August Chick Chat :)
 

Hi Everyone,

I figured a monthly chat is better than a weekly (for now that is lol )

Whats everyone up to this glorious Monday, August 8th Day ???





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Hi, Leenie - I read on another thread it was your birthday this past weekend. Happy Birthday! I hope your back felt better and you were able to celebrate.
Thanks for the support Ellis and Alisha.
Ellis, congratulations on your anniversary.
Alisha - you had a close call. Must have been dehydration. But at least you kept to your program.
I start mine on Wednesday so I have another day and half of eating what I want. The strange thing is I don't really want a lot. Last weekend I didn't binge but did eat some of my favorite foods - bacon, quacamole, crab - so that later I won't be having regrets about not eating them. Now that I've made the decision I'm sort of anxious to get started.

Good Morning :)

Hi Rose, thanks so much for the birthday wishes :) What plan are you following, if you don't mind me asking.

Where is everyone, I know I know, exercising right :s:



:lol3:

Good morning all! :coffee:

Of course I was exercising Leenie! Happy belated birthday to you.

Welcome again to all the newbies here, please join me in the exercise thread here. I am lonely! :devil:

My sister is still in town, she leaves on Saturday. I chose to work full days yesterday and today. Work is way more restful than doing stuff with my mom and sister. I weighed myself at the gym today and I am up 4lbs from my last official weigh in and up 5lbs from my last unofficial. This is less than a week. Some is water, but I took my water pill yesterday and drank a lot of water. It doesn't even seem scientifically possible I did not eat that many more calories than I burned. Even if I didn't officially exercise doing stuff we were swimming and playing and walking and stuff. Argh! My body does not make sense. :?:

Thanks for all the kind words all. I see my mom all the time, but usually in small doses. When you add my sister and her two kids, then spend all day/night together it makes for stressful situations. The weirdest thing is, I was doing fine until they changed up my schedule. I had written up a schedule of our activities and when they started screwing around with it I got all flustered and ate too much. They do not understand how much planning ahead helps me. They just think I'm neurotic. :rolleyes: I know I am neurotic! Just deal with it! :lol:

Where did everyone go.... go .... go...?

1/2 day at work today and off the next two days. My sister leaves on Saturday. I love to see her, I just think two weeks is too long for a visit. 7/10 days would be much more sane.

I weighed in at 163.5 this morning, so now I am only up 1.5# from official weigh in during "the visit". If I can get rid of this last 1.5# before Friday I will have managed my maintain during "this visit" goal. We'll see.

I just got back from the cottage, gals! :wave:

Rose, thank you for the anniversary wishes. :) How did "it" go today?

Leenie, how's your back, darling?

Melissa... so glad you're going to be ALONE soon! ;)

Sorry... this is a quickie... will be back in tomorrow... tired and grubby...

Hello. Well I'm officially on the medical fast. I wasn't hungry this morning. Probably because of my large last meal (I was so full I had to skip dessert - I know I'm going to be dreaming of that lost chocolate eclair in the future). I ate while I watched Ray Milland in "Lost Weekend." :lol: The program I'm on is a medical fast. It consists of packaged supplements (like powdered Slim Fast Shakes), weekly weigh-ins, checkups by a doctor and a class in behavior modification. It's expensive, but I'm desperate enough to try it. I'm a little hungry now but I have four more shakes to have before the end of the day. I'm feeling a little sad right now, knowing I will not have food to fall back on. Well, one day at a time.
Melissa - good going on maintaining during a stressful time. By Saturday both your sister and those 1.5# will be gone.
Ellis and Leenie - thanks for your support.

Rosetta, good luck! :lucky:
I am so with you re: being desperate. :rolleyes: I'm pretty sure that tomorrow is "D-day" for me. I feel quite dreadful, and I know it's not just my med changes... I've got to stop torturing my body with bad food! :(

Sorta new, but not really
 

Hi there...mind if I just "jump in" here? I've been a member of 3fc for a long time, but had gotten away from it for a while. I haven't posted any where in months and realize how much I miss the support and camaraderie. I've been feeling really lost and discombobulated for quite some time now. Desperately unhappy because of my weight, but unable to do anything but "diet" for a half a day and then binge to make the pain go away for a few minutes...or hours, as the case may be! Meet my new best friends: Shame and Guilt! :wave:

I had gotten to the point where I hated going out of the house, even doing the day to day things, like shopping had become incredibly hard. Not physically, but mentally. I'm ashamed of what I look like. I'm afraid I'll see people I know, who will undoubtedly think, "MY GOD, SHE'S GAINED SO MUCH WEIGHT!" There are only so many things that fit me now. My gardens, so lovingly planted this Spring, are overrun with weeds and wilted flowers. I just haven't felt like it. I want to...and mean to....but don't.

I do get out sometimes though. I kind of force myself, but for someone else's benefit. I was tired of watching my son in front of a video game again so I took him and my nephew to the pool club last week. Yes, I mustered up the gumption to put a bathing suit on and get into the pool. I love the water. (prefer the ocean, but this is a helluva lot closer on a hot day!) ANYWAY. I was bobbing around the deep end of the pool, when I realized that I am totally buoyant! No treading water necessary when you are this size! It was kind of funny to me, but at the same time horrifying! I am so fat that I can be used as a flotation device! My son was amazed when I demonstrated for him. He sinks like a stone when he stops treading water. :o

That was a lightbulb day. I've been having them more and more lately.

I realize how lucky I am...I am morbidly obese, but I don't have high blood pressure, diabetes or heart disease. I can get around just fine. I don't have any shortness of breath. I know that if I continue down this path that these are the things that await me. I don't want them.

So, I feel as though this is a great place to get back on track. Lots of positive energy here. I'll need that!

