[paris81]

So I feel the need to confess yesterday's binge. I was doing fine until the afternoon. It was just after I had lunch (veggie burger, carrots), so I wasn't hungry at all.

I decided I wanted to treat myself to some Twizzlers, so I went looked into the pantry and the Annie's mac and cheese caught my eye. I bought it the day before as something to treat on sometime, and I got the whole wheat kind, I was planning on making it some day, and eating one serving, freezing the rest to enjoy it some other time.

Then I saw the Peeps (you know, the marshmallow things). And I thought, I could have the Peeps, some Twizzlers, and eat the mac and cheese for dinner (the whole box), and it would be a little binge, too much food certainly, but not the end of the world. So I stood there a bit, debating.

Then I made the conscious decision to go for it, which I feel is worse than those automatic binges. I knew what I was doing. I did it anyway. And of course, it didn't stop with just that. I had the mac and cheese early, not for dinner. Then I took a nap because I was so full. Then I woke up and, although I was still quite full, decided to go all the way and order a pizza and fries! AH!

So I ate all the fries (wonderfully salty with creamy ranch type sauce). It was an order meant as an appetizer for several people, so a lot of fries, and most of the pizza. And I was fully aware of what I was doing the whole time, I just didn't care. AH! Now I'm mad at myself.

But today, I'm going to eat healthy. Even the thought of having the leftover pizza in my freezer was killing me, so I threw it in the trash and put dish washing soap over it.

So I'm back on the wagon, and it's okay, and I know now that I can't yet have mac and cheese in my house.

[SoulSurvivor]

Hey,

It's so easy to slip up, I know exactly what it's like. There have been times when I've started a plan and I suddenly get an urge for some junk food and I give in whole heartedly. I'll eat everything I can get my hands on! But the difference is that I'd never have the guts to confess it and that's why I have respect for you because you have come to admit it and that takes alot!

It's just all a learning curve, and right now I know that I can't keep junk food in my house in case I want to binge and I go overboard! Maybe you should give someone the sweeties??? Just in case you go into binge mode again.

But otherwise, good on you for getting back on track, today is a new day and a fresh start =)

take care
xx

[paris81]

Thanks! It is a learning curve, but it seems like the urge to binge never goes away (from what other long term members of the forum have said). But I guess I have to know that I can't keep certain foods in the house. Luckily, I don't have to give anything away because the trigger food is gone, since I ate it! I guess that's a good side? Not really, but...oh well!

It does feel better to confess, try it next time.

[UniquelyNormal]

I saw in someone's signature "it doesn't matter if I fall 1000 times as long as I pick myself up 1001" How true!!

I know that extra guilt of knowing I'm making the wrong choices & doing it anyway. It's so hard to break. If I knew the answer I wouldn't be here. All we can do is support each other and strive to hold onto control.

[wiosna]

Originally Posted by paris81

And I was fully aware of what I was doing the whole time, I just didn't care. AH! Now I'm mad at myself.

I am the same - sometimes I just eat like the world was to end tomorrow! Despite being totally aware what am I doing and that it is not right - I still just eat and eat and can't stop.

Yay for you for going back on track today!
I am trying again tomorrow...since today I slipped.

[One2ResqU]

What matters is that you realize it. Everything is ok and now your back on track. Everyone has slip ups here and there.

Also I give kudos to takingthat left over pizza and putting it in the trash and then putting dish soap over it

[ajowens]

Good for you for junping back on the wagon. Its one day. One major binge and now you have to kick butt to get back on track. I am impressed that you pulled your self out this fast. Sometimes i feel so guilty I get stuck in that cycle for days!!

[LotusMama]

When I read your post, I felt as if I was living the binge with you. I have done it so many times myself. More and more, I am coming to realize that the biggest part of losing weight is mental rather than physical. The good news is that you got back on track. In my book, binges are only really detrimental if they pull you off track. In other words, it is not the binge itself, but how we react to it when it happens that truly matters.

Carry on!

Cheers,

J

[paris81]

Originally Posted by jrmohr

When I read your post, I felt as if I was living the binge with you. I have done it so many times myself. More and more, I am coming to realize that the biggest part of losing weight is mental rather than physical.

This makes me feel so much better! It's true, it's totally mental. People always have this stereotype that those who are trying to lose weight are always hungry because they're not allowed to eat, but I'm never really actually hungry (unless there's poor planning involved, but never because "I'm not allowed to eat") It's not about physical hunger, it's about mental hunger.

Thanks to everyone for your comments! This particular confession post is a bit old, and I've slipped up a maybe two other times since then, but I'm picking myself back up and I keep losing, so that's good. My goal now to is make the slip-ups more and more rare, and it's proving to be quite a challenge! But I think I can do it.