I accidentally did who knows what and lost my post, so this will be brief. (Quell the hurrahs...) :) ... Very light food day today and I'm hungry now - will make toast or something because my stomach is growling. I went with small meals and no snacking because it was a busy day. Got in a full 9+hour workday in between everything else, getting started very early, and was able to work remotely with no issue, so that's a relief. Mondays are the busiest. I have felt so hungry the last few days, I feel like my jeans should be sliding down my legs. Alas, not the case...

6CrowsGold - any suggestions for encouraging him to take medicine that they need, but really don't want to take? His pain meds need to be in his system continuous, but he fights it and then suffers greatly later and it takes ages to get it settled back down. If I come on too strong, he will push back stronger.

Bill - Who do I need to talk to in order to have a plate of chocolate covered strawberries appear here for me? :) Sounds lucious!

Hi Beck Friends,

Off to hotels for 2 nights tomorrow. I will be so happy for a 4 day weekend at the end of this week.

Struggling over food much more than I want to be. Yesterday and today were not stellar. I know what needs to be done- slow down, make a plan, and think things through.

Hoping to report in on Thursday that the rest of this week went better than the first part!

:grouphug:

unexpected
 

Coaches

After the receptionist at my dentist's office finally caught me on the phone last week (I ducked her for 2 YEARS) I was in their office today for a cleaning and a checkup. Good=no cavities. Bad=bone loss, teeth "tipping":?: periodontal disease and no plan of action for me other than 3x a year check ups, get a waterpick, and floss and brush and keep up the routine at home and maybe, but it will be unlikely, that my teeth will remain with me if I live another 40 years.

It was an odd visit as last time I was there they were pushing several options at me. This time, with a new dentist, who didn't even introduce himself, and a new hygienist who I liked way more than the other one-part of the avoidance of going there-they were like "oh well. Nothing can be done. We just hope to keep the status quo but don't expect you/it will happen." (BTW not what they said but how it felt). DH said it reminded him of the time he went to the big medical clinic when he got diagnosed with diabetes and he felt like everyone just wrote him off with a "here's a big fat guy and he's not going to change or do anything about his health-don't bother." I never knew he felt like that. I did feel like that at the dentist and I guess I deserve some of that, I guess, but the receptionist urged me to get a 2nd opinion and she said she would if she was me. So I probably will. Anyway all this to tell you that with my newly cleaned teeth and alarming prognosis I was very wary of what I would eat once I got home. It became clear to me, again, that sugar = poison and it just turns to acid asap and with my deep receptive pockets around my teeth it's just fuel for the acids down there that I can't reach and all that "food", all that crap food I eat, fuels all that acid that's eating my bone and what do I get out of it? Nothing. It is empty of nourishment. It gives my body nothing and in fact helps remove bone from me. Has been slowly doing that for years. So at least if this process is going to happen, no mater if I slow it down or not, at least I can choose to at least nourish. It's sort of a no brainer. And I should not be consuming out and out sugar ever. That's so very bad for me it's so obvious that I have no defense for doing that. Perhaps finally the consequences have finally piled high enough that I can't ignore it anymore. That would be a good thing and I would welcome it.

Better go. Have a good night.

Lunar eclipse (shame we can't see it)
 

Coaches

I have had a bits and pieces day. Had to take the car for a service and sit and wait while they did it. Was going to read work but decided to start reading the Diet Fix which filled the time nicely - still not at the "Fix" section. Then worked some, then to the acupuncture session, then came home to work in the rain. Pleasant to avoid the office. Will be there tomorrow for my long, late day. Think I will take leave on Thursday to add to the Easter weekend. I am seeing the dragon lady Rheumatologist on Thursday and had blood tests done. Not sure what the results are because my copy hasn't arrived yet. I hope my inflammatory indicators are OK and I don't need to go back on steroids etc. Then we have the whole bisphosphonate issue to fight about - I really want to avoid it but have done nothing to find a counter argument yet - no time really. I am cobbling together meals this week - just hanging on for a break and some quality planning time.

BillBE - we crossed in the ether last night. Strawberries and chocolate are pretty luscious. And very Spring. Love the idea of Easter Baskets with fruit and healthy offerings. Those products look really yummy (and very unavailable here)

Tricia - One more pound - they are flying off. You are doing well and positive thoughts that you will reach that goal in the next 15 days.

6crowsgold - Sorry for dramas re DS - hope they resolve. But you did really well to stay OP. LOL at the truth of "I wouldn't paste a strip of bacon on my hand if I cut it, so food won't fix this problem either!" I have to remember that.

Gardenerjoy - Waiting for Day 10 with bated breath

Nationalparker - you are right - your father needs to maintain stable blood levels to achieve good pain relief. Not sure how healthcare works in the States but someone on the palliative or pain management team needs to give him a talking to. Too difficult for family to draw the line. Men are so difficult with "pills". If they cloud his consciousness I understand his reluctance. He wants to be with you for as long as possible. But if they don't he needs to suck it up and take them. Not sure how you achieve that.

CeeJay - sending good thoughts that you will have a few good days on plan while you travel. Looking forward to hear from you on Thursday

Onebyone - dentists do like to catastrophise. But whatever it takes to keep you away from sugar - if that works grab it with both hands. Interesting that your DH disclosed how he felt at the hands of the medical profession. It is shameful that they are so stigmatising of groups of individuals.

Credits
Ate on plan today - Yes
Planned food for tomorrow - somewhat - still deciding what to take for lunch
I logged food as I ate it - yes
Weighed myself and logged it - yes
Did planned exercises - ~8000 and 18 active minutes
I didn't eat standing up - 90%
I checked in with my diet coaches - Yes
Listened to motivation recording - yes
Made time for diet and exercise - missed gym again today. Don't feel well and had acupuncture so came home to enjoy the rain

Tuesday - Titanic Remembrance Day
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Set my alarm to watch the "Blood Red Moon" peak this morning at 3:00 am EDT - only to see a cloud cover. Drat. Fortunately, there'll be two more within a year or so. Hope the rest of you had better weather. (Sorry Australia, the sun was on your side of the globe for this particular dance.)

