oh leelea i am so jealous you are only 130#

i was BF for 11 days and no weight loss. makes me want to cry - instead i binged. i would love to weigh 130 but i am about 180. i have been making an effort to dress better and that helps as i feel better if i look presentable instead of wearing my fat clothes

it's sunny here today so i have to get outside and get some sunshine. cheer me up

hi stephie - what sort of assignments do you do? are you a journo?

ellis well done on throwing away the bad food. never easy. yes i am so happy the case is over altho it will be a mth before we get the verdict. i still feel pretty tired and need to get back on track

Thanks Stephie and Sweet_Pea.

Stephie, sending you lots of willpower for the weekend... Can you pick up any precut veggies or other healthy snacks etc from a grocery store to snack on? Sometimes just a little bit of planning can make a big difference in our choices. (do as I say, not as I do )

Sweet_Pea, that weight will come off, hon. Hang in there... you're doing great. Sometimes there's no rhyme or reason to when/where it comes off.

I've had a good day. Mostly because I spent the morning with my (formerly fat) sister and the afternoon/evening with a friend. I can't eat a lot in front of others... particularly when they're slim. I just feel like such an oinker, you know?

I hope everyone else is having a good day!

Not so good today. Ds and I went to lunch and I was craving and gave in. Oh well, I'll kick it into high gear tonight on the treadmill, if all goes well, and I won't talk myself out of it. I've been known to do that A LOT.

Ellis: I know about the sister thing. We both try to lose weight together, and her start weight is under my goal weight! And she still manages to lose more than me, with 3 little kids!

Sweet Pea: Same with me and the clothes thing. I weight about 180, and try to buy just the right shirts to hide it! I do have a few shirts that I swear make me lose about 10 lbs! I love those shirts! They are so hard to find, though.

Stephaniewilliams: When you go out of town and have to eat at a restaurant, remember to order from the kids menu!

LeaLee: My ds is 6 too, and I totally understand the fighting. Right now he is trying so hard to convince me he can have some cereal (it's 8pm) for a snack! His whining and poutiness makes my head ache! And to think, this is the age I teach! I'm not looking forward to going back to school.

Kate109: My mom has increased her protein too. She says it keeps her feeling fuller longer. Sounds like eating more smaller meals works for you! You're doing awesome!

Telemetrynurse: Wow! No sweets! You go girl! Keep up the great work!


Talk to you all tomorrow! Sending you good vibes on a binge free day!

Heidi

Hi Everybody!

I'm very VERY VERY excited !!! I have FINALLY lost another 5 pounds!!! WOOHOOO!!! I know it is "water" weight from the Atkins, cause I lost it in 2 days, but I'm still ridiculously happy to see the scale MOVE : And I still am NOT CRAVING SWEETS!!!

Heidi~ sorry to hear you had a rough time. It happens to ALL of us! You can hop right back on the wagon and on your !
You teach 6 year olds?!?!??!?! I kids but don't know how I could handle a multitude of kids at once... How many kids are in your class?
I hope you get some wonderful, well-behaved little angels who LOVE to learn!

Ellis~WTG on the control of throwing away half of the temptation food!!! YAY you!!! Personally, I would have to throw it in some nasty trash, or destroy it to render it inedible.
Congrats on having a good day yesterday! Hanging out with people seems to help you? Can you do this more often? I'm the SAME way. Don't wanna look like a in front of anyone!

Sweetpea~ Sorry to hear you had a binge. But you did am AMAZING job of staying binge-free while going though that stressful court situation!!! You should be really proud of that!!! Good luck!!! I know you can do this!!!
Yep, I'm doing the first part of atkins--the induction. I'm only on day 5. The hardest things for me has been giving up caffeine and artificial sweetners.

Stephie~Good luck on your trip out of town!
Ellis is SO right (our smart mod).....can you bring some healthy stuff with you? It really helps if you don't let yourself get starving...especially when eating out.

Lealee~ Good luck on your house! I can understand the dessert thing----I have NO control over sweets which is why atkins is helping me. You've been doing SO great with the dreadmill, I'm sure the water weight will come off quickly!!!

Kate~Congrats on still being binge-free!!! YAY!!!
I've also found that eating small meals more frequently helps keep my binge-beast sedated! WTG!!!

