Hi everyone! Finally the weekend is here! I am glad for the break from the hustle & bustle all week, but I really dread them, they are bad diet days for me! Course tomorrow I pormised the kids that we would finally go to the pool for the first time this year. All those skinny little bikini clad teens should keep me "honest". (I just look at them & think "Enjoy it now honey! Child Bearing & the "mid 20 gain" will be here before you know it")
I am one pound shy of the 30 pound loss mark! I would love to hit it this weekend, but I never lose on the weekends! Maybe I will ride that dam*...opps , mean great bike, a little longer & a little faster tonight to try to push me over the edge! Zach was just sent to his room for something with Dad, so I guess that I will be riding solo anyway, might as well work at harder than normal anyway! Alli & I start Mom/Daughter DanceFit classes in 2 weeks, thank God, I will then have one night where I can skip the bike & not feel guilty!

Soozie, I think that I read your daughter is 5, has she started school yet? Alli missed the cut off last year, but is 6 now & starts kindergarten in the fall. How did I ever get to be old enough to have 2 kids in school! (I guess that it happened in my sleep while those nasty little elves :s: were spackeling the fat onto my butt & thighs!) Your dinner sounds yummy! Makes my bowl of Special K look as pathetic as it really is!

Well I will see everyone back here soon! If I don't get out for that bike ride soon, I will skip it! Have a good weekend!

Hello ladies ;)

How are all of you? I got back from my conference yesterday, but I went out with a friend for dessert and discussion. I didn't end up coming home until almost 2am! It was fun, though! I just found out that I will have funding to attend two more conferences this year, which I am so happy about :smug: As a poor grad student, I can't really afford those things, so it's nice that the university is helping me out.

Anyways--on to the more important stuff, which is all of you!

Big Warm Welcome to Soozie and Christina :D
Soozie: I laughed when I read what you said about the big ol' cotton drawers! As a matter of fact, I had been thinking the exact same thing the other day. Sometimes I just look at myself and wonder how I let my weight get so out of control. I think your gym sounds great. I just joined an all-girls gym, and it's nice. I feel more in-place!

Christina: Huge CONGRATS on your successful weight loss. (I hate saying loss because it's not like you woke up and you lost the weight. You worked your butt off, so congrats on your weight work!) When will you see your mother-in-law again? Whatever works! You wouldn't want to know about some of the things I think about when I'm working out! Your children sound adorable! I know what you mean about wondering how they got big so fast--my god daughter is 6! I feel like she was just born.

Ruth: When is your family reunion? It sounds like both you and Sqeak have big families. Mine is small, but my boyfriend's is huge, and I love that about his family. I will be celebrating Father's Day on Sunday, and I can't wait. I saw my dad today, and he's excited, too. How did the doctor go?

Ellis: That is wonderful that your husband is understanding. How are things with your daughter? Please, please don't worry about snapping at her. That's a part of life. Every parent in the world has those moments, and it's completely normal. The important part is that you reacted by apologizing and talking it over with her. BTW, I love your story about Ruth, the 15 year old boy!

Den: Where are you taking off to for a few days? I love going up north, so I will be mighty jealous if that's where you're headed! I normally spend the summers camping through the UP with my boyfriend. However, I had to work as many hours as I could this summer, and I really miss those lazy days we usually share. We're going away next weekend, though, and it is much needed!
I'm sorry to hear about your friend's dad. She's lucky to have a friend as caring and considerate as you when she really needs someone.

Mauvauis: How's the preliminary job search going? I think Den's right. Sometimes, we have to take a leap of faith. It's not easy, but those are the moments in life that you really discover what you have been missing out on. You have so many wonderful skills that any employer would be blessed to hire you. You're an asset, so find someone that makes you feel that way.

Squeak: Lake Placid is coming up fast! It's funny that we've been talking about friends getting married and having kids. Just yesterday, one of my friends asked me to stand up in a wedding in May (the weekend after I stand up for another friend), and yet another friend had a baby! When does it end! I know what you mean about eating everything in sight. Sometimes I feel like a vacuum cleaner, and that's the habit that I've recently developed and is impossible to break.

Okay, that's all for me! Oh yeah, none of you are lying--you are all gorgeous! Keep smiling!

Tigger :wave:

hi ladies
 

Christina, my little girl is five. She will start kindergarden in the fall. I can't believe how big she is getting. She's still my baby but she looks like a kid now. She's at that age where she says amazing things all the time. She takes in everything. Today I was telling my partner about this web site (3fc). I rarely talk about weight in front of our daughter, don't want to make her crazy if I can help it!!! well she said to me, mom stand up a minute, I stood up and said, yes?, she said, yeah mom you do look like you lost some weight. Too, funny, my cutie. Well ladies. Onto the weekend, sorry I blabbed so much today, guess I'm just excited about finding the support. take care. Soozie

OMG, if Moses is not a hunk, who is? Whom is? Of course I got dumped on for thinking Prince Phil looked pretty good at the Queen Mum's funeral.

SO chickies - come up with a droolable hunk for me. Sean Connery? Paul Newman is losing his mind. Howard Keel is dead. Peter LAwford? Rock Hudson - not my type. Ummm - can't think of any other except Farmer Art and his ilk. What the heck is an ilk? I want one!

Am a bit delirious because I announced to the Fair Board that I will finish my term and no run for Treasurer next term. I am taking my LIFE back!

Am off to watch a Dog Show in Kingston tomorrow so try not to miss me too much.

Hey, it's raining! ANd my dogs are out! Ireally wanted a muddy floor before bedtime.

Night all.

Hello Everyone!

Good grief! I don't post for one night and I miss all the action, I will never be able to catch up with everything!

Firstly a big hello :wave: and welcome :D to Soozie and Christina!

Secondly, I guess my definition of an Alternachick is someone who has various interests, hobbies etc., maybe they are a little different from those around them, maybe a bit artsy, creative, I guess I was describing how I feel about myself when I picked the name (see first Alternachick post where Ellis and I introduce ourselves, banter, and then Ruthxxx butts in and points out that we live in the same city:lol: )

Soozie- your daughter has a beautiful name and sounds like a total cutie! :lol: about the drawers. They are one of my motivational tools as in " I so do not want to be wearing these so I better do something about it"!

Christina-congrats on your weight loss! I must be on the same fat fairy or elves route as you are...they have spackled my butt and thighs too! Darn things just sneak up on you when you are not looking!

Ellis-I liked the first Planet of the Apes best, although I did enjoy the new one. As for Charlton Heston... I used to like him but I don't care for the man's personal opinions and politics these days.

Ruthxxx-How did the board take it when you announced your bid for freedom? I hate to tell you but both Peter Lawford and Rock Hudson are dead, are you still looking for dates in the cemetary? :lol: I am voting for Sean Connery...why if I was 30 years older, whoa baby! ;)

Tiggerdiva-glad you had a good time at your conference, nothing like catching up with old friends...As for my work, well I am staying where I am for now but working towards some goals that I have set for myself so things should get better. DH gave me a big supportive pep talk that ended in tears and hugs and kisses, he is so good to me:love:

Squeeker-how many days to your holiday? ;) I know you are counting down, I am doing the same but I am not leaving until August.

Dentrassi-where are you headed on your holidays?

Shel-haven't heard from you lately-hope everything is good with you.

I was flipping through some girlie how to book the other day at the book store...one of the lines was "every woman should treat her self like a princess" well, how sweet...I say screw that! Every woman should be treating herself like a Queen! :D

Goodnight everyone and have a great weekend!

Soozie, sorry just rereading & realized I had a typo in mine, Allis is only 5, she will be six in Sept. I never really thought about talking about dieting in front of her, until in May she was at ballet class & there is a little girl there that is heavy. We were getting in the car & Alli said "Mommy, Rachel's Mom always has snacks for her to eat after dance. She should give her fruit & healthy stuff instead of cookies or chips. That is why she is fat" I felt awful that first of all my poor eating habits and dieting have made something as simple as that noticeable to my child. I also was very worried that she would say something to hurt Rachel's feelings. So now I try to just say that Mommy is eating healthier. I do worry that she inherited my genes & will have to worry about her weight when she gets older, but I don't want her to have an eating disorder instead.

