I love how active this site is!!!
Welcome Anna! God job on your weight loss! Yes, it is slow. That is why we do so much better with support from our fellow turtles. (Sorry if I offended anyone.) What I find most motivating is seeing others who keep at it especially when it is slow. I do not feel so alone.
Betsy, you make me chuckle. You should have at least carried Toby up and down the steps with you. Did you thank him for his little gift he left behind to help you with your weightloss? Thanks for making your last statement clear. If we had not seen you on here for a few days we would assume you were doing time for showing off the goods!
Time4me, once again you have given me something to ponder. How much have I used my weight as a wall to keep others away? I too have few close friends. I am not sad about it. I've encouraged it. Hmmm? I might need some couch time for this one.
Fiona, love the ticker. Kind of a calm sea for this journey? I buy a few clothes for reward when they are needed. I have trouble rewarding myself except for with...yes, you guessed it FOOD.
Is it bed time yet?
How is everyone doing?

Let's talk about cravings. What do y'all do to deal with them? My first and always principle is to accept the craving, not fight it, and I don't ever feel bad about having it. Cravings are natural when you're on a diet. I make a strong distinction between having a craving and acting on it. I think of it as like the difference between fiction and real life: just as you can enjoy a scary movie, but not want to be scared like that in real life, you can have a craving, but not have to act on it.

99% of my cravings go away, given a little time, so the main thing to do is to find something to do, while I'm waiting for them to go away.

