I joined this site a while ago but I didn't post much. I have a hard time with forums sometimes because posting can be a huge thing for me because I'm so shy. I usually end up convincing myself there's really no point since I can't contribute anyway, so I end up becoming a lurker.
But I just feel so lost right now and I don't know how to fix it.
I've never wanted to admit to compulsive or emotional eating, partly out of shame, but mostly because it feels like I'm making an excuse for my own choices. I feel like if I say I'm a compulsive eater then I am trying to say it's not my fault.
And I know I have to assume responsibility for my actions, but I think I have a deeper problem too. Especially after reading the definition of compulsion "a strong, usually irresistible impulse to perform an act, esp. one that is irrational or contrary to one's will."
That is exactly how I feel sometimes. Like this afternoon I ate several chocolate covered marshmellow eggs that I didn't even really want, and that I knew I didn't really want, but I felt like I needed to eat them.
I guess what the point I am taking forever to get to is that I could really use some support, which is the reason I joined this site to begin with, but I don't know how to make friends or fit in. So, I guess I'm asking for some help, if anyone can.
You have come to right place if you are looking for support. This forum is awesome and so are the people. Don't be shy . . . speak up. This is the first time I've been this active on any kind of forum and I believe it will be the difference between success and failure for me . . . and I will succeed.
You are definitely in the right place! there is so much support and compassion to be found here.
The first step is acknowleging your eating habits. you dont have to focus on a label, but focus now on how you feel when you are eating (where you bored? anxious? upset?), and what you eat when you feel as you do. That is the first step.
Please don't be completely hopeless. I know that's a much easier thing to say than do. I've been here for a while and don't post much for some of the same reasons as you.
However... in the last few days... I've decided that I'm going to come here every day that I can. I've also decided that I'm going to find at least one post to repond to -- no matter what. Maybe I can give a virtual hug, maybe I can give a tip, or maybe I can just share someone's journey. I've read a few posts today, but your's was the first to which I felt I could contribute. Thank you for giving me the opportunity.
This thing we're trying to do is a journey. It's today and tomorrow and the day after that. It's one pound less, it's two pounds less. It's five minutes of walking, it's thirty minutes of walking.
Please just try to keep one foot in front of the other. Come back here. Post. Find something to share. Find something for yourself. But, just keep coming and trying!
I try to post daily, even if it is not anything original or stellar going on. That's not what this forum is for to me. To me it is for giving support and receiving support.
And what I need support through is the "blah" of every day living. To help me NOT skip workouts, NOT binge on ice cream when the day went rough, etc.
Please Post! I believe that everyone is unique and can contribute something different and useful. Plus, even if you're just agreeing with someone else, it's a great way to be supportive!
I just wanted to let you know that I have been a lurker here for about 8 months, and your post inspired me to join and post a reply. As everyone else has said, I don't think you could find a better place for support in this journey!
I've never really wanted to admit my eating compulsions either, but I have found that, by admitting it, I am much more aware of when I am exhibiting that behavior. This awareness makes it more likely (some of the time, anyway) that I will be able to control it.
So, I guess what I'm trying to say is that I think it's a really big step to admit it and post about it! Good job
Hey there, Olivia. No need to be shy...we are all in THIS boat together and the more chicks rowing the less likely each of us is to drown in it!
You've made remarkable progress already...a few Easter goodies won't do you in. Just get back on your plan. You've made a huge step already to ask for help, which takes a lot of courage.
Is there something in your life that makes you want to eat? For example, if you are angry at someone, do you go home and "eat at them"? I used to do that with cigarettes...when I was upset, I smoked at the thing that bothered me, and in the process, I wasn't getting even, and I was fixing anything. I was only hurting myself. By understanding why I felt like I needed to smoke, and by talking to folks on a quit smoking forum, I got through the quitting smoking of it all and learned better ways to deal with (some) things. Maybe looking at food that way is the same for you?
Anyhow, I've rambled and rambled, but the short story is that you are not alone. You are with a great group of folks who understand and are ready and willing to help and give support!
If you're able to speak up, and reach out, you're not hopeless. By posting here, you have already set about bringing about a change.
This will not happen immediately. You won't stand up after a session online reading posts here a completely changed person & hallelujah, I'm cured, I'm cured & all that stuff.
But you will start to think about things & remember what you've read, and the change will happen gradually.
One way is coming here & telling us what you did. But tell us more. Tell us the story of the afternoon that ended in the eating of the marshmallow chocolate thingys. And maybe, together, we can all figure out why this happened, even though you knew what you were doing. It's a puzzle to work on. We can help with that.
I'm reading a great book about complusive eating by Geneen Roth. She also writes articles in Good Housekeeping magazine, which is where I learned of her. The book I'm reading is Breaking Free from Emotional Eating. You'd probably be amazed at how many of us lurk on this board and eat when we don't really mean too (and I'm definitely in that number).
I'm feeling completely hopeless...