I am thinking of sending my huge drawers to some third world country, they could provide shelter for a family of 5!:lol:

Ruthxx, I am not sure that a dead date wouldn't be a good idea. Hey he would never complain about the house being a mess! Is your dog show in Kingston, ONT? We have a summer cottage up there. It is so nice & peaceful, well as peaceful as it can be with 2 kids! My son, who is 7, tells us that he wants to marry a Canadian, so he can fish all day at the lake. He thinks that since we go up there & just fish & swim, that none of the Canadians work!

Oh well, since it is saturday & for some reason I am wide awake at 5am, I guess that I might as well start the chores, so they canbe done & I can enjoy the day off!

Hey, Christina - I like your son's impression of the Canadian lifestyle. Actually for some folks around here that is the way it is. Where exactly IS your cottage? And when will you be there? I am very close to Kingston and may be passing you on my way in and out!

Well, not going to any damned dog show today. It's going to be a thunderstorm day and I don't intend to stand in an open field in the rain and watch miserable-looking pooches. I guess Lucy's brother will have to be shown without his Grand*****'s support.

Wish I had time to respond to everyon'e post - I DO read them but life keeps interfering - as does my incredible position as a moderator on this site! :D Actually there have been very few problems lately - a bit of a disappointment as I love to kick butt!

I did the announcement yesterday that I will not be Treasurer for the Board for the next term - elections at end of October. What a relief to me - not to them! Now the begging me to stay begins but I will not change my mind! I still will be working my butt off (I wish!) until the end of my term but it's nice to know I will have my summer back next year. Harry and the dogs are delighted. It's pretty damned sad when you have a travel fund and folks to visit and can't find a way to get away during the summer! **** - I can hardly find a free Saturday for Dim Sum.

Rock Hudson is dead? Not really my type anyhow. What about Robert Wagner? Leonard Cohen? Too gloomy. This is going to be difficult.

Really have to get over to LC and do my thing.

I hope you all have an incredible weekend.

UGH, I hate weekends for dieting! It is only 10am & I have already cheated. Hubby & the kids are going to the cottage next weekend for the whole week, so I started packing the snacks & things for them for up there. Hubby loves tastykake Peanut Butter cakes, so I bought box...then decided to open 1 pack to eat just 1 of them....then I just saw the other one sitting there, just begging to be eaten. Oh well, back on track for the rest of the day!

Our Cottage is on Loughborough Lake, are you familar with that area. It is maybe 30 minutes from Kingston. I can't take a week to go this year. I just changed jobs about a month ago, & the little vacation that I earn this year I have to save for our trip to Disney at Christmas time. Jeff is taking the kids up the the week with all of his family. I can't admit this to them, but I actually am looking forward to the entire week at home, with no one to answer to but myself! Besides that cottage is too small for all of us "Waltman Women" to be in at once anymore. My sister in law & I being the outsiders always end up ticked at one of the "in siders" (My MIL & her daughter)

Well I need to finish the housework if I want to go lounge at the pool this afternoon. I wonder how many hours I have to swim laps to work off the 250 calories from the cakes?

Happy Birthday, Dentrassi!!!!
xoxo Ellis

I second that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Happy Birthday! :D :hb:

:)squeak

Evening everyone! :wave:

It is now Sunday Evening an I have been MIA for two days...

I had a fun weekend but was totally off plan.
Went to a bridal shower and tried to eat well but caved by eating some cake and a couple of phyllo cranberrie/brie bundles.

Then we had friends over for supper and had a good healthy dinner with a couple of glasses of sangria. The four of us went for an after dinner walk :angel: which ended up in a candy store :nono: where I tried to be good by picking up jelly bellys but ended up eating half an Aero mint chocolate bar later on:(
Oh well, maybe it will all even out in the end:) (ms. positivity, yeah, that's me :dizzy: )

Speaking of cake...HAPPY BIRTHDAY DENTRASSI:hb:

Christina- I know what you mean about being alone occasionally, we all need some down time no matter how much we love our family and friends...Your son's take on life in Canada is pretty funny!

Ruthxxx-Robert Wagner is still pretty hunky! Leonard Cohen may become so enamored of you he would write a song about you...

Ellis, Squeeker, Soozie and Tiggerdiva-hope you all had a great weekend and enjoyed the weather:) Nice to see some sun!

Fluid_Fiction-where are hiding these days girl? Hope everything is okay...

Goodnight all!:yawn:

HIYA!!!! Thanks for all the birthday wishes!!! Just got back from our trip Friday evening, and celebrated yesterday. Trying to get back in the swing of things now. My MIL has the same birthday, and gave me a bar of "Total ***** Soap" as part of my gift!! She is great, and we tease each other a lot. Except for the fact that she is a skinny ***** she would fit in well here!!!!

Soozie and Christina-WELCOME!! To you both!!! WOW, I was missing for a few days and things start popping!!

Soozie-I'm 4' 11" on a good day, weigh 209 pounds (have lost 16), don't shave my pits or my legs, have short hair, don't do my nails or wear make up (usually-I like to play dress up every so often) and am basically hetero. My sister, who is a Lesbian is 5' 6", weighs 135ish, has longer hair (still kinda short), shaves sometimes, and doesn't wear make up or do nails. I wear those big old white undies too, and hate it!!! Anything smaller than a brief (especially a thong) and I'm afraid it would get lost!!! Also, I keep saying this, and I'm gonna have to say it again. DON'T WORRY ABOUT THE LENGTH OF YOUR POST!!!! I for one am VERY nosey, and feel the longer the better!!!

Christina-Lucky you to have the cabin!!! We just got back from a two day trip to the UP (sorry Tigger!!), first vacation in 3 years. Wish it could have been longer!!! I understand completely what you mean about the kids growing up so quickly. Mine are now 15 and 12, and I can't believe I have one in high school and one in middle school!!!

Mauvairoux-Sounds like our eating patterns have been highly similar. I've been doing REALLY well at balancing my eating between the four food groups. Fat/Sugar/White Flour/Booze. I agree with you about kilts, single malt scotch and bagpipes. Don't know about haggis though!!! Have they fixed the stairs yet?

Ruth-You need to think outside the envelope!! You are in your sexual prime right now, so you need a man in HIS sexual prime. In other words, someone younger who can keep up with you. Sorry you didn't make it to the dog show, but I am STILL laughing about *****y-drawers comeuppance!!!!

Squeak-When are you leaving on your trip again? Glad you are getting away for a while. I know you are going to have fun!!!

Tigger-Too bad you can't get away this summer!! The UP is wonderful, although this year is BAD for mosquitos, so if you have to miss a year this is the year to miss!!!

Shel-We passed through Saginaw on the way up, and I was sending good vibes your way, so I hope you received them!! Of course sometimes I am bad luck, so hope they didn't misfire!!!

Ellis-What is up with you? Are you going to your cottage too? That sounds so idyllic....Wish we could win the lottery and just hang out all the time!!! We could just fly everyone in for a vacation, it would be great!!!

Hello everyone! Happy Belated Birthday Dentrassi, it is very nice to meet you! If your post is any indication of how you really are, you sound like you quite a fun one & add a lot to the sight! I am so glad that I found you guys, this one is very upbeat & fun! I tend to come here when I am trying to avoid eating a "no-no" so I needed a site with lots of updates, since I am tempted many times through out the day! Sometimes I am not so sure that having the cottage is a lucky thing! I love it when I am there, but man a few Deer Fly bites, added with some in-laws, & a husband that as soon as we cross the border forgets that he has children & heads to the lake till dark, really makes me wonder! :lol: (Just kidding, it is really nice) Although I am anxious to see how he does up there with out me next week. Of course he will have some help with "Grandma & the Aunts" there. I hope that they don't totally take over for him!

