PinkFlamingo - I would love to swim. I'm thinking about trying it someday, but I'm so shy and scared about showing my body. EW..ya know? But seriously I think that is great! You sound like you've jumped in and really started something positive!!!

lostbutstilltrying - Yeah, best interest, but I do still sneak on it sometimes muahahahahah. Of course I tell the truth, so when he asks me I'm like "yeah i got on it" lol...and then I get a LOOK! HMPH! lol Ha he knows my tricks and loopholes.

emilymay - WOOHOO on the weight! You're doing awesome!

Kayleystar - lol when I gain I go "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" lol... I'm sure my weight is up right now. I actually have to weigh myself for the thread up there and I'm not looking forward to it! I'm all bloaty so who knows.

***
Well, I spent some time with myself for myself yesterday and I actually had a big smile on my face for the rest of the day. I think I need more "me" time and I need more HAPPY time. It gets frustrating with stress, but I really believe it is essential that I learn how to cope this year. Getting there. At least talking about it openly gives me something to stand up on, a good foundation if you will.

I'm sore from actually cooking and preparing food for this family visit. I made everything ahead of time so I did that last night. Funny how a few hours of constant work can make you a bit sorely. Plus I also did a lot of walking and things yesterday, so there ya go.

But anyhow, I have a big batch of this celery slaw I made up, vegan chili, vegan artichoke dip, and a lemon cream berry tart (raw vegan). I'm making a kiwi salsa this morning and then done. Going to do some roasted garlic as well...you know easy stuff. I get a bit annoyed at times at the family things when some people want these things "catered" even though there are not enough people for that and I quote "we should do take-out." I can't eat take-out (i don't eat meat, I don't eat eggs, I don't eat cheese or dairy), so having food I can eat is essential. Usually when I am stuck with eating something considered "take-out" I venture to the supermarket and get something prepared like potatoes or something. Other than that, I stick with like one place I can get a veggie burger. I'm limited because of my lifestyle choice. Anyhow, it isn't that hard to prepare food for yourself and other people. Besides I always share my goodies so people tend to like that. I remember one time I was just about to prepare a big salad and I got the "oh we don't need that, we have enough food." UM HELLO! What am I going to eat??!! lol. Maybe YOU have enough, but I don't! lol. So, yeah making stuff ahead of time is like awesome! You just go "here" lol...hahahaha...hahahaha.

I hope everyone has a great day. I can't sleep so I'm up early. *HUGS*

Hi just a quickie, I've been feeling sorry for myself & scared I was 'cracking up' so I didn't want to post. My Dad is out of icu, finally Drs decided it WAS a blood clot NOT a heart attack -he's only been in hospital 6 DAYS!!!!! My youngest son has been making up stories & school has been believing them-part of ADHD behaviour is 'telling stories/lies' I gave them info sheets about ADHD but I am SO upset that they can think the things he's been telling them (me stabbing/cutting him, my ex beating me...etc) are TRUE!!!! I've helped in school, fund-raised etc, I know they have to check these things out but isn't it OBVIOUS that he's making it up, they've known me for a few years & I casn't help feeling hurt & angry.
Anyway.....Carol you look radiant!!!xxxxxx
Jacquie you lok FAB too, younger, healthier & THINNER!!!!xxxxxxx
Emily, well I'm up to 20st 2lbs coz of stress but I'm back to hardcore S/W. Congrats on being under 20st, I bet you can tell when you're on your feet all day, that there's less of you!xxxxxxxxx
Annie, hope it all goes well in this training/assessment.xxxxxx
Catherine what car did you go with?xxxxxxxxx
xxxxxxxsharon

^^ Big Hugs Voodoo!

It sounds like you are going through a heck of a lot. Thinking of you.

Sharon - thank you so much. OK - time for big hugs coming your way. Come back and tell us how things are going, good or bad - we miss you.

Jacquie - have a wonderful time. Glad to hear you took time for you yesterday - do it more often.

morning ladies....

Voodoo: I am sorry things are so rough for you right now. My cousin had ADD when he was younger and gave my grandma a heck of a time. But things are better for him as he got older.

Jacquie: sounds like you have made enough food to feed an army. I am totally on board with what you are saying about having "me" time. I NEVER have me time. And actually I feel guilty when I do. I don't know why I feel guilty about it but I do. My kids are teenagers and don't need me around 24/7 you would think I would be ok with having me time. It will take me a while to get out of that "mom" mode I am afraid. BUT I am working on it.

As for me: Last night was horrible! I came home from work and about 30 min later was in so much pain. More nausea then anything but it was really bad for about 2 hours. I will be glad when I have my surgery on monday and get this gallbladder outta me.