Learned, perhaps once again, that I'm perfectly capable of self-delusion. Felt terrific all day that my pants felt loose - even though the scale isn't falling all that rapidly. 'Twas a wonderful feeling; walked with my chest out a bit and a touch of smug in my attitude. The waist is the true measure of the body's response to sane eating. I supposed it was due to my diligence in exercise - even though, according to my records, I'm only doing that good enough. Thought maybe my body was just catching up. Alas, turned out that I'd put on a pair of larger size pants - of course they felt loose. CREDIT moi for thoroughly enjoying the feeling all day.


onebyone – Ouch for the reality of aging teeth. Kudos for facing it since diligence now has benefits despite previous history. My dentist has me using Clinpro 5000 tooth paste for the evening brushing. It has extra Fluoride but also Tri-Calcium Phosphate to help the enamel. I pay him $25 for the 4 ounce tube, but see it on line for less (despite "Prescription required").

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Early and short response, LOL.

CeeJay - Beck, herself, couldn't have written it better, "slow down, make a plan, and think things through." Kudos for keeping perspective.

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – Yay for 5 weeks without having to prepare classes. Kudos for 9800 steps - I couldn't go to bed with that number without pacing out the next 200 somewhere, LOL.

nationalparker – A full workday on top of everything else is amazing focus. Kudos for all you're doing with a "Very light food day" included.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Congrats on yet another pound gone forever. Thanks for the links to pictures of your common hummingbirds. It's easy to like the curve in the bill of the Broad-billed.

6crowsgold - LOL at, "I wouldn't paste a strip of bacon on my hand if I cut it, so food won't fix this problem either!" - that's a new perspective for me. Gonna steal that one. Sending supportive thoughts for the whole cycle of drama, difficultly, good news, and no resolution with Kudos for not using food to avoid feeling it all. LOL at "dragon lady Rheumatologist" - what a great visual.

Readers -

Hi Coaches!

I returned from our trip Sunday evening to snow and ice with a tweaked back. I managed to get to work yesterday morning *credit* yet we had hostess/waitress who was more than willing to let me go home. I visited my chiro and feel better today. Food was ok during our trip but more than usual. I got right back to my strict regime yesterday and will continue one day at a time.

My newest task that DH finally wants to become techno friendly so he can email his buddy we just got back from visiting. It's been occupying my internet time. It's the first year since we sold our businesses that I haven't had my taxes done so I'll drop a check in the mail with an extension today.

onebyone, my DH and I have both made big dental turnarounds. I found the waterpick to be extremely helpful....much easier than flossing. Routines are helpful and I found the "teeth" one to be helpful, too.

Gotta run...work is in 25 minutes.

Good Morning, Coaches.

I am struggling with Ceejay with food. It is so disappointing to me that I went 11 days OP, overate at a couple of family dinners, and am now two pounds heavier than when I started the month. My mind is screaming UNFAIR (and whispering "What's the use. Eat what you want.")

The healthy way to look at it is that the new food plan I was trying out was too restrictive and my body jumped way back that other way. Good. I learned something.

I must still find a food plan that is comfortable for maintenance. I am going to investigate the new Weight Watcher's plan this morning. I am technically a lifetime member so it won't be much upfront capital to check things out.

gardenerjoy: Just finished Galileo's Daughter. The biggest impact for me was how constrained her whole life was - cloistered at ten years old and yet she had the same range of emotional experiences as any of us. I take my freedom for granted.

nationalparker: It is tough when great emotional weights come out in petty grievances.

6crowsgold: cute about pasting a piece of bacon on your wound - although I wouldn't put it past my son to do anything with bacon.

GosFordGirl: Good luck with your tests.

Welcome back, Lexxiss.

BBE: Lol with the pants shenanigans.

Still not making it to Day 10 of The Diet Fix. In the meantime, some of you may appreciate the photo of the new garden tractor with mower, tiller, and snow plow blade. This will, one day, result in a larger vegetable garden so it has something to do with my healthy eating.

WI: -0.4 kg, Exercise: +30 705/1500 minutes for April, Food: 100%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

Fast Day Tuesday.

OP so far but real stinkin' hungry!

CeeJay : Hotels and meal plans are always tough for me!

BBE: Yes, the "Super Size My Pants" feel good technique always works as a nice pick-me-up!

gardenerjoy : If it counts, I just transplanted my basil seedlings--it's my "crop" this year!

nationalparker: My Dad was very much his own man during those months; I'd offer a suggestion and wait for him, never pushed. My dilemma was trying to keep his weight from dropping and I had to hide fat in everything and hope he'd eat it.

onebyone: Sugar is worth shaking. I wish I could (!)

GosfordGirl: Sounds like the weekend will be a good time to regroup and re-plan. Sometimes I just look through my food journal...

Lexxiss: Super kudos for food being better than usual on a trip. Trips are a huge challenge for me.

maryann: That's what I like about Beck, being able to look at a plan that's not working and tweak.

Best to everyone!

Hello, coaches! I feel like I've been taking and not giving on this site here lately. I appreciate the good vibes and have had another OP day. Dad had a bad night last night - I thought at one point he's slipped into a coma and was scared. Able to rouse him and today has been better. I aggravate him by focusing on his meds/times and he says that bothers him to see me worried, so I say, well, take your meds! :) He pushed back today and I said, oh, I know you'll do this because you LOVE ME and smooched him all over his head and he ended up half-smiling and shaking his head like, what a goofball she is. But I don't want these weeks/months to be confrontational and even more stressful for us. We'll see. It's early yet in my visit - just going on the end of the first week.

I truly have been feeling as if my eating light (!!) here should have resulted in me dropping major pounds, but I suspect that's not the case. WHY does it come on so dang quickly and take forever to disappear? :) And I'm sure we've all wished worry would burn more calories, right? ha ha

Able to get in another full day of work, but tomorrow will be dicey. I'll track it. I think I'll be taking some sick time tomorrow as we have a lot of appointments at dr. offices and some coming to the home.

Loved the loose pants with puffed chest, Bill. Funny!

Maryann - I'm with you on the "it's not fair!" thoughts - it ISN'T. And...well, why bother is typically my next thought, as well.

Gosford Girl - Thank you for the insight; I don't understand pain control and am frustrated by his dismissal of it, to the point of being intelligible and confused. I hope the dr. tomorrow stresses the importance of keeping the chemicals in his system without missing doses. He's on morphine and his eyes look haunted when it's wearing off/worn off.

