Ok so a small rant. Since I have gone public with my intentions of starting again on my weight loss and fitness endeavor, it has become again painfully clear how much people love to sabotage a good eating plan. Everyone at my workplace knows I am trying to lose weight and eat healthier. We all go out to dinner last night for a company function. All manner of food and desserts are shoved in my face with the typical "One bite isn't going to kill you." However, one bite will not help me, either. My change in workplace and type of work is a main reason for my weight gain. It is like a buffet there, and I went from a labor type job to a moderate activity job, and my calorie intake stayed the same and then went up= instant weight gain! I have received nothing but challenges with coworkers who wish to push food in my face. Pizza, ice cream, cake (major binge food), candy bars, soda, brownies, home cooked meals and more. Have any of you experienced this recently? I know this is an ongoing phenomenon, so share with me and make me understand this. Is it jealousy? A control attempt? What is it? Tell me your stories.

It's human nature in an attempt to control you. Are you controllable? You decide that.

This is the reason I never tell anybody I am on a diet, as soon as you announce thet you are on a diet the diet police will appear. They will monitor every bite you take and make comments or entice you with food that is not diet friendly. You have to learn to say no, in the most forceful way possible.If this doesn't work take the next brownie. pizza , ice cream ,whatever, walk over to the garbage can and throw it in be sure they see you do it.If they give you a bad time remind them that you said you didn't want it.

I don't know why they do that.

I keep it to myself, and if anyone pushes I am ok telling small white lies. That my doc wants me to watch my cholesterol for instance. (which doc DOESN'T?)

That gets them to back off. I don't feel the need to explain the real deal of PCOS/IR/hypothyroid. It's much easier to pick something everyone understands and I don't want to get deep in my personal health biz with semi-strangers. YKWIM?

Hang in there. It will blow over.

A.

I agree with bargoo. I NEVER tell anyone I'm on a diet or eating healthy or anything. When you lose weight, they monitor you anyway. But if they don't know what your plan is, they can't say "aren't there too many calories in that?"

NO ONE (other than the awesome 3FC community) knows I'm a calorie counter. No way.

It opens the door up to too much judgement and control and monitoring. And I really don't like it. When I lose weight, I'm silent until someone drags it out of me that I've lost some.

People can't help me lose weight, not really. And the more they know, the more they hinder me (at least that's my experience). Intentionally or not, it makes it harder.

I don't know why people do that, honestly. But maybe try this:

Them: you want some?
You: No, thanks.
Them: Oh, come on. One bite won't kill you.
You: No, really, I don't want any.
Them: How can you not want any? Come one, just a little.
You: I've politely said 'no' twice now. I'm not sure why that's not enough for you. I don't want any.

Just keep turning them down politely but firmly. If you give in, they'll learn that you WILL give in and push more. Seriously, I've had it happen.

Good luck!

i had major sabotage issues with the other half - but it really looks like he's coming around: today, he grilled steaks for himself and our daughter and thawed out (the correct amount!) shrimp for me. i never told him how many; all i knew was he looked at the back of the bag and said "isn't this the stuff you eat?"... "okay, so it's 80 calories?" and i said yes and thought no more of it.

maybe he'll get laid one of these days.

LOL @ threenorms!!!

@brandis - I deal with lots of sabotage from my mom , who I live with... It is soooo hard to resist and I am still learning how to say no effectively and not feel bad! I don't know why people do things like that but it must be some sort of control factor. I gained a lot of weight when I had a job in a medical field and we CONSTANTLY had someone buying us delicious food/baked goods. Try to resist and don't tell them your "secret"

I agree with LiannaCole. The best approach is to keep repeating some version of "no thanks" like a broken record. No explanation required.

F.

I used to work in a hospital and it never ceased to amaze me how poorly we all ate! When most of our modern diseases are food and lifestyle- related. People would bring in pastries all the time and you were expected to jump up and down and chow down as though you had no access to the stuff yourself. And if you didn't want any it was a bigger deal than front page news.

I've learned to not tell anyone if I'm on any special 'diet' - because the response is usually negative, and I hear about 'too little protein, too much fat, the fiber will make you sick, you won't be able to maintain, Dr. Oz/fuhrman/phill/ magoo doesn't agree... So I'll say something like I just ate/ am nauseus/ tired/ full/ allergic/ whatever.

Then when you drop a couple of pounds, they go nutz again. Asking ho much? Was it difficult? Was it intentional? Ugh! I never give weight numbers - I would usually say ' oh, you think so? Thanks. Or 'I have to wear this outfit more often' Of course, with close friends it's different, but not at the job.

I am not sure if its "sabotage" but it could have that result. People at my workplace like to comment on my food. I just laugh it off but this losing weight thing is HARD! It would be nice to have something encouraging said!

Someone went past my desk the other day and I had home made dahl on rice sitting there. (Actually very tasty!) They said, "Is the cat sick?" Now that's kind of off-putting when you are about to eat your lunch!

Or friends who will go by and say, mmm...that looks good...and they're taking the micky out of my carrot sticks and tomatoes or something...again I just laugh ...

But gee this can be hard some days! I am so glad I have a place like this to come to and read and share with my fellow calorie counters!

Lee

I LOVE dahl Those work folks are just rude. I envision something like:

-is your cat sick?
-why do you ask?
-your food looks.....
-why would you say something like that about my lunch.....

really deadpan. not angry, but hold them accountable for their nasty stupidity...

Brandis - I don't know why people are like that, but as you can see, they are, from every state, including mine, lol. My boss knows I'm on South Beach, has told me how 'skinny' I am (I'm not) yet he tries to push a Mike's Hard Lemonade on me each Saturday afternoon (what he calls 'the reward'...yes I know it's illegal to drink on the job, let's tell HIM that!)

"C'mon, Hol, it's a Mike's Light."
"Thanks, but I'm trying really hard."
"Not even one? Look, it's only got (xx) carbs in it."
"Really, thanks but no thank you."
"It's only ONE..."


A customer asked for some pork roll, which we don't have. I said to the customer, 'oh, I love pork roll'. My boss turns and looks at me, and says, "not on YOUR diet, you don't." WTF?

and one more -

Once a salesman offered me a little sample of some kind of pastry bar. I politely said no thank you. He said come on, just a bite. Again I said no thank you, with a smile. Then he comes right up to me, and does a speech on how people set themselves up to binge when they deny themselves. I said, but I don't WANT any, I'm fine... still with a smile. He continued!! I took his wrist, the one that was holding out the treat, started to apply pressure, and still said smiling NO thank you. He left

that is an awesome reply!!!

I don't really have any co-workers at my office so that helps with the food pushing.
For the most part friends and family have been super supportive. The weird part for me is that my husband will tell our friends how many pounds I've lost. It's nice that he is proud of me, but it feels weird.

When people do try and push food my way, I usually respond by asking them if they know how many calories is in that particular food or beverage. It usually shuts them up!

I just say I'm feeling sick and leave it at that. Can't force someone to eat if they're not feeling well.