're DH sounds like my mother, she is always buying me treats which I sooo do NOT need. Maybe, if what he wants is to make you happy, you could say instead of the "edible" treats, he could treat you to a back rub or a walk or something. I wish I had some advice on the veggies, but I'm mostly just choking them down myself. I can't wait to see if other's have advice!

sandyfanny -- it sounds like your dad's new wife has laid down the law! That was funny, I bet you were just eating that up!


And to everyone else who was or is having a bad/down/numb day, I am sending positive energy your way and wishing all a happy Friday! and a