300+ And Ready To Try Again...#796
 

WELCOME !!!

We are a group of individuals who weigh or have weighed 300+, or near there. This group was formed to provide a place for others like us to find support and hope. We are aware of the distinct problems that come with weighing over 300 lbs.

We want to invite everyone to join us in our journey.
We share laughter and tears.
We share what works for us and what doesn't.
We often use a "Topic of the Day" for discussion.

Motivational Monday
Tuesday Tips
Wednesday Wish List .. and What you are doing to obtain it.
Thankful Thursday
FUN Friday ... don't wait until you lose your weight.
Sit-up Saturdays - any physical activity
Share your Success Sunday

These are not required topics ...just ideas to share. We often find them very helpful. We also share heartaches and fears ... joys and celebrations.

We have several extra threads going on simutaneously such as Monthly Challenges, Weekly Weigh-ins, Recipes, Bios, and more. Please feel free to check them all out.

We have found this thread to be more than just a support group...
we have found it to become a home. We invite you to join us.

WELCOME!

I know you'll all agree that we are really thankful for the free services here at 3FC. The sisters offer all of this support and information with no charges to us. There are a couple of ways though that we can help out.

If you are thinking about buying anything at Amazon, why not help out 3FC at the same time? You can do this by clicking on the button for Amazon on any page in the forum, or by clicking on the button on the main 3FC page at www.3fatchicks.com . A portion of your purchase price will be given to 3FC by Amazon. It doesn't increase your price at all, but it does help out 3FC. You can use any of the Amazon.com links that you see on the site in order to help contribute to the site.

Also, BTW, in case you didn't know it, you can view the message boards "ad free" for a minimal charge. I think it's like $15 for 6 months. A very small investment to be rid of the annoying ads and make your pages load quicker.

There have been some concerns expressed by the powers that be about copyright infringement. So please, if you are directly quoting someone else or printing an article in whole or in part, please give credit where credit is due!!!!

:p :wel3fc: everyone who is new. So sorry that I forgot names but I started a new thread and forgot to look so... Welcome to you all. Please share with us as often as you like. We love to encourage each other.

Sharon: I am so sorry that you experienced that stuff at the Dr. It is scary and uncomfortable enough to go to the Dr. without all that other crap in the way. So sorry. I actually had an appointment one time for a CT scan and walking down the passage towards the CT area at the hospital the tech turned to me and said, "what are you about 500 pounds or so". At the time I was around that and I was so taken aback by his blunt question and that he did it in front of other people. It just knocked me for a loop and I answered him yes and he stopped and said, well you are too big for our table. You'd never fit into the CT scan. I was mortified. I was so ashamed and embarassed etc. I am actually glad that you brought that up what happend to you the other day. Granted it wasn't what happend to me but it was along the same lines and I am going to use this to help kick myself into higher gear to get healthy. You use what happened to you too if you can to just keep exercising. :hug: I absolutely mean all of that in a positive and good way. The world is so mean and insensitive and maybe once we get healthier and to a size where they will listen to us we can help other people who are going through the same thing. ;) Also, thank you so much for keeping us up to date on Ammi. Please tell her she is very missed here.

Elmay: sounds like you are going to have your hands full this Christmas. Nothing like jumping in with both feet! :hot: Have a great time with all the kids and Christmas! :tree:

Julee and Jillybean: you two ladies are doing so well. Don't let a little time of doing less than you want to, to bring you down. I know that you are concerned and that is wonderful but enjoy yourselves and don't be too harsh on yourselves. Jillybean, have fun with you family and friends on your trip!

Catherine: I was talking about you tonight in the swim class. It is so funny. I have never met you in person but I feel like I know you so well. I even refered to you as, "a friend of mine". I was speaking well of you and how you are such an inspiration to me. A lady in the class was telling me that I should really consider gastric bypass surgery and that is how you came up. Thank you again my dear for being such an inspiration. I totally look forward to the day I can look back to the four hundreds and say goodbye forever. About your rings and gowns, how exciting. I hope you take pictures so we can almost be there with you. I know that your love will look at you exactly how you desire him to on your special day.

Blessings to you all,
Dogpal

Hi
 

Catherine ~ You will get THAT look from him when he sees you in your gown. I sew, but I can't imagine making a wedding gown (so much work). I guess if you look at it they way you look at losing weight, you should take it a little bit at a time and you will see progress.

Dogpal ~ Isn't it amazing how some people think "the surgery" is the cure? During the few months I went to Overeaters Anonymous, there was a woman there who was back for help after her second gastric bypass surgery. She was balling her eyes out because she couldn't stop eating and they told her she would die (she was back up to 350 at that point). It isn't worth it! I'm glad you told that teacher that people CAN lose weight without the surgery and told them about Catherine.