A girlfriend from High School is coming up this weekend, she is my "fat friend" (& no she would not be offended!) Whenever we are together all we do is eat! She has promised me that she will not let me cheat & will be supportive!

Well I guess that I should start to look like I am trying to work! Not very motivated today though, so it is going to be tough!

good morning all you wanna-be-thin girls

Tigger, thanks for your support re: my daughter and I. Ruth... ditto. :) She's doing quite well, thank you. Particularly as there are only 3 days left of school. I still have to draw up a summer schedule for the kids so that I can have a little time to myself and don't lose my mind. Did I tell you that our psychologist told me to make a pie graph? I have to allocate so much time to each person/activity. Let's see.... half to playing computer games, a quarter to writing into fatchicks....

Den, what do you mean you're "basically" hetero? :lol: I haven't shaved my armpits for 3 years. I've shaved my legs once this year. I'm finally starting to not give a damn. I always figure that if I were thin, then I REALLY wouldn't give a damn. Don't wear makeup, either. Unless it's a very special occasion, and then I put mascara on my eyebrows to conceal the grey hair. I hate nail polish, but my daughter wears all these funky colours and I thought I'd try it on my toenails. Don't have short hair though. It's an insecurity thing.
You would LOVE my gay sister-in-law!! She is such a friggin' hoot!!

Oh, God, speaking of gay, my favourite author just died!! Timothy Findley. I'm so sad. :(

Mauvais... jelly bellys... I LOVE them!! Coconut, pina colada, chocolate pudding...

Christina, have fun with your highschool fat girlfriend!

Yip yip... Ruth has refused to be Treasurer!! Good for you, Ruth. You must feel great. The word "no" can bring such a sense of release.

Squeak, how are you? And Soozie? Who have I missed? Shel? Whatcha doin'?

Hey, long weekend coming up. Canada's birthday, don't you know. Damn, and my mom's birthday. Do we go to the cottage and die on the highway, or do we stay at home and relax?

dear Chickies,
Hi girls. I had a busy, busy weekend. Had a dinner party at my Dad's house and invited some of my sisters and my cousins and their hubbies. Dad is in his 80's and lives alone. Thought it would be nice to host the party at his house and use his kitchen. It was nice but now its Monday and I'm pooped.

My daughter has her first tennis class today then I go to work and camp starts tomorrow. I still can't believe they have tennis for five year olds but her little friend from school signed up and wanted my daughter to come along for moral support!! So, we'll be there. Its going to be in the 90's here today and HUMID. I wish I was a more negligent parent and could let my kid watch tv in airconditioning all summer instead of accompanying her out in the HEAT. oh well......maybe I'll sweat off a few pounds. :)

Girls, I cant' believe you're all runnin around with hairy armpits, someone's bound to think you're alittle weird. :dizzy: Den, thanks for your self description and you too Ellis. I also wondered about the basically hetero line:)

I'm five foot one inch and I do cling to that one inch and I'm about 194lbs, right now, of course after watching tennis today I'll be 189 !!! I do shave but please don't tell, don't want anyone to know that I'm breaking the rules :)
I always put alittle lipstick on when I go to work, don't know why but I do. My hair is short, so much easier to take care of and faster in the morning. Lately I'm obsessed with getting manicures. My nails look lovely if I must say so myself.

I've always been curvey. Except when I was a little kid. Once adolescence hit I grew boobies and got round. I was never really fat though, but I always thought that I was fat. Sometimes I think that's why I got fat, fighting my natural weight which was full-figured but not unhealthy and not accepting my body, always thinking it was too big and too fat, now I am fat!!!! My family didn't help much, Mom was always on a diet and never was fat. She often commented on what I ate as did Dad. I have a bunch o'sisters, the one closest in age to me was naturally thin, naturally. She still is slim and shapely. Yet I love her...inspite of her body:lol:

My eating has been uncontrolled. I'm not really on a program right now. Have to think about a structure and stick with it. The gym helps when I go regularly. Its such a natural high to exercise and I just eat better when I'm feeling that good about myself. My goal is to exercise three times this week.

My demons are chocolate and time. As in, I'm starving and don't have time to prepare and get to something healthy. Just grabbing anything between running around with work and the kid's schedule and trying to keep the house from total mess.

I'm glad to have met you ladies and feel really ready to get my real body back. I know its under here somewhere.
Talk to you soon . Soozie

Soozie, aren't the kids so cute when they start something so young? My soon started Soccer when he was 4, so funny! We spent more time yelling "go the other way", than anything! My daughter tries soccer, but she honestly does not really enjoy, yet every year when I ask if she wants to play she says yes. Next year she starts 2 hour long dance classes, I think at that point she will have to decide what she really wants to commit to. Just too many activities. I try to let them do any groups that they want, thinking that they will find one that they love & dedicate the time to that & slowly drop the others...well so far, they each found a love, but refuse to drop anything.

The party sounds very nice! I love entertaining, but then regret it when I see the expense & the mess! :)

I too am guilty of the uncontrolled eating! I was always thin through high school, while the rest of my family ate poorly & was very heavy, I could eat with them & still be fine. Well suddenly I got married & just woke up one day fat. (not really but it was one day that I woke up & realized it!) Then I realized that I can not open a bag of cookies & have one. I can open them & leave them there on the counter, but once I have one, they are history! The weight has been dropping rather quickly since I started this, (30 pounds in 11 weeks) But I have hardly cheated at all, I am worried about when I try to incorporate the "no-nos" again, that I will have problems again. I guess that I will have to slowly add something on a regular basis, until I know that I can live with eating just 1 or 2 of something.

Well once again, I have rattled on! Have a good day everyone! (a little slow at work right now, so I am sure that I will be back soon!)

HELLO!!!!!

Just got back from Psych appointment for son, Costco, and now I've got cramps. OH! The joys of perimenopause!!! "Basically hetero"-I've been attracted to women, but considering I'm in a long term hetero relationship (20 1/2 years married, 2 years together before that), it is kind of a moot point. I HATE shaving my pits, because they get really aggravated. Occassionally I'll shave my legs, but I'm basically lazy. And people have thought I was weird since i was a small child, so anything different and it would be too scary!!!

Soozie-Like you, I started out thinking i was fat when I wasn't. Sick, isn't it? I look at pictures of myself from that time period and just shake my head....WHAT THE **** WAS I THINKING? WHY DIDN'T I APPRECIATE IT WHILE I HAD IT? (Whatever "IT" is!!!)

Christina-I do uncontrolled eating too. For me it is ESPECIALLY bad with things like french fries. Basically anything deep fried and salty is a problem. Although it can also be sweet things depending on what they are...... Yes, I am a ton of fun!! (LITERALLY!!) But watch out when i am feeling down, whew!! RUN FOR COVER!!!!

Squeak-I forgot to answer your question!! I think what the Shiva is like depends on the family. My friend's family sat from 1 pm on each day (7 days), and had a service each night at 7pm. We went after the service, and at that point it was like a party!! We actually ran into people we had met elsewhere and had a great time!! Even my friend was able to laugh it up a bit. I'm sure at other times, and with other people there it was calmer though!!

Ellis-Glad your kids are getting out soon!! I know what you mean about maintaining time and space for yourself though!!! Listen, EVERYONE yells sometimes. I mean just today at Costco I was *this close*!! DS #2 was asking for a computer game and a book, and pop and....all this after we had ice cream too!! And "NO" isn't good enough, because you see "We ALWAYS buy things for his brother and not for him, and we keep on saying he should read more, so why WON'T we buy him a STAR WARS book that is ONLY $15, and the computer game is cheap and works on the MAC, and why can't he see his friends 'cause after all it is summer now?" I'm with you on the fun colors by the way. If I had a daughter with blue nail polish I'd borrow it too!! Just doesn't seem worth buying it when I know I'd only wear it about once a year!!!