Hello Coaches,

Today was a hungry day. I ended up using some of yesterday's neglected calories, which I hate doing. We are heading into the summer swim season and need to make some decisions this week about teams and competing. Everyone is tired here from rising in the middle of the night to see the red moon. Still have to go take pup out for his last walk of the day, then off to bed. Personals tomorrow.

Wednesday - National Librarian Day
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Grilled salmon steaks for dinner initiated our new small Weber grill. It worked as advertised. We grilled on 'High' then had to put them back to adjust the raw remaining inside. Turns out that there's an instruction card that suggests 'Middle' for all fish - in fact for almost everything except steaks. Certainly was easy. DW served dark green Kale and purple potatoes with it, making a visually appealing presentation. CREDIT moi for an on plan day as well. My Beck moment came when I'd served my planned three dried figs in my breakfast fruit bowl and there was only one left in the package. Every fiber yelled take that one, too. Figs are sugar bombs, however useful their role as fruit. I left it in the package, CREDIT moi, with the thought one extra being OK supports the thought that two extra would also be OK. And so on. Can't wait until peaches and blueberries arrive so that I switch away from my winter dried fruit.

Walked, CREDIT moi, despite wind and threatened rain. Wind blew strong enough to warrant using the chin strap on my hat. Was surprised when it got lifted off my head anyway; the strap did keep it around my neck. I made it home before the rains started seriously. Then it rained all afternoon, even lightly while using the grill on the patio before dinner.


Joy (gardenerjoy) – Super toy! Do you get your turn to drive? Why, Yes, it's a medical expense toward healthy eating - tax deductible for sure just like medical insurance.

Debbie (Lexxiss) – Ouch for a tweaked back. I'd guess that it wasn't worse because you're such an active person.

maryann - Shuddering at "What's the use. Eat what you want." - I recognized that one. Kudos for responding with a re-evaluation of your food plan. And by the by, Congrats for being a Weight Watchers Lifetime Member - that's a major achievement.

nationalparker – My admiration for working so hard to find the spoonful of sugar approach to encourage your dad to take his meds. Kudos for "eating light (!!)" - your scale will get the message in its own good time.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Yay for getting to see the Blood Red Moon. Averaging your calories over a week doesn't seem so awful to me.

6crowsgold - Double Kudos for OP when "real stinkin' hungry!" LOL at "Super Size My Pants" feel good technique - should be a standard technique in any Feel Good About Yourself book.

Readers -

Wednesday done
 

Hi Coaches

This is a very quick check in and tomorrow I will switch to the morning

It was easy to plan lunch - because there was none - it was a fast day and I had forgotten. I did stick with it today and had a small Japanese meal tonight but the salt may well get me on the scales tomorrow

I am planning gym tomorrow as I am feeling a bit better - will go before or after the doctor appointment. Looking forward to buying some fish and getting organised for the weekend. Steps not bad (8000), food not bad (a few off plan sultanas tonight)

Will check in tomorrow. Have a good day coaches

Wednesday.

Yesterday's fast got completed and then I proceeded to eat another 250 calories. I made myself write down the three junk food servings that made up the cheat and am sitting here looking at it and reminding myself how badly I want to see a good weigh-in Saturday.

Back at it today, but what a hungry week I'm having!

I went to a cooking class last night called "Strange Name, Great Taste" taught by a caterer from England. We had Toad in a Hole and Spotted Dick. They were tasty! I got thrown off my routine, but I just wrote a plan for today that looks doable.

Still not getting back to my book. Soon.

WI: -0.45 kg, Exercise: +30 735/1500 minutes for April, Food: 70%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

BillBlueEyes: I did drive the tractor! One of the things DH liked about it was a normal steering wheel. The driving lawn mower he had before was steered with levers on each side and I was afraid to touch it. There are times when it will be useful for me to drive the tractor while he's doing something else so it will be handy to have me reasonably comfortable. It's still not the same as a car though! There's one pedal for forward and a separate pedal for reverse. There's a brake, but in practice you just take your foot off the pedal and it stops -- kind of like a bike. The brake pedal is more like a parking brake.

Hello to all, just a wave to let you know that I am back from vacation. I did pretty well with food and very well with exercise while on vacation. I ran on both days that a treadmill was available, which makes me awesome, and did vacation-type exercise the other days -- loads of walking, some hiking, and even a few hours of sea-kayaking (although my kayak was the equivalent of the pony ride at the horse farm). My before-Friday-weigh-in-so-it-doesn't-count looks promising. As long as things don't go south tomorrow (and I don't see why they would), Friday should see me back on track after my 1.5 pound gain heading into vacation. One of my goals for this coming week is to post consistently so I hope to see you all soon. Warmest wishes for all you lovely people.

Hello coaches,

Wednesday, pizza day, here again. I think I'll pack something else again. I need to run errands part of the time the boys swim as the pet store was out of the type of dog food we normally used last time I stopped by. Need to do my DVD this afternoon.

6crowsgold Kudos for being so close to half way! Bummer for a hungry week.

nationalparker Wishing you the best as you work with your dad on his meds.

CeeJay Hoping you've had a good week and been able to plan/follow through.

onebyone Bummer about the dentist with bad bedside manner. I've been looking into "tooth soap" lately. The theory being that if you get your teeth "really clean" and don't rub away the enamel with abrasives that your saliva has enough minerals to fix your teeth on it's own (even make cavities go away). LINK

GosfordGirl Looking forward to hearing good news about your inflammatory indicators and the helpfulness of acupuncture. Kudos for a good fast day.

BillBlueEyes LOL @ your pants story. Good endorphins for the day :) I agree about the summer fruits, so looking forward to them!

Lexxiss Ouch for an injured back, so glad you are feeling better. I agree that a water pic is easier and better than floss.

maryann Hoping WW does the trick for you.

gardenerjoy Awesome new tractor. Had to look up your strange foods. Glad you enjoyed them.

flnu :wave: welcome back and great job on good vacation food choices.

Still Wednesday.

I have a 4 day weekend coming up for Easter. Everyone will be home and Big Events abound, so my posting may get random. Reminding myself I need a plan for non-routine days!

Happy Easter/ Passover!