Things I do while waiting for a craving to pass (in no particular order, but the things I do most often are listed first):
(1) Eat something that's on my plan. I'm doing Atkins, so I can eat all the meat I want, plus cheese, green veggies, and macadamia nuts in moderation.
(2) Listen to music. Sometime I listen to CDs, but I like surprises, so I listen to the radio (Sirius-XM), Pandora.com, and other music on "shuffle." My sweetie and I gave ourselves the complete Beatles for our 35th anniversiary: there's a lot of songs, so they're great on shuffle.
(3) Look at art. Artworks are like the visual equivalent of songs. Museums are best, of course, but short of that, I look at art books and look at art online. It's fun to pick one artist I like, google them, then try to find everything they've ever done. René Magritte, for example. I also spend a lot of time looking at art, including photos, on Flickr.com, because there I can interact with the artists by picking "favorites" and making comments. Your local library probably has art books.
(4) Meditate. Don't know how to meditate? I highly recommend Mindfulness in Plain English by Bhante Gunaratama: the title doesn't really say so, but it's basically Meditation for Beginners. It's written from a mild Buddhist perspective, but I'm no Buddhist, and I find that part easy to ignore.
(5) Take a nap. Sometimes when I meditate, I fall asleep. That's fine. Sleep is always a blessing.
(6) Listen to nature sounds. You can find CDs of ocean sounds, rain, etc., at Amazon.com. Very soothing.
(7) Do my leg exercises. What I do is so easy: I lie on the couch and do leg lifts, half on my side and half on my back. Left leg on odd-numbered days, right leg on even-numbered days, so the muscles have a day to recover. I count them out in groups of twenty. At first I could only do 40, but I gradually worked up to many more. I do three sets a day, with rests in between until my breathing and heartrate come back to baseline. They've made a big difference in how I feel!
(8) Dance to the music. I like the rock-n-roll show that Jim Ladd does from 7-11 EST on Sirius-XM's Deep Tracks station. You may have an exercise or dance DVD: those are great! When I'm lazy, I just lie on the couch and dance my leg lifts or dance with my arms.
(9) Socialize. Post to 3FC or some other forum. Talk to my husband. Make a phone call. Write an email.
(10) Get outside. I haven't started walking yet, but I still like sitting on the grass, going to the park and sitting on a bench, admiring the fall leaves, spring flowers, etc.
(11) Write in my journal. I should have put this earlier on this list, because I do it a lot. I can say absolutely anything in my journal, and it's super for figuring out what the craving is really about: loneliness, neediness, anger...Writing out your thoughts & feelings is supposed to be very helpful in a weight loss program. I do mine in a paper journal, but computer files are good, too.
(12) Go "window-shopping." I do this a lot! It doesn't cost any money at all, of course. Sometimes I do it with paper catalogs or magazines: turning down the corners of pages that have things I like, or circling them with a marker, even cutting them out with scissors and collecting up all the things I "bought." But mostly I do it online: adding items to my wish list at Amazon.com (where my husband looks for things to buy me at Christmas & on my birthday), adding to my favorites list at Etsy.com. Books, CDs, DVDs. I like to window-shop for things I could conceivably wear now, like jewelry, socks (SockDreams.com), scarves, expensive full-size clothes (lots of places, but especially MakingItBig.com). I also adore ArtfulHome.com, for all kinds of gorgeous artsy stuff.
(13) Buy something for real. A T-shirt. A coffee mug. Inexpensive jewelry.
(14) Download a book. I do this a lot, too. The nice thing about Kindle and other e-books is the instant gratification. Don't have a Kindle? Put one of the plain ones (not the Fire) on your wish list—as your next mini-goal reward. They're really worth it! If you avoid the latest releases, lots of Kindle books are free or just a couple of bucks. Or go to your local used bookstore. Nothing like a new novel or a collection of short stories to distract you while the craving passes.
(15) Visualizations. Sometimes I imagine that the craving is sitting up high on a cloud, and then I watch as the cloud slowly drifts away. Other times I just visualize myself doing my favorite things—sailing, sitting on the beach, lying in a hammock in some fantasy location.
(16) Watch a movie. Duh...this should have been higher on my list. Netflix is great. Or a favorite DVD.
(17) Do something creative. If you want a new creative hobby, I highly recommend Swap-bot.com. You sign up for a swap, then get assigned a partner to whom you mail something, and somebody else gets assigned to send something to you—a great way to get nice mail! I started easy, with postcard swaps: send a postcard of your hometown, whatever. You meet people who become friends, then you mail them postcards & letters whenever you feel like it. Then you can work up to doing crafts: knitting, needlework, collage, whatever.
(18) Play a game. Another way to socialize, either online or in person. Lots of forums have games, and I hear good things about Words with Friends.
(19) Do a jigsaw puzzle. Pomegranate.com has great puzzles (cool other stuff, too): just $18-19 for 1000 beautiful pieces and hours of entertainment. Clearing off the dining room or kitchen table and covering it with a puzzle makes a serious statement that you have other interests besides food.
(20) Go for a drive. Sometimes it helps to just get out of the house and move around in space. Go to the park, or pick up a vente-size decaf at the Starbucks drive-in window, or drive around aimlessly. But of course I avoid stopping anywhere that has food!
(21) Do something kind for someone else. A friend. A family member. A stranger on 3FC who needs positive feedback. Volunteer. Giving to others is good for the soul.
(22) Chew some sugarless gum. Why not? It's oral gratification!

I'm sure there's more I haven't listed (sex! alone, or with a partner) but this posting is huge enough. Obviously a lot of the above can be done in combination: listen to the radio while driving, meditate and visualize, and so on. I tried to put in links for the websites, but 3FC kept taking them out—oh well.

So what do you do while you're waiting for a craving to drift away?

(23) Make myself coffee or tea. A definite favorite. And on the Atkins diet, you're allowed to have cream! When I'm craving something sweet, I add stevia (Sweet Drops liquid) and vanilla, and sprinkle cinnamon on top.
(24) Take a shower. I always feel better when I'm clean. Refreshed. Ready for anything.
(25) Do housework. This one belongs at the bottom of the list, but sometimes I get inspired to clean or pick up while listening to rock-n-roll.

Good morning!
Fiona, when I have cravings I try to have something on plan or come on here but more then likely I will do housework. There is always something to be put away. When I get to that spot I spy something else to put away and before I know it my ADD takes over and I forget my craving. Thanks for the list it is helpful!
Today I have broken through my 4 month resistence weight BY 3 POUNDS!!!
Jane, drink some olive oil and those stones will slide through. We miss you!
How is everyone doing?