Ruthxxx-I grew up in a Jewish neighborhood too!! My best friend was Jewish, and I went to services with her on a semi-regular basis. My family is not religious, so I probably learned more about Judaism than any other religion growing up!! We'd go down to my friend's house to light the candles at Channukah, (and eat potato latkes of course!!!) and they'd come down to help us decorate the tree. We are still in touch, but she lives in California so I don't get to see her too often. Last time was 3 years ago for her son's Bar Mitzfah. I always thought that I'd grow up and marry a nice non-religious Jewish boy and instead I married an Italian/Norwegian. I like to describe him as passionately depressed!!!

Mauvairoux-You are probably checking in later today, so I will sling rude comments in your direction later!!!

Shel-WHERE ARE YOU? HOW ARE YOU? COME OUT AND PLAY!!!

quick drive by post -
Hi chicks! :wave:

Hope everything is going well!

The plan went right out the window on Friday and stayed gone all weekend. With the mood I was in I honestly didn't give a *insert your favorite 4 letter word here*. I was stressed out and I think I had a headache for like a week straight. I didn't just kinda cheat, I ate massive amounts of food in 3 days. Oh well. Today is going much better. Slightly less stressed and 9 more days until I am out of here. :) I almost left on Friday, but I had to go into work on Sunday and didn't feel like driving the 7 hours.

I will come back later after my nap. :yawn:

:spin:squeak

Hmm, just finished logging all of my food for the day...calorie count is only 673...does that mean that I can have ice cream to make up the other 500 calories that I am short? :nono:

Hey Non-shavers, when you get tired of combing it, you could shave, might be 5 pounds of hair in those pits! :lol: Just kidding, If the leg hairs didn't keep me up at night digging into my other leg, I might be tempted to try to skip it too.

Squeak...A NAP! I am so jealous! I love to nap on the couch, problem is I beleive that someone must hang a big sign over me to annoy me as soon as a lay down. It never ceases to amazee me how helpless the others can be as soon as I want to escape!

Well girls I need to go ride that blessed exercise bike! See you all tomorrow!

Squeak squeak, are you having a little nap?! How cozy. Massive amounts of food, huh? That was me today. I can't believe it... I ate two little bowls of chocolate icing. I haven't done that for MONTHS! And I just had a little bag of chips. And two glasses of pop. My day is shot. I'm glad to hear you did better today.
Hey, when you holiday, are you camping/B&Bing/hoteling/moteling or what? My husband winter camped there once. Well, it was November. Looked very beautiful in the pictures. And damned cold.

Den, I thought I was the only hetero attracted to women. I mean, I don't want to have sex with them, but I find it much more interesting looking at women's bodies than men's. I think it may be partially a respect thing, too. I don't appreciate most men... and I don't want to. :lol: Their motives are not of interest to me. Their minds are not in line with mine.

Soozie... a five year old playing tennis... that is so cute!! My gosh, imagine the wrist she's going to have!
Having dinner with your dad... that sounds so nice. He must be in fairly good health to live alone. I know how it feels to get pooped out visiting parents, but you made your dad happy. :) I visited MY parents on the weekend. For the most part they look good, but sometimes they look so old... it makes me sad. :(
Hey, is your partner slim?

Extracurricular activities, Christina... what a nightmare! We've had our daughter in swimming, dance, skating, karate, softball, baseball, soccer... you name it!! She gets to make her own choice this summer. We were going to let her off the hook because she didn't want to do anything, but her psychologist said that it was important for her to do one activity outside of school. And we're going to start our son in soccer this summer, although his sister's been teaching him baseball, and he looks to be a natural!

Den, I like your passionately depressed description. :lol:

Hi everyone else :wave:

Later, darlings....

Evening all!:D

Okay, so I have to admit it, I am a bit of a glamour girl :o
I shave everything, won't leave the house without lipstick or at least lipgloss and mascara, and have enough nailpolish that I could wear a different one everyday for 2 weeks straight:lol: I do my toes and my fingers.
The only things I don't wear are foundation (can't stand the way it feels on my skin and can never find the right shade anyway) and eyeshadow (don't know how to put it on right and end up looking like someone punched me in the eye, so there is no point).

I used to think I was fat in grade school and most of high school.
I guess if enough people tell you that you end up believing it. When I look back at those pictures I can see that I may have been a bit stocky but I was not fat. I also had a bigger body frame than most of the other girls but now that I am 5"8 it all makes sense now:)

I think that the worst moment for me as a kid was the time I was at a friend's house having dinner when her grandfather turned around and said to her mother in Italian that the white girl had a
fat ***, not realizing that I could understand Italian. Funny how you can't forget some things....

I know what you all mean about snacking...I can't have chips or oreos in my house or I will eat the entire bag:devil:
Right now I can honestly say that there are no temptations in my house. I have Tostitos and salsa, veggies and fruit to snack on.
I have learned over the past year to just not buy the stuff because if it is there I will eat it, if it is not I don't even think about the stuff or get cravings. Out of sight-out of mind I guess;)

Yay!:) My stairs are open again! I am trying to get back into the habit of taking them again. I am also thinking of taking an aquafit class with a friend of mine who is also trying to lose weight. I am digging my little handweights out of the back of the hall closet so I can try to tone up my arms a little.

Costco-the warehouse of impulse shopping! I swear I just go in to pick up one or two things and end up coming out with a cartload of stuff:lol: I don't even go down the aisle at the front where all the boxes of chocolate bars and candies are...way too tempting :T.

Okay, I am going now! You are all wearing off on me and making me ramble on now:lol:

Have a good night everyone!

Hi all!
I am procrastinating! I have a policy analysis due bright and early in the AM, and I am just starting it. I never write my papers until the last second!

Christina: I hear you on enjoying time to yourself at home. My fiance was out of town for the weekend, and although I missed him, it was a nice break. I was supposed to accomplish a lot (like that paper), but I had so much fun with friends and relaxing that I didn't get to accomplish much but peace of mind! I am jealous that you're headed to Disney over Christmas! My fiance and I have been there three times, and we love it more each time! It's one of those places you never grow out of! I hope you and your family have a blast! It's also nice to hear about all the extracurricular activities your kids are involved in. (Same for you Soozie and Ellis.) I did so much stuff as a kid that my parents were lucky that I was the only child they had to cart around. It made such a difference later on in my life that I think if kids are blessed enough to have parents so supportive and encouraging, like you all, then they should take advantage of all they can.

Den: HAPPY BELATED BIRTHDAY! Sorry I didn't get to post sooner, but I hope your day was special. I'm glad to hear you had fun on your get-a-way. Those are the best. We try to go away at least once a month, but with my area of work, I feel like I have to abandon all reality for a weekend every month so that I can maintain control the rest of the time. We're headed somewhere this weekend, but we haven't decided where yet. Where did you go in the UP? I know what you mean about the mosquitos--I was up north this time last year, and at sundown, I looked down at my feet, thought to myself, "I'm not wearing black socks," and realized I was covered with mosquitos. I'm not complaining, though. I hadn't been bit in over ten years! (I also don't get brain freezes, weird, I know!) BTW, you are not weird--you're wonderful! One more thing, thanks for mentioning that "basically hetero" comment (I think someone else did, too, so thanks to you, too). We all live on a continuum of heterosexuality, and most people think that no one is absolutely, 100% hetero. It's nice that you acknowledge that, and I appreciate your sharing it!

Mauvaisroux: Don't feel bad about having a good time! Bridal showers and fun with friends comes along with happiness and good memories. As much as I want to be thin, I wouldn't give it up if it meant I could have a blast with others. You deserve to enjoy yourself, especially after the hard work you've been up to. Take it in stride and know that you earned the right to eat something you want!

Ellis: I'm glad to hear things are good with you and your daughter. It's not easy to be a parent! (As eloquently illustrated by Den's description of her son in Costco!) You are a caring person, and your love for her shines through your postings. I'm sure that even in the toughest times, she feels what all the rest of us read. As for her psychologist, I am the first to tell everyone that mental health providers have lost their own sense of reality. It often happens that they don't stop to think what will work best for YOU, but instead they want you to bow at their latest invention. My families tell me horror stories all the time, and I don't know how people who suck so bad are actually in the field. (Not implying of course that your psychologist sucks, but rather that s/he had a crazy idea!)