Thanks for letting me ramble. It felt good just to get that stuff off my chest.

I'll be seeing you!

Kat, I'm so glad you're here! :grouphug:
I can relate to so much of what you're saying. :( I am absolutely mortified by the way I look. :( Now, when I'm sitting down, I rest my book on my stomach. :rolleyes: I've never been this big before (pregnancies aside), and it's horrifying. :yikes:
And the not wanting to do things... you hit a nerve there, Kat. I keep thinking that I'm too tired and too fat, and that's why it's such an effort to even go downstairs to throw in a load of laundry. Or to weed my garden (I'm sure my garden looks just like yours at present), or do housework, do things with my kids, or ANYTHING! But you're right... I can do it, but I just don't want to.

With the "lightbulb" moments, it sounds as though you're just about ready to go. :yes: I'm right there with you, hon.
Congratulations on going out and getting into the pool! :hat: That is such a big step, Kat.

I have this really good quotation somewhere that pierces my heart... I'll see if I can find it...

Here it is:
This is from http://www.coping.org/growth/accept.htm
It's very harsh, but it's the truth as far as I'm concerned. And I need to accept the truth.

2. Irresponsibility

"It's too hard and I want someone else to do it for me. So in the mean time since I can't do anything about it, I am just going to relate to food as I always have."

Irresponsibility is rooted in self-hatred, low self-esteem and a belief that you are a loser who is not worth the effort. This concept is fully explored in Accepting Personal Responsibility in the Tools for Personal Growth.

Irresponsibility and not taking responsibility for your actions may be due to being lazy, unmotivated to change and looking for a reason or person to blame for why you will never be successful in your dealings with food. This is the rationalizer's, excuse maker's, and blame shifter's modus operandi.

It is a sign of your refusal to grow up and accept personal responsibility for your own life.

You would rather blame your past life's tragedies for your current misfortune than accept that life is a series of choices which you have made.

You would rather obfuscate the message of the LET GO system to overcome powerlessness over food than accept responsibility that you need to take steps to change your life and your relationship with food.

You find it easier to complain about how complicated, difficult or obscure the message is than to heed the simplicity and purity of it to Let Go and hand it over to your Higher Power.

You would rather complain that this message sounds like religion or pious mumbo jumbo than take the time or effort to explore your concept of spirituality and Higher Power.

You are probably so unwilling to accept responsibility for your failure to achieve success in attaining a balanced lifestyle that you would rather blame the lack of entertainment value in the program or lack of motivational charisma of the class leader for your failure.

You are not willing to face that you are lazy and unmotivated. You are unwilling to face that you enter programs like this to "look externally" like you are doing something about your problems with food when in fact all the time you are in the program you are concentrated on criticizing, belittling or complaining about the program, the leader and your class members.

You probably never are willing to say: "I am not successful in gaining a healthy relationship with food and a balanced lifestyle because I have not made the effort to do so."

That would be too responsible an act, too mature and too honest for you to utter at this time.

oh, hell yes!
 

Yep, that was a bit painful, but true, nonetheless! Thanks for sharing, ellis! And thanks for the warm welcome! It's good to be back. I was drawn to the title of this grouop: "CHICKS IN CONTROL."

Taking responsibility. Being in control. Calling the shots.

It's up to me. Gonna do it this time. look out!

Today just might be, make that, WILL be the day I head out to the garden to give those weeds a yank. It's time.

Hi everyone! I'm sorry for the short hiatus there... our DSL at work went down (for the 95th time it seems) and I've been playing a LOT of catch-up. :fr:

Now then.. Happy belated birthday Leenie! :woo: I hope you got everything your heart desires and more! Did you have a nice day? How was/is your back doing? :?:

Melissa, I wouldn't worry too much about that poundage! :no: I heard once that when you exercise muscles which aren't used to being exercised, they (the muscles) surround themselves with water in order to facilitate the reparation process of the fibers which tear inside (i.e the 'toning' effect). This can temporarily increase weight, but it isn't the same thing as normal water retention - thus not easily expelled through diuretics, etc. I bet something similar happened to you. In fact, I bet in a day or two you'll hop on that scale and find yourself down 2 or more pounds from your 'official' weight. :dance: Don't stress unduly - you're doing SO incredibly well! :bravo:

Rosetta, I'm rooting for you! :cheer: Your diet is VERY similar to mine, with the exception that there are actual food supplements I can have, which are interchangeable with the shakes I drink. (They're all balanced nutritionally). However, I have opted to drink only the shakes for the first 2 months because I am trying to break my obsessions and bad habits with food. :coffee2: The first three days are the hardest. I had a terrible headache from noon on day 1 to the evening of day 2, :stars: however, I discovered that if I had a bouillon it increased my potassium and I felt worlds better. A bouillon along with a couple of ibuprofen did the trick and I haven't looked back since! I don't know if you can have bouillon on your fast, but you could always ask your doctor. :goodluck: You'll do fabulously and the money will seem like a drop in the bucket for what you achieve, I bet! You GO girl!! :beach:

Kat, welcome back! I so sympathize with you. You hit a lot of nerves with your post and I commend you highly for coming back to get the support you need. :cp: I've done the exact same thing. My eating disorder runs my life if I let it - until such point when those lightbulbs come on and I realize just how large I've become. :stress: Then I'd sit and wonder how did I let it happen? How did it 'sneak' on me like that? How could I NOT notice that things didn't fit anymore until I only had about 4 items I could wear from the waist down? :dunno: It's incredibly mind-boggling and yet it happens everyday. The important thing is that you're here now and, if you let us, we can provide you with the support you need to reach your goal. :balloons: You'll get there! I have a long road to walk like you, so if you need any extra help or someone to listen, I'm only a PM away or a post away. :comp:

Ellis, that was a very useful and quit true! :yes: It's a good reminder of what we can do when we put our whole self into it. Easier said than done, of course, but I guess it also serves to remind us that there is no easy way out! :wizard: Thanks for that, very much. :thanks:

As for me, I'm recovering from my little 'episode' slowly but surely. I'm grumpy because if I hadn't faltered I'd probably have hit the 30# lost mark, but such is life! :censored: I'm aiming for next Wednesday to hit it and moving forward. I guess there's no crying over spilled Whoppers! :burger:

Take care everyone!