The outpatient surgery center called me yesterday morning to tell me that the pre-op questions I answered didn't satisfy whoever it is that reviews them so I am now having it at the actual hospital! I asked her what question it was she said she wasn't sure, but if I have high blood pressure that is probably why. I guess that is ok..better safe then sorry. The last time I had surgery was 15 years ago after my son was born and I have my tubes tied. I am not gonna lie..I am scared as heck. Mainly cause I have had MRSA. She said they are aware of it and the surgeon ordered differnet antibiotics for that. Here is to hoping all goes well.

I will have my niece and nephew tonight. My sis and hubby are going to a wedding and I am babysitting. Heading to the dollar store for goodies. (thanks for the idea Jacque)

I might have hubby get on here with updates...if I am not feeling well enough.

Jacquie - I understand, but a lot depends on where you go to swim. I could use the pool at school for free, but it's too intimidating, so I go to the Y, where there are lots of old and overweight people.

I am planning on going for a bike ride today and finishing cleaning the apartment. I also have a midterm to study for and a book to go buy downtown, so it's going to be a busy day! What is everyone else up to today?

I have been thinking of hiring a personal trainer at my gym. I need someone to motivate me and help me get back into shape. Has anyone had any experience with this?

Pink - my personal trainer is awesome. Just make sure they know you fitness level going in to it and they do a complete assessment. Best money I ever spent.

Good morning ladies...just wanted to come on here and report that i did a 4 mile walk today! whoohoo! i feel soo good now that i have done it and i tried to talk myself out of it but i didnt i put on my workout outfit and put the 4 mile walking dvd in and away i went and my knee feels wonderful so i think that means that i will be back to working out every day which is a good thing considering that i have my next mini-goal of 40 lbs set for october 18th so i have to lose 4.3 lbs which isnt impossible i have lost 4.5 lbs in a week before so im gonna try and if i dont make it im ok with that as long as i lose weight but i would be absolutely stoked if i made my mini-goal and lost 40 lbs by sunday!

well have a great day all
Heather

Sharon-we went with the dodge grand caravan with sto & go seats. I feel so middle class now. Much more comfortable than my old VW camper, but not as cool.

We had a pretty cold game last night. Teens with snow, and a breeze that could knock you down. Sold lots of hot chocolate though. A couple of hundred liters.

Good evening, ladies! Finished up Day 6 of the 30 Day Shred. I've noticed that one day I'll feel great afterwards, and then the following day, I'll be just exhausted. Going to see if this pattern continues, or if it kind of levels out to a happy medium as my tolerance for the intensity goes up.

Today was my weigh-in day, and I'm down 1.6 lbs to 351.2! I'm only 1.2 lbs away from my first mini goal; hoping to hit that next week. Last time I lost weight, I couldn't see the change in my body at ALL. I'm actually seeing the slight changes, so that really is helping me on days I'm not feeling so motivated. And having clothes fit better just feels so awesome.

Remember, if you've signed up for the Biggest Loser challenge, that weigh-in is tomorrow! I know a few people haven't posted their results from last week, and just wanted to send a reminder! And the first week as a group, we've lost over 30 lbs! That's just excellent! And if you're not signed up, feel free to join us at any time!

Pink - Sounds like you're off to a good start! Any exercise is good exercise, so just keep it up!

Heather hb - Glad you were able to get into your workouts again. Just don't push yourself too hard when coming back from an injury.

Jacquie - You've been quite the busy worker. When's the dinner?

Sharon - I have no words....that's just insane that all of this is being dumped on you right now. Just sending positive vibes your way, and I hope this all gets straightened out sooner rather than later. *hugs*

Cyn - I hope everything just goes perfectly with you! I'll be thinking of you, hun!

Thanks for the the hugs, I need them!!! I'm plodding along but at least I'm OP.
The new fuse box blew last night so we now have extension leads going from those sockets that work to things we need. The kitchen has no power at all, we have electric oven & hob...grrrr but the living & dining rooms have power, at least we have a george foreman & microwave which can be plugged in in the living room, lol!!! We were having steak & jacket potatoes for dinner anyway, I'm not too stressed about this really though. My sis is letting Steve & kids go to hers for a shower tonight & Steve will look at getting a new fuse box thingy tomorow on his way home. Unfortunately he's working today so no repairs possible til Monday but at least it's money in the bank.
Thanks again for 'being here' for me, dunno what I'd do without you all!xxxxxxxx
xxxxxsharon

Morning guys! I caved last night and had little wine. Okay... a LOT of wine. Yes, and then a little binge on fruit salad (the kind in the can with sugary syrup) and peanut butter. Good thing I didn't have anything else in the house! But my roommate is talking about baking cookies today. Ugh. If there's one thing I can't resist it's fresh baked cookies. Anyway, feeling a little under the weather this morning and trying to wake up and feel a bit better so I can go to church without falling asleep (haha). Replies in a bit when I wake up!!!