Soozie: Congrats for your daughter's venture into tennis! That stuff does wonders for self-esteem and confidence, especially in girls. I know she appreciates you sweating your behind off, and it sounds like she's got a great mom! I know what you mean about clinging to that extra inch of height. I'm 5'2 and a HALF! If someone doesn't write that 1/2, I whine until it is added (and I'm someone who normally doesn't complain about anything!). I'm also ready for my body to be normal again. I just haven't felt like myself, and I hate that I feel so down on myself. I, too, was thinner in high school and considered myself horribly overweight. In retrospect, I was about 115 lbs! What was I thinking! Hindsight is 20/20, right! Since then, I have gained so much weight that I can deal with it anymore. I'm so unhappy when I look in the mirror, and it really effects my entire self-image. For someone who works so hard to be successful at everything else, it's silly to stay so hung up on my weight for so long. I could go on and on about this, but I will stop here!

Sqeak: I know what you mean about those down moods. I get into those when I feel like how I described above. My biggest problem is that I've been out of control with my weight for so long that I think that I've wasted my life. I even turn down invitations to certain things for reasons related to my weight. I hope your mood has improved, though, and just keep in mind that Lake Placid is not that far off! Hang in there!

Ruth: CONGRATS on saying NO! It's the hardest word, but with the biggest personal impact. I do an activity with my families where I make one person ask the other a million questions, and the listener can just say "NO" over and over. It's so hard because we usually put others before ourselves, and we all deserve to take it back.

That brings me to my biggest news, and hopefully you all will not think I'm cruel for doing this! I work at an after-school (AS) program and in the summer, it is a day camp. The AS program directors have really taken advantage of me in the past--in ways I won't bother to bore you with here. It's been severe, though, and I have never complained. This summer, however, I am disappointed because I am cutting back on hours at my other jobs to help with the summer program. The directors have again made it clear that I am not valued, and they have given me a limited role in the program. I know that despite the role expectations, I would have to do their jobs, just like in the AS program. Besides, I am paid less there per hour than at either of the other two places I work. So, I decided to tell them that I can't work at the summer program after all. It is much, much, much, much better for me because I will be able to work a more normal schedule at the remaining two jobs (ie-a 8-9 hour day) whereas I would have been working some 12 hour days if I tried to do the summer camp, too. I will make more money, and I will not have to deal with those stupid, ridiculous co-workers who want their pay for my labor. It is a bit of a vindictive way to get back at them for their prior wrongs, but I feel much better about my summer. In the end, it works best for all of us because those directors will actually have to work for their money instead of relying on me! WOW, that took more time to explain than I thought. I won't apologize, otherwise Den will yell at me! Thanks for reading it all, though! I do very much appreciate you all and I'm glad I joined this thread. Hope you all have a great week!

Tigger

Tigger, Good for you for standing up for yourself! I am sure that in the long run you will see how that was long over due! I know where you are coming from about your weight sucking all the life out of you! When I think about how I have let my weight make me miss some great times I want to kick myself! I was able to grow up without the influence of a Father (luckily he grew up & is now wonderful!), & my Mother was just about worthless other than providing shelter. (She on the other hand has only gotten worse, but that would take an entire thread alone to sort through that mess) Anyway with the parenting that I had I was still able to grow up a pretty decent kid, no drugs, OK in school, no real behavior problems. Lived on my own since 17 & put myslef through college, & was able to land a job that I love & pays well enough that if, not that I am planning to at all, but if I ever decide to kick hubby to the curb, my kids & I wil still be above poverty level! Yet, I can't overcome the weight! Well hopefully that is changing as we speak! I finally made to a Healty weight, granted at the tippy top of the chart, but still healthy! So hang in there, & remember even if we never make to our dream size we are all still wonderful!

I can't wait to go to Disney! I went for the first time ever 2 years ago! We weren't back a month till I started planning our next trip. This time we are not worring about the money & doing it right. Last time we scrimped over every penny we spent! This time I have been saving & plan to just enjoy it!

Well I need togo face the scale & see where I am at! Have a good day everyone!

hey Tigger... I hope to heck you got your policy analysis completed!! :lol: I was the same... last minute. I always thought that the last minute ones were better than the ones I labored over for days.

Listen, that after school program... screw it!! Don't even think about it! I know how you feel... you're abandoning the kids... but that's NOT your fault. You can't deplete your own self for the sake of those lazy workers. You'd only become resentful and unhappy, and then you'd be of no use to ANYONE! I think you've made a great decision. We're very proud of you. :)
And good for you for not apologizing to us. :lol: We're glad you joined this thread, too. You're very entertaining and VERY nurturing. (god knows we LOVE being nurtured!)

Speaking of nurturing, thank you so much for your kind words regarding my daughter and I. You are an absolute dear, and we all love you.

Speaking of deers, you should see the hilarious thing I bought at a garage sale on the weekend. It's this "lighted picture". Something from the 60's I think. It's a box with a picture of mountains/trees/etc as the background. There is a plastic deer (a buck) stuck in front of the picture. (poor thing's searching for a mate, no doubt) The box is covered with a piece of decorative glass in a "frame" shape, and there is a concealed light bulb in the box so that you can plug it in. And it's got a "stand" so that you can stand it on your TV. (their own words from the back of the picture) It's a friggin' hoot!!!

Okay, where is everyone? :wave:

Hello everyone!
:wave:

I was off sick from work today-I think I had a stomach bug.
I spent most of the day sleeping and watching crappy daytime tv.

Tiggerdiva-don't sweat saying no the day camp, there is only so much you can do at a time. You need to look after yourself and your own interests, and I don't think you are mean saying no.

Ellis-your new art acquisition sounds divine! My tackiest find was a white plastic Jesus nightlight from the Dollar Store. The package even said "let him light your way" so of course I had to buy it! :lol:

Christina-you sound like you had a pretty tough upbringing...kudos to you for rising above it and becoming the person you are! :)

Soozie-hope your daughter has fun with the tennis. I think it really helps kids when they have outside interests. I used to play soccer in grade school and high school. It was great!

Squeek-hope your are in a better mood today, just keep your holiday and seeing your friend in mind as a mood booster!

Dentrassi-sounds like you had a great holiday!

Ruthxxx-how are you doing these days? Hope your garden is coming along but that you are still taking care of your arm :)

Fluid_Fiction-haven't seen you posting lately-hope you are okay...

I may check in later with you all!

Hi chicks! :wave:

Even though my posts have been somewhat erratic I come in here to read everyone's at least twice a day. Once before work and once after. :) And thank you all for the support!!!!

Things are a little nuts. Work just seems like I have been working my *** off to fall farther behind. 2 major projects, one of which I am unoffical project semi-lead. The lead has had some major problems at home so is only working a few days a week. Plus all of the BAU (business as usual) stuff (and the reason I had to drag my butt into work at 7 on Sunday morning). Though it is slightly good on the plan since I eat lunch at my desk and that means I have to eat what I brought from home. Though it is also why I ate everything that wasn't nailed down over the weekend.
But 8 more days and I am off. It seems to be perfect timing. It is bad I have already planned what I want to bring with me? :) and the new running joke in the office is I am eloping when I go there. We are going to skip dating, go straight to marriage. As one of the girls said "Dating is over rated" (esp. if you have already done the dating thing once) Ok so the boy doesn't know we are eloping, but that's ok. ;)

Mauvais- Hope you are feeling better! Daytime tv is pretty crappy isn't it? Talk shows, soaps, & lawyer shows.

Ellis - And just what do you plan on doing with that silly picture? It sounds just bizarre :) I am staying at hostel where the boy is. He gets a room w/ a roommate, I get a bunk room. :p Though I am thinking of getting a hotel room for the weekend. I am normally not very much of the outdoors-type. I like hiking for a few hours, but I don't camp unless it involves a cabin with electricity & indoor plumbing. And then, not for long. I am very much a city girl. :)

Christina - Congrats on the healthy weight! And have a blast in Disney & all the time by yourself. The only reason I can nap is because I live alone. The only people that bother me are telemarketers, and them I hang up on.

