Hi Jilu

Hi Jilu welocme!
Well weigh day today and I have lost a pound this week. OK I was hoping for more but haven't been able to exercise at all for most of it so I guess I should be pleased! At least it is a loss and takes me officially to 5 stone/70lb lost.
Went for a slow short walk this morning with kids and dogs using one crutch and actually my knee feels better this afternoon than it has done for a week or so. I am hoping and praying that it is on the mend. Not only does the exercise help the weight loss it does wonders for the serotonin levels which really helps the old mental health.
Think I will give the badminton a miss for a while though!
Happy Sunday xxx

I'm really trying to find the strength to continue.

Recently I've had a lot of floaters in my eye so I went to get it checked because I read it could be serious. They told me my retinas are really thin, he didn't see a tear and there's not a detachment yet but there could be, and if left untreated if that happens it can cause vision loss. He told me it was rare, but now I have extremely high anxiety over it. I'm overly anxious as it is, so this has taken me over the top.

I haven't over eaten because of it...honestly, I don't think it would make me feel better. I'm just trying to focus and only worry if it gets bad...but that's easier said than done.

I don't know if this will be any comfort to you at all, but I just wanted to share my experience. I started getting floaters in my eyes in 1999. I remember the exact day it happened. That year, I developed maybe a total of 4-5. I talked with doctors galore and they said it just happens sometimes. It was the most annoying thing I'd ever experienced. I was constantly trying to blink them away and I wore shades all day everyday for a year just to try to make them go away (they seem to fade in darker light and come out in brighter light). After a year, I had to eventually stop being annoyed, suck it up, and learn to live with them because doctors told me that it's nothing you can remove. Now, 13 years later, they are still there, BUT I still have 20/20 vision. I never lost a bit of my eyesight because of the floaters. They come and go, but for the most part they stay away, and I've learned how to "blink them away" lol (or at least blink them out of my line of sight).I know everyone is different, but I just wanted to share a "brighter side" perspective.

I posted on 'Introductions", and i feel this is one of the places i should be. I am 5'3 and 315 lbs. I have been lurking for a bit and i hope to get to know all of you. this seems like a very friendly, supportive place to be.

It's definitely back to school time and all of my active friends in the area have all gone back to their respective grad schools pretty far away and intramural leagues are over.

It has definitely been a challenge to do things by myself like bike riding, etc. Should still get to enjoy some water sports over the next few weekends before it gets too chilly to ski or wakeboard without wetsuits (two live about an hour away and come home for the weekend). I'm gradually getting the husband out of his computer hidey hole to come racquetball with me now that my usual partner is gone. He has also expressed interest in getting a bike to ride with me.

I guess all and all, I'm just biding time until they lay down the ice for hockey in a couple weeks and I go relearn how to ice skate. ;>

If you can't tell, I'm pretty unmotivated about exercise unless it's a fun activity. And I definitely need some sort of activity after the switch from retail to hospital pharmacy at the beginning of the summer. I've gone from 12+ hour days on my feet to a ~70% desk job. And there is a vast difference. I didn't realize how much of an energy suck sitting at a desk can be. I try to make sure I go out on the floors a several times per day to see patients and talk with doctors/nurses and to stop feeling like I'm going to get a DVT from sitting so much.

hey y'all! Have been a bit MIA with work and the painting and whatnot. Thus far I have only finished the dining room, but have finally finished it. Furniture and books back in and rearranged. I am going to tackle the living room next and while there are more challenges with the stairs and the high ceiling, I think it will be easier. The furniture is lighter. Fewer bookcases!

car - man, it would be really tough for me to do this while rooming with someone who could eat that stuff. I have a hard time when I house sit for my parents, because they always have that food around. It just gets in my brain and I really admire your fortitude in losing weight when you have someone else's less-healthy foods in the house. Even if you lose the battle sometimes. I think that's okay, too - when it's a battle or two, you know?

Oh, and I will absolutely post some pictures when I am done! I am pleased with how it is turning out. Though now I want new furniture and carpet and so on. I need to prioritize those things and maybe make some goals for saving for them to go along with weightloss.

Oh, also! Posters in frames are fairly inexpensive, and if you go to Michael's or AC Moore, they will often have already-framed stuff for sale, often at a big discount. So you could find a few you like that liven up your living space like that. Even better, you can hang them with those Command Performance strips. They have a huge selection in the hardware section. Plus, check out their website before you go and print off coupons (or keep them on your phone?). Right now Michael's has a coupon for 50% off one regular priced item, which you can get from the Sunday paper or print from their website.

You could also buy some canvases and paint them yourself. Or cover them with interesting fabric. Or lace. Or photos or scrapbook paper, and then affix them to the wall with those strips. They are supposed to come off with no damage!