Hello! Not a good day here for my dad, I was hoping that yesterday he was on the upswing, I guess it'll be like a pendulum - some up, some down. Only was able to get in a half day of work today; thankful I've built up a lot of sick time over the years. More confrontation as he gets more frustrated with the pain, his body breaking down, and me hovering, trying to assist. He is skeletal now. His shoulder bones are poking up sharply through his jacket. I feel almost guilty for being overweight while he's struggling to get anything down.

I'm not eating enough during the day/evening and finding myself HUNGRY about 10 or so. I will snack on some 35 cal/cup popcorn and relax in a bit.

Credit: Picked up a bag of Sonic's ice (tiny balls) for my dad; thought it'd be easier to let melt in his mouth ... and passed up everything else on the menu. Tater tots were calling to me... "You've done light this past week ... indulge...you deserve it..." and I disregarded their siren call.

DH keeps telling me how terrible the longterm statistics are for my dad's cancer. Last night I had had it and just said I don't want to hear this anymore because I KNOW it and it does nothing for me. It's not denial - it's just that I don't want to be dragged down every time we talk. He understood. Credits to him for humoring me.

Coaches

Really tired tonight - I am sure it is a response to eating rubbish today. I had lunch at a favourite dumpling place (Din Tai Fung - they are everywhere) because one opened at the mall near the Rheumatologist. I was irritated after I saw her. But I went to gym nearby as I had planned. And after that I went to eat dumplings. That wasn't so bad but then as I was shopping I had more off plan food. All of this stuff was full of carbs and wheat and now I could go to sleep face down on the keyboard. Moving on - I went to Tai Chi today for the first time and it was pretty hard work. I didn't have a clue what the patterns were but tried to follow. I think it will e.v.e.n.t.u.a.l.l.y help with the balance and leg weakness issue because that is the focus - but it won't be over night. I am not the most patient person but I need to give it a go

The Rheumatologist has put me back on steroids, higher dose than usual, for the joint swelling and pain - oh well - it will be nice to be more comfortable. I also let myself be convinced to go on IV bisphosphonates for osteoporosis (it is only once a year) but they make me nervous. And I will be joining the parade going to the dentist. You have to get things in order before starting the therapy and get the all clear

BillBE - LOL for pants story. We missed the "blood red moon" too because of clouds in the east as the moon rose at dusk. I love my weber grill. I think I need to take cooking lessons from your wife. Credit for leaving that forbidden fig fruit

Maryann - hope you are having less of a struggle with food - credit for not translating unfair as a license to eat. Hope you find that food plan

Gardenerjoy - hope you make it to day 10 eventually! I need to see what it is about - and it is the last day of the fix isn't it. Love the tractor! And it is great that you will be able to drive it. Your cooking class sound fun

6crowsgold - the fasts do seem to get harder over time don't they - unless I am busy I am suffering through them and sometimes snack in the evening on the rebound. I too am REALLY looking forward to my 4 days off starting tomorrow - Friday

Nationalparker - I am sorry to read of your father's increasing frailty. Credit for doing what family does for each other and bearing witness. Being able to playfully cajole your father to do what he needs to do is a credit. Hope the pounds drop but as usual they will do as they will!

flnu - welcome back. Your time away seems pretty on track so hope your Friday weigh-in cooperates

Tricia - sympathies for a hungry day - a few of mine lately have been like that. That dog sure gets a lot of walking. I love that he is like your little diet pal - that you actually got him as a walking partner. That seems to be working!

Credits
Ate on plan today - not at all
Planned food for tomorrow - No - was going to buy fish today but could not park! Will find something for tomorrow
I logged food as I ate it - no
Weighed myself and logged it - yes
Did planned exercises - ~8500 and 17 active minutes
I didn't eat standing up - 50% - ate something in the car - not technically standing up but...
I checked in with my diet coaches - Yes
Listened to motivation recording - yes
Made time for diet and exercise - gym - check; tomorrow - nothing planned beyond dog walk

Thursday
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Two walking excursions, CREDIT moi, including walking home after dark - always wearing my winter coat. After a couple of warm days, even mildly cold needs the winter coat. Came across a FREE box of partially used legal pads on the curb as we do in my neighborhood. I immediately took them home; took a few for my own doodling; let the two kids next door take as many as their father would allow them; then let the mother of two across the street take the rest. Warm feeling for getting usable paper into the hands of kids who have an infinite need.

On plan eating, CREDIT moi. During my evening with friends, I sat before a coffee table for two hours with dried nuts, figs, and cranberry bread that's crisp like biscotti. I took none, being aware that this is a biweekly affair and it's useful for me to just stick to my plan for 'none.' No one notices that I don't eat. This always surprises me since it's a regular Sabotaging Thought that folks will think it odd that I'm not keeping up.


Joy (gardenerjoy) – You made me google both Toad in a Hole and Spotted Dick. Gotta love the splendid British names for food. Congrats for training as a tractor driver. There's travel money to be made by plowing your neighbors' driveways after you're done with your own. (I just looked up 'biweekly' because I can never remember whether it means twice a week or every two weeks. Good grief! Why do we use the same word for both? How does one distinguish?)

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – Kudos for taking up something new, Tai Chi, to make working balance fun. Ouch for your "dragon lady Rheumatologist" pushing drugs even when they're what your body needs.

nationalparker – Kudos to you and your DH for working through the difficult feelings of dealing with the present without ignoring the tough thoughts about the future. Supportive thoughts to your dad to find a balance using his meds that works for him.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Seems sane to avoid the temptation for too much pizza. I recently saw a picture of 'pizza' make on a slice of zucchini. Looked good - but there was enough cheese melted on top to balance any calories saved from the skipped crust.

flnu - Yep, you're "awesome" for that much exercise during vacation. Were you in a one-person sea kayak?

6crowsgold - And Happy Easter / Passover to you. May you have good weather for your many events.

Readers -

From the Beck FB page today:
Think Thin Thursday Tip: If you were driving on the highway and missed your exit, would you say, “Forget it, I’ve really blown it now” and keep driving in the wrong direction? No! You’d get off at the very next exit and turn around. If you make a mistake, immediately turn yourself around and get right back on track.

Today's interesting event is shopping for clothes for a wedding next week. I thought I had clothes, but nothing really worked when I tried stuff on, so we'll see if I can do better at Nordstrom's. I've been working with the same personal shopper there since early in my weight loss journey so she's pretty experienced with dressing me at all sizes. The tricky part about a wedding is that a dress might be most appropriate, but my body shape works best with separates (size 10 on top, size 14 on bottom). We'll see.

