[bkstitch]

Hi Girls,
I have been reading your posts for a while now. I turned 50 last December. My life has changed over the past two years. My husband of 22 years left, unexpectedly on a Sunday morning, I had to sell my home and most everything in it. A few months later, my oldest left for college. I have a 18 year old daughter at home with me. My ex got married this year, to a 27 year old woman. I just can't compete with that, nor do I want to. I have been overweight most of my life. When my husband left, he made a comment that I was too old and fat. WOW. After that I went on LA weight loss, lost 27 pounds. It got too expensive and I have gained it all back and more. I have every diet book that has been made. The problem is I just don't know what one to follow. I really need to chose something and just do it. My friend's Dr. recomended to her the South Beach Diet. He said it was a good method I love sweets, seems like I have to have something sweet everynight around 10. I have heard that if you can do the first weeks that would help with the cravings. Please help me make a decision. I am desperate. I need to lose around 50 lbs.

[settie]

Welcome bkstich!

We sound like twins. I turned 50 in December and my husband of 20 years got up one morning and said he was leaving. You're too lazy was his excuse. You gotta love em, NOT.

Anyway, I started WW again on my own this May and I think I am doing pretty well. I couldn't handle the meetings anymore but I find this group so supportive.

I usually post in the 'Over 50 & Getting Lighter ' thread but there are many others - you just have to look around.

I don't think I can help you make a decision but I can try to support you along the way. I think any plan you follow has to be something you can do for life because losing is just the start.

Good luck,

[bargoo]

Just a suggestion, calorie counting is FREE, it is also reliable, flexible you can even have an occaisional sweet as long as you count it in your calorie count of the day.Of course the diet you should pick is the one that you will follow. It is OK to experiment until you find the right one.
Think about this . . how long before the 27 year old looks at her older husband and says "you are too old and fat"?

[meowee]

Have to agree -- the best diet is the one you can stick with -- and forget the word 'diet' altogether -- you must think 'lifestyle change' in order to be successful over the long haul.

Any "diet" will help you take off the weight as long as you follow it; but you have to find your own answer; and it has to be something you can stick to all your life.

If you read the stories about most of the gang in the Maintainers Forum, you will find that they really stress that getting it off is only the tip of the iceberg. Let's face it, if most of us only had to do this once, the diet industry would have gone broke a long time ago.

Good Luck, Chickie . . . you've definitely come to a great place for lots of support as you travel along the long winding road to better health and fitness. Welcome to the Age 50 Plus forum and .

[femmecreole]

I'll be 52 in a couple of months...luckily I got that divorce 16 years ago...but they are not pleasant at any time of life!

I guess a "diet" really has to be a personal choice and what fits in best with your lifestyle. I did a LOT of research into diets that fit in with the way I like to eat (often!) and came across South Beach...then did a LOT of research into that online...after that I ordered the book and read it. And decided it was the one for me. I LOVE to cook and it lets you be creative if you want to, or you can just follow recipes online or from the books etc.

The main reason I chose SB is that it will prevent me from getting diabetes...one of the many things that killed my Daddy. It is a very healthy way to eat and is not a stupid "fad" diet. It is something I can very easily live with the rest of my life. My husband (who is a stick!) has not complained once about what we eat now and loves it as much as I do. He had a lot of problems with indigestion and so did I. Neither of us does anymore...and we have tons of garlic, onions, seasoning in our food...we don't go hungry and I have not once felt deprived...
Like I said..very personal decision, but my research led me in the right direction...for me.

[LindaD]

Hi:

I post on the 50+ Golden Girls link. The ladies are very supportive there as well as other links at 3FC. Sorry about your husband leaving after 22 years of marriage. Try to be strong.... it will get easier each day.

My husband was having an affair when I asked him to leave 3 years ago. We were married 17 years. Because I found out about several affairs he had a year before I asked him to leave, I had already lost all feelings for him by the time he left. It was difficult for a few weeks and then one morning I woke up, sat on the edge of the bed and yelled 'Hallelujah'!!! From that day on I've felt as if a weight has been lifted off my shoulders. I don't have family in CA but I do have some very good friends that support me. I've learned to enjoy life and to be happy. So, I wish you all the best.

I gained a lot of weight after the divorce and decided that I was changing my life by eating healthy and exercising 6 days a week. You have to find an eating plan you can live with even after you lose the weight. They say taking the weight off is only the beginning. Keeping it off is the hardest part because you don't get the motivation by seeing the weight loss.

I too have just about every diet book on the market. It was hard to find the one I liked and felt I could stick with because I'm such a picky eater and don't have the time to cook. Finally, I decided I would eat healthy and exercise. I eat similar to the Abs Diet. I don't have to count calories, points, carbs, etc.

Good luck and come visit us at Golden Girls.

[bethel]

Welcome, bkstitch!

I'm 53 and have been changing my lifestyle since last September. I refuse to call it a "diet" because it's so much more than that. The tools I'm using to help me make changes are Weight Watchers (I like tracking things), this forum (a WONDERFUL place for support and advice) and "moving more" (i.e., working out - walking, DVD workouts, some free weights - nothing fancy).

I have been blessed with a supportive husband, who encourages me and reminds me that what's important is to take things one day at a time, that little changes add up to big changes, and that the direction I'm heading is more important than the speed at which I get there.

Again, welcome to this wonderfully supportive community - hope to hear more from you!