Violet: TOM is that bad for me, too. I get so sick and I really can't function for all intents and purposes. Without getting too graphic, the symptoms are horrible. Trying to get through work is torture. There has never been any solution for me except to wait it out. I feel for you. Mine is coming next week.

I think you have your friend figured out. Some people don't want to change. They are getting something out of their chaotic and dramatic situations. Some will eventually want to change, but you can't force them to see the light until they want to. I've stopped giving friends like that an audience for the drama. Life is too short. I do have compassion, but I also have compassion for myself and want to spend my time wisely.

John: that is quite a story. I am sad that you have to deal with a debilitating condition and pain. But, anyone can see that you have a spirit that just won't quit. I hope you find a woman who will appreciate what you have to offer.

for those of you with TOM issues, have you thought about going on the shot "depo provera"? i just started it, and i have had NO pms symptoms. i spotted for 2 weeks, but it was the first month. and it was really light.

OK all hope you're ready for a long one 'cuz I'm playing catch-up...

Jill- Congrats on staying strong and skipping the Mickey D’s and 7-11!! Breaking those little habits when you are trying to get back on track are REALLY tough for the first few days, but it gets easier and easier as you move back into healthy-mode.

Bbybear712- WOW. You get up at 4:18 to exercise??? I think that deserves a huge Girl, you’ve got some WILLPOWER!

Ratkitten- Yeahhh I’m a book junkie, I’m actually a writing major at school so I tear through books as quickly as I can get my hands on them. I don’t know if you live in the USA or anywhere close to New York City (or maybe they have them other places?), but I went to a bookstore called The Strand for the first time (my dad has been trying to get me to go for ages) and it is AMAZING. If you’re not buying books anymore because it’s too expensive but you’d like to own some of your favorites instead of borrowing all the time, they sell gently used and new books there for like $5, and the place is HUGE, it has EVERYTHING. This isn’t some musty old 2nd hand bookshop--- it’s like Barnes and Noble goes on clearance!!

Brenda- Hahaha those pictures with two people in your pants crack me up!!! I can do something similar with an old pair of my jeans (not from my biggest size, but close to it): I can put both my legs in one pant hole. Hard to walk that way though… it’s more of a “shuffle” out of my room to show other people hehehe

Ammi- Yeah we get some lovely weather here, I live on the East Coast of the United States so more often than not it’s sunny and HOT at this time of year.

Catherine:
!!!!! He really said that to you?! Perhaps he’s taking “survival of the fittest” a bit too far, there’s no need for him to be RUDE about it! Oh well, I’m glad it doesn’t sound like he hurt your feelings too much. And if he did, I always tell myself with people like that “there must be some reason that they are teasing me, some hurtful part of their own lives that they have to feel better about by putting me down,” and then I can feel sorry for them instead of feeling all of that futile anger and hurt.

Peggy- Hiya!

Nancy- I put my vitamins right on my bedside table, so I see them before I go to bed. I also keep some in a container in my purse so that I can take it with a meal if I remember (which is ideal), but it’s not the end of the world if I forget until bedtime because taking one without food is better than not taking one at all. I take “One A Day: All Day Energy” vitamins… I used to have very low energy levels and this seems to help a bit, but maybe that’s just placebo effect

BACK to Luan and Vicki!!

Stacey- Maybe it’s getting harder to do your routine at the gym because you are taking in less calories, and therefore less energy. That leaves less energy leftover to be devoted to the workout. If it gets unbearable, tone it down a notch! You don’t need to kill yourself to lose weight, it can happen at your own pace. Do you really think it’s from the carbon monoxide? That’s scary!!

Big John- Your story was DEFINITELY not annoying… it was so inspiring! It takes SO much strength to bring yourself back from that kind of mindset where you decide that you are weak and life is not worth living, and it shows how very strong you ARE that you could turn that around and battle off that hopeless feeling that we have all felt at one time or another, though many of us do not go to the brink of danger as you did.

Amy- When that kind of hunger strikes, I always make a bowl of steamed cauliflower or broccoli!!! No points, and it’ll fill you up, even if you are in the mood for something fatty hehe. (that's the "broccoli to the rescue" dance haha)

Well ladies, as for me the numbers on the scale are going up, up, up. I’m working out like I’m possessed or something and I’m sticking to my healthy eating plan, but the scale just doesn’t want to cooperate. The strange thing though? I don’t care. I used to absolutely obsess over that number, but now I realize that unless we’re talking about a BIG change on the scale (ie 10 or more pounds), it’s really just a small fluctuation that could be caused by anything: drinking too much water, eating salty food, or the amount of toning I did the day before causing my muscles to retain water. The changes are starting to appear in the mirror, and that’s whats really important right now.