I have a good plan with good foods for today so I won't be tempted to overeat over dressing room trauma.

WI: +0.1 kg, Exercise: +50 785/1500 minutes for April, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

BillBlueEyes: I love that you give paper to kids! That's such a great gift. When I encounter children at a stage where they enjoy drawing, I always try to get some paper into their hands because it seems there's never enough at a time when an abundance is what is called for. One of those "children" is finishing up his graphic design degree at college this semester.

Hugs for nationalparker and family!

Good morning, Coaches.

Traveling in San Francisco - past BBE's Redwoods. Taking the boys to Stinson Beach. Tracking with W W and it is going ok not great. We'll see. Best to all. Loved AZTricia's Quote.

Hello. Ate on plan today - continuing my streak since I've been at my folks. In fact, I had a good week before coming here as well. Ate a larger lunch and think that helped as my small dinner was sufficient and I'm not hungry going into night.

Days have been busy with appointments and scheduling stuff, quick marketing runs for this and that to see if Dad will be able to eat stuff, and tonight I ran out to see if I could find him some smaller sweatpants - his fall off him and I completely lucked out with two great pair very inexpensive. I hope they work out and are comfortable. I thought he'd get mad, and told Mom I could just return them, but I think he will try them. He doesn't want a "fuss" made. But he's so uncomfortable with everything.

I tried on a few pair of capris while out, and at least nothing was too tight, but was disappointed that I don't look like Jennifer Grey in Dirty Dancing. To me, that's what capris should look like. But that will never be the case, and I'd better get used to that. GardenerJoy, I hope you had more luck with your shopping. I have never used a personal shopper. Do you ever feel that they're urging you to purchase something you might not otherwise? How does that work?

Bill - Love the sharing of the legal pads. Clever and they'll remember your kindness down the line, too.

Safe travels to those who are on the road!

gastric bypass and Smokey the Bear
 

Coaches

You gotta wonder what Google assumes about you when the ad on top is natural gastric bypass $480 and then Smokey the Bear "get your smokey on!" Whatever that's supposed to mean.
So I finished up at the dentist. My teeth routine has tripled in length. Thankfully I love the water pick but was told I still have to floss.today I had that hygienist I didn't like before but in the two years since I've been there she's developed a personality. Credit Her. She was quite funny. She confirmed my top right molar at the back is loose but no predicting when/if it'll drop out or get infected so it has to come out.she said I could even just swallow it one day as I am eating and not even know it. I challenged that but she assured me it's happened, mostly with kids and baby teeth and frantic visits by parents wondering what to do (nothing. It passes or gets reabsorbed). And every once in a while a grown up does the same thing. Now I don't want to be one of them.

Foodwise I am getting nowhere fast. Cannot get regrouped and back into the steps. Will keep trying to work it out. MIL wants us over for Easter Sunday dinner. Well bring my mom and the visit will be shorter. She wants me to bring dessert. Another day to avoid food pushing and the temptation of stupid easter bunnies everywhere. Can't tell you the gauntlet I have run the last few days. It feels like there is more of that stuff out there this year than ever.

Will check in in the a.m. I send best wishes out to all who read this.

BBE: found out I was not chosen for the art event near Boston. Sad about this for sure but there's always next year and there's always another equally interesting thing to do.I would have enjoyed the opportunity of a face to face Beck hello though.Oh well, eh....

LEXXISS: I tweaked my back as I held lightweight ceramic pot with one hand and twisted around to get a decent photo of it with the other hand. I'm way better now and hope you are too.

NATIONAL PARKER: Kudos for time spent at your parents trying to figure out how to help them. My thoughts are with you. Please take good care.

GARDENERJOY: It was when you said your tractor had a plow attachment that I LOLed out loud (that's redundant isn't it? LOL). All I pictured was an impatient gardener pushing the snow out of the way so she/he could get started already. If your plow could actually get spring underway just by plowing you'd be richer than Croesus.

Quick check in today before I walk pup again and head to bed. I'm disappointed because this is my first off plan day since the beginning of the year. I will be on track tomorrow with the lesson that trying to rush weight loss is just not going to work. I need to NOT be hungry which means eating a reasonable amount of calories (for me) and not trying to exercise away extra pounds because it just makes me hungry. Lesson learned...back on track for tomorrow.

Good Friday
 

Coaches - I tried to get on top of some chores today but still have more to go. I also went and bought more food. I love the few religious holidays where normally the world stops - everything is closed. It is an opportunity to just stop - and do whatever without the pressure of errands and shopping etc. Not so any more - my local vegetable and fish market were open. Good thing since I had no fish but sad.

Had a rudimentary plan today that didn't include hot cross buns - which I bought at the market and ate (only 2 and threw out the other 4). Hopefully reading the Diet Fix this weekend, when I finish the chores, will put me back on track. I feel a bit lacklustre at the moment about it all

Tricia - great quote from Beck Facebook. Thanks for sharing it. Credit for lessons learned and plans made. I am getting the idea that the Diet Fix is pretty strong on not getting hungry - hence snacks and high protein. Will get to that part eventually...

Gardenerjoy - enjoy your shopping trip. I don't think separates are a problem but I find most dress code rules highly mysterious.

Nationalparker - know exactly what you mean about capris. Reminds me of Gidget but perhaps before your time :) Credit for taking so much effort to work out what works best for you dad - hope he likes his new pants

Onebyone - LOL at gastric bypass and Smokey the Bear - I am always interested by the ads that stalk me around the internet. Teeth do fall out - a few of mine did because of problems like you seem to have. But they have firmed up now with care. Some people are genetically predisposed to have "issues". Hope things get back on track for you with your plan.

Friday
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Gym session was Amped Arms and Abs, CREDIT moi. Wish the intersection of my schedule and the gym's allowed this three times a week. I sure could use it. But accept that it's progress. Walked to the library to return four items early to admit to myself that I wasn't going to read them; they will so kindly keep them on their shelves should I change my mind. It remains a challenge for me to not-read-a-book once I've touched it.