And finally - heh. Trust me, I know how stressful the stuff with your eyes can be. I have always had floaters, but years ago I developed a few fixed shadows in my vision. My ophthalmologist was asking me if I had Behcet's Disease and on and on. I had uveitis - inflammation, likely auto-immune - both anterior and posterior. It gradually cleared up; I had a whole work-up for lupus or sarcoidosis but that was all normal. But it was really, really scary at the time. And felt so immediate. I don't know how to pull back on that feeling of stress - we stress more about things that are out of your control, and this is out of your control.

But other aspects of your health are totally IN your control, and you've already taken control of them! I don't know if that will help you with the stress, but it might be a good way to subvert the negative stress into something more positive.

Jilu Nerdy Gras sounds terribly fun. I love fantasy and sci-fi, though I don't have much patience for it as fiction these days and George RR Martin is the only author I follow consistently. But I've never been to a *Con of any sort.

If you were engaging in cosplay - what did you go as?

Glad you survived the storm. That said, I personally have a great terror of racquet ball. Something about the sound they make against the walls or the immediate possibility of getting smacked back by the ball.

Rosebud - are your tomatoes still producing? We basically had a tomato dinner last night: Gazpacho, and a stir fry with shrimp, tomatoes and mushrooms, and Greek salad, which was basically 90% tomatoes. Plus a three-pepper salad that was: peppers and tomatoes. I had a bazillion peppers on my pepper plants, but my eggplants have not performed well at all. I think I need to replenish the soil, I am terrible at remembering to fertilize.

mountain walker - I am so sorry about your knee injury. That is so disappointing! but I'm glad that it is starting to feel well enough to take a bit of a walk. I imagine it is harder to deal with after your fracture - I would be afraid of any sort of repeat injury - and there is that emotional component to it too. And congrats on getting to 70 lbs lost!

TwilightWing - hello! I will go check out your introduction. Is the avatar a portrait of you? Or a portrait on which you are working? OR something else? It is pretty neat; I always wished I could paint or draw, but I have absolutely no ability there.

angieand2girls -- Thank you. Unfortunately, I can't remember the last time I've had 20/20 vision, lolol! I started wearing glasses in elementary school...hopefully it's nothing. But I'm glad to hear of someone who has experienced floaters and nothing bad has come of it.

mnem -- Honestly, sometimes it is ALL I think about...but I try to ignore it the best I can, and if I can't then I'll take ONE cookie or a couple bites and try to be satisfied with that. Doesn't always work, but sometimes it does.

Also, you're right it's totally out of my control. Either something will happen with it and I'll be fortunate enough to have it fixed or it won't...but it drives me crazy. It's been so hard for me to sleep because it's all I think about. For my sanity I scheduled an appointment Friday with a retina specialist. Hopefully, that will ease my mind if everything comes back okay. I went to an eye glass place, but I read up that sometimes it's better to go to someone that specializes in eyes and isn't just an eye glass doctor.

I dunno...but thanks for all y'alls kind words and support it means a lot.

PS - your adventurousness is inspiring. I'm terrible at so many physical things. Have always been a bit paralyzed when on skates (ice or roller, though was better at ice skating than roller skating), and I've never managed to wakeboard or waterski. Once upon a time I was decent at snow skiing, but I was always undermined by anxiety about falling, et cetera.

--

Re: the chatter about racquet ball and tennis: last night I watched the women's final at the US Open. Well, I just watched the third set, and wow was Serena amazing. It really looked like she was going to lose when Azarenka broke Serena's serve. And Serena double-faulted 3 or 4 times, but she just knuckled down and pulled through. It was such a great match and I was so happy Serena won.

Oh, yes. I think that that was really smart to do. The retinal specialist will be able to set it out for you, in a way the optician could not! Particularly since you are having so much anxiety about this right now, try to take some time to sit down and write out your questions and concerns before going to the appointment. That will help you remember them when you get there.

Also: most medical insurance does not cover eye appointments, but if the retinal specialist advises you to see an ophthalmologist (the MD rather than OD eye doctor) once per year for medical reasons, your medical insurance should cover those monitoring appointments!

mnem - I wanted to use my vision insurance when I went...but they said it was medically necessary. So, I don't know where that's going to put me when I go to the specialist, because I had to use my medical insurance. It was only 40 dollars, though. So hopefully if I do have to pay out of pocket for the specialist it won't be too much.

And thanks for the advice! There are questions I want to ask and I would forget by the time I get there. It's this Friday...so I'll start jotting some things down.

Hi Twilightwing welcome!

mnemosyne- i used to visit a site called photomania or something like that. you could do really neat things with your pics... that is a pic of me a couple years ago. i thought the drawn look looked neat as well.... its free so you should check it out sometime(if i remembered the name right lol).

Thank you for the welcome ev1. hope everyone is having a great day

TWILIGHT ~ glad to have you join us over here; it's nice to have a place where we can chat about our unique challenges.