I also am somewhat out of control. It doesn't take much. I've been on program for two days, but God yesterday was so bad (I was craving Taco Bell desperately ~ the guy who sits next to me at work was eating it). I stayed on track though. It's so hard sometimes, but I thought about all of you and how well you have done and YOU GUYS kept me on track. THANK YOU!

I no longer have people telling me that I should have bypass surgery, I get people asking me if I had it already. I look them straight in the eye and say, "I did enough damage to my body over the years without rearranging my internal plumbing too." I have real concerns about how people are going to be faring 10 years from now, especially teenagers who are having it done. I don't judge people who feel like they need to do it, it just isn't for me. I told myself that one 600 pound person has to do it without surgery just to prove it can be done. I'm not going through this just for me, I doing it for that one person, who is lying in a bed somewhere who has given up hope. I've been there, and don't want anyone else to suffer that anguish alone. Somehow thinking that I am on a mission, keeps me focused. I keep teasing Austin that when I get to my goal weight, and finish my book, that I’m going to drag him on Oprah. I think he is hoping that she will be off the air by then.

I completely agree about the surgery (and about Catherine being an AMAZING inspiration!). I had co-workers at my last job who had the surgery, and one kept trying to convince me to get it, too. I would watch her (with her multiple pounds of loose skin and extremely thinning hair) take fistfulls of nutritional supplements at every meal. She just recently (in the spring) had to have an entire lower body lift to remove all the exces skin from her legs, hips, and waist. I had to have surgery once to remove a 10-inch ovarian cyst (they couldn't do it laproscopically, so they sliced from my belly button down!), and I will never again do something like that to my body voluntarily!

And, so, here we are, doing it the hard way, but (I believe) the smart way :^:

Less than 12 more hours of work (tomorrow and the rest of today) before I am officially on my Christmas vacation (but who's counting ;) )!

I love how we are ALL an inspiration to each other, at one point in time or another. At least, that's how I see it. I hear about Catherine, or Julee or Jill or dogpal or Valerie or Ammi or elmay or anyone else talk about their struggles, their successes, and I know there are other people LIKE ME out there who get what this is all about. Tasha posted about the Taco Bell guy and how she resisted and I think YEAH! I can do that too. Now maybe we don't all resist all the time, but think about how many success stories we hear every week.

And the "failures". We post those too. Reading about those is actually helpful too, because it is teaching me how to rework my "failures" into learning experiences. So when I DO eat too much I have something other than guilt and shame to fall back on.

You are ALL an inspiration to me. Thanks for sharing your stories.

You guys rock. Thank you for reminding me why I don't want the surgery. I guess I am freaking out a bit because I am going to see my sister in law who was my size in September, had the surgery in October and has now lost over 90 pounds. I just feel like it would be so much quicker. I know I don't have permission from God about doing it. I have talked it over with Him and He puts in my heart pretty much what Catherine said. There will be one person who needs to know that you can do this without surgery. I want to be helpful to other people. It is just such a struggle at times that I feel overwhelmed. Then I tell you all how I am feeling and bam! You guys help me overcome those feelings. Thank you so much. You are such a blessing to me. I think this is one of the best Christmas gifts I could have is to receive friends like you all!

Blessings,
Dogpal

Hi Everyone~~:wave:

Sorry it's been so long since I've posted, but my life is one big roller coaster ride right now. :( I just wanted to say congratulations to everyone who's losing--I'm so happy for you all. I think that I've hit my first plateau--I've been going up and down with the same 4-5 lbs. for almost 2 weeks now. So on some days it says that I had reached my goal weight and then on others I still have to lose a few lbs. It's very frustrating. :p

I agree with all of you about the gastric bypass surgery. My sister in laws 2 sisters had it and I want my nieces and nephews to see that you can lose a lot of weight without choosing the surgery. I think that we'll see a lot more surgeries in this quick fix society of ours though. The surgery is nice--I guess--but it doesn't fix the problem that causes you to overeat in the first place. Tasha's story of that woman who's over 350 after having the surgery--that's a prime example. That poor lady. She must feel like such a failure. :(

Well, I have to go--this was just a "drive by" post to say hi and thanks for your inspiration!

Talk to you all later.

Vicki

Here I am back again, I kind of lost track of you all for awhile there. I wanted to share that I have reached my 10% off goal and my christmas goal as well! I am now going to be working hard to get down to 299 by April 1st.

I hope you are all doing well, I am going to put this in subscribed so I don't lose it again!

Hi Everyone!

You all brought tears to my eyes. The best support system that you can find are within these posts. When I think of giving up, all I have to do is come here and you all pick me up and dust me off and help me realize that we are all in this together. Inspiration is key to our success.