Tigger - How did the paper go? As for the job - it sounds like too much for too little, I don't blame you for not doing it.

Den - The shiva sounds both good and draining. I think out of the different types of religious things I have gone to, temple was the most interesting.

Soozie - I am also 5' 1" and you better believe I hold on to it. My best friend is 6'2", so we look a little silly in pictures most of the time. The best are him sitting and me standing. I used to stand on my living room table to be a little taller then him. The other sad part was I out weighed him for a while. I am not sure if I still do. He won't tell me any more.

And I am with you girls on the basically hetero thing. I can definately appreciate a woman's body, but it doesn't quite "do anything" for me. :)

Ruthxxx - Can you still garden in all this heat?

Ok, enough for tonight.

Night all!

:spin:squeak

Hi everyone! What a crappy day! We are in the heart of 2003 Budget planning, so everyone is snippy at work! Then I come home to 2 kids that can't look at each other without the fighting starting! Tonight it actually got to the point of physical, not just nasty words! Well Mommy now has 2 game boys, & 2 collections of CDs. After turning them in & getting the speeach how we are a family & we need to be respectful & loving to each other, they leave, aren't even out of my sight & they start pinching each other! After I gave myself the same speech to prevent me from beating them both! I did something I thought I never would! They both have to write "I will be not be mean to my sister/brother" 50 times! So far Alli has about 15 & Zach about 20, I don't know what else to do besides lock them in a room & let them fight it out until someone dies! Now I know why I am an only child!

While my parents were far from the best, it could have been a lot worse! They never abused me, they just never bothered with me, which given the 2, I got the better! I just think back now & realize how much I could have gotten in to & chose the wrong paths, & no one would ever have known. It could have been much worse though! & if nothing else, it taught me what type of parent not to be!

Well I finally did something tonight that felt great! Went through all of my clothes & donated all the "fat stuff" to Good Will! Anything the least bit too big or frumpy went in the bag! I went from a stuffed closet, dresser & chest to only 1/3 of a closet & a fll underwear drawer! I filled 4 garbage bags full! At least I can't let myself creep back up, nothing to wear if I do!
:smug:

Well I am ready for bed, so catch everyone later!

I just wrote one of my 30 minute short posts, and it was WIPED OUT!!! I'm too tired and cranky to try to duplicate it, so I'M GOING TO BED!!!!!

BOO!!!!

good morning
 

Hey Ladies. Yesterday I made it to the gym thanks to you. I almost wimped out but thought of you and turned the car around and headed for the gym instead of home!!! Thanks for the inspiration. Two more times this week and I'll meet my goal. I also passed up late night snacking which I sometimes do after work.

One of these days I'm going to go back and read your old threads so I'll get to know you alittle better. I'm curious about the issues between you and your daughter Ellis. I can't remember who right now but someone else mentioned going to a psychologist with one of their kids....
anyway...tigger, I do agree with you that most mental health providers are whacked but I have to confess I am a mental health provider. :p

Yes, clinical social worker, therapist.....and only mildly whacko. I really love my work. And feel very committed to my clients.

Ellis, that deer sounds scare-rey!!! You may need some more counseling and soon!!!!

Mauvais, the tennis was too cute. Even tho it was over 90 degrees and humid. We had to keep spraying the kids with water and making them drink so they wouldn't collapse. And of course all the moms looked like we were going to die of heat stroke.

Tigger, congrats on saying "no" to the summer program, you go girl! and don't spend one second feeling bad about taking care of yourself.

Squeak, know what you mean about camping. I worked at girl scout camp for six years or so...if I never see another tent it will be fine... its only a vacation if there are clean sheets, flush toilets, a shower with great water pressure...etc. :)

Chris, we're going to Disney this November. I'm not too excited about it yet because we have so much going on before then but you'll have to give me Disney pointers. We're going with my daughters godmother who has been there a billion times. She loves it and can't wait to take her goddaughter.
I think that it is great that you threw out your fat clothes. what a wonderful feeling that must be. Of course I'm still wearing mine but........

Ruth...thanks for starting alternachicks!!! and my garden is just flowers this year...do you do veggies??? we don't get enough sun for them...but we do annual and per. flowers.

Later girls. have a great day. Soozie

Whatsamatta? Nobody likes my deer! It's a conversation piece! Hey, I just thought of something. It cost a buck. :lol: Get it... a buck for a buck? CORNY!

Huh! That ol' Ruth didn't start Alternachicks! Mauvais did! Huh!
:devil:
Mauvais, are you feeling better sweetie? Stomach thing, huh? The hot weather or something you ate? Or did you just need a little mental health day? We promise not to tell.

Sorry... misconception, Tigger. I actually LIKE the pie graph idea. I was being sort of sarcastic and it didn't come out right. Although I do agree with you about SOME mental health workers. Like the first psychiatrist we saw. All he did was recommend a book for us to read! My daughter voluntarily said that she thought he was a complete dud.
I think the pie graph will be good. Apparently what I'm doing right now is giving a complete pie to EVERYONE. So I have to work with one pie and split it up. I'm terrible at saying "no" to people, so now I have a good excuse. "I'm sorry, but according to my psychologist's instructions, you're not on my pie for this week." :lol:

Squeaker, you are working like a horse!! Take it easy girl, you're going to burn out. Unless you're burning calories, in which case, GO GIRL!! I like your description... "the boy". heh heh. He sounds like a toy. I don't blame you for wanting to stay somewhere comfortable.

Christina, darling... could you email us your fat clothes? Us fatties are a little short of stuff to wear. :lol: 4 garbage bags!! Good for you!

Lil' Den, would you please start "selecting all" and "copy"ing!?!? I want to read your funny posts!! Are you still tired and cranky? Bet you're still in bed, aren't you? ;)

Soozie, I'm so glad that we're motivating you!! ('cause we sure as **** aren't motivating OURSELVES!!) Good working out and eating!!!!
You asked about my daughter and I. In a nutshell (sorry to bore the rest of you again), I've suffered from deep depression since the age of 12 (I'm 37) and finally went for help about 5 years ago. I'm taking Fluoxetine, which; for the most part, works fantastically well. My 12 year old daughter tried to commit suicide about two months ago. Completely unexpected, terribly heartbreaking. I still wake up in the night and check to see that she's in bed. The fear is indescribable. I thank God we've still got her... and things are starting to go really well with the new psychologist.
I was really ill with depression when she was younger (pre-medication) and I did her a lot of psychological damage which I feel guilty as **** for. We don't know if she's clinically depressed or if it's just environmental, but we're doing a lot of great cognitive behaviour stuff with her, and it's really helping.
It's weird... my husband's only been working in the mental health field for the past year... it's a bit of fate. He's so much more knowledgeable now about the issues that are of importance to our family, and his boss has been incredibly supportive. Phew! Dumping... great for relieving stress. :)
I'm glad to hear that you love your work. It must be a real brain-drain at times.

Shel, Ruth, Tigger? How are things? :wave:

Aaaaarrrrrgggggghhhhhh!

I am having trouble keeping up with all this! No, Mauvais started Alternachicks. I will try to find the old threads and bump them up. It got to three pages and I couldn't cope so Mauvais started Alternachicks 2. And then I started this thread when it got too long.

Sorry I've not been posting much. Low Carb has been keeping me busy as has the rest of Life.

Here's what I've been doing...

Busy but not very exciting.

Storm coming through so I'd better get offline before the modem fries!

Me Again! Vent Alert!
 

Now I have something else to add to my list!