To anyone lurking........

Hi everybody!

Uhh, I guess I am going to be ill. I am sick, I feel dizzy, got a headache....It started yesterday morning after my workout. I went back to bed and slept for more than 20hours. But I am still not feeling well.

But I am still binge free....

So, congratulations to everybody binge free and for those who arenīt.

Hope everyone is having a nice day!

Kate

fallen off the wagon...
i was BF for about 11 days but the last few have been a mess! not enough healthy food either

You would not believe the weather. Yesterday it was so hot I was wearing shorts. Today it is bucketing down. There are puddles everywhere and the place looks like it could flood. Incredible contrast. I guess I should expect the rain – it’s winter after all – but after a beautiful day yesterday I’m a bit shocked. I went out this morning and planted a few things while the ground was soft and the rain could bed it all in but I got too wet. I was soaked LOL.

Other than that it;s been a totally lazy day. Didn’t sleep much last night but I did spend 3 hours sleeping this afternoon. Definitely the weather to be snuggled in bed. Plus it’s first day of TOM so always good to rest up. I get zits when it’s TOM so the extra sleep helps get rid of them. Plus I am bored out of my skull. Don’t feel like reading. Nothing on tv, don’t feel like playing bridge. DEFINITELY don’t feel like working, tidying or putting away washing. Although I did make the supreme effort of chucking everything in the dishwasher and turning it on. The dogs are bored too. especially Saffie. They’ve been out to play in the rain but of course it wasn’t a lot of fun! Jazz zoomed around and got soaked to the skin but other than that it’s been quiet for them too

ellis you make me laugh feeling like an oinker eating in front of others. i of course have absolutely no shame and binge anywhere any place and in front of anyone

kate hope it's just a 24 hr bug and you feel better soon. take care

holy cow elizabeth - 5lb - that is incredible. no wonder you're happy. so you think the change in diet has cut the sugar cravings? or is it sheer will power? a low GI diet sometimes helps my sugar cravings - but not always LOL

heidi - you go girl. rather you than me on the dreadmill. i've been known to fall off the back in sheer exhaustion (after all of 3 minutes) and the damn things make me dizzy. i get off and feel nauseous guess i have bad balance or something. anyway they are instruments of torture. first thing i'd do is bomb them. much rather walk outside on real grass but that's just me

Sweet_Pea, I'm sorry you've fallen off the wagon. Give yourself a bit of a break, hon. Lousy weather, TOM, acne... just be good to yourself for a few days, and eat as healthy as you can.
I was thinking about that this morning. I'm feeling a bit fragile at the moment. I've been socializing (not my choice) a LOT lately, and I really need some "me time", you know? And I thought, "How am I supposed to exercise and eat right when my mental health needs to come first?!?" I feel very conflicted, but I think I just really need to look after my mental health first, and do the best I can with the rest. I'm not a failure. And you're certainly not, either. Hang in there, sweetie.

Kate, I'm so sorry you're sick! I hope you can take some time to cozy up and look after yourself. Get better soon, sweetie.

Elizabeth, if I hang out with anyone else this week, I'm going to kill someone. I'm just not a social person. (although I'm a darned good faker. heh heh) I think when I don't get enough time to myself I'm in real danger of binging, because I feel that I "deserve" to be alone with a big pile of food. Stupid mentality, but there I am.
Congratulations on the 5 pounds, hon!! That's so encouraging!!!

Heidi, I hope you were able to get on the treadmill! I'm having to put mine away for awhile. We're renovating out basement tv room this summer (my gosh, we'd better hurry... the summer is quickly coming to an end!), and I've got to empty the room. Somewhere! I'm going to take my exercise bike up to our bedroom on the third floor, and I'll use that in the meantime.
You poor love... teaching 6 year olds. They're so cute, but they wear you right out.

How's everyone else doing? Any more non-bingers out there?

Hey guys, Doing Ok here I guess. TOM really knocked me off the wagon and I am now holding onto the reins trying to pull myself onto the horse. I have not journaled since July 24 but I have started that again today. Logging anything I eat...which today so far is 230 calories of junk but I am going to try to get back on track.

Dreadmill has been lonely for 4 days as well poor thing is calling my name and misses me but I don't miss it!! Well actually I do because I am so dang stiff and I pop nonstop from tight muscles.