Anyway, lots to do today. My mom roped me into washing the dog… uck! Hehe. Also I have to work out for an hour to meet my July goal, I really cut it down to the wire but I’m definitely going to make it!! I actually work in retail so I move around a lot for my job (definitely not a desk job, more of a run-around-like-a-lunatic job), but I’m not counting those towards my exercise minutes because I would be doing that anyway, I HAVE to do it.

Okay enough rambling. Hope everyone has a splendifforous OP day!!

John -- Thanks for sharing your story. It is actually quite inspiring.

Amy -- Thanks about my pics! I am actually pretty much AT goal. I gained a few pounds this spring I'm trying to shed to get back to a size 12 (size 12! whodathunk it!). I may lose more weight, but I'm trying to think about fitness and setting goals related to health and not the scale. At least that's for now. Maybe in the future I will want to lose more...

The funny thing is that my "after" weight -- in the 170s -- would be a starting point for many people. I am definitely still overweight -- 180 is back to obese for me. But I think many of us who start off morbidly obese have a different sense of these things. I know others have lost more, but psychologically, it's just not happening. And I'm okay with that right now.

As for before/after pics. I need to get a full body after, but here's a full body before (and the ones in my sig)
http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/show...23#post1683323

Hi ALL - This is my first post here so I am just going to jump in. Ok so the scale is up a half pound from yesterday and as much I hate to admit it - it made me a little anxious. I admit though that I had a *lot* more empty calories than I normally take in so that may have been the problem. I like to weigh in every day because it keeps me aware of what I am or am NOT doing correct but also it seems to play so much on how I feel for the day. I have just moved into a new neighborhood and I really want to go out walking but I feel so exposed and self conscious doing so - Why would I let what other people possibly think about me stop me from doing what I need to do ? ... Gagyrl
361/301/218

just a quick hi from work dang I'm late.

tthanks Amy i am trying to do much better this weelk and tomorrow i will sheepishly crawl back on my treadmill again.

First of all, thanks for the suggestions on the vitamins. I think I will try having them in the bathroom and making them part of my nighttime routine. If that doesn’t work I will try taking them to work with me and setting myself a daily reminder in Outlook.

Luan – It’s good to see you back! I think of you every time I see an add for “Who Wants to be a Superhero.” The clinical trial you are doing sounds interesting. Have you been up to anything fun in the entertainment industry lately?

Vicki – I haven’t heard of *******, but at my trainer’s suggestion I am trying to cut out more carbs. So while I used to eat brown rice or a sweet potato at dinner a lot I am now trying to do just meat and veggies. However, I am still eating lots of fruit, so I am not going totally low carb per se. I am really curious if your tummy tuck is covered by insurance and if not how much it is going to cost. It is definitely one thing I think I might need to consider once I am done and I am wondering if I should start seriously thinking about it (i.e. setting up a savings account).

Cris – That is great news that your DS is feeling better. I can’t imagine how stressful it must be to see your child really ill.

Lesley – Sorry to hear you are having personal finance issues that are causing you a lot of stress. Obviously I don’t know what they are, but one thing I have always found is that the more you know, the less stressful it is long term. So, if you think you might need to spend X to fix your car, but you don’t have a firm quote and are scared to get one, you will waste more energy thinking about getting the quote then if you just went and got it. I don’t know if that makes sense or has any relevance.

Brenda – Two weeks vacation! I am so jealous!

Stacey – That is kind of scary to think that your truck has been giving you carbon-monoxide poisoning. I hope you feel better with the new car. If you don’t, it could be because you truly are overworking yourself. I know I felt it yesterday. Sometimes out bodies just need a day to rest.

Catherine – I have always been a sucker for cute school supplies. It was one of the best things about still being in school! I hope it doesn’t take too long to find out how you did. I always hate having to wait for test/paper scores to come back.

John – It doesn’t seem like you are tooting your own horn at all. You are telling your own story and it is very inspiring to read how you brought yourself back from the brink and took control of your life.

Battle – I have decided that for now I can’t have peanut butter in the house. It is one of those things that I crave late a night when I am reading. I will make myself a sandwich (without measuring). Make myself another and then also take a big spoonful out of the jar. It is one of those things I find very hard to portion control.

Amy – I can get that way too on my TOM, although luckily it seems to be one out of every couple of times rather than every one. I would definitely see your gyn if it is causing you that much grief.

BodyToo – Releasing the scale anxiety is very freeing. That is great that you are seeing the changes!