Alisha :hat:

Whoppers? Did someone say Whoppers!? :D The first place we went when I left the hospital after giving birth was to Burger King for a Whopper.
Alisha, you'll get it off. Move on and don't look back, hon. :grouphug:

Afternoon, all. Ellis, thank you for the quote. It's similar to the conversations with myself I've been having lately and will continue to have. We have to look up from our food daze and face the root of the matter. I hope you've been able to get back on track. You, too, Kat.
Well, I've made it through a day and a half of the fast. Yesterday I was crabby and I will have to watch that. Also, I'm still in mourning for my lost food. The weekend will be the hardest because I've always planned it around food. What am I going to do with myself? No grocery shopping. No restaurants. No movie popcorn. Eek!
Alisha - thanks for your encouragement. My plan is about the same as yours. Nutritionally balanced shakes with packaged food to come after a couple of weeks. Like you, I plan to stay on the shakes for a longer time to distance myself from food. Plus it's so easy. No prep. All I need is a shaker, water and a glass. We can also have bullion as needed for the sodium. As for potassium, we are given a prescription for liquid potassium to take twice daily. A tip to vary the shakes: add extracts, such as walnut, almond, vanilla or grated ginger.

Rosetta, you're doing great! :hat:
You can do this, hon. :yes: Just take it an hour at a time, or whatever you need to get you through the weekend. And be good to yourself! Reward yourself with things other than food... a good book or magazine, a bubble bath, or other "pampering" things. :grouphug:

Late night soul searching...
 

OH, Rosetta! Truer words were never spoken:

We have to look up from our food daze and face the root of the matter.

How I can relate to that! Although, looking back at all the times I have tried to face the root of the matter, I'm still not quite sure what it is. Do I blame genetics? Nah, no one really fat as far back as I can see. Deprivation as a child? No, there was always enough to eat, even in our family of 5 kids. I was a chubby child, but slimmed down at puberty. I think the damage to my psyche was done by then, though. I never thought of myself as anything but fat. Even when I wasn't. Even into adulthood. My parents? Maybe somewhat. I do come from a family with alcoholism on both sides. I think that but for a simple twist of fate (hooking up with my dear husband, who does not drink) I certainly was headed down that same path. But I think that I just traded one compulsion for another.

Maybe it's time to look into OA again.

I should be sleeping, but the man is snoring so loudly, I had to get up. This has become a habit, I'm afraid! Although, I'm usually at work this time of night...my sleep pattern is hopelessly skewed.

Thank you, Alisha for your kind words! I will take any and all supportive measures! Hang in there to you and Rosetta both, with your liquid diets. A friend of mine lost a LOT of weight doing just that. I know I do not have the stamina. Did you say crabby? My family would be throwing Twinkies and Oreos at me after about three days!!! Eat! Please eat, you raving b!tch!

Who mentioned Whoppers, by the way?

My food has been good these past few days, thank God for the wonderful summer fruits: Peaches and raspberries and plums, oh my!

The snoring seems to have abated a bit...at least down to a low rumble. I'm going to give it a go. Especially since I have to be up at 8. We have tickets to a Yankees game. Still not sure if we can get tickets for the ferry, :crossed: or we'll be taking the one hour train ride into Manhattan, then the subway to Yankee Stadium. Hubby did NOT want to drive. It's going to be about 95 degrees and ungodly humidity. What, are we nuts? :yes:

Maybe I can sweat off a few pounds!

Good Morning :)

Hi everyone, how's your weekend going along? Mine is okay, I didn't do good dieting but not to bad for me. I wish I could last more than 5 days on a diet.

Anyway, Ellis, the back is MUCHO better. I had some nice :s: muscle relaxers and pain killers that really helped......well until the next time I move wrong lol. Thanks for asking. How are YOU ????????? whats going on?? did you get to see your doctor yet?

This weather SUCKS!!! yesterday our temperature reader said 105 degrees, and with the humidity its like walking into a sauna...G R double O SE !! Wish I had a pool.

You'd think with all the cleaning talk I do, my house would be spotless, but it seems like I clean the same thing over and over and over and cant get any thing else done LOL.

Alisha, 30 lbs !!!! you go girl. Thats awesome :)

Katrina, where in NJ do you live? I'm in bergen cty near the franklin lakes area. Good luck going to the city (or did you already lol).

Melissa, enjoy the family and hang in there :) just remember no matter what you eat, keep doing that exercise, it really will make a difference. (look who I'm telling to exercise OY VEY lolol).

Rose, how's today?? how long are you staying on the liquids?