Today is my day though I will get back on track and overcome this feeling of being off the wagon and dragged.

Kate I hope you feel better soon

Elizabeth WAY TO GO!!!!!

Sweet Pea...Im right there with you on your eating habits...I can stay in control for the whole month until about 3-4 days before TOM then I lose all control until its over then I can drag myself back up.

Ellis....don't worry...you aren't the only non sociable person on the board...All I can think about here lately is "OMG if we get the new house people will be over all the time while we are getting settled" I don't do holiday dinners at my home because If they come to Me I can't leave when they get on my nerves...if I am at their house I can leave whenever. We do have a few friends that come over once a month or so but to have someone over ALL THE TIME..or to be at someone elses house all the time?....no way not for me!!! and by the way I MISS COFFEEEEE

ellis i do agree with putting the mental health needs first, and not just because i have lifelong problems with anxiety and depression. i find if my mental health goes loop-de-loop there's really no chance i can get my eating in balance.

i also know what you mean about the socialising. i am pretty much a hermit (hence living in the country) and while i enjoy a small amount of people contact anything more and i get all peopled out. so take your time to get some "me" time and a bit of pampering

the pampering brings me to your "deserving" comment that is a biggie for me. i often think i deserve that nice gooey sweet thing or savoury or whatever. so i eat it and then ... you guessed the rest. what you deserve ellis is time out to read a book, sit in the sunshine (not here of course - it's winter) or massage your feet or something like that. i'm not sure if your bingeing is a reward or a punishment. i couldn't completely interpret reward in the context you put it

SLEEP!!!
i slept forever last night. almost 12 hrs. it was broken but i am shattered. i need to break this cycle. i'm not getting anything done. i have been sleeping heaps all week

one of the triggers for bingeing is that i ate fairly healthy during the trial. i didn't binge. i had lots of fruit and vegetables and IT DIDN'T WORK It didn't:

• increase my energy
• improve my mood
• improve my coping skills
• reduce my need for sleep
• AND MOST IMPORTANT i didn't lose any weight

Actually that’s wrong. It wasn’t the most important thing but it was the last straw. I just thought I don’t feel any better AND my weight is unchanged. It’s not working so i just thought why bother? why bother eating healthily when you don't feel better? okay better go now i am starting to get maudlin and feel sorry for myself

leelea hope you get back on track today. i'll be aiming to do the same

Hi everybody!

Ok, I am back on track again! I slept from Friday morning until Saturday afternoon (with just a few waking breaks because of eating etc.) and I am feeling better now.
But i ate quite crappy the last days....Not the best choices because I had no energy to really think about it and prepare something. But I will be back on track!!

Unfortunately I was on the scale yesterday. And guess what: I am up two pounds. Out of nowhere....I was so frustrated yesterday!! I read in the post about "Exercise myths" that it could be normal to gain a few pounds after you changed your exercise regime and your eating habits, but I was so....fed up with everything. Like "Oh, yeah, itīs never going to work for me!! I can give up!".
(I am so with you here, sweat_pea!)
So I decided to delete my weight tracker (- even though I love the cartoon cat....) and stop weighing myself. This time for real.
And I am just going on with my program.

And I am slightly and silently feel my depression come back...So I need to take the necessary steps to stop it before it gets really worse.

Sending to everybody- I guess here a lot of people who need it!

Kate

glad you're back on track kate

my depression is also creeping back and it's pretty bad. tearful tired and irritable. had to shut the dogs out of the lounge because i was getting hysterical when the tv wouldn't work and they were hovering. i wanted to bash the tv into tiny pieces and i wanted to scream at the dogs so i shut them in the kitchen until i calmed down. well a little bit. was still aggro

and i am sleeping all the time. may go see the doc but i don't think she'll change anything. hmmmmm. also been feeling dizzy lately. only thing i've eaten that is at all different is apple cider vinegar but i can't see how headaches and dizziness and tiredness could possibly be a side effect of apple cider vinegar???

Oh, Sweet_Pea, I'm so sorry you're down. I can completely relate to what you're going through, and I know how much you're hurting. I wish I could run over and give you a big hug and some nurturing.
I hope you can see your doctor... and I hope she DOES something for you. Please keep us posted on how you're doing, hon... I'm worried about you.