For those of you that are new, welcome. You will enjoy coming here and we will all be there to share your joys and troubles :)

Brenda :wave:

Sounds like it's time for a group hug!!:grouphug:

Dogpal-I had to take a minute to remind you that this will overwhelm anyone if they think about the whole thing. I've been doing this for 49 months. I have at least that long left to go. I can't think about anything except today. I worry about just losing one pound a week. I can lose one pound. I've probably lost a ton over the years. I tell people that the diet I am on is the simplest one in the world. Just eat less and exercise more. Very simple, but not easy. We are surrounded by sabotagers and catty skinny chicks, well meaning relatives who always say, “you have such a pretty face, if you’d just lose weight,” and our own reflections in the mirror. I have not lost 268 pounds. I have lost 1 pound 268 times. I don’t have over a hundred left to lose. I only have one pound to lose. When I lose that pound, I will worry about the next one. In my mind the Holidays are so hard, so emotional, that we need to simply breathe, and endure. I will pray that your holidays are uneventful but satisfying. For everyone I wish that they receive enough. I am learning to be satisfied with just enough, and not more.

Thanks for those words, Catherine!

Simple, but not easy.

How insanely true.

I probably can't count the number of ties on all my fingers and toes that I have had someone tell me that if I want to lose weight, I should just eat less (sometimes having used poorer choices of words, but that's been the general idea). If only "they" knew how difficult it really is to "just eat less." I have faced many ignorant people both in person and online who just assume that anyone with a weight problem simply stuffs their face full of candy, cakes, and cookies all day long, and that if they would stop doing that, they would be a normal weight. *sigh* if only that were true...I can live without candy, cakes, and cookies much easier than I can watch every calorie of every morsel that comes in contact with my mouth :dizzy:

This is the BEST group ever! You are each such gems.

I am worried about what the gastric bypass surgery will do to people down the road too. I am fat because I love to eat. Food is emotional and inspirational. That is why the holidays are hard, food is the centerpiece and we tear ourselves up over what we can and can't have. At least we have an option, we can train ourselves to eat healthy and not beat ourselves up for having pie AND have less fat. People who have done gastric bypass will NEVER enjoy a normal meal with their families again and most of them never dealt with the issues that got them there.

I have had about 15 ladies at my office get the gastric bypass, 1 of them died and the others are alive. They are thinner now. Several look MUCH older. Many are pale with thin hair. None are the picture of health to me. Several people have had the lap band too. Those people lost it slower and worked out and look healthy, but somehow, it doesn't seem like they "earned" it.

I agree with Catherine. Each pound is the focus. I get on the scale everyday and, although I have lost 111 pounds, I am upset at any fluctuation up. I want to see my most recent obstacle gone!

"Several people have had the lap band too. Those people lost it slower and worked out and look healthy, but somehow, it doesn't seem like they "earned" it."

My advice to you, and to others who feel as though they cheated to lose the weight, is to spend a few minutes on the WLS part of the forum. I have, because lately I've had to consider having WLS. I just have to say that those people work just as hard, if not harder, to keep off the weight. They still have to watch what they eat, and if they're doing things the right way, they exercise just as much, and worry just as much as we do.

I agree WLS isn't for everyone, and I'm hoping to avoid it if at all possible. But, if the time comes where it's a last resort option, I will hold my head up high and I will accept it and work my butt off to make it effective, and to live a healthier life.

Hi everyone :wave:

I had something else to add about the surgery. One of the ladies needed it--she couldn't lose the weight no matter how hard she tried. And she's eating healthy and she can exercise now and it's been good for her all around--her self esteem has risen, she's been able to do more things with her family, etc. She is so grateful that she can now live life more normally.

The other lady who had it used it as a "quick fix" method to weight loss. She had been losing weight and exercising when her sister had the surgery. She saw how quickly her sister lost weight and she decided that she wanted to lose it that fast too. So she stopped paying attention to her food and exercise so that she would gain all of her weight back and be eligible for the surgery. And now she actually has the NERVE to say things to my sister in law (SIL) about what she's eating. My SIL has been a size 16 at the most and she's been consistently a 12-14 for several years now and her sister who chose the EASY WAY out has no right to say anything to her about what my SIL chooses to eat! Those are the people Brandnewme--who I think we're all talking about when we say that it doesn't seem like they earned it. At least those are the people I'm talking about. You do not fall into that category. You are working hard to lose weight and if you need the surgery--that's okay! At least you know that you didn't just do it because it was the easy way. ((((Hugs))))

I myself wouldn't elect to have that surgery. I'm too afraid of it. :) Now that's not saying that I wouldn't have a few nips and tucks when I FINALLY get down to my goal weight. After all, a girl has to be logical--when you have a belly that hangs what are the odds of it becoming flat and not hanging after years of being a slug? ;) (Talking about myself here :p ) Seriously--does anyone know?