Good morning, girls! :wave:

Ah... facing the root of the matter. Yes, I blame my mother for dumping her problems on me all through my childhood, for not being a mother to me, and for not recognizing my depression. THERE! :lol: Unfortunately, I still have to get a grip myself, and move on. :(
My mother is a fit, beautiful, 80 year-old. She weighs about 60 pounds less than I do, and STILL she's saying to me, "I'm so worried about my health. I must get this weight off!" :rolleyes: God help me.
Why can't I say to her, "LOOK!! You've had a good life. You're healthy. Take a look at your fat, unhealthy, depressed daughter, and maybe give her some support for once in your damned life!!!" :mad:
Phew! THAT felt good! :rofl: :lol3:

Kat, you've got to get your DH some of those little nose thingies that stop the snoring. :yes: They're very attractive. heh heh
Thank you for reminding to eat FRUIT! I ate quite well yesterday (until a smaller-than-usual snack in the evening. Still big, but better, at least!), but realized that I hadn't eaten a vegetable for... oh, I don't remember when I last ate a veggie! :yikes: Must get something I like, plus some fruit...
What fun living in NJ and being so close to "the action"! Have fun at the game, hon!

Leenie, I'm so glad your back is getting better. :)
Yes, I saw my doc, thank you. I THINK the meds may be working! :hat: I just need to up them a bit, I think. I'm much more energetic.
Speaking of energetic, WHERE is Melissa! :?:

Laundry in the plans today. Such an exciting life I lead. :D

How's everyone else! :wave:

Hi folks! I'ts been a while!

Leenie: Happy belated birthday!!

Ellis: I can relate to your last post. I have some pent-up hostility about my mother not recognizing my anxiety when I was little.... would have helped to have a little emotional support as a little one. Kickboxing helps me get the rage out! Feels good.... sore but good.

Speaking of which... I'm acting out. I feel myself feeling rebeliious (to who? I'm not sure!) about eating what I WANT (read: cookies & brownies). It's not so helpful when I get on the scale... and I'm trying to figure out what is triggering these episodes... then I just shrug and say to myself, "who gives a damn?!" I'm narrowing the window of rebeliion down... so hopefully I'll wean myself off of whatever is going on... it's just so annoying.

I hope the rest of you are hanging in there!!! All the best!

:lol: I love it, Wanderlust. :lol:

It's really difficult to pin-point the reasoning behind our wanting to eat/binge, isn't it? :yes: And you know, even if I DO figure it out, I'm often so tired and irritable by then that, like you, I think, "Who cares! I'm eating! Out of my way!!" :rolleyes:
Maybe there's something in that. For instance, I start getting tired around 3 in the afternoons (when the kids come home. Coincidence? I don't THINK so!! :lol3: ), and that's when I want to eat a ton of carbs. And that just makes me even more tired, and I'm set for an evening of snacking.
Maybe we need to journal (I hate journaling, but I know it's a really good tool) our moods throughout the day, and then prepare for them...

I'm "talking out loud here"... excuse me... :lol:
If I make myself a healthy snack first thing in the morning (like veggies and a good dip or something) and keep it handy in the fridge, then it'll be ready for my 3 o'clock blues. I can plop the kids down with a snack and get them to do their homework, while I take a half-hour or so to read and eat. Hmmm... maybe a little protein would be good right around then, too...

What do you think, Wanderlust? :D

:cb: They're gone! :cb:

Yay! I have my life back! Woo hoo! Sad, isn't it? But two weeks of my mom, my sister and my two nieces every day is just too long! I am up 1.5lbs - not bad considering some of the choices I made. I still have until Friday to get it off as my official weigh in day.

Welcome everyone! Katrina, Alisha, Roseeta, Wanderlust! Fabulous to see some new faces and have some great discussions.

I had my first training for the half marathon on Saturday. It was so awesome I can't even describe it. We ran three miles and it was raining the entire time. I love to run or bike in the rain. I just felt so alive and so incredible. I can't wait until this Saturday.

Hi all. Here it is, Monday. I love Mondays, really! Always a new beginning, and today is no different! I pulled fitday up and decided to start logging my food/exercise there again. I like how you can see how, exactly, everything breaks down and all your daily numbers at a glance. Good tracking tool. You can even journal there too. I posted all my goals and how I intend to meet them. Feeling positive and in control right now.

We survived the Yankee game, kind of! Good grief, it was so hot. We sat, baking in the sun for about 5 innings when it started to rain. BIG giant raindrops....ahh, they felt so good! The game continued a bit, through the rain, but they finally called a delay when it became torrential! We left our seats and went inside, where it was packed with hot, sweaty, smelly MANY PEOPLE. I really hate crowds of people...and since we figured the game would be called anyway, we left the stadium. It wasn't called...they continued after a bit, but we couldn't get back inside! So we hung out in the parking lot, like a couple of hoodlums, doing some great people watching and laughing a lot. Mostly at each other! 22 years of marriage and we still can act like a couple of dorks together. :love:

Hi, Leenie, fellow Jersey girl! I'm in Monmouth County, not far from Sandy Hook, the northern-most point of the Jersey Shore. Do you get down to the beach at all? I saw another Jersey girl here too....Hi, Wanderlust! What's your exit? We've got some Joizey delegation here!

Ellis, sounds like a good plan, preparing for the slump ahead of time. I often think I will do just that, and then................don't. Today I will. Thanks for the reminder. Are your kids in school already? My son is hanging on tight to his last two weeks of freedom! Back to school 9/6. :cp:

Thanks for the warm welcome, Melissa! Your training session sounds great. I'd love to do a marathon some day. I'm going to add that to my goal list!

Gotta run, I'm here about an hour longer than I had planned and I still have to get my exercise in today!