We have three trees down in our lane so I can't get the damned car out. Luckily they are near a power source so I may just get to doing my Lumberjack routine with the electric chain saw. Yes, I have one - wanna come to the massacre? :devil:

Stupid weather! The plants from yesterday are flattened to the ground and the tomato plant has holes in it from hail! Who the **** is in charge of the weather these days!

geez Ruth, I've always wanted to use a chainsaw but my dad would never let me. You are the COOLEST!!
Hail? What hail?

bad, bad chick...
 

see? now i've gone and missed Dent's birthday, and the arrival of some charming ladies. *sighs*

here i am, checking in, ashamed to say that there have been three whole pages added since last i looked.

things have been... well, i don't want to say bad, but honestly that's the only way to describe it.

so, that said, i'm going to abuse my privledge as a chick and do some venting. for me this is a pretty big step... i've always been the one to listen to everyone else's problems, and always kept mine in. but, it occurs to me that that behaviour has caused me to hide for the last few weeks, being miserable, and i hate that. so here it goes.... read on if you're brave..... my apologies for my post being self centered.

first of all, how can you love someone, and want them dead all at the same time?? i love my BF. really i do. but after yet ANOTHER fight the other day, he threatened to leave, and i found myself thinking "yeah? GOOD!!".... *sigh* i'd miss him... but i have to wonder if i keep trying because i want this, or if i keep putting up with it all because i just don't want to be alone....

then, there's my mother. we used to be so close, all the time. but ever since i moved back from Kansas, we've been drifting apart. she ~really~ liked the BF that i left there... the first bf that she's accepted since my divorce. she told me on the trip back up here that she's had a hard time over my divorce, and still wasn't over it. EXCUSE ME???? ~she~ didn't get divorced. she didn't have to watch him being the perfect son in law around them, just to turn into this drunken monster when we got back home.... i'm so tired of listening to her question me on why i can't have a nice, normal steady relationship....i know that i'm drawn to bad relationship chioces. i know that my current BF isn't perfect, and could change. but he's not abusive, and he does care for me, and when we're not fighting over stupid things, we're wonderful together. she acts like i've CHOSEN to just not find that one person that i can be completely happy with... like all the choices i've made to this point have been to spite her and what her plans for me were.

my sister is going in for her c-section on friday. laura, the perfect daughter. she married the first boy she fell in love with, just like mom, and gave mom and dad a beautiful granson soon after. she's having a girl this time. Haley Maria. mom has known for a week that she was going in friday for this.... and never bothered to call me. i want the best for my sister.... i love her so much, but sometimes i just want to scream because i feel so jealous of her.... she has the family that i've so desperately wanted for so long..... while i'm still struggling, trying to figure life out.

i'm frusterated, really.... this is NOT where i planned to be at 31. i didn't think that i would be struggling still, scrambling to pay rent, driving an old car, making do with everything, and not happy with what or who i am. aren't you supposed to have things figured out by now? so why don't it???

wow.... what a rant. i'm just so tired of being unhappy... and of not being motivated enought to change it. that's the biggest problem. how much worse do things have to get before i do something? i went through a really bad time in college. i didn't get out of bed for three weeks. the other day it was all i could do to ~NOT~ go in and climb under the covers and shut my eyes, because i just ~KNEW~ that it would happen again. does that sound pathetic? 'cause it sure as **** sounds pathetic to me.....

well, if you're still with me, thanks for letting me get that out. if you're one of the new girls, trust me, i'm usually much more cheery and not nearly so self centered. *s* please excuse the horrible first impression.

gonna slink off and drink some more water now. you can imagine what my food intake has been lately, being a stress eater. *sigh* gonna weigh in tomorrow. i PROMISE - you all as well as myself - that i'll post in. thanks again.....

Shel

hi
 

Hey Mauvais, sorry that I gave Ruth the credit...thank YOU for starting Alternachicks!!!
how long have you chicks been at it???
Ellis, so sorry to hear about your daughter. . Must have been awful and terrifying. Glad stuff is going well with the therapist. I always say that that relationship is critical. If you don't like and trust the clinician after a few visits get out!! The therapeutic relationship is critical to getting anything out the the therapy...technique is less important than genuine concern, empathy, connection, and intelligence. Don't spend too much time feeling guilty about what you did wrong when you're kid was younger and you were more depressed...its such an energy drain and you need your energy for the present moment to help your kid and yourself heal.
Well, ladies, onto part two of my day........Soozie

Shel, nice to meet you. Hope you stick with your plan to keep in touch even though the bad times...thats a big part of why we're all here!!!!!!

Soozie, thank you so much for your support. :) It's greatly appreciated.

Shel sweetie, I'm so sorry you're down. Don't stay away again when you're feeling bad... like Soozie said, we're here for you, okay?
You know what? Contrary to what everyone else may think, you don't have to be in a certain position at a certain age in your life. ****, 31 is young!! By the time I had my very first boyfriend at the age of 21, everyone else had had sex about 100 times at least!
It's all relative, sweetie.
Listen, my best friend got married at 39. She'd dated at few jerks... not one nice one in the bunch. Now she's just had a baby... she'll be 40 this year. In one year she went from being what she felt was "completely miserable" (man-less, car-less, computer-less and living in a one-bedroom apt) to bang bang bang... married, a baby, a house, two cars, a riding mower, six computers and a great husband. YES!! IT CAN BE DONE!! And 39 isn't the cut-off date, either. Fate is waiting for you right around the corner, Shel.
The biggest thing you have to do is to learn to feel good about yourself. Then you can handle the rest of the stuff. You'll KNOW if you should leave your boyfriend. You'll be able to acknowledge that your mom is not too supportive and it doesn't really matter... she's just a mother. Let her go. HER feelings are HER problem.
And your sister? I bet you anything that your sister is just a little envious of YOU sometimes. I know I used to envy my girlfriend when she was still single. When she'd go home from work, put on her pyjamas and curl up with a book and a snack... all by herself!! It still sounds like heaven to me!
Hey, don't get under those blankets... I know exactly how you're feeling. We don't want you stuck under them crying, okay? Get out and do something that makes you feel good...
Is there anywhere that you can go for some help? Do you have drop-in support groups anywhere nearby? You have to tell people that you feel crappy, okay? And that you need help or support. I always thought that someone would read my mind and come to my rescue, but it ain't gonna happen. You've got to go and get it yourself. And you're strong... you can do it, Shel!!
gotta run...love ya.... take care...

Wow you chicks have laying down some heavy posts here!

Shel, just reading your post has brought tears to my eyes! Not to be mushy, but here is a hug! ( ) I think that you need one! Do not feel bad about venting! Heaven knows after I spend time with the outlaws, I will be here venting! I have been married for 11 years now, but I can honestly say, I am not sure how we made it past some of those fights the first few years! That is part of why I put on so much weight! I was miserable for the first 4 years, I only had my first child to appease him & figured that at least when I finally did leave I would have someone to love. Somehow we are coming full circle. With the birth of Zach suddenly we started connecting again & there was a reason to try to stay together. We did get back to the point that we enjoyed each others company. The bedroom still suffered for years, I couldn't stand the thought of him seeing me like I was. But even that is turning around as the weight is coming off. (OK too much information huh?) Anyway, hang in there. He may be the right one, or maybe the right one is right around the corner & you will be thankful to have had the past that you did so you were molded & just perfect for Mr. Right. (OK I am a hopeless romantic at times too! Sorry I can't help much in the Mother relationship! It sounds like yours came from the same school of parenting that mine did!

Hey anyone that wants the "Fat Clothes" welcome to them! :) I can't wait to hit goal & start filling my closets with new, single digit sized stuff!

Well I need to get going! Hubby is going to kill me if he finds out I came home late because I was "Chatting" Take care everyone!

Hello ladies!

Thanks over and over for your support of my decision to not do the summer camp! Everyone has agreed with me so far, especially those people that know the details. So, it's down to making a difficult phone call to the other directors, and I'm home free! BTW, I did turn in my paper on time, but as usual, I wasn't satisfied with it. I expect too much of myself sometimes!