Got skewered for dinner. I'd planned to stop at some favorite local restaurant after an evening lecture that we'd attend after we visited the new exhibit at a favorite museum. We timed our visit to the hour before the nearby lecture - an efficient and clever use of our time. Neither bothered to notice that the museum wasn't open that hour. Drat. Ended up using the suddenly-available hour to get dinner together at a students' cafeteria. Portions were monstrous! We split one clam shell of food yet I had more than needed for a meal. I'm still struggling to leave restaurant food. I'll take CREDIT moi for the split and for the reasonable choice of a chicken dish despite being surrounded with fried everything else. And JOY moi for taking DW out to dinner for $5.95 total, LOL. I'm not cheap - the plastic utensils were of the better kind.


onebyone – Share your consternation over the "stupid easter bunnies everywhere." Is fruit salad an acceptable dessert to bring to Easter Sunday dinner? With biscotti or cookies for the others that you could skip? Yep, "keep trying" is the way forward. [Drat for the lost opportunity for a Boston meet-up.]

Joy (gardenerjoy) – I'm impressed. I'll register it as super self confidence to employ a personal shopper. Kudos for that and for recognizing that you can prepare yourself for the "dressing room trauma."

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – I, too, miss that life used to have moments that stopped. Ouch for hot cross buns with Kudos for tossing the remaining four. I lust for those every year and have to remind myself that my childhood joy eating them doesn't happen as an adult; there're just sweet rolls with sugar on top.

maryann - Wave to my Redwoods as you pass Muir Woods. In just a few more miles north you could wave to Point Reyes that so completely won my heart. Hope WW works well for you.

nationalparker – Doesn't matter - I'll adopt my mental image of you as "Jennifer Grey in Dirty Dancing" since it's useful to me to visualize who I'm writing to. Seems that most men, particularly military men, have this thing about "fuss" made. Kudos for taking the risk to make him more comfortable. And continued Kudos for keeping your eating plan in mind.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Thanks for the Beck quote about the missed highway exit. Super Kudos for lesson learned "that trying to rush weight loss is just not going to work." In other threads it's been pointed out that the Bikini push before summer begins is a great setup for failure.

Readers -

Hello to all,

Friday weigh-in joy: down five pounds. So bizarre. I know I did not eat less or exercise more while on vacation. Last Friday's gain must have just been to fake me out. Or maybe today's loss is. Now I'm all...hey...ate more, exercised less, lost five pounds. That's a strategy I can get behind. Followed by, oh no, I'm losing weight faster than recommended (I'm not when I look at the average loss per week), I *need* to eat a lot more. I have equally sabotaging thoughts when I gain weight. Feh. No exercise today.

Joy: Oooh. I've been planning on hitting up Nordstroms when I'm back in the States, and at a lower weight to boot. My current pants look like cartoon hobo pants tied with rope because I have to cinch 'em down with a belt to keep them on. (Yay!) Anyway, I've alwasy been curious about the Nordstrom personal shopping service. Are they on commission? When they work with you, do you feel pressure or guilt if you don't buy? Do they respect your comfort zone for price? Also, how much tailoring can you get for free...hems, sure, but can the tailor take-in a too big waist for example? I'm glad you've got a good plan with good foods; you will rock the wedding outfit.

Maryann: I love Stinson beach, so pretty and it makes me feel very small (in a good way). When I first got back from vacation, I mistook you for a new member. Then I read your posts and you still have the same voice. Lovely pic, by the way.

Nationalparker: I'm impressed that you are still posting, let alone OP, along with everything else going on. Kudos for both.

Onebyone: Credit for the attitude of "I'll keep working on it."

Tricia: Whoa! THAT is a huge success! 100+ days OP!

Cheryl: Credit for throwing out two. Missed your exit, but got right back to it. I've never seen a hot crossed bun. Delicious? I'll go google next.

BBE: It was a kayak built for two and so totally untippable that I put my three year old in the front seat by herself. High class plastic--hey, big spender.

G'night, all. Sweet dreams.

Others
 

Coaches

So I'm making breakfast for us. DH has a holiday today. The traffic nearby is very very light. Makes me want to take the car and go for a long drive. What I will do instead is take the car and drive to my studio and begin work carving a large woodblock. Being newly rejected for a large woodblock idea made me wonder if I should *really* be doing this idea and then I thought naaaaah. juries, events, organizers, they all have their agendas... just keep moving forward. What is the key here is *I* have an idea that motivates*me* what becomes of it/where it goes is besides the point. My *joy* is in the making it. The rest is all fluff. When it rises above that I get confused and pessimistic and this helps me not.

Today I am tracking my food which I haven't done in a while. Its cause I started tracking differently with the Diet Fix and then I stopped. I am going back to my fitbit tracking which correlates to the fitbit data I get from the fitbit band on my wrist. THIS is what I need to work into THAT diet fix plan, not the other way around BECAUSE THE FITBIT WAS WORKING FOR ME and as soon as I put that aside I got lost again and ate off plan again and got confused again. I'm a simple human and I need a simple plan. Will still go forward with Day 5 Diet Fix today. Will adapt what works today but keep fitbit data, which is bodily reality, in mind.

I'll check in later with you guys. Bye for now.

Super quick post here to say the joys of a sibling you get along wonderfully with - miscommunication with my brother on who was picking up my father after a treatment today. He took him, and I took mom to dialysis and then went basically next door to the cancer facility ... and checked in to wait an hour+ for Dad. Called my brother to check on the oxygen level of his portable canister because I brain cramped and didn't and then he asked why I was there - to get him. But I'm doing that. Oh, okay - I thought i was since it was so close. End of story. No regurgitation of every spoken word about who/when on the pickups, no guilt of bad memory, no implied lack of accountability. It's just that there are daily appointments and we got signals crossed. He mixes me up with his wife as far as conversations now and then, and I have not had the greatest memory myself. So seconds later, we're all good. With my sister, it would still be an issue, referred to repeatedly and would be relayed to many others. I am so thankful for my relationship with my brother and our agreement on everything that comes up with our parents' care.

I did have my planned snack this morning instead of this evening - my treat was a 120 calorie coconut chocolate treat. I'm not beating myself up - I left the cancer facility and cried when I got to the car for how tiny and frail he looks, and then sucked it up and realized he might not be strong in body, but he's strong in spirit and fortitude. But then the treat was a comfort food, entirely. I am okay with it as it was limited and savored. (am i making excuses?) oh well ...

