Sorry, I need to vent. So I get this email from my ex's girlfriend. First of all, my ex and I broke up May of 07 so it's been awhile.
Her and I have talked before she texted me from his phone last November pretending to be him and then called her out b/c I knew it wasn't him. We were civil to each other no big deal.
Well, fast forward to now. She sent this email telling me why did I see him last Halloween and she got this message from Myspace saying that I did. I was like Myspace drama? Are you freaking kidding me? How old are you? She said that she's pregnant again and that they're getting married. I was like congrats and I have no idea what you're talking about. Well today she sent me another email saying she doesn't understand why all these hoes are trying to get her man.
I was like.... ok little girl, you done crossed the line, I was trying to be civil. I didn't go off but asked her how dense is she really? I moved to CA in March and for Halloween last year I was in LA. I know it's not a big deal, but why is she bothering me about her man? Who I know cheated on me with her! But no, I didn't bring that up.... Any suggestions? Should I just leave it be or what? It just makes me mad when lil hoochies bothering me.
I think people like this from my experience are just insecure and need something to make themselves feel superior like 'I'm the one in control now, not you'
Apparently she is VERY insecure -- with good reason -- he cheated on you with her -- she should be nervous -- she knows what he is capable of . I feel she brought it on herself -- some people will always cheat -- I just never felt the need to be the "other 1/2" of the problem myself.
I would send her a quick note that you have a life and don't have time to deal with her drama -- it's not like she's a friend of yours. Let her know she is wasting your time and her's and that she should probably use this energy elsewhere, you don't care.
I agree with shelby, don't give her a full blown e-mail back. A simple sentance or two telling her that you'd rather not be bothered and to quite wasting your time. then leave it be -if she e-mails you back with more *****ing, just drop it. It's not worth your time! She obviously has issues, and is quite immature, needing to cause drama to keep herself busy or feeling good about herself.
This is what I replied.... I know! I shouldn't have sunk to her level... but I was mad. It's either going to make her mad and she'll respond or she'll leave me alone. I wish I was the bigger person, but nope had to say something.
I know who the **** you are. Girl please.... aint nobody trying to get your man. Are you really that dense? I never saw him in October. I was in LA on Halloween so you didn't receive **** from me. I thought that we could be decent to each other but I was wrong. You don't know me so don't you call me a hoe. I live in CA. I'm not ever coming back to KC so you have nothing to concern your little small brain with.
I swear hoes are getting dumber by the day. So sad.
I usually don't get bothered by stuff like this, but today it bothers me. Probably because I'm single and have been for 5 1/2 months and all the guys I'm meeting are losers.
Personally, I would just leave it unless it gets to a point where it really warrants attention. It seems like more attention might put fuel to the fire, and since she is feeling defensive and angry, she might respond in a defensive and angry way to whatever you say because she is looking to relieve her fear. She's obviously insecure about her relationship and maybe feels threatened by you and other women for some reason. Or maybe she's worried that he is cheating on her and - because you experienced the same thing - then wants reassurance or support or something from you like for you to tell her he is not because when he was, this is what happened with you - or because it's comforting to speak to someone who can relate. That probably sounds off-the-wall though, since she has been so rude to you.
Whatever the reason, it seems to me like she is worried and insecure and is seeking comfort/relief in some way, and also isn't dealing with her feelings in a constructive and positive way. Especially if she is actually pregnant or has a child with your ex, that can put a new spin on her insecurity and worry to stay with him.
I don't know how helpful that is really. I think sometimes the best way to deal with unnecessary drama is to refuse to play along. And if you need to deal with her, then do it in a mature, dignified way
When you reply to her, you're giving her the satisfaction of letting her know she's gotten to you. When you start justifying or explaining where you were when or why it was impossible for you to have seen him or anything like that, you're just buying into her game.
And by insulting her, you've just descended to her level and justified her pissy little comments.
The best response (IMO) would be to respond very simply: I'm sorry I don't know what you're talking about, but I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't contact me again. I'm no longer involved with [ex's name] or you and I don't care to be in the future.
After that, block the number, remove her from your MySpace friend's list, and don't respond to any emails or contact in the future.
Beautiful- I wish I would have read your post before I responded. I'll try dignified next time.
I felt like it was a lot of 'babble', but I hope it was helpful in some way.
I totally understand. Some things are easier said than done sometimes . It is hard to deal with stuff like that - there's that saying about counting backwards from 10 so that you can take a couple of seconds to chill out.. personally I find it's more like a hundred sometimes!
Beautiful: amen sister! I should have. I won't reply if she emails me back and try to block her. She's already blocked on myspace (which I don't even use it! I've been trying to delete it, Facebook is much better. )
Photo: You are so right and that was what my brain was saying, but my emotions got the better of me. My first reaction was to send the email and then send him an email and talk to his sister. I'm glad I didn't do that.
Shelby, Love, Gar, Spoz: Y'all are right.... I know she's insecure b/c she didn't know that he was seeing me when they were first together. When she talked to me last year she thought that he was cheating on her. She also lost their baby and now she's pregnant again. I should just have grace for her and not be mad just feel sorry for her from a distance and be thankful I'm not in that situation.
I need to count my blessings for real. And that makes me feel better. I know that I'm better than that to stay with a cheatin man. Yay me!
Ghost: You are so funny.... that thought did cross my mind, but I dont even have his phone number. lol I'm sure she would have loved that! Oh to see the reaction......
She emailed me back and said that she didn't call me a hoe. Then she said don't be mad that she took my man.
You'll be proud of me........ I replied: Please don't ever contact me again.
I blocked her email and stopped myself from emailing my ex to tell him to keep his broad in line, and decided that I'm through. I don't need the drama. I'm drama free. I just wonder why it bothers me so bad. I hate how I'm feeling right now. It's like I know all the "truth" but some how that's not making me feel better.
Awwww! Why are some females so petty?!?!
. I feel she brought it on herself -- some people will always cheat -- I just never felt the need to be the "other 1/2" of the problem myself. 
I sunk to her level....
It's either going to make her mad and she'll respond or she'll leave me alone. I wish I was the bigger person, but nope had to say something. 
I felt like it was a lot of 'babble', but I hope it was helpful in some way. 
. It is hard to deal with stuff like that - there's that saying about counting backwards from 10 so that you can take a couple of seconds to chill out.. personally I find it's more like a hundred sometimes! 