Well, I'll check in later. I have to go buy dog food--I ended up not going yesterday--and I have to wrap some presents. In addition to my own wrapping I've taken on the task of wrapping the presents my mother bought for my sisters and brothers families. I like wrapping and I usually do a nice job of it. :)

I hope that you all have a great day! :)

Vicki

Before I started hanging out here at 3fc I was fairly anti-wls. I have spent some time reading on the wls board here, and it has been very enlightening. The decision to have wls is not generally one made lightly, and I think for some people who have health issues, it can be more difficult to lose weight without surgical intervention. That is, for some people, it IS the only option.

But there are people who apparently DO see it as an "easy out" (perhaps fewer of those on 3fc), and there are doctors who will perform the surgery on patients without perhaps trying other options.

A few weeks ago I posted a link to a blog by a doctor who basically confessed that he believes the morbidly obese present a "challenge" he's not very good at dealing with. In part 2 of this discussion he says: "[I] generally try to consider a surgical approach in these patients, as I believe that the probability of weight loss success in these patients is otherwise incredibly low." (http://medrants.com/archives/2003/09...rbid-obesity/). His first entry is here: http://medrants.com/archives/2003/09/24/

Weight loss IS difficult. And may be especially so for those of us who are morbidly obese. But if the medical community doesn't believe people can do it, then perhaps people are being shunted to surgery before other options really have been fully explored. The mind is a powerful force, and believing something is or is not possible makes it more likely to be so! (research on self-fulfilling prophecies baacks me up on that claim).

I guess the point I'd like to make is that WE may be at the forefront of a movement that may be able to help convince the medical community, as well as other obese people, that even the morbidly obese can lose weight (and keep it off) with diet and exercise. At least some of them. I am NOT trying to denigrate people who choose WLS, not at all. I am trying to be critical of a society that looks for quick fixes (which many believe WLS to be) and of a system that doesn't believe that weight loss for the morbidly obese is possible without surgery. I want to prove them wrong.

I'd LOVE to hear further discussion on the topic!

I think the reason I feel they haven't "earned" it as much as those without WLS is that they are FORCED to have to watch what they eat or they will actually have physical repercussions. Those without WLS have to face the mental, intellectual, and emotional issues connected to their overeating or other issues with food, whereas after WLS, it's simply (well, not "simply," but you know what I mean), "if I eat that, I'll get sick." It's a matter of not getting sick rather than exploring their reasons for eating in the first place, I guess. Does that make sense? I mean, I could hire a big, strong guy to come punch me in the stomach every time I eat too much or eat something with too much fat in it or whatever, and I'd have the same results. Instead of fixing my issues with food, I'd just basically be living in fear of physical discomfort, and I don't think that's really the best solution. This is especially why I think so many people even GAIN the weight back years after surgery--they never faced their root problems, and once the stomach has regrown, you can still eat as much as before, so you need to face your issues in oder to have long-term success. Again, all my own opinion.

HOWEVER, for those with actual medical problems or who have TRULY tried losing weight sensibly and simply cannot (not just those without willpower, strength, or desire, but those who have actually HONESTLY stuck to a plan 100% and still could not lose for some reason), I think it is an excellent option. I hope that all makes sense without me sounding b!tchy :dizzy:

HI LADIES - I'm back to haunt you, at least a bit for a little while!!!

My 2-cents on the meds & WLS: I think in general people who are overweight are considered to have character flaws and weaknesses rather than health issues. Doctors are VERY happy to treat any illness - diabetes, gall stones, high blood pressure, you name it - with any surgery or meds that will A) make them a profit and B) treat the illness, and it's socially acceptable or even expected that people do so. But if you're overweight, you're just "Lazy" or whatever, and the medical profession refuses to treat it. I thought of myself that way for years, and only recently really discovered that the compulsion has a medical / chemical cause. If people choose to treat any other medical condition with meds, they don't get put down for it, and I think it should be the same with weight issues. I think addressing the problem is the most important thing, not the method. That said, YES, some people abuse it, think it's a quick fix that requires no effort, pop pills like addicts or repeatedly have themselves whacked up to achieve the end, and NO, I don't think that's right. But simply using pills or WLS in and of itself isn't wrong.

I'd have had the lap-band if I could have afforded it because it's not permanant, and it's adjustable, and at some point I would still be totally responsible for my eating & exercize. I would have hoped that it could get me to a point where I was physically able to do more exercize and control it that way. I have used meds a little in the past, and that's how I learned what "normal" feels like. No, I don't want to be addicted or dependent on them, but I don't think it's a sin to have help when it's needed. If I were going into sugar shock I'd darn sure take some insulin and who would critisize me for that?? I used pills 2 years ago for less than 2 months. I still have a bottle around here somewhere, and I wish I'd had them last week to save me from the harm I did then. I couldn't pull a load of explosives into the Wal-mart lot to go grocery shopping, nor could we stop moving while I walked away from the truck. I had my choice of a few fast food joints and my diet went to heck. I had lost 2 pounds, but I gained 3 back in a week. Would I have preferred to maintain at the expense and shame of using a "crutch" for that week??? YOUBETCHA I WOULD HAVE!