Heather – I think you look great and I totally understand feeling ok in the overweight category. I can’t imagine myself as small as weight charts say I should be. Maybe when I am closer I will change my mind, but I also want something I can maintain without killing myself.

GAGyrl – Where do you live in Atlanta? I used to live there and I lived all over the place. My favorite was in Poncey-Highlands, although I liked Cabbagetown too. I know what you mean about feeling self-conscious about walking outside. Have you considered joining a gym? I would have thought that I would get a lot of negative looks, etc. but I have found it to be really great! I have gotten nothing but support. Of course I go to a small gym, but even when I went to a large one there were plenty of other overweight people there. Also that way you don’t have to worry about the heat factor, which is a major issue in Atlanta.

Patti – Crawling burns calories too!

I tried one of those Lean Cuisine pizzas last night – not bad for a pizza fix, except I would much rather put it in the oven than the microwave as they suggest. I was looking at myself in the bathroom mirror at work today and thinking how great it will be to have my breasts stick out farther than my stomach. I’m not there yet, but I am getting close!

lol thanks Nancy... luckily my house has been in such a mess i am getting some exercise in cleaning lol. august 1 my big big get off your knees day!

Battle-I lost a bunch of weight on Nutrisystem in 1990, and actually preferred for people to think I was sick than admit I was on a diet. That was during a time that people who lost a lot of weight were assumed to have AIDS, so how twisted was that. So being able to tell people is a big step. I can’t keep mine a secret anymore because I’ve lost too much to just pretend. If I was sick, I would probably have died by now.

Amy-I got hurt really bad in 1991. Back injury, head injury, blown ACL, dislocated shoulders, a few stab wounds, and a broken big toe. It pretty much derailed everything. I walked with a cane and then crutches, and in 1996, I injured my back again, and couldn’t move for 7 weeks. When I could, I couldn’t stand up straight anymore. I couldn’t walk more than about 10 feet. I had gained a lot of weight before the second injury, and a whole bunch after getting the wheelchair. As for air conditioning, when I lived in Florida, the only thing not air conditioned was the outside, and my van.

Booty-Yeah he really said that, and he wasn’t being mean at all. He was this very serious the end is coming tomorrow realist kind of guy. I wasn’t that large at the time, and I kind of enjoyed the whole, “I’m going to eat you first” kind of thing that semester.

Nancy-As small as I’ve always been on top, I’d have to have washboard abs before my bust was bigger than my waist. Maybe I could find a doctor who would take some fat from my butt and inject it up there. My mom has twice as much in her one remaining breast than I have in both of mine combined.

Wow, lots of posts since I was last here!

Our a/c in my office never got fixed yesterday. We got emails that they would be fixing it in the evening, but when I got to the office this morning, it was 77.4 degrees at 7am. By 10:30am, it was 85.5 degrees--I left. I worked from home for the rest of the day. I had a bad headache and a sour tummy, and the heat was only making it worse. I had strong urges to stop at a drive thru for some lunch since I certainly wasn't feeling like preparing anything myself, but I resisted Instead, I came home, had some lunch, and then fell asleep on the couch, so now I still have a bunch of work to do tonight--yuck!

Luan--great to see you back! I just came crawling back last week myself. I agree that biirth control can help with TOM issues, but I've heard tons of horror stories about the Depo shot causing excessive weight gain I'm glad you haven't been hit by that side effect!

Vicki--welcome back to you, too! You must be SO excited about your upcoming tummy tuck!!

Hello All,

Well this is a late post because I’ve had a wonderful day out and haven’t been near the PC until now at 9.30 pm. I got up this morning with the sun shining and it really put a spring in my step. I did two loads of washing, and exercised for an hour and a half before deciding that it was too nice to stay indoors. So we went to the Mumbles. I don’t know how many of you remember that on my birthday last year we walked from Swansea town to the Mumbles, and it took about 4 hours? Today we did that same walk and it took 2 hours! I was amazed at how much quicker it took especially as we stopped for an ice-cream along the way. I figure I earned an ice-cream as a treat, I actually chose a mango sorbet and a lemon sorbet, so I think that was a good treat choice. By the time we got home and still now I am exhausted, but it was a truly beautiful day. The sun was so hot for the first time this year that hubby got sunburned. He told me he put sun block on, well he did, but not very well. And at factor 50+ it’s not good to not put the stuff on properly because now he is lovely and white in some areas and in patchy bits he’s bright red

I have GREAT news about the spin bike too. Hubby looked at it properly this morning because he just couldn’t see why it was so difficult to cycle. It turns out that the resistance brakes were uneven, and although they were supposed to be off, they were actually gripping the wheel and putting resistance on!! As soon as he straightened them up, oh boy, it was like riding a new bike LOL. Put it this way, I went on it non stop for half an hour and didn’t come off ready to die I am so pleased it works as it should now because I love being able to spend more time on it and not hate every second of it

Patti - I don’t know about you when you do the housework, but by the time I am finished with mine I am sweating just like I’ve done a work out on the Gazelle, if not more so. So you may not be getting on the treadmill, but don’t forget that your housework is exercise too

I can’t believe I still haven’t caught you on the MySpace IM. I only downloaded it so we can chat and I never catch you! Did you get my offline message the other day?