Got up a bit ago, just a quick morning post, will do personals later.

Family visit was yesterday and I brought a lot of food, but they also went out and bought a lot of food too lol. We had a lot, but I didn't do that bad with eating. Just nibbled here and there then had a salad type thing for dinner. The visit was exhausting, had to watch the kids, which are boys lol. Everything turns into something about their butts lol.

Carved pumpkins and did some other crafts. They loved their treat bags and played with everything in them lol. Even ate the candy we got them, which were huge lollipops and a gummy tongue thing. EW! We brought some Halloween cookies from a bakery and OH MY GOODNESS they were disgusting. I can't see how anyone can eat that? I don't usually eat that stuff, but decided to try it, even though it probably had some sort of dairy in it. It was just the most disgusting thing I've eaten in a LONG time lol. I felt like i had dipped a spoon in a sugar bag! The kids inhaled them lol. haha. I think when I was a kid I love sugar too, but now that I'm all growed up...ew lol.

It was an okay visit. Had some family drama, but now it is a new day so no worries. Going to figure out what to eat today...I'm kind of in the mood for carbs ha ha. I'll stick with salads.

*HUGS* I hope everyone is well.

Good Morning ladies.... Well, i did my 3 mile walk this morning and i feel good!
My knee is feeling really good i actually ended up going for a walk yesterday with my husband around the neighborhood and he took me the route he usually goes and when we got back i asked him if he was surprised that i made it the whole way and he said that he was that he only that i would make it 1/2 way thru!

I sort-of have an NSV today i tried on my 1X denim jacket that has rhinestone hearts on it from quacker factory that my mother-in-law gave me a couple of years ago that i have never been able to wear..well i tried it on about 1.5 months ago and it fit but i couldnt get it buttoned well i decided to try it on again today and it fits better and i can button it ( if i really needed to) but it still doesnt look right button but i plan on wearing it on tuesday when we go to the cider mill with my moms sister who is coming in from arizona for a couple days plus im gonna see some cousins that i havent seen so i cant wait to see what people say when they see me!

one question...do you guys ever try on an article of clothing and it makes you realize how far you have come with your weight loss? that is how i felt today when i tried on the denim jacket because normally i dont see the difference in my body when i look in the mirror but today when i put on the denim jacket and looked in the mirror i really see how far i have come!

ok, im sorry enough rambling im just really excited about my jacket and about getting to see family this week that i havent seen in quite a while.

kayleystar...i am taking it easy with the workouts but definately glad to be back to working out though it has been tough to get motivated to get back to doing it!

talk to you later
Heather

Good Morning all

I had every intention of writing personals to each one of you but by the time I got finished reading them I am wiped out tired. I have news that I want to share with you all.

Thursday morning I was just mosing around the house about ready to jump in the shower and my chest started to really hurt and feel like someone was sitting on it. I was out of breath and felt like I was going to throw up. I debated about what o do and that maybe It was a really bad panic attack but it woldn't go away and I felt like I was going to pass out like no oxygen or something.

I called 911 and told them my symptoms and they sent an ambulance and paramedics etc. They took me to the hospital and my blood pressure wasn't so high or things didn't look that bad so they were thinking about sending me home. Well, while I was hooked up to the ekg machine my heart did some weird things and that made the heart Dr say we shoould keep me over night and do a test where they put a cathater through my leg artery into my heart to check things out.

It turns out I had a heart attack on Thursday and it turns out that I was born with tiny blood vessels around the back and bottom of my heart and they are completly blocked and there is nothing they can do about it becasue they are so tiny. He said I was born with that and that I must of just over did it, I'm thinking when I really pushed my limits swimming. So I am on tons of meds and the Dr basically said my life is pretty much over. In terms that they can't do anything for me except give me meds to try to keep the rest of my heart good. He wasn't very positive and Kiknd of made it seem like I'm about to die.

I am getting a 2nd opinion and thanking God that I have lost almost 300 pounds before this happened. I would have been dead for sure if I hadn't lost that weight.

I am scared and trying not to be depressed because I will not be able to pursue lifeguarding or teaching water aerobics. I can't exercise for a few weeks except walking slowly in 15 min. ecrements in a couple of days. I am trying to be hopeful and to know that God didn't let me die and that I still have a purpose or I wouldn't be here.

I just want you guys to know what is going on if I am scarce for a while. I will try to come see you all and know that I am thinking of you and praying for you every day.

I will be back when I can.

Blessings,
Annie