Whether people use WLS or meds, there is still a huge challange to gain & maintain good health and permanant weight loss. But certainly I agree that they carry their own health risks, and abuse is abuse of any medical procedure. Both meds and surgery can be dangerous, no denying that, but they are *** edit: are NOT*** evil in and of themselves. ( I meant to say are Not evil...) It's just a personal choice.

By the way, it's fantastic to be back here. I was wiped out by the time we got home, and I'm so glad to have my kitchen back!! Sadly, my neighborhood meat market has gone out of business and I have farther to drive to another - I hate paying more and then having to trim my chicken & meats from the grocery!!! I've been back to Curves twice this week, and will try hard to stay OP today - I promise! Thank you everyone for being here!!!

Also, I adjusted my ticker since my current weight is now my with sneakers weight at Curves (rather than my at home, burfdee suit weight) so I added a few to my starting weight to make them the same... besides, it's a small way to fluff myself up, even if I don't deserve it :)

Hello chickies!

A stimulating discussion...I had to join in.

I have considered WLS a time or two. Never seriously. Why? Because I LOVE FOOD! I can't imaging living my life never able to sit down and eat a normal meal with my friends and family. Never going out for happy hour, never going to a restaurant...why bother? If there was a magic pill that would miraculously make me thin, I'd take it. But the consequences must be weighed carefully.

I know a couple people who are considering WLS. One man weighs every bit of 500 lbs, is diabetic, and I doubt he'll ever lose weight any other way. He's had a problem getting it paid for and some other health problems that have prevented it. My best friend is the other. She recently developed diabetes. Her dr. says losing weight would likely cure it. She isn't that large, but all her wieght is in her abdomen...which everyone likely knows is worse. She's also had a mild heart attack...at 39 years old. Yet, I see her eat and it makes me crazy. Being diabetic, having a heart problem, I've never even heard her talk about weight loss other than to say she can't do it without surgery. She eats anything she wants, often "forgets" to test her blood sugar. In an effort to shock her into taking better care of herself I once asked her "What will your daughter (15 years old) do if you die." She responded, "You'll take care of her." Maybe she should have WLS - maybe it would fix her health problems and the mere fact she couldn't eat poorly anymore would get her on track. But the fact that she may have it without ever trying to lose weight with any seriousness pisses me off no end!

Brandnewme: You are NOT like my friend. If you choose WLS, I'm sure it will be because it is the best option and you will have made the attempt to lose weight and get healthy without it! Under those circumstances, you are to be commended, not condemed, for your choices.

As always, Catherine, your posts hit home. I've always said, "if I can lose the weight I'll keep it off." I've always said that. Every time I dieted and lost weight. Seeing how I started this last weight loss journey at 328, my highest ever, clearly I didn't keep it off. This is my fear. That even if I make it down to 190, it'll creep back on. I have lost 40 lbs three times in my life. I can't remember weighing less than 185...for a few weeks following removal of a 20 lbs ovarian cyst....then I gained it back in fat and was back to 205. I know this time it is a lifetime struggle. I will always have to watch what I eat. I will always have to weigh myself and go back OP if it starts creeping back on. Acknowledging this is what makes this time different for me than from all the other times I've decided to lose weight.

The other thing you said, "I will pray that your holidays are uneventful but satisfying. For everyone I wish that they receive enough. I am learning to be satisfied with just enough, and not more." also rings so true for me. Perhaps it is a function of being older, but I have learned something over the years...excitement is overrated. The world today always seems to demand "something more". People want more than they have and they want it NOW. People want their lives to be eventful and exciting and interesting and perfect. Nothing wrong with that...but I feel, especially as it comes to this journey of weight loss, that a person must learn to be happy with "just enough". They need to learn that "just enough" is perfect. I think that's the key to my ability to lose this time around. My life is comfortable. I am content...with my job, with my marriage, with my life.

So...my Holiday wish to you all is...may your life be filled with contentment and peace. :D

If I don't post again before the weekend...Happy Hanukah Julee :han: and Merry Christmas to everyone else! :tree:

I'm feeling the same way -- and as I'm getting ready to turn 40 might also be considered "older". I think that wanting food NOW has been part of my problem in the past and that there's something to be said for "just enough". There will be times when having something special is the right thing to do, but I think it's got to be rare for me to succeed!

I was reading a thread on the main support board with people talking about what holiday goodies they are eating secretly. I haven't YET eaten any, because I haven't been around any (no parties and no visits and no officemates bringing in food)! [does that get a happy smilie or a sad smilie?!] And I'm okay with that. Now, when I am confronted with them, I hope to perhaps at most have a taste.

Every other time when I lost weight I battled with myself much more over what I should and shouldn't have. This time around I am much less likely to indulge, but also less likely to beat myself up when I do.