Hello, all. I made it through the weekend, but it was rough. Not because I was hungry, because, curiously, I wasn't, but because of all the emotional cravings. I had a lot of time to fill and didn't know what to do with it. I just read more than usual. I live alone so I don't have any obligations to anyone else. Turned on the tv to watch a movie - Hannah and Her Sisters - which revolved around several years of Thanksgiving dinners. Yikes! Went to see Broken Flowers yesterday and -- yup - there were several meals in that one too. The smell of popcorn didn't really bother me so I wasn't tempted. But it was all I could do to get myself home without stopping at the store for "just one good meal." Good thing I didn't because the weight loss clinic group leader had left a phone message for me and I had to call him back and report. I actually do feel better, my joints are less creaky and my bum shoulder doesn't hurt as much. I weigh in tomorrow night.
Ellis, I can sympathize with you. I had a difficult mother, too. She died over 30 years ago but I still feel the effects of her upbringing. Sometimes, with older people such as your mom, they tend to draw inward and become more self-centered. They feel removed from the problems of younger people, even their children. Maybe you can try not to take her lack of interest in you personally, it may just be a symptom of her age. By the way, good idea anticipating your afternoon slump and arming youself with a healthy snack choice.
Kat - The reasons we go for the food are so complex, we'll never fully know what triggers it. With alcoholism in your family, food may have been your way of coping. If OA has been helpful to you, then maybe you should try it again. You will get support. Sounds like you had a fun weekend despite the snafu at the ballgame.
Wanderlust - I think we rebel because we want to have our cake and it it too. (Or not have to give up our cake and still be thin.)
Melissa - whew - now that company's gone and you are running, I'm sure you'll lose the extra #.
To Leenie and all you other sweltering east coasters - our temps here in San Francisco for the last few days have been in the 50s with a wet fog. (I love it).

Hey there ladies! :wave:

Thanks for the encouragement kat. If you would really like to do a marathon someday I suggest signing up for information at the Team in Training website. I first heard about them 5 years ago and just signed up now. It is inspiring to even get their mailers.

Congrats Rosetta on making it through the weekend. That is always the hardest part for me. It has so much less structure than normal work days.

It continually amazes me how much I have to fight not to eat crap. My daughter asked for a hot pretzel at the mall, so we got it. Of course, she ate about 4 bites and was done. I brought it in the car because she said she wasn't done with it. (I usually try to throw stuff out instead.) I ended up probably eating 2/3 bites before I tossed it when we got to the gas station. It was probably only an extra 50 calories, but do that a few times a day and you stop losing weight. It is such a mental battle with me. :^:

Good morning, girls! :wave:

:lol: Melissa, considering the stress you went through having family for so long, I'd say you did VERY well, my dear!! :hat:
You're doing great with the training! Yes, I always loved running in the rain... it's so refreshing. :)

Kat, I love Mondays, too. :)
The kids aren't back at school until ummm... the first week in September. I was always appalled when parents would say they couldn't wait for the kids to go back to school, but now I'm in agreement... the summer holidays are SO long. Even my 16 year old daughter told me that she thinks the holidays should be split up. :)
It sounds like you had a riot with your DH. :love: I'll bet you had more fun than if you'd gone back in to watch the game.

Rosetta, you got through the weekend! That's wonderful, hon!! :grouphug: I hope the weigh-in goes well this evening. Whatever happens, do NOT get discouraged. We all have bizarre weight fluctuations, but that weight is going to come off! :yes:
I'm sorry about the stresses you had with your mom, too. :( I'm sure it sounds trivial to some people, but they have such a huge impact on our lives.

I'm gearing up for a better lifestyle. I've just had my new meds upped (they seem to be doing the ticket), I've got a LOT more energy, and I'm getting tired of eating poorly. Any day now, you'll see me spring into action, and my weight will dramatically drop. :D

Hi everyone! :wave: Sorry for the hiatus - our lover-ly internet went down (again) and I had to play catch up. You ever get that hamster on a wheel feeling? :mouse: It's like groundhog day at this office with our internet. Down, up, catch up - down, up, catch up.... :?:

But anyway, I'm glad to hear that everyone is doing well. Katrina, Melissa and Ellis - hang in there dahlings! I can speak from experience that even if you figure out where the food hang-ups come from, it still doesn't make it any easier to break them. I don't know why that is, :shrug: but maybe I just need more head shrinking. I know exactly why I obsess with food the way I do - only it doesn't seem to make any difference. :no: I can play head games with myself from dawn to dusk and it just doesn't seem to help. :cry: A bag of Tostitos and I had a fight over the weekend and that proved it. Dr Phil says that an eating disorder can never be cured - only managed - but ****, I can't even manage the damn thing. How frustrating. :tantrum: I haven't done any damage really, except for the fact that I just can't get to a 30lbs loss! I weigh in again tomorrow but I don't know what to expect. And you want to know the kicker? :kickcan: Eating crap makes me sick! :tired: It sets off my IBS and I've had trapped wind for two whole days but will that stop me the next time? (Gods I hope so, but probably not...) I thought surely it would be like aversion therapy - getting this sick and not wanting to feel this way again. Kind of like getting really sick on gin or vodka and then never drinking it again. :barf: Maybe I'm just doo lolly. :dizzy:

Melissa, you're right though. :yes: It is a constant struggle trying to deny food that 'calls you'. :coach: I just keep hoping that one day the struggle will become easier. Until then, at least we all have each other. :grouphug:

Hang in there everyone. I'm right in the canoe with you.

Big hugs

Alisha :hat:

Good afternoon. I'm starting to have food dreams. The other night I was buying pork chops, last night someone bought me a taco! :lol: Physically I feel so much better, but emotionally things are difficult. I try not to think too far in the future, to concentrate on the here and now, just getting through each day and reminding myself of the reasons for doing this. Now that I no longer have food as an escape tool, I have to face certain things about my life that I don't like - my job for one. That's where I have to control my crankiness.
Melissa - I know how easy it is to eat little bits here and there. In my office right now there are candy and nuts and I could almost absentmindedly help myself to one and have actually thought - one or two nuts won't hurt. But as you said, the little deviations do add up and they can be detrimental to our goals.
Ellis - glad you're feeling better. Daily life is so much better when you have the energy to cope with it and it's so much easier to lose weight when you feel good. I'm waiting to lose enough weight so I can start moving. That will give me more energy and make it easier to stick with my goal.
Alisha - I take it you lost the Tostitos battle. Are you back on your fast?