Kate, I'm glad you're feeling better. And yes... get on top of the depression before it gets out of hand!

Sharon, hang in there, girl. Get back on the treadmill and journal!
Yeah, I love my friends (and sort of love my relatives), but I could easily say to them all, "I'm busy this year, but I can fit you into my schedule sometime next year..."
I hope it's not too crazy for you once you get into your house.

DH and I are going to try tiling the kitchen backsplash today. I just know it's going to result in divorce proceedings...

Coming here and reading your stories makes me feel so much better about myself. I am just like you guys. It's comforting knowing I'm not the only one who:

feels little if any energy
is tired and depressed
loves to eat for calm and comfort
tries so hard, with no results
wants to throw in the towel, wondering "will it ever work for me?"

I went to the store and bought some bad, bad things. The thoughts of eating these things makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. You know the feeling, right? I was on pilot mode and couldn't stop! I need to feel good and be happy!

I hate diets. It will not work for me to deny and deprive, because I WILL give in eventually to the monster within. I'm weak and addicted. Whatever I choose to do to lose weight has to be permanent and forever, so it cannot be uncomfortable and/or hard work, no matter what the experts say. I will find a way where this is not hard to do, because the harder it gets, the sooner I give in to the food and comfortable habits. I will eat what I want, no matter how hard I try not to, or try to talk myself out of it.

So I will not deprive myself of the good stuff. I will eat less portion sizes and treat myself sometime during the day (probably hiding in my room where the kids can't find me and steal my goodies!). I will exercise daily. I will think of it like work....I hate to go, but I have to! I will only do the exercises I like, like walking and dancing.

I will do this my way. I am unconventional in everything I do, so sticking to someone else's plan will not work for me. I hate raw veggies and most fruits. I cannot cook. So when every person out there tells me to eat more fruits and veggetables, I cringe. YUK! Eating these things is just not possible, so I will find something else that works for me. There's got to be more than 1 way to get from point A to point B, and I'm not going to stop till I find it. I guess you can call me a work in progress! Aren't we all?


Heidi

hello all
heidi you summed it up for me lol. that's EXACTLY how i feel

anyway i am still tired and lethargic and i am just hanging around the house. don't even have the energy to write this note. i put a basket of washing around and did a couple of other things. mainly i'm just doing a bit of reading and loafing around. i also booked to see my doc. i stopped taking my current pills because i didn't like the side effects. when i take 1 i'm ok but 2 pills has a bad effect on me. i considered just taking 1 but knowing how bad 2 pills makes me has just put me completely off them!!!

i will come talk to you guys properly later

I'm worn out!! I had a binge fest today that equalled about 4000 calories total for the day

Then had a burst of energy and: Packed 5 boxes of house stuff (books,Xbox games, nicknacks, video tapes), Washed down the bookshelf and alphabetized the 225 DVDs we own, Mopped and waxed (twice) the living room (hardwood) Kitchen (linoleum) and Bathroom (tile), dusted the whole house, put up 5 loads of laundry, cooked a big dinner, cleaned off the computer desk, cleaned my bedroom, did dishes, and now my legs are aching and i'm just waiting till 11 when i can take my meds and go to SLEEPPP....I got alot done today but hate my cal intake.

Heidi I AM THE Same as you...I cannot stick to a stiff diet. My other problems is that I cannot treat myself with things that are in my house. If I treat myself I have to treat myself with 'out to eat" stuff, stuff that isnt going to sit in the house calling my name.

SweetPea...Do you get that down and depressed feeling each and every TOM? I know i do EVERY TOM I fall off the wagon and hate myself for it...it usually takes a week or 2 (or 3) to get back on track just to be knocked out again when TOM hits again....My Dr put me on Sarafem (Prozac) and it has really helped with the depression and down feelings but not so much for the eating. And BTW I am 132 now but I started off 2006 topping off at 162 (168 to Dr scales) So I have come a long way since then.

OK Its 10minutes to 11 and I am going to take my meds and go to sleep. The whole house is already asleep and my brain is fuzzy from all the junk food today. May not check in for the next couple of days...bank stuff and bill stuff to do.

good luck to all my friends here trying to beat bingie.....Harpo are you out there?? All you lurkers.....Will power and a hand of friendship to you as well!!