Great posts, everyone!

Well this surgery thing, I considered a lapband but at £6,000 it would total our savings. I would never have a permanent surgery, but I expect to have some (lots?) of lose skin removed at some point in the future.:o Though it seems safer to lose it naturally rather than have an op. with all of those other risks involved, clots, infection, bad/ugly scars, lumps of scar tissue, DEATH from anaesthesia (sp?) we all get the picture.:eek:

Dolphin girl, I laughed at you SLUG remark, my hubby calls me a lame slug when I'm feeling ill or low. I get him back for it tenfold though!!!!:lol:

hope you are all ok, or getting there,
bye,
sharon.:hug:

I did want to say something about loose skin. That is a creeping fear in the back of all of our minds. I have lost weight from the top down. Right now I am basically a tight 5XL from the waist down and between a 1-2XL on top. My top half has tightened up pretty well, but I’ve been worried about my bottom half. I am noticing though that it is starting to tighten some. I just try to remember what I read on this trainer’s web site. Pinch the back of your hand. That is how thick skin is. What I have hanging on my legs, lower abdomen and under arms isn’t loose skin. It is honeycombed fat that has lost its infrastructure. I am still convinced that loose skin is about % of body fat. I remember seeing pictures of POW camp and holocaust camp survivors. Their skin was tightly stretched across them. Some of those guys were older and had been overweight too in the beginning. I’m sure they lost weight pretty fast, but you see no hanging skin. Every show that I have watched on people having skin surgery, they always do some liposuction along with it. If you are done losing weight, lipo wouldn’t be necessary. So, I am remaining hopeful on that front. I often say that I feel like I am some kind of strange science experiment at this point. I had my gallbladder removed in 1981, and the old surgery left a scar about 6 inches long right under my ribs on the right side. That scar is now 4-5” lower than it used to be and slightly more towards the middle of my stomach. Talk about weird when I realized that. It even freaked my doctor out. I’m just hoping I don’t have to have my engagement ring sized down again before the wedding. Speaking of which, I’ve got to get back to sewing this gown thing.

As for me...
 

This is who I am:

I started gaining weight when I began menstruating at age 11, even though I was extremely active and athletic. I have polycystic ovary syndrome and my hormones have always been screwed up and always will be (plus I'm glucose intolerant). I have accepted the fact that I will probably NEVER be "thin," "skinny," or whatever you want to call it ("normal").

I CAN and DO:

Exercise ~ it's good for my heart, lungs, etc.

Watch what I eat ~ it keeps me from getting bigger, even if I don't see myself getting smaller. Plus it prevents a number of diseases (like clogging up my arteries).

I do all these things to have a good quality of life. I do them so I can walk and still be active.

AND...

I am doing everything humanly possible to be healthy WITHIN MY POWER.

I would not have the surgery and I wouldn't expect another human being on this Earth to carve their body for ME (like people criticize and condemn us for being overweight). There have been instances where I have almost let these people with their criticisms make me throw up my food or be compulsive about it (almost eating disorder level). They are not worth it. I WILL NOT abuse myself for them!

We all kick butt because we KEEP COMING BACK. Even if I fall off the wagon, I can come here and you guys (without knowing it) put me right back on it. We're not perfect and neither are the skinny people. But we do kick butt!

I soooo needed to hear all of your comments. I've been kicking myself about not seeing great strides and huge losses. BUT I do a lot every day and so do you!!! We need to remember that guys! Look at all of the great things we are doing and the little hurdles we are jumping! It's like Catherine said, she didn't lose 268 pounds, she lost one pound 268 times! I can walk better than I did a year ago. I can breathe better. I am smaller (no matter how much smaller). I probably take better care of myself and my health and have more body awareness than most thin people do.

We are all making great strides that do not always relate to the scale! Remember that when the needle on the scale doesn't move or someone else is losing faster than you!

Everyone, give yourselves a pat on the back!!! :D You rock!

Like many of you, I considered WLS. I really thought it was my only option to lose weight and keep it off. However, the 1% mortality rate scared me quite a bit. There are a lot of other negatives as well. My insurance wouldn't pay for it, and I don't have a ton of spare cash lying around. Not being able to eat normally (forever? for a long time?) is a negative as well.

When my dad had his triple bypass this summer, I decided to try something I hadn't before -- go get help from a trainer at a gym. That has worked quite well for the exercise part. It has worked pretty well for the eating part except these past few days when I've struggled, but I am getting back OP. I knew enough about myself to know that it's important for me to be accountable to some one other than family/friend and that while I am well-read, I don't know everything, and sometimes I need some outside expertise.

I still am convinced that I can lose this weight and keep it off and be healthy and active without WLS, and I'm really glad for that. Thanks, Catherine, for the focus on "a day at a time" -- that's very helpful to keep in mind.