MEM ~ that wall picture idea is a good one too. Glad you have your diningroom done; will enjoy seeing some pics for sure. YES, my tomatoes are still producing; picked 6 today, and I have about 20+ new clusters growing on it right now -- seems it has a second life now the temps are warmer again. These ones are called TUMBLING TOMS, and they just keep tumbling along ... I will likely bring it indoors at night and for good at some point to see if it continues producing into the winter; worth a try, I think. This has been my best producer so far, so I hope the nursery gets them again next year. You could make some chili sauce with some of those extra tomatoes and peppers; maybe freeze it even.

CAR ~ I hope you get the "eye" issue sorted out. I don't know what floaters are, but on occasion I have had a few moving stars (like moving lights) -- they are very small, and come & go. I wonder if it is age-related? Thank goodness, whatever it is, it is very rare and doesn't last long (don't have any now). Will ask my eye doctor the next time I have to get new glasses which won't be long now, I think.

JILU ~ sounds like you are planning for an active winter for sure. I'm with you on finding activities you enjoy to do.

ANGIE ~ thanks, I know it comforts me ...

SUMMER ~ glad that you popped by!

MOUNTAIN ~ see you can still lose weight even though you are recuping; and that's great!

Eating is going well; had leftovers for lunch today and for dinner, we had some Homemade Texas Chili that I made before and froze (have enuff for lunch tomorrow too). It will be fish or poultry for dinner tomorrow to change things up a bit (which is according to my weekly menu plan).

Have a great OP week everyone ...

car - I am thinking about you! I imagine you are having a tough week, worried about your eyes. Glad you don't have to wait much longer to get to a specialist for the answers that you need. I hope it doesn't cost too much. I don't have vision insurance, so getting things covered by my regular medical insurance is always positive for me as I need to pay for my eye appointments, but if your vision insurance is a better deal for you, maybe they can work out a way to bill it there.

Twilight - thanks for the tip, I will check that site out! I keep meaning to upload a picture or something here, but I never remember when I am at home. Though I did buy a new full-length mirror and hung it on one of my doors (of the spare bedroom), so I can take some more progress pictures. Heh, heretofore, the only full-length mirror I had in the house was hidden behind the door. Right now, I look the way I always thought I looked even at my heaviest.

Rosebud - wow, that is such an impressive harvest. I hope they keep producing indoors, though I have my doubts. The only plant I bring inside is my Rosemary. It is the only plant my cats leave alone. Everything else they shred. I have had very good luck this year with an heirloom cherry tomato. It is purple. I don't remember the name, but it has been VERY productive and has NOT succumbed to the yellow-spot disease that my other tomatoes get. I think I will make either chili or spaghetti sauce (or both?) with the tomatoes and peppers, and freeze them. I have a good technique for a roasted cherry tomato and garlic spaghetti sauce that is super easy (which is ideal for me. I like to cook but I don't love to FIDDLE with things, if that makes sense. Precision is my enemy).

Got a (small) part of the living room ceiling painted last night. Am going to work on it again tonight. Maybe if I get it done this week I will be able to finish the living room this weekend! I still have a ton of yard work to do, too. But the weather is finally lovely, warm during the day and cool at night. I think I can take down the a/c unit for the duration.

Here is an NSV for y'all: I am wearing today a jacket and tank that my mom bought me two years ago. I took one look then and knew they would not fit, so I just threw them in the back of the closet. The receipt was still stapled to the plastic cover. Anyway, tried them on a few weeks ago, and they were a bit tight but so, so close that I tucked them away, but closer to the front. Well, today they fit! They were part of a three-piece suit set she bought me. I gave the pants away to goodwill, though, because they were a bit too big when I dug it out of the closet (more too long than too BIG, but not so much in a way amenable to hemming) and I did not like the texture.

mnem -- Yeah, this week has been tough. I literally have to force myself to calm down enough to get any sleep. And it's not like they've told me I'm going blind! I just have really bad anxiety that I've never taken anything for so I think that's what makes it worse.

Friday can't come soon enough. If they say everything is fine I will have to make myself take their word for it. And stop stressing about it.

I literally feel that urge building up inside of me to binge. I keep thinking of all the stuff I could buy and stuff my face with. It drives me crazy. I'm trying really hard. I've been eating correctly, but I stopped exercising this week. I have no motivation for it...I can't even really think of anything else.

And it sounds so stupid to me. All they ever told me was to look out for signs of a more serious problem and it's made me so depressed...

My brother and I are going to see the new Resident Evil movie friday evening and hopefully that will take my mind off of it. Plus my niece's birthday Saturday which I hope I don't go overboard.

I don't know if I told y'all, but my friend's kid's birthday party was last Saturday. And I did well. I ate one piece of pizza and a small piece of cake and ice cream.

I'm really just rambling now, lolol.

Justwant2 -- I'd get it checked out. I know not everything means anything, but if any changes happen it's just best to be safe than sorry.