Hey everyone,
I found this site last week and decided I HAD to join. My highest ever weight was 297 and until last friday I had lost to 188. I had an all out binge that lasted 3 days. Unfortunately Im sad to say I now weigh 198lbs. I was/am so disgusted with myself. I think the binge started b/c I feel so gross in my body. I have an enormous amount of skin that sickens me, Im not where I thought I would be when I was about to reach my goal weight of 180, and Im in a weight loss contest (been in 3rd place since it started) and my father got onto me about not winning. I have always used food as a way to bury feeling and to get back at someone when Im really just hurting myself. I also have the problem of guys hitting on me or trying ot flirt with me. While Im not used to those things occuring it was making me feel good about myself until my husband starrted accusing me of seeing someone else. I never respond to the catcalls or anything but I have been telling my husband about them b.c it makes me feel good. I told him from now on Im going to go to work, eat, and watch tv, to **** with everything else. Generally I just pick myself back up after a binge but it has never been this bad before. I know once I get back in the right mindset I will get back on track but that still does nothing for my food addiction or prevent me from binging like this again or worse. Just thought I would share on my warped sense of thinking.
Today is a new day - put the binge behind you and move forward. Easy to say, I know. Someone has a good signature line - something about blowing your diet then saying "I blew it" and bingeing is like slipping on the second step, saying "I blew it", and throwing yourself down the entire flight of stairs". That one speaks to me.
You have come so far, and accomplished so much - you can do this.
As for your DH, he is probably feeling quite threatened by the new sexy version of you - especially if he has perhaps let himself go a bit! When you were heavy, he probably felt very secure that you would not, maybe COULD NOT stray. Now he's seeing you through the eyes of other men vis a vis the flirting/catcalls, and it's scaring him. Understandable. So my advice is, you don't have to tell him about the flirting. But as long as you're not reciprocating inappropriately, enjoy the catcalls - you've earned them, girl!
I hate, hate, hate, weight loss contests. They often backfire because they generate more negative energy than positive. Please forget about that. Losing weight isn't a race, it's life-long endeavor. Who cares if you lose x pounds faster or slower than someone else? SO not the point of it all.
A lil background nad hopefullywill address everythign I want to from the 2 posts.
My husband is 6' and 135 lbs, he tries to gain weight but cant. Really makes me sick. I dont reciprocate but inside Im smiling really big about the flirting. I normally tuck my head down and quicken my pace.
As far as the weight loss contest, I knew going into this that it would be harder for me than everyone else. I did it b/c it was 3 free months at the gym and I wanted to get to my goal weight of 180lbs. I would love to have the makeover and shopping spree b/c I feel I have really earned it. I went from a sz 20-12 in the past year and really cant afford to keep buying clothes. I work in a business office so we have to maintain a certain level of attire. I do know what you mean about negativity, I feel like Im killing myself to try and win and that may be way every thursday Im exhausted and have been binging more often.
It used to be I would binge some gain a couple of pounds but get right back on track. I have never binged this bad before. I know what led up to it, but it still doesnt help me not be angry at myself.
Well, just remember, this binge, no matter how big, will only put a few pounds back on. You have accomplished so much already, a few days of overeating will still only make a small blip in your overall progress. The sooner you stop the binge, the sooner you can undo the damage. Or if you're just really not feeling comfortable in your new bod, maybe try maintaining for a bit, until your head catches up with the rest of you. Relax your program a bit, don't have as many restrictions that you're obviously tempted to break right now. We all have to learn to maintain eventually, so maybe have a little go at it now.
I agree, you can overcome this. It is just a blip. Remind yourself of that.
And, maybe have a chat with hubby about this whole issue if possible (tho I am no marriage expert.......).
I completely know how you feel. I have yo-yo'ed anywhere from a size 7 to the 18 I now wear. Anytime I lost and felt good, my fiance had something negative to say if someone noticed me (though he always has something to say). It feels good when someone looks at you and wants your bod and damn it, it should. You have come a long way and you deserve the attn!
As for the binging, take a deep breath. I have learned tomorrow is another day and look at how much you have accomplished. What is working for me is mini rewards-like on a token economy. (This also worked for potty training my daughter lol). I went to the dollar store and bought a glass jar and acylic stones. For every pound I lose, I add a stone. If I put in X amount, I get a reward-a new book, lotion, etc. I used stickers a long time ago, but my daughter keeps stealing them all I know its corny but its a good visual aid.
My all out binge
I know its corny but its a good visual aid.