Fiona, those are all great ideas! Many of which I do as well. It also helps me to look at motivating pictures.

Some days it feels like I'll never get to goal. It's nice to find sites where I can look at before and after of people my size that lose weight. It's hard to find though because normally they only have a few pounds to lose.

Hey all...

having a bit of a rough time with food intake lately, TOM is approaching and I usually get more hungry around that time...combined with extra time off work....

I'm calling a loss for this week of 2 pounds.... because in about 1 day my eating will regulate again.... and I was closer to losing 4 pounds this week.... so I met my body 1/2 way...

Good morning all. It is so great to read all the posts and see how active this thread has become. It definitely gives me both a lot to think about and the inspiration to keep on going.

Time4me -- Your friend sounds like a jewel, and it's a wonderful thing to realize that the friendship is to be cherished. I had a close friend like that back in my 30s, and I've never had another friendship as close since. We now live across the continent from each other, email and chat, but it's not the same as it was. In spite of the hurt, it sounds like you're moving on and know that this is a friendship to be cherished. I'm happy for you to have someone like that in your life -- especially since you're living overseas. Hope that TOM is kind to you -- I'll take losing 2 pounds each week (although I do love the 4 pound weeks as well!).

Fiona -- love your ticker and your whole outlook on life. My sister was the artistic one in the family, and she always opened my eyes to a different way of viewing things. Your cravings list was amazing. I wait 15 minutes. If it hasn't passed by then I allow myself some cheese crisps or nut thin crackers if it a salty craving and some sugar free jello if it's a sweet. The only one that I really have problems with is if I have a peanut butter craving. If it doesn't pass, I allow myself an apple with 2 tbl of PB that I warm a little in the microwave so that it's almost like a dipping sauce. What I'm trying to learn right now is that I need to measure out my cheats so they're not so catastrophic; i.e., 13 potato chips in a bowl as opposed to just throwing in the towel and sitting down with the bag. Me sitting down with a bag of potato chips is a disaster.

Ubee -- yes, showing off the goods would land me in jail......mainly because it would probably stunt children's growth from the shock of it! Congratulations on the moving on through the 4 month resistance weight by 3 pounds. Yahoo!!!!!

Watchout -- yes, posting with people who are the same size does help immensely. I always thought that I could just lose the weight by myself. While I've had many ups and downs over the last year, I know that my determination to actually do this comes from getting a lot of support on this site.

Anna -- welcome. I think losing 26 pounds in 3 months is great. It may seem like a slow pace, but you're doing really well. Keep up the great work.

Today is our last sunny day for the next 7 to 8 days, so I'm going to do a mad rush at finalizing getting the yard work done and consider it done for the year. Still lots of stuff I should be doing, but it will be there next spring. I just spent 20 minutes rather frantically searching for Toby. I finally found him sound asleep under my bed. He was completely hidden by the bed skirt. He's slowly getting the idea that he's supposed to let me know when he needs to go out. Now, if I can just convince him that more than 5 seconds is needed between signal and action. He'll get to be outside with me today while I'm working, so I know he'll love that.

Have a great day!

Still struggling to find motivation but thought I'd stop in before I feel completely like i've dissapeared off the face of the earth.

I understand about not bein' motivated, silentarctic, because I'm not really motivated, either. I've been comfortable with being a fat woman for around 25 years.

So why am I doing this project? For health reasons, pure and simple. My knees are starting to go. And I know for a fact that being this fat going into my 60s and 70s (I'm 58) is gonna cut 10 years, at least, off my lifespan. I don't want to lose those 10 years, because I've got a lot of stuff I want to do.

So I'm dieting anyway, without motivation. Instead I just feel stubborn. Something inside me clicked when my doctor recommended bariatric surgery. I said, "No way am I letting someone do that to my body!" and started my weight loss journey.

It helps a lot that I'm doing Atkins, because I'm never hungry for long. When I get hungry, I eat meat—as much as I want. It also helps that I put my big 3 compulsive-eating foods into a mental lockbox and said, "For the time being, I choose to abstain from those."