Catherine - oh yes 7 is definitely not a good number for me. Although I did used to think it was my lucky number, not any more though I am guessing this latest 7 lb gain wasn’t all fat, I know I didn’t eat that much, but I did have high salt food, plus alcohol. Whatever it was I am hoping that I won’t be long losing it again.

I am glad your hubby got you to keep a pair of your fat pants, you MUST put them on and get a picture taken of you in them, I bet you will be thrilled at how big they are on you now!

Peggy - ah TOM arriving early is a very good reason to have been a wreck. Us women have it so unlucky don’t we, having to suffer TOM. I think as soon as we have had all the babies we want we should be able to take a pill or something to stop having to have TOM ever again

Battleax - glad to hear the scales are still locked in the car. Mine are in my wardrobe and although it’s easy enough to get them it’s not as easy as if I kept them on the floor in the bathroom like my mum used to. I know I would hop on them way too often if they were that accessible.

Heather - you are so right that it’s harder to diet when you are happier with how you look and feel. I did amazingly well when I was so scared of ending up dying or being more disabled by my weight than my ostomy! Now I just want to have more freedom, and although that’s a great reason to lose weight, I do still lack the willpower that I need. BUT at the moment I have the willpower, and I am hoping to lose lots more weight before it disappears on me. I keep thinking of the theme park trip in October and telling myself that surely I can be strong at least until then!

It’s weird isn’t it that although you are happy with the size you are now that with just a small gain of weight you would be considered obese again. You don’t look overweight, you don’t feel overweight, for goodness sake you are in size 12s, and yet on the charts you are supposedly overweight. It’s stupid. I am glad you aren’t letting the official numbers make you feel like you should lose more weight. You look fabulous as you are. I will stop losing weight as soon as I feel like I look and feel great, and if I am still considered overweight then tough

I think it’s time your hubby got a new job It must be so hard that he’s away so much. I am glad he’ll be home again on Wednesday. Any more picnics planned

We are having another day I think our summer has finally arrived. But you watch, we’ll have a nice week of hot weather followed by 4 weeks of rain!!

Nancy - apart from the fact that the bike looked really sturdy, one of the reasons we chose it is because we loved it’s orange bits I agree with you that it’s very sexy!!

As for your vitamins, why not buy yourself one of those pill boxes with the days on each compartment. Put your vitamins in it and put it in your underwear drawer, or in the bathroom near your toothbrush….anywhere that you know you will go in the morning. Having them in a pill box will be great too because you’ll never wonder if you have taken them or not.

Luan - hey welcome back!! I’m really sorry that you have had what you consider a humiliating time of things recently I won’t try to tell you that it can’t be that bad because I don’t know all the details. I am just glad you are trying to put it behind you now and you are taking control of your life and your weight loss again.

That double blind drug trial would really get to me lol. I’d want to know for sure if I was getting the diet pill or not. I hope you are getting it and not the placebo and that it will help kick start your weight loss again

Vicki - hiya, it’s so great to see you back That’s so cool that you are having a tummy tuck soon, but can I ask you why you are having it now rather than when you get to goal? Won’t you need another tuck when you lose the last lot of weight that you want to? Over here they won’t give anybody a tummy tuck until they have lost all the weight they need to to not be overweight, plus you have to prove you can keep it off. Then and only then will they agree to the surgery. To be honest with you though, I wouldn’t want an op now just in case I do need another one later. It’s bad enough facing the surgery once, twice is a big no no

Cris - sorry to hear that your DS was so poorly. Sounds like he had a really tough time of it, plus you did too with your worrying about him and looking after him. I’m glad he’s back to normal now

Glad you enjoy reading my posts, I always think that I write so much people just look at the length of the thing and skip right past it

Lesley - for the belated birthday wishes. This is my last year of being in my 30s, next year it’s the big 4 0 !! My mum was a real believer of life beginning at 40 and she went on her first cruise to celebrate the occasion. I would love to do that too. Now if only I could win the lottery so I could afford it

Sorry you are feeling so stressed at the moment with finances. They say money can’t bring you happiness, but it sure can bring you a lot less stress I hope you get your issues sorted out soon so that you can quit worrying

Stacey - oh no, I am sorry your butt came out in sympathy with mine it’s hard enough exercising without suffering from sore butts too.