Hi all...I'm having a good day! Well, it's kind of hard to have a bad day when you sleep through most of it! I should mention that I work the night shift (11-7) and have to sleep during the day. Lately, (lately? For months now!) my problem has been that I'd come in from work, sit at the computer, and nibble, graze, and munch away til about 10 or 11, then go to sleep. :chin: Conditions not very conducive to weight loss, I'm afraid!

I had to go to the doctor last week because I had bronchitis...I HATE going to the doctor's with a white hot passion, chiefly because the first thing they do is weigh you! But I really was sick so I sucked it up and got on the scale. He did casually mention that my weight was up ( No! Really? :o ) and that he'd like me to come back for a regular checkup in about 6 weeks, since it had been about 2 years since my last physical. Oy

I am determined to lose some weight before I go back. And then to continue losing weight, of course! I'm ashamed to admit that I haven't been for my 'yearly' GYN visit in a few years or for a mammo either...all because of the weight. It's really time to stop letting my fat call the shots.

Rosetta: Ah, San Francisco! I love that city! My in-laws live in CA, about a 3 hour ride from SF, but we make the trip in every time we go...it takes my breath away every time I'm there! I think I may have left my heart there! Enjoy that wonderful cool weather...I AM jealous!

Ellis...I'm glad to hear that you're feeling perky! Eating well can only make you feel that much better...good for you!

Alisha...Those Tostitos are dirty fighters, aren't they? I can rarely win any battles with them! And you're right, I can blame anyone/thing I want for this weight issue, but it is up to ME to deal with it. Sometimes over-thinking the situation can just make you crazy(er). I'm in an 'action phase' right now....no more thnking about it...JUST DO IT. (thanks, Nike)

Melissa...thanks for the heads up on the Team in Training website...It looks great! I browsed there a bit and have bookmarked it for future reading and inspiration!

Time for me to whip up some kind of fantastic, healthy dinner. Heh heh. DH is at work, daughter is at work, I hear sonny in the kitchen fixing his own concoction. SO much easier to prepare for one! :cp: Time to go chop some veggies...

Have a good night, all!

Howdy ladies! :blah: Am I the early bird around here?

Alisha - How did your weigh in go? :goodluck:

Rosetta - I know exactly what you are saying about no longer using food as an escape. It has been a big realization for me. I started having mini panic attacks because I just didn't know how to deal with things. Instead of running off to eat chocolate chip cookies when I am upset, I have to deal with it! :mad:

Yay ellis! New meds! It is great to have energy back, isn't it. My daughter loves the singer Laurie Berkner and she has a song called "My Energy". We sing it together in the car all the time...

This is me, this is me, this is me and my energy!
I'm gonna wiggle my legs,
I'm gonna click my heels,
I'm gonna stop my feet,
Doo, Doo, Doo.....

You get the picture. It has kind of become a theme song in my head.

Just a quickie!
 

Sorry all but this will have to be short and sweet. Yes, yes, internet went down again, although this time we can blame the sub-contractor for severing the line with a marking spike! :mad: Sooooooo now that we finally got back up, I only have a moment before I close up shop (figure of speech), go home and die!

I drove to Orlando yesterday for a concert (just over 100 miles away) and I didn't see my bed until 3:00am! Needless to say I'm very tired and endless hours spent playing solitaire on the PC hasn't helped at ALL! But, the concert was probably one of the best I've ever seen and I found $5 on the floor (that paid for parking) so it was certainly worth the drive and lack of sleep.

Well, despite the tostitos war (I guess that's kind of like the war of the roses?) I hit 30 lbs today! I was so happy. Finally I can see ONEderland around the corner.

Everyone take care and, provided we're running tomorrow, I'll write more.

Hugs

Alisha :hat:

Well, the weigh-in went well last night. Down 11.8lbs! Despite that, I'm kind of down today and wanting some real food. Well, that will pass.
Kat - I know what you mean about doctor's visits. I have them regularly because I'm diabetic and need to have periodic blood tests. I never let the skinny nurse weigh me. I always wait until she goes out of the room and then weigh myself. I have regular mamograms but admit I've been slack about the gyno visits. Didn't like them when I weighed 120!
Melissa - Like the song lyrics.
Have a good evening all.

:flow1: Good morning! :flow1:

Hey Alisha, great weigh in - 30lbs down is a great milestone. Celebrate! :cheers:

Rosetta, another great weigh in - Fabulous! :hyper:

We are on fire here girls! :flame:

And just because it can't be said enough... GO TO THE DOCTOR! Everyone! Get your yearly physical, get your yearly papsmear, get your mammograms! You can tell the nurse not to weigh you, you are their customer! :soap:

Rosetta, what a brilliant loss! :cb: You should be so proud of yourself! I'M certainly proud of you chickadee! Weigh to go! :goodscale

I should be excited over my loss but, you know what? I'm not. I'm mad :mad: actually because I know that it could've been more if only I would STOP this NONSENSE! Between the fast food :mcd: and the tostitos.. :corn: oh jeeze.. I mean yeah.. I didn't gain and, in fact, lost 2 lbs, but still.. you know how it feels when you know you could've been down another 4 or 5 lbs if only... :tantrum: I still just don't get why I do this.. :?: even when the food makes me sick as a dog, :barf: kicks off my IBS, :stress: causes all sorts of health ills in general and makes me FAT, :sumo: I still do it. And, to make matters worse, I'm getting hungry on my program and I don't know why. :dunno: I know that this is what led to the breakdown but I get so sick of being hungry! :ink: The first whole month I was fine but then the last two weeks it's like I'm starving to death. :faint: If I'm satisfied (at least nowadays) I can nip my cravings in the bud but if I'm hungry... woe be tied! I'm off like a shot to get something naughty and sinful. :moped:

Anyway, that's my rant for today. :soap: Sorry folks.. just getting fed up with myself and my inner psyche that won't let go of it's precious food! I guess since I can't throw myself into the pits of Mordor :wizard: I'd better come up with another solution... any ideas? :sorry:

Thanks for the nice comments Melissa - that was kind. :thanks: You celebrate for me. I'm going to pout for being so stupid! :cry:

All the best.