Do you have a good understanding of what you like about being fat? That's something I've found to be key: being clear on the advantages of being fat and on the disadvantages of being thinner. That allows me to weigh the pluses and minuses of all the options, and be clear on why I'm doing this.

P.S. added later... Speaking of motivation, I just ran across a really good quotation: "They say that motivation doesn't last. Well neither does bathing: that's why it's recommended daily." So true! For me motivation comes from saying to myself, every day, what's motivating me. If I go too long without writing down (here, or in my journal) or saying out loud my reasons for wanting to lose weight, my motivation evaporates. This journey is really more in your head than it is in your body. That's why I make a daily habit of "lifting the weight" of my motivation. I really hope you stick around, silentarctic, do the daily work with us.

Silent -- I so understand your lack of motivation. I have been struggling, but I feel as though I'm beginning to go through some realizations. Fiona's feedback on just toughing it out to some degree is what we all need. The realization that it's impacting my health is a big driver. If you can avoid some of the messes I'm now dealing with, that alone would provide you with some motivation. But, Fiona's question about what you like about being fat -- well, gee, nothing. If I don't like it, then why am I putting up with it. Think of something that you accomplished in your life that you never thought you could. Then figure out how you did it and try to incorporate that into your eating plan. And keep coming here. Every day. Don't worry about every day starting with still not being able to find your motivation. If I'd started posting 40 years ago when my weight issues began, maybe I wouldn't be in this mess today.

I did it. Got all the yard work done that I wanted to get finished. Now I can start on getting stuff ready for the holidays. I've also been thinking through why I'm doing the yo-yo bit, and am getting better with measuring portion sizes, only having one serving instead of taking the container to the table, etc. I've also decided that I can't give up all of the foods that I eat. But, I don't have to eat them every day and I don't have to eat them in endless quantities. So, once a week I can have something that is potentially high calorie or high carb. But, it still has to fit into that day's calorie and carb count and I need to limit it to a serving size. No more binging mindlessly. I'll keep you updated on how this works in terms of changing my bad eating habits. Hopefully by finally seeing my ticker move!

Betsy - That's a really good idea. When I was calorie counting, when I wanted it to work for me, I never deprived myself of anything. But I did follow the serving sizes, correct portion sizes, and how it fit into my calories for the day. It really can work and it did for 70 of the pounds I had initially lost.

Fiona and betsy - Sad but there are things, like I can eat what I want, thats the big one. Not a valid reason but a reason... I honestly don't lvoe being fat but I don't hate it either. On principal, I mean Some things would be a touch easier if I was a little lighter it would be a little easier on my joints to participate in hiking and step aerobics. It would be a touch easier to clothes shop. And maybe I would be a little healthier... but being healthier is such an airy fairy goal when you are depressed.

That said, I'm eating leftovers from sunday all week so it takes the decision making out of my food intake. Until I'm travelling thursday night.

Hello, I am glad I found this thread. I can relate to so many posts. For now I will not respond to individuals but I will over time.

My motivation waxes and wanes. Like others here my main focus is health. I have had some physical issues which simply remind me it would be easier to get around weighing less and being more physically fit. I worry what will happen as I age. I am 47. I do not want to be physically dependent on others if I don't need to be.

My knees are also degenerating and some day I will need surgery. I have had injuries unrelated to my weight however as I mentioned they reminded me of how difficult it can be to carry this weight around. A few years ago I broke my arm and had a heavy cast on. Just climbing stairs and getting up was painful, it jarred my arm. I found how much I used my arms to haul myself onto buses etc.

What I find most frustrating as I get older is that losing weight takes longer, it's just harder. It was easier when I was younger. And I have not yet entered menopause. I know it will be even harder then.

Again so glad I found this thread.

Another day of low-carb and staying away from my Big 3. I've decided to call it "taking a vacation" (see my sig) instead of "abstinence," because that feels a lot more relaxed and positive. It's not at all that I can't ever eat those foods: it's just that they were occupying way too much space in my head, and I need time to figure out why that was so. I don't like it when a food is so alluring to me it becomes much more than just food. Meanwhile, there are plenty of things I really like that are on my plan, things I would eat if I were naturally skinny, like smoked turkey, salmon, all kinds of cheese, cheese omelets with veggies, macadamia nuts, and cream in my coffee.