Wow guys, what a great bunch of conversation going on. Tashabella, thank you for bringing up that you are better then last year at this time. I will also dwell on that.

I weighed 505 pounds this time last year. I lost 8 pounds by the time I started 3fc. So that is better. I can swim for a long period of time now. If I have to walk far, I can. I feel hopeful now instead of so depressed I can't get out of bed. Largely in part due to you wonderful ladies.


Good to see you back Dolphingirl, Shari and Valerie!

Catherine: Thank you for pointing out to loose 1 pound at a time. It is something I will try to do without stressing about the other billion I have to go. Just the one. Thank you

Blessings to you all,
Dogpal

This is a great conversation. I personally am not for WLS for myself. I thought about it briefly but then I realized that my fat is simply a symptom of other things and until I dealt with those things then I'd probably have the surgery and then gain it right back. As I am losing weight, I'm not just thinking about the food but the emotions that go along with my eating. For me, while I'm at home, I'm fine so long as I have the right stuff in the house. But when I go out, I always wind up eating more than I plan to. So I am learning about myself that in social situations I overeat. I haven't figured out why yet but it's a new awareness that I'm learning from.

But back to WLS, I definitely feel that most people use it as a quick fix and don't really look at the risks of the surgery and whether they are really and truly willing to eat baby size portions of food for the rest of their life. They don't think about the loose skin and the thinning hair. It's not all lollipops and roses but I totally understand that some really do need the surgery.

On another note, Catherine, I must admit, when I saw your starting weight and where you are now I automatically assumed that you must have had WLS. You are a true inspiration to lose the weight on your own. I can't wait to see you on Oprah.

Hi all, I too thought about surgery but when I thought about only eating a tablespoon of food at a meal I knew that would be too restrictive. I have a real problem with denial, if I am denied something I will crave it until I could go insane from wanting it.

So I did something a little different this time around, along with joining WW again I started doing some research into health. I have been reading everything I can get my hands on about how our bodies metabolize food and what exactly fat in our bodies does. I always thought it was inert and did nothing but it is a real living working organ in our bodies and it is amazing to discover how our bodies work.

I have chosen some information that I was able to verify through other sources from books like the Perricone Weight Loss program and Flush the Fat along with several other well known weight loss programs and I decided to try adding good fats back into my diet and have removed all refined sugars and flours. I also take the juice of 1/2 a lemon with 8 ounces of hot water before breakfast in the morning.

I have been amazed at the results from this, I have energy to spare, I am happy all the time, I feel so good and my skin is looking great, I have terrible excema and regardless of how much lotion I use my skin crackes and bleeds and looks like a dry lakebed. But since starting these supplements I have almost entirely regained my skin back, it is soft and supple and it doesn't crack.

Another benefit that has just blown me away is that I have been losing weight in my middle, the last time I lost 75 pounds ( and every other time before that) I never lost a pant size. I have lost 39 pounds and 3 pant sizes so far. This is what really proves to me that it is important to add good fats into our day.

I don't recommend anyones program and in fact I only follow WW as a program but after reading the information out there and taking from it the things that made sense to me and that I was able to verify through other sources online I would suggest that anyone who has a hard time with cravings and hunger and stalled weight loss might want to try it.

These are the books I got the most and for me the best information from:

Eat Fat, Lose Weight by Ann Louise Gittleman ( good info)
Fat Flush Plan by Ann Louise Gittleman ( a little much but some good ideas)
Fit or Fat by Covert Bailey (very sensible stuff here)
Eating for Life by Bill Phillips (some very good Recipes)
The Perricone Weight Loss Diet by Nicholas Perricone ( good info on supplements)

I incorporated allmost all of the supplements suggested by Perricone as well as the fats and lemon juice.

I don't know if any of you have tried any of these diets but it is worth reading about them to get the good information from them. Some of them have a few ideas that are a little out there for me but the information that is consistant and verifiable is what I have used and have benefited from. If I can continue to carry on like this with a 2.5-3 pound loss every week I will be happy.

If I can continue to carry on like this with a 2.5-3 pound loss every week I will be happy.

Sheri...your progress and your commitment and dilligence are amazing. I'm sure that you feel great about the research you have done and that you feel very empowered...unlike a lot of people who become slaves to a program with no flexibility. Just be aware that at a certain point, your weight loss will slow down and there will be plateaus. Be happy then too...not only in the weeks that you have losses. Even if you have a gain somewhere along the line...it's not permanent if you're sticking to your plan. I have been struggling with this the last few weeks but each week I have to remind myself that I'm way better off than I was and that now that I have the tools to make it happen that I can do it...even if it's not at the rate I had hoped all the time. Every loss, no matter how small adds up. It's hard for us who are starting from a much higher weight than other people to be content with a slower pace or less weight coming off...but we have to be content some days with our best efforts even if the scale doesn't agree. I have't lost a pound since before Thanksgiving, but I did get into 2 pairs of size XL pants at Lerner the other night...and they are actually a little big on me!