Christina: It really sounds like you had a lonely time when you were a kid. But it is those rough times that make us stronger. Who knows why your live led the wonderful path that it has, but at least you can have the pride to own up to all that you have chosen to do for yourself. You can't change the past, but it really sounds like you are trying to make up for it by enjoying your present and future. Good for you :)
I know what you mean about the kids driving you crazy! I'm not a parent, but I work with kids all day every day, and sometimes they get the better of you. I think parenting is like the Peace Corps--"The Toughest Job You'll Ever Love". It sounds like you have a good handle on how to deal with them, even if they drive you a little nuts at times. That's what kids are for, right! I am an only child, too, and it wasn't until just recently that I started working with kids. I was scared of them! I had never been around any or even known very many from when I was younger. It's like another world, and when the sun shines, your heart melts; when the wind blows, you push harders; when the storms come, you brace yourself for another day. Hang in there--they're lucky to have you.
Big congrats! It must feel great to let go of those clothes. That's the thing that I can't wait to do once I get my rear in gear.

Ellis: WOW! First of all, I'm sorry that I misunderstood your last post, and thank you for clarifying that. I'm glad you found something that works for you. However, I'm really sorry to hear about the trauma that your family has faced. It must be so terrifying and overwhelming to have faced your daughter's attempted suicide. It also must be difficult to have had so much depression and sadness in your life. I completely agree with Soozie that it is of upmost importance to see a counselor/therapist that makes you feel comfortable. It seems like you and your daughter have found that. Please don't feel guilty about any impact your depression may have had on her. Depression is like any other physical illness, like cancer or pnemonia. There is nothing that you could have done to prevent from feeling that way, and you absolutely were the best parent that you could be at the time. It's wonderful that the two of you are trying to work some things out, but you have to let go of that guilt you feel if you want to move past it. It's fantastic that you found meds that work for you so that you can be yourself again. Thank you for sharing such a powerful story with us.
Thanks also for your kind, kind words! Sometimes, especially in my area of work, it's nice to hear something so positive about yourself. I don't ever take credit for my clients' accomplishments because they are the ones who work for their achievements. So, sometimes I feel like I don't do much, and it's nice to hear that I could be there for you when you needed an ear.

Shel: I'm also sorry to hear that you're having a rough time! You are absolutely NOT self-centered. That is what this group is for. You have some really rough waters that you're swimming in! I know what you mean about the BF and the relationship. It is so hard to have that love and apathy all at once. You have the right approach, though--is it worth it to endure so many more years of this up and down, or is it better to just rip off the Band-Aid and let the wound heal. Know this--you are a wonderful person, and if he isn't meeting your expectations, then you deserve (and will find) someone who will.
I know what you mean about life plans! 31 is so young, and you have a lot of time to achieve whatever you want. Sometimes I think that we don't plan life, it plans us! Just because you don't have everything you thought you would doesn't mean you won't have it. In fact, the friends that I have that got married right out of high school are going through bitter divorces and separations, while the friends who thought they'd never find anyone are enjoying their lives with their soulmates. Your life is going to come together--sometimes you have to realize how much you want something before it falls into your lap. It makes you appreciate it more.
You also touched me when you talked about having a hard time in college. I moved away to college at 17, and it was the worst time in my life for a lot of reasons. Unfortunately, the way that I dealt with it was to eat and eat and eat and eat. So much so that I gained about 50-60 pounds my first semester of school! I have gotten over it by now, but that old habit is still with me, and I don't know if I'll ever be able to change that. It makes me feel like I can't be myself or enjoy my life like I used to because of all this extra weight. It's so silly to let weight stop me from being all that I can be, especially because I really don't let much stop me! I just can't bring myself to feel complete until I can be at a normal weight like I used to be.

Mauv: Are you feeling better? I hope so!

Squeak: So sorry to hear about all the work stress. I like your positive outlook, though, that you are able to stick to your plan. I hate when my work gets crazy like that, but it sounds like you are such a valuable asset to your job, and I hope that they acknowledge all the hard work you're doing.

Den: AAAGGHH! I hate computers sometimes! It always seems like they spaz at the worst possible time. I'm looking forward to hearing from you, though. I am going camping this weekend, and we decided to go to a state park in the thumb. (I have a baby shower to go to on Sunday morning, so I didn't want to go too far away.) I leave for Traverse City in two weeks, and I can't wait!

Ruth: You've been keeping busy! I love gardening, but because I live in an apartment, I really can't have anything fun. I can't wait to buy a house--then I'll be bugging you all the time for gardening tips. When is your reunion?

Soozie: BIG CONGRATS on the gym! I know you are going to meet your goal this week. I hope I didn't offend you with my mental health professionals dump. I am also in the field, and I'll be done with my master's in April. It's been my experience that I look around and wonder why the **** some of those therapists are doing what their doing. Then again, I've met some that have truly inspired me.

This week, I am going to do my best to stick to a plan and not snack. I probably won't have time to work out because I have seven papers due between Monday and Tuesday (that's not a typo either!). Of couse I haven't started them, and I don't plan on working on them over the weekend! I am going to be bad today and order a pizza. I had a rough case at the police station, I'm tired, and I have a lot of work in front of me. I just don't feel like cooking dinner. (I'm never going to lose weight!) What diet plans (if any) do you all follow?

That's it for now. See you all soon! BTW-My name is Kat, and since I almost always write that at the end of my posts on accident, I will just tell you guys so I don't have to delete it anymore!

Kat ;)

Hello everyone! :wave:

I am feeling much better today!
Hubby is downstairs doing laundry so I have the place to myself.
I should actually be doing the dinner dishes but the today's posts are so riveting I cannot tear myself away....Okay, so who am I kidding, dishes have never been a priority for me.
I have to admit to all of you that a this very moment, as I am typing this post, I am eating an Aero chunky chocolate bar:o

Ruthxxx-my! You have been a busy chick haven't you! Your family reunion sounds like fun!

Soozie-your welcome! I am glad that I started this thread and met such fabulous chicks! Way to go on the gym :strong:sounds like you are getting in gear-good for you!

Dentrassi-darn it! I just did the exact same thing as you...I typed half of my post then hit the wrong key and poof! Gone! Arrgh!
I wish I was more computer literate and could quit doing things like that!

Tiggerdiva-just think how good you felt when you finally came to the decision to say no, this will help you face the phone calls to the other directors. Maybe you should keep a large drawing of a big yellow happy face saying " I am freeing myself by saying no "by the phone for inspiration. :)

Ellis- I hope you and your daughter work things out together. Don't feel bad about yourself over it. You can't change what is in the past only what you will do in the future and you are both getting help so that is a step in the right direction.

Christina- that's okay! That is not way too much information. You are totally right the way you feel about your weight and appearance can make you feel totally unsexy and uninterested.
Been through that but am getting better with the loss too. ;)

Squeeker-sounds like you are super busy at work-you are going to need that vacation! Don't beat your self up over the stress eating, I do it too. Just eat well for the next few days and you'll be okay.

Shel-Wow! No wonder you have not been around. I am sorry to hear you are having such a rough time of it. (hugs) It is never easy fighting with someone you love. As for your life plans-you are not alone. I am turning 35 next week, I rent an apartment, I bought a second-hand minivan last summer (the first vehicle I have ever owned), I still don't have any kids, I have had 4 job changes in the last 6 years, I wonder if my life will ever settle down. So much for everything to turn as planned. What's that saying?
"Life is what happens while you are busy making other plans."
I have had people look down on me because they think I am some kind of bohemian freak with a crazy lifestyle while others have envied me for my lifestyle-go figure :shrug:

Most of the people I know who appear to have everything are not any happier than anyone else. In fact they sometimes seem to have even more problems, you don't see what goes on behind closed doors. I don't think anyone has a truly perfect life, they just handle their problems in different ways or find their joy in different things. You need to find out what makes you happy and fulfill yourself. not try to live up to others expectations or stack your life up against theirs.

This is for all of you great ladies- We are all beautiful, unique and talented in our own individual ways and don't let ourselves forget it! :D ( great, now I sound like a bloody greeting card :lol: )

Hugs to all of you!
Mauvaisroux:devil: