Now...I need some advice, im prolly gonna post this in some other threads as I just want some advice from any person on any diet/with a weight problem/with just general life experience.
Basically, as you can see from my stats im trying to lose weight, and I dont have that much to go! Im really getting frustrated and am so so keen to kick this right now and get into the best shape of my life, so I can stay this way for ever!
Next week I will be going back to University and I will be living with my Aunty, she is single and quite overweight... im worried if she knows Im trying to lose weight that she will try and feed me up? I dont eat much and try not to eat too many carbs at night. Should I be straight up and tell her that theres no offence intended but I just need to make my own choices?
I just feel so petty when she has so much to lose and isn't trying to as far as i know, and my weight its a normal healthy weight! I just want to look better!
Your aunt may be jealous of your weight loss thus far, and she may try to sabatoge you. It depends on her and her relationship with you. I would tell her immediately that you are not going to be eating unhealthy at all, and it's no offense to her if you refuse something she offers. She should get the message after you refuse the first few times. But DO refuse, if you accept once, you have just opened the flood gates of her offering all the time because if she thinks there's any chance of you wanting something, she'll always offer.
You may be surprised at how understanding people can be!
When I told my BF's friends that I was on WW (a couple of years ago), they made specific accommodations for me during cookouts and get-togethers... My favorite example-- I decided to try being vegetarian for a while at this point: And they bought Garden Burgers (1pt), Healthy Buns (2pts), Supplied tons of mustard (0pts), and a bowl of carrots (which had a sticky note attached: "For Kat: 0pts")! I was so touched that they remembered--they kept me OP, and they have NEVER tried to sabotage me
I think the most important thing, especially if you're going to be living with your Aunt, is being purely honest. Be upfront (in a non-confrontational way) and just say "I'm doing this for me, and I would love your support!" Then just hope for the best--and if she's not supportive (in an obvious sabotage-y kind of way), then it's time to make a big deal about your goals, or (as a last resort) reevaluate your living situation..
I have to often tell my boyfriend after dinner: I'm seriously done, full, and out of points/calories for the day, so if you eat anything else, please don't offer it!" And he respects it
Good Luck!
Last edited by weegreenlassie; 02-28-2008 at 03:40 AM.
Reason: needed to add another thought...
I think that you don't even necessarily have to go at her from a weight loss perspective. You can just let her know that you are treating your body to certain foods and staying away from certain ones in order to be healthy. Let her know that you feel much better eating fresh fruits for breakfast instead of a ton of sausages and pastries.
I agree that you might want to make it about healthier eating instead of weight specifically. And! Definitely just let her know in a matter-of-fact way ahead of time. That way she doesn't expect you to eat certain things, or have certain things on hand that you're not going to want around.
I'm not sure if you're asking because you know your aunt well enough to know that she will most likely try to sabotage, or if you're just unsure because she's not dieting? Eitherway, the best thing to do is just let her know. If stuff comes up, just refuse the usual way you'd refuse a normal offer to eat something. "Naw thanks."
I'm sure your Aunt will be supportive. Maybe offer to help her with the grocery shopping and do the cooking a few days a week. You might end up being a good influence on her!
It's also very important that you respect her feelings. I swear you could be talking about my aunt right now though! My sister is even more overweight and whenever she has a boyfriend or is losing weight, my auntie is very different around her. Buuut, how would you feel if you were her? Either she will be happy for you or she will be jealous/insecure. If she is insecure, please don't play into it. just don't rub it in her face. Eat healthily but don't be obnoxious about it (you know what i mean?) If she asks you, tell her. but don't rub it in her face. if there's a situation where you don't want to eat something, politely decline or offer to make dinner. but don't get worked up about it now. Wait and see how she reacts and just go into the situation with an upbeat attitude.
Is your aunt overweight but okay with her size? Because then she might not take offense to you trying to lose weight anyway. Or is your aunt someone who wants to lose weight and just never can? Would she be more jealous/sabotagy instead of supportive, or at least non-judgemental?
I don't really like telling people about my weight loss in general. But I have learned to tell my roommate when I don't really want certain foods around. There are some foods I can't have around all the time, or else I'm eating them all the time. Fortunately they're foods she's okay with not having around, except every once in a while.
It's hard sometimes to gauge what you can/can't tell someone you're living with. Maybe give it some time and see what feels right to tell her.
Hey guys Thanks for all your advice. I haven't been on here recvently, had the worst bug ever! Can't keep any food down at all....not pretty! On the plus side I did throw up cheesy nachos and wedges and don't think ill ever be able to eat them again.
I think I should be straight up, tell her I try to eat healthy, things like I don't eat Pasta unless its chocka block full of veges and I don't eat red meats.
I should clarify. She may be 50 but she is absolutely gorgeous...(blonde hair, high cheek bones, big blue eyes....supposedly i look like her and i find that such a compliment )
We do get on well, but I've noticed her watchin what I eat in the past, and commenting on my selections...she can be very stubborn and says what she thinks, but i guess she'll understand. Was thinking maybe if living with me makes her lose a bit she might get really into it!
She likes good healthy delicious foods, but she also likes her bad foods... but I guess with me n the house there wont be reasons to resort fo convenient foods like Nachos and Heat and Eat Pizza.... I guess its simple, if she suggests takeaways I should keep some marinated chicken breast in the freezer, so I can suggest those with Salad instead. Freeze Portions of Soup, keep salad in the fridge to have with every meal.
I like the idea of offering to cook. Im not home til 6.30 week nights except monday, so I can do that night. And maybe weekends we could cook together when we arent busy!
Thank you! Everyone seems to pretty much say be honest, but say healthy! I figure once she sees how much I work out and what foods I snack on she might understand how important it is to me!
I wouldn't expect her to jump on the bandwagon, learn your eating plan and cook for it. So the suggestion of offering to cook is good - and you can make extras for planned overs for days when you don't choose to eat what she may have prepared. Or you could offer to plan meals together if you think that would work. Or come up with a schedule - you cook certain days, or certain nights are planned to be on your own, when she can do take out and you can eat your prepared chicken dish, etc. You can always offer to add a BIG salad to any meal that has little else you'd choose to eat.
You can't let the fact that also needs to lose weight affect you. Some people are perfectly comfortable with their bodies the way they are (more power to them) and others just have different reasons for not being able to successfully drop the pounds. I agree with everyone. Just be up front about it and when it comes to cooking and even shopping or whatever, fend for yourself like you would with any other roommate. My roommates and I don't eat the same things even if we do eat together...just don't let her discourage you or derail your efforts.
Needing some advice with living situations!
) 
So the suggestion of offering to cook is good - and you can make extras for planned overs for days when you don't choose to eat what she may have prepared. Or you could offer to plan meals together if you think that would work. Or come up with a schedule - you cook certain days, or certain nights are planned to be on your own, when she can do take out and you can eat your prepared chicken dish, etc. You can always offer to add a BIG salad to any meal that has little else you'd choose to eat. 