My WW leader keeps reminding us that even if we only lose .5 each week..that's still 26 lbs in a year...which again can make someone starting at 180 a happy girl, but to us doesn't seem like much.

Keep up your amazing progress and keep letting us know about what you are doing!

Wow! This conversation is just FLYING! I so appreciate hearing all these comments... one theme that keeps coming back, from Catherine, to Tashabella, Julee, to, elmay to dogpal.. wow, a lot probably more... is that we are working to be better off now than we were before. I had one of those "click" moments this summer before I started this, when I said to myself that basically I wanted to be healthier in 10 years than I am right now. I want to be healthier, to feel and move better. Implicit in that thought is that this is not just something for now. THIS IS FOR LIFE. The ups and the downs, the regular days and the holidays... we get to figure out how to live and be more healthy. But it will take baby steps (as Catherine says, I've lost 1 pound 50 times. I've walked 1 mile countless times, etc.)

And I really again just want to think everyone here for being MY inspiration. I only hope to return the favor!

Has anyone tried "The Biggest Loser" workout? I just got it in the mail today and will let you know.

wyllenn, you are such an inspiration! You all are! Thank you thank you. We ARE successful! Our baby goals are set everyday and we find time to share with each other and nudge each other along the path.

I feel so much better than I did last year and my resolution for next year is to reflect with the same positive thoughts (and to cut my hair).

I haven't heard of the Biggest Loser diet. Then again, I've never even seen the show...I don't watch much tv.

Hi girls!

You all have been chatty today! Thats wonderful! Reading them are so empowering!

I thought of WLS a few years ago. Even went to my doctor to talk to him about it. If your are within a certain range of obesity, medicare I believe will cover the expense in Canada. I wanted more information about it and I can remember what he said very clearly and have thought about it many times over the years. He turned to me, told me to ask myself one question and to take a few weeks to think about it. He asked me " Have you ~really~ tried?" Over the next few weeks, few months, and now years I remembered what he said and I couldn't answer yes. Even now, I think " No. Even with all that I am doing now, which has been the most serious attempt at weight loss, I know I could be doing more. I am not ready to go to that "last resort". I consider my doctor a very smart man. He knew that I was/am stronger willed than that. Since then I have soul-searched, grown as a woman, learned that I am not alone, and read more information that most. I thank him for that.

I was in the lunch room today when a collegue of mine came up to me to wish me a happy holidays before he left for vacation. Now, over the past few months I had told him of my weight loss journey and he himself has always battled as well. I have not seen him in over a month but he instantly told me how great I was looking and really asked how I was doing emotionally. I don't know if I looked that bad :) but he spoke of how he felt during his journey (he is now almost at his "ideal" weight after losing 85lbs) and how if the scale wasn't always in his favour, some days he would look in the mirror and tell himself how ugly and miserable he looked etc. That was really something for me to think about. Not that it happens often but I think we all feel that way some days when you get down but it was really something when this was a man (raising 3 children on his own) saying this to me. Sometimes we find inspiration and motivation in the strangest places. He may just be the person who gets me through the holidays :)

Is any one else feeling... deprived? Sometimes I want to throw a temper tantrum and stomp my feet because I feel like I am not "like everyone else". I see people at work in the cafeteria day after day eating the things that I want to be able to eat. I LIKE burgers. I LOVE french fries. I also know that I have to exercise my a** off for something like 12 hours to be able to stop and enjoy one. Anyone have any ideas???

Well I think I will go and change the laundry and scrub the toilet. That is where I would love to toss this diet of mine for the next few weeks. I know that I won't because I have worked too darn hard to get where I am. Almost 25% lost. 75% more weight to lose! That is an achievement worth keeping!

Night
Brenda :wave:

Rebecca -- Well, you are inspiring too! Over 100 pounds lost! There are days I think I will get there too.

Brenda -- Oh yes, there are lots of times lately when I have wanted to chuck it all and just eat whatever. Like today. And yesterday. And Monday... But I know a lot of it's coming from Stress, and frankly, I am sick and tired of Stress telling me when to eat!! Frankly, I'm thinking Stress doesn't have my best interests at heart. So, I tell Stress to go jump off a cliff.

Well, I wish I could, anyway.

I feel like I'm kind of flirting with a Binge. You know, it looks good from a distance. And so I move closer... rearrange my plan for the day to have something yummy I want... but then I realize as I get close that the Binge looks best from far away...

Okay, this must be my post workout endorphins acting up.

I tend to get VERY discouraged, and then I'll stop dieting for a while. It's getting me motivated to exercise that's the biggest challenge. And I know that I NEED to exercise if I'm going to be successful, it's just that's it's so dang dreary and cold out, that since I can't work out OUTSIDE, I simply don't want to do it. :(