Last night while watching TV I played with my little barbells. I did biceps curls with the 10-lb weight and side arm lifts with the 4-lb one. I did as many as I could, on both sides, and it had a wonderful effect: I was sleepy afterwards and was able to go to bed and to sleep immediately. That sure beats insomnia, which I've really been having trouble with.

pluckypear— Welcome to the thread! I'll second your comment about losing weight being harder to do as one gets older. At 58, I'm really noticing the difference. I used to be able to cheat on my plan and still lose weight, but not anymore! And I'm worried about how saggy my post-menopausal skin is: everything droops a lot more than it did even just five years ago.

silentarctic— I encourage you to make a list, written down on paper, of the pro's and con's of being fat, and what you think the pro's and con's of being thin would be. If it's hard to think of very many, here's a visualization you can do: Close your eyes and imagine you're at a gathering with other people where there's a table with lots of yummy food. Imagine what clothes you're wearing, how other people are responding to you, what you do when you approach the food. Ask yourself: What do I like about this scene? What do I not like about it? Do that exercise two times: imagine yourself at your current weight, and then imagine yourself at your goal weight. I found that to be really helpful for getting it all straight in my head. It was surprising to me to discover some real disadvantages to being thin.

Melissa— Sorry to hear about your rough time! I guess there is one advantage to losing weight when post-menopausal: no more time of the month. =smile=

Betsy— That's a good idea you have about giving yourself a treat once a week. I've read that if you zig-zag around, having different amounts of calories on different days, that it keeps your metabolism from adjusting to the diet and slowing down. It's like you want to keep your body guessing. Some people zig-zag by designating one day a week when they go completely off the diet. I'm just trying to vary how much high-fat cheese I eat, since all cheese is on plan for Atkin's.

watchoutforthatcar— I know what you mean about before and after pics: they can be very motivating. I searched around on 3FC and found quite a few pics of people who did have a whole lot to lose.

Ubee— Good for you to be down 3 pounds from your resistance weight! Hoorah! Did you check out swap-bot.com as a place for getting a new hobby? It's really fun even just to do the postcard swaps...

Jane— How are you feeling these days? I hope you'll come back soon! We miss you...

Good morning!
Watchout, I understand your fear of not getting to goal. I really want to make it there. This is new for me I always just wanted to lose weight. Now I want to be healthy and trim. Have you checked out this site for pictures of people at different heights and weights? http://www.cockeyed.com/photos/bodies/heightweight.html
Time4me, good job on your loss!
Betsy, I tried your warmed peanut butter. Brillant! However, I think I like the texture and with that taken away it is less tempting. Thank you! I'm curious, what do you do during the winter when all your yard work is done? Have you thought about giving your ticker a small goal and a goal date? I always thought I would hate the pressure but I find it helpful.
Silent, I am sorry you are struggling but please keep posting. This site is the main reason I am so successful this time. It is so important for me to have suppportive people who understand what it is like to be 300+. I found The Beck Diet Solution to be very helpful. It tells you how to survive the thoughts and feelings we have. It is not about motivation, it is about commitment!
Fiona, I am glad exercising is helping you sleep. It is what I tell myself often when I don't feel like exercising. Would you mind sharing your disadvantages to being thin, other then less food?
Welcome Pluckypear, you bring up a good point about carry extra weight. Maybe on days we are struggling we should carry something that weighs 10-20 pounds around our house for a while and it may make something click in our brains.
Today my thoughts are on regain. Yesterday we were at a gathering and we saw people we had not seen for years. Many had lost weight and now regained a lot more. I used this as an opportuntiy to discuss with my husband the danger of regains and how quickly even more piles on. He is very supportive BUT, I need him to get a little more educated about eating healthy. It really reinforced my belief that maintaining at any weight is huge progress. (Thanks Kaplods!)