Great news about getting the new car, sounds like the truck and it’s exhaust really were on their last legs! Worrying too that you think the fumes from the exhaust were effecting you so badly. I am glad you won’t have to suffer through that again.

John - here’s the understatement of the century MESSED UP IMMUNE SYSTEMS SUCK!!!!!! I had Ulcerative Colitis which ended up nearly killing me, it’s yet another disease that’s thanks to a messed up immune system. I am so sorry yours made you so seriously ill, sounds like things were really tough there for you for a while. Well things still are tough for you, but you sound like you’ve got a handle on them now and that’s wonderful news. Of course it won’t help you that steroids can give you depression as well as make you gain weight. Do you have a ‘moon face’. I was on steroids for a year when I was ill and I got the ‘moon face’ the zits, the weight gain and the terrible mood swings. I was so glad I could come off them. Your doctor is right that you are amazing only gaining 50 lbs over 5 years. I guess some things work out OK. It’s awful that you need to stay on the meds to keep your immune system under control. Am I being too optimistic when I say that I hope that in the not too distance future some cure or at least a better medication will be found to help you

In the mean time, I am so happy that you are getting on with your life as best you can. You ARE a strong man, you will lose the weight, you’ll get yourself as healthy as you can, and hopefully soon you will find your soul mate to share your life with and to have those babies you would love.

Amy - oh yeah a pill to get us to our target weights with no effort would be amazing! But it ain’t going to happen, so I guess we’ll just have to stick with the diets and exercise. I am glad I have decided to increase what I do, I really hope it will help me to get the lbs shifting again

You know what you should do for your friend, find her some phone numbers of people that can help women in her situation. Over here they have places like for women to go who are in fear of their lives. If your friend really does fear for her life if she leaves her husband then having some info might help her go ahead and get out. If of course you are right and that she’s a bit of a drama well at least if you give her the information she can’t turn around and say she can’t leave him, because you’ll know and she’ll know that she can. Good luck with it all.

On a lighter note, hope you get your snazzy new laptop soon. Nat won’t know what to do with all that extra time he’ll have to get on the Internet

Sorry you are starving today, TOM does that to me too. In fact that’s how I know it must be due, all I want to do is eat, eat, eat. I normally give in too, but I refuse to at least until TOM in November after I’ve been to the theme park staying strong with being OP!!

Thanks for the compliments on my photos, now if only my bottom half matched my top half I would be so very happy

SJ - that is fantastic that you have such a great attitude about the scales if you see a rise in the numbers. Like you said, you are working out like a crazy woman, you are staying OP, so you KNOW that those numbers aren’t what matters. You are losing weight, you’re getting healthy, you are making a wonderful lifestyle change. Already you are seeing the changes in your body when you look in the mirror and you are right that that is the important thing!!!

Gagyrl - hello and You said it, why should you let what people think stop you from doing what you want to do. Think of it this way, the very same people who might think stupid thoughts about you when they see you out walking now, will one day in the not too distant future be thinking “WOW look how much weight she’s lost and how that walking really paid off”. If you really can’t bring yourself to go out walking have you thought of getting one of the Walk Away the Pounds DVDs. They are really great and you can do them in the privacy of your own home

Jill - sorry that the AC still isn’t fixed, sounds like today you really could have done with having a cool place to be in. How’s the headache now and the bad tummy? I hope both are much better

Good for you for resisting the fast food temptation again. You really have got some great determination now

Annie - I really hope that your visit to the cardiologists went well today Please let me know as soon as you can. I may have had a wonderful day out today at the Mumbles, but I often thought of you and wondered how the appt was going!

Sharon - don’t know when you will get your Internet sorted but in case you go back and read all the posts you missed, you are missed

Ok time for me to go to bed now because I am soooo tired. Take care all and have a great day/evening.

Hugs,

Ammi

Ammi == It was great hearing about your "new" bike and your trip to the Mumbles -- you HALVED your walk time!!! wowsa!

As for hubby getting a new job -- he LOVES his job FINALLY... so I don't think he'll be getting a new one.

As for loving how I look. Overall, I'm thrilled. But I can tell -- especially at the gym -- that I still have a lot of flab and lose skin. Most of the time it doesn't bother me tooo much. But I am not expecting perfection -- don't think it's possible at my age and having been so fat for so long!

Ammi- I never got moon face. An I was moody/depressed way before I ever got sick LOL.