Another problem solved (in theory) as there was an issue with meds taken or not this morning. So I thought, we'll use military time. Then no issue if he notes on the chart that it was 5:15 - we'll know that's a.m. and 17:15 will be p.m. He's used to that and I'll be the one counting on my fingers, despite hearing it my whole life! :) Silly how such easy solutions don't come at first now and then. And I'm sure many of you are going, "well, no kidding that is what you're SUPPOSED to do..." ha ha - eh, it's a learning curve for me.

I wrote about the Strange Names, Great Taste class on my blog today -- you can see photos of Toad in the Hole, Bubble and Squeak, and Spotted Dick here: http://www.joyweesemoll.com/2014/04/...-isles-friday/

The wedding outfit will be black palazzo pants that I already owned with a green cardigan and tee that works wonderfully with one of the silk scarves I brought back from Paris. It's all very springy and dressy and fluid and I feel good wearing it. Credit for bringing the pants and scarves with me to the store so I could find things that worked with what I already owned and felt good about.

I finally read Day 10 of The Diet Fix. Basically, go forth and sin no more. My worry is that all this measuring, weighing, and calculating is another point where things could break down. If I get fed up with it, will that drag me off plan completely? He didn't address that general sort of resistance in this chapter, but he did address "too busy" and some of that applies to my worry.

I have to admit that, in practice, the few times I've been unwilling to weigh and measure has been related to judging what I'm eating. And, that I've been able to get right on track with the next meal by weighing and measuring when I'm in a less resistant and judgmental place -- which has been an aid to keeping on track most of the time.

There's more to the book, so we'll see what else he has to say after the 10 Day Reset.

WI: NC in kg, Exercise: +30 815/1500 minutes for April, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

nationalparker and flnu: the nice part about making an appointment with a personal shopper is that there are garments waiting in the dressing room when I arrive, and they just keep coming as we work out that I might want a different size in this top or a different color for that one or maybe another brand of slacks would fit better. The personal shopper does all the running about the store and she's much more efficient than I could ever be.
There's absolutely no pressure to buy anything I don't want. She's even good about saying, "that color just doesn't work on you, does it?" One of the reasons I work with her is that I trust her taste and eye more than my own.
On the other hand, I often end up buying more than I originally intended. Like yesterday, I bought an outfit for the wedding, but there was a jacket that looked great on me so I got it, too. It will be perfect for slightly less dressy events and business meetings. It's difficult not to buy everything that looks good just because that's still a new experience for me. But it's not hard at all to turn down the many things that don't look good. I seem to need to try on a lot of clothes to get a good fit, so I reject way more things than I keep.
Alterations are one of the reasons I shop at Nordstrom's. Hems are free. Taking in the waist (which I almost always need on slacks) isn't free, but most slacks don't work at all on me without that and it's cheaper and more convenient to use Nordstrom's tailors than find one on my own. We recently got a Nordstrom's card and we get a certain number of free alterations with that.
The personal shopper is on commission, I'm sure, but I think she looks at her clients as long-term customers. She'd rather I come back again and again than sell me something I don't like and have me go elsewhere next time.

onebyone: LOL at your unique image of precisely how a snow plow on a garden tractor aids in garden work.

AZtricia: not allowing oneself to get hungry is the major tenet of The Diet Fix.

Hmmm. That wouldn't work for me. I really enjoy eating when I am hungry. I enjoy eating when I'm not hungry too, of course, but the lack of hunger is a burr.

Hello!

AZtricia, that quote about missing the exit was pure genius!

OP for Thursday. Fasting today; a busy day at Church and an easy fasting day. Hanging on for tomorrow's weigh in.

Have begun moving toward a "Unified Field Plan" for exercise instead of hit and miss. Planning seems to work for food so it should work for exercise too, right?

Best to all!

Hello Coaches,
Quick check in. Doing better today. Wishing you all a wonderful weekend. I may not be able to check in as we've lots on the schedule.

Good Saturday
 

Coaches

I had a plan for food today and that made life easy - but there were no real challenges today. I was busy doing chores the whole day and have now prepped dinner ready to cook a casserole for a few meals. I didn't do any exercise beyond heavy cleaning - will finish chores tomorrow and go to the gym for a rest. I have had no time this semester to stay up with garden and house chores so it is good to catch up - even the dogs gots a bath (not that they were too impressed with that). Will repot a few things tomorrow and get a few new seedlings to fill the gaps

CeeJay - hope your 2 nights in the hotel went OK and that you are enjoying Easter. I am glad you introduced us to the Diet Fix - I like how he holds retail food providers accountable for their ingredients and calories, all despite their claims of being healthy. And the book is good too :) - will get to the Fix tomorrow and hopefully start in the next few days

BillBE - Your evening out makes enjoyable reading - and the message that learning to not overeat is important and to be prepared for changes in plans

flnu - Yay for 5 pounds down - amazing. LOL about a strategy you can get behind that has less exercise and more food - I'd quite like that - and identify with the sabotaging thoughts. Hot crossed buns - not so delicious but comfort food with history

Onebyone - Credit for making choices about what motivates and interests you, and about how to best track your food and calories. I use the fitbit AND My Fitness Pal - and they work well together. Not sure yet what the Fix will ask of me. Hope you made it to Day 5

Nationalparker - you are doing well to move on from your treat. You have been on plan during some pretty difficult time so glad you enjoyed your treat and moved on. Happy that you and your brother are in synch.

Gardenerjoy - liked the cooking blog post. These are familiar foods here - Bubble and Squeak takes many favourite forms (not all with mashed potato - sometimes with roast veggies). Terrific wedding outfit by the sound of it. I now want my own personal shopper but think only the REALLY high end shops have them here. Out of my grasp. Thanks for getting to Day 10 - I know what I am in for

6crowsgold - I forgot to fast on Friday! Not sure I can fit it in this weekend now - drat.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Glad things are better - have a wonderful weekend

Saturday
 

Diet Coaches/Buddies – Becoming annoyed with this cold weather after such a splendid week of believing that Spring was here. Walked, CREDIT moi, bundled up. Perhaps I should feel gratitude that walking was possible since it wasn't a blizzard. Dancing was the evening's exercise.