Alisha :hat:

Hi guys-
I'm new around here and was wondering if I could join your chat. I have struggled with weight, ana/mia, and overeating for years... (I have been just overeating and steadily gaining weight for 3 years now). I finally got a nutritionist again and the first 2 weeks were rough, but I'm finally SICK of it... feeling crappy like this and being unhealthy :tantrum: !! The past few days I have stayed completely to my custom meal ideas (thanks to the nutritionist) and have exercised everyday. I think I'm ready for once :crossed: -- I just need support cuz this addiction to food is AMAZINGLY hard to kick (as I'm sure everyone knows).
Anyway, I hope to see everyone around the board! Thanks for letting me join in!

Good evening, all. This second week is harder than the first. I think because it's finally sinking in that there will be no real food in the near future if I am to get to my goal. It's funny how you blink and a year has passed but the individual moments can seem like an eternity.
Melissa - thanks for the cheerleading. How are you doing?
Alisha - You DID LOSE. That's the important thing. Forget the Tostito binge. Get yourself back on track. Keep the junk food out of the house and replace it with fat free, sugar free jello or a small apple. I'm technically on a fast but I let myself have one little apple a day. It satisfies my need to crunch something and is filling. Because I am really sedentary right now I don't feel too much hunger. If I do, I just have a cup of bouillion.
Boston - welcome, I'm relatively new to this group myself, although I have been posting on 3FC for awhile. That's great that you are working with a nutritionist. When you're tempted to stray from your healthy diet, remind yourself of how bad you felt and that for that particular moment you want to feel good.

Good morning. I think I am avoiding my Friday weigh in. I weigh myself all week so I know what I weigh (163.5). But I have missed the last three Fridays for no really good reason. I skipped the gym because I was tired. I went to bed late, my daughter woke me up in the middle of the night. And 4:40am comes around awfully early! BUT I have dragged my butt to the gym under similar circumstances so many times.

Bad night last night, I had cramps because I am about to get my period. Chocolate always seems to help that. First I had two mini Hershey bars and they were so good I had a regular size one and that was so good I had a bag of mini Hershey kisses. :o I had that uncontrolled eating feeling. The difference now, is that I know that is one night. It doesn't ruin my diet because this is not a diet, it is the rest of my life. It does not give me permission to now cheat for awhile because I screwed up. Right back on the wagon this morning....

Golly, it's just bustling in here! :sunny:

Melissa, you're having a rough day... :( Staying OP will make you glad later...hang in there. Sending you hugs, sweetie... :grouphug:

Rosetta, what a great loss!! :cheer: Congratulations, hon!! You must feel so inspired!
I know what you mean about individual moments seeming like eternity. Sometimes it's a battle just to get through five minutes. :yes:

Boston, welcome!! :wave: We're so glad to have you here!
How wonderful that you're working with a nutritionalist. That feeling of not wanting to eating poorly anymore is a huge breakthrough! :hat: I remember it well...

Alisha, how are you doing today, hon? I can so relate. I have IBS, too, but it doesn't stop me from eating poorly. The only things I absolutely avoid are raisins and tea. Big DEAL!! :rolleyes:
And acid reflux... even with medication for it, I lie propped up in bed at night because I've eaten poorly all day.
Sending you sympathetic hugs... :grouphug: And a big congratulations on the 30 pound loss!! :hat:

Kat, are you getting some weight off before that next check-up at the doctor? ;) I finally went for a physical this year... hadn't been for about four years, because I figured I probably had cancer or something, and didn't want to know. ;) Of course, I didn't.

Leenie, where are you, darlin'? :wave:

I am still FULL of energy! I'm currently expending most of it sitting on my big butt at the computer, but I am getting out and around again, and I'm doing gardening and some walking. Once the kids are back in school, I'll be a whirlwind.

Hi Boston and welcome to the site! :wave: All the people in this topic are so incredible - you'll love it here and we're glad to have you. :cp: I know exactly what you mean with the struggles. I've never been ana/mia but I do suffer with diagnosed binge/compulsive eating disorder and it's the hardest thing in the world to control. :ziplip: Why? :dunno: The gods only know. :angel: Nevertheless, we're all here for each other and that helps tremendously. Ensure that you check back often and you'll see what I mean. :flow1:

Rosetta - thanks so much for the support. :thanks: I was in a very dark place when I wrote that post and feeling so glum. :cry: Every bit of encouragement helps a lot! :yes: Believe me when I say that I know how hard it is to say goodbye to food. Thats why I spent the first 6 weeks of my program on shakes alone - to try and break that 'pull' that food seems to have over me. :rollpin: Unfortunately I'm not allowed any fruit :nono: - just one piece of fruit can throw me of ketosis and ruin my week for weight loss. Not to be a critic, but you may want to ask your doctor if that apple is okay. Your program is different than mine so it very well may be! :D I know that on my program I am allowed NOTHING extra with the exception of 2 dill pickles and 2 bouillon a day because any extra sugar or carbs will throw me out of ketosis (fat burning) and slow my weight loss. I feel like if I'm going to struggle without food then I sure as **** want to see results! :lol:

