But now, I am a wreck around sweets!!! And sugar/candy/chocolate/cookies etc seem to be my only problem. I haven't had any desire to cheat with any other kind of junk. I don't overeat my regular foods. We have a cookie tin at work, and I eat several every work day. Every single night, I say "I am NOT going to eat a cookie tomorrow," but I always do. And I'm like that whenever I'm around sweets.
I'm really frustrated and mad at myself and literally terrified. Right now I'm at about 135lbs. I've been trying to get back to 125-130 for about three months now
I'm amazed that I haven't gained more, but it's not even about the number on the scale right now, it's about my behavior. I don't even remember what it feels like to resist foods, I feel like I totally lost that ability and I want it back.