Eating ran into a problem in the afternoon. Unexpectedly, I spent a couple of hours in a club situation with open dishes of nuts and other snacks. I seriously overdid my allocated afternoon snack. It wasn't even good stuff - it was unexpected stuff. I was so caught off-guard that I didn't even have the wisp of a plan. Will try to work that one better. Dinner, on the other hand, was a joy. We had the other half of the grilled salmon steaks. DW popped outside to our new gas Weber to grill the asparagus. What a treat - grilled veggies are just the best. CREDIT moi for eating well when I'm in my grove.


onebyone – Makes sense to track the way that works for you. Kudos for recognizing that your artistic merit doesn't flow from this week's jury.

Joy (gardenerjoy) – Thanks for the link to your blog describing the British foods. My take is that I'm seriously pleased that you weren't able to find the equivalent of British breakfast sausage. When we did B&B's in England for a week we started asking the hostess to skip the sausages; they aren't to my liking. Bratwurst, on the other hand, is killer good. I'll ponder that thought that resistance to measuring is resistance to judging.

Cheryl (GosfordGirl) – Yay for "a casserole for a few meals." DW suggests that we need a new word to replace 'left overs' for food that was cooked to serve several meals. 'Left overs' should apply to food unintentionally not eaten at a prior meal. Kudos for cleaning hard enough that going to the gym was a rest.

nationalparker – Terrific reminder from your story of the mix-up with your brother about how we work with sane folks both grounded in reality. Kudos to you both for staying focused on what's important. Choosing a comfort food for your day's planned snack doesn't need justification. Kudos for recognizing what you needed and what would work. You could have dug into a stack of cookies and had to double down since when they didn't do what you needed.

Tricia (AZtricia) - Have a happy busy schedule.

flnu - Savor it - five pounds lost on a vacation that neither ate less nor moved more. Savor it; patent it; publish it. You'll make enough in the first week for both daughters' full college expenses, LOL. Kudos for being mindful enough for that to happen however it did. LOL at the hobo image. And LMAO at "I enjoy eating when I'm not hungry too."

6crowsgold - Good luck designing your "Unified Field Plan" for exercise - whatever umbrella encourages the exercise is the way to go.

Readers -

I finished The Diet Fix last night except for the recipes (which I glanced at before and was unimpressed). One chapter fulfills the promise of the subtitle to "get the best out of any diet," although I laughed a bit that he bent them all in his direction. So, his version of Paleo allows a grain here and there and his version of low-fat, isn't any more. Really, his plan reminds me most of the one in The Complete Beck Diet for Life -- it's not low-carb enough to be low-carb and not low-fat enough to be low-fat. Philosophically, I like this middle of the road approach, even if I'm finding it somewhat difficult to get there from my low-fat mindset. I think I would find the Beck plan much easier now and I may try that next. I remember that I liked the way it combined exchange-plan style dieting (my preferred form) with calorie counting.

He had some great tips in the travel section. Did you know this?

He also said that hotels that don't have mini-bars often have mini-fridges that they can bring to the room. They have them because some travelers need them for their medications. And some hotels even have mini-microwaves available for request. I never thought to request those things in rooms that don't have them.

The material in the back motivated me to repeat the 10 days again and do it better this time. I was so flummoxed by the protein requirement and the calorie-counting that I never really managed to embrace the other thought and behavior habits that I think will be most helpful.

I tend to compare every book to Beck and this one stacks up pretty well. It's missing the emphasis on a Diet Buddy or Coach which, obviously, I consider vital to my success. Most doctors don't seem to recognize how much their mere presence helps their clients in structure and support and so they forget to write that into their books. Kudos to Beck for being able to step back and see that.

I'm still puzzling over some of the concepts.

I'm worried that the positive emphasis on enjoying life could trigger an unhelpful part of myself that says "hey! I enjoy eating junk food in the car!" His requirement to keep a food diary would counter that, but I fear that I might ditch that while taking "permission" to enjoy myself. Still, it hasn't happened yet.

I wonder if I would have found his notion that I can eat anything as useful to me as going cold-turkey on junk foods was. It's too late to test that now, because I'm sure not going to reintroduce the foods that caused me problems just to see.

I'm still mostly convinced that "hunger is not an emergency" is a more helpful guideline to me than "eat when you're hungry." But I have rarely been hungry when I meet the timing and protein requirements of his plan, so it's mostly a moot point.

WI: +0.5 kg, Exercise: +90 905/1500 minutes for April, Food: 80%op, Read my Advantages and Responses: yes

GosfordGirl: Your day of chores sounds plenty challenging to me. Credit to you for making and sticking to a food plan while doing them.

Doing Diet Fix Day 5 today
 

Coaches

I get lost in the all or nothingness of everything and in a tendency to both procrastinate and to embrace perfectionism. These two are the flip sides of the same coin. So after having two kinda horrendous food days, triggered by struggles with the Diet Fix format (timing of food/lots more tracking/no upper limits) and when I struggle or get confused I don't stop eating, I eat, more, over the emotion of feeling confused. And as usually happens my body reaches some point where nothing seems to fit, again, and I think wow what am I doing and I though look, just use the parts that work, do what WAS working that I threw out cause it wasn't the same as this week's food expert suggests. I think, given the state of me, in which I am an expert, my recovery from excess food is shaky at best and it has not taken hold except for limited amount of time. I think whatever I have discovered that works for me I should keep on doing no matter what/who suggests some other path. This is all keeping with the theme of Diet Fix day 5: Think. I am thinking. Thinking about what worked for me and what I dropped. What worked was tracking=same as diet fix.
what worked was knowing there are foods that are terrible eating triggers for me and it is best for me to avoid. Diet Fix says I shouldn't avoid them but try to work them in. I don;t think I can do that and not trigger a binge. DF would say that's cause I am restricting. I think that's cause I am respecting that those foods over the course of my while life, not just now, have proven themselves to be gateways to unrestricted eating and I am simply more sane without them *for now*. There have been times when I am going along great and foods that would be triggers now are manageable then (but how much are they really cause that's how I get back to where I am right now). Anyway, basically I need a flexible program and saying "I can't ever have this" to "I must have this" or "can't say I won't have this", it's not good for my mental balance. If all food is open to me and I start to choose sweets or junky-ish stuff, I don't choose veggies and I eat less fruit. I just do that incrementally until I am off plan and binge eating.

Geez, just looked at the time. I have to go. Will continue later.