Melissa, I feel for you, I really do. :headache: I've had a few of those uncontrollable eating binges over the last two weeks :mcd: but it's not the slip but, rather, what you do to recover from it and you're right on track! :bravo: I say way to go! There will always be times when we slip up, but the true essence of maintaining weight loss will be the ability to have a splurge and then to refrain from continuous splurging. You have just proven to yourself that you can put yourself back on track and I think that's a wonderful achievement! I'm very proud of you! :cb:

Hi Ellis! I'm doing alright actually - thanks so much for asking. :spin: In fact, I think I finally sussed what the problem was with my hunger. :dance: I'm due my depo provera shot today and I think it was my hormones getting all out of whack. :dizzy: I remember a friend in England who was on the shot and about 2 weeks before she was due for another one, she would turn into a regular war horse! :tantrum: You couldn't say boo to a goose around her without her going nuts. As it turns out, she needed a break from the shot for awhile and she's fine now. However, if it did that to her, it surely must mess with your hormones. It IS birth control after all. I only have it because of terrible menses but the effects on your hormones are still the same regardless of intentions, right? :joker: Anyway, I'm due to get mine tonight so we'll see how it goes.

IBS is the most terrible thing, isnt it? :barf: I don't have acid reflux but I did suffer terribly with over production of stomach acid, which made me feel ravenous (even when I wasn't hungry) and it hurt a LOT! Way back, when the doc put me on Prozac for my eating disorder, those pills would get lodged in my throat sometimes and burn for all ****, :flame: so I think I can relate to what it must feel like and I'm sorry. :sorry: Why in the world we put ourselves through this for the sake of crappy food I'll never understand. :shrug:

But, I'm pleased to say that I'm back on track. :dancer: My new shipment of supplements came yesterday and, for the first time, I've ordered some of the food supplements to try and curb my hunger. I have the oatmeal (vanilla berry and maple brown sugar) a box of Tropical Punch, some chocolate pudding and even one box of Caramel Nut Crunch snack bars (plus shakes, of course!). I needed a bit of variety because the shakes were getting sickly. :tied: So far I've had the oatmeal (which was good!) :T and the Tropical Punch (it was okay..) :halffull: and I'll have the pudding in a bit.

I was kind of upset today though. :mad: You see, I post on another board solely reserved for those people who are on Medifast. (No advertising here - I'm only on it for informative purposes of my program) I hadn't realized the shot thing yet so I was trying to see if anyone else had experienced severe hunger after being on the program for over a month and how they dealt with it. :tape: But, instead of offering support to help me through it, it got turned into this huge lecture session about me not having a doctor's supervision (because I'm doing the complete fast) and because I'm having 5 supplements a day and not 6. :blah: Well the damn book that came from the company says 5 or 6, and 6 supplements are usually for active people. Well I sit behind a computer all day at work :comp: so I'd not call myself very "active". I haven't even been to Curves this week. :o It just put me in a bad mood (I'm better now!) because I can't help it that I don't have health insurance. I specifically don't want to do the 5 supplements and 1 meal program because then I'd be looking forward to that 1 meal all day - thus focusing all my attention back on food, which I'm TRYING to break. :tantrum: No one could get this. Why is it SO hard for people to understand? :rolleyes: Things don't always work out as we'd like them to, such as me having no insurance, but damnitall I'm doing the best I can with what resources I have. You'd think they'd be all over me like white on rice to try and help, especially for that reason, but NOoooooooooooooo. They want to lecture and make me feel like I'm at death's door instead. Very helpful. :sp:

Anyway, I just wanted to vent that because it only served to enforce how glad I am to have found you all. :grouphug: Truly. It sounds so contrived and dramatic, but no one has EVER judged me on this thread or made me feel badly about myself and that is priceless to me. Thank you all very much! :hyper:

So, I think you all deserve a big pat on the back for dealing with whatever issues you may have in a positive and productive way, despite any slip-ups. We're only human after all. To err is human and to forgive is divine, especially to forgive one's self. :love:

Many hugs :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug:

Alisha :hat:

It's been a long difficult day. I'm tired and depressed at the thought of a long weekend without real food. Ah, well. I got myself into this state.
Melissa - good that you were conscious of what is going on. Once in awhile we mess up, but as you wrote, it's no excuse to continue on that path. I hope your weekend is better.
Ellis - I was diagnosed with IBS about 8 years ago. It was very unpleasant. But after a couple of years the pain disappeared and I don't have any problems in that regard. I don't have acid reflux but do have gastroparesis, which means because of my diabetes my stomach muscles don't operate normally. If I don't take medication I wake up in the morning with the previous night's dinner still in my gullet. I hope you can work out a balanced diet that will ease your discomfort. A :grouphug: to make you feel better.
Alisha - I'm sorry you can't see a doctor, but I know very well what it's like without health insurance. I have it now but the bleeping HMO won't pay for my program so I'm paying for it myself. I'm not supposed to have apples either but I'm having one anyway. However, it may catch up with me since they take blood and urine tests every week and they'll find out I'm not in ketosis. May have to give them up. Sigh. What's with the pickles? Salt? I have to take potassium twice daily for the electrolyte balance. I'm taking liquid potassium which is by prescription. Are you taking anything. You might want to at least take some tablets. (No lecture intended.) I know what you mean about having one meal a day. I tried the Slim Fast Program doing Lean Cuisine for dinner. I started adding things to the Lean Cuisines so that the calories started adding up. That's why I am on this fast.
Well, chicks, time for me to head off home to do the laundry. (ick).

Have a good weekend.