300+ And Ready To Try Again Weekly Thread #1098
 

:welcome:

We are a group of individuals who weigh or have weighed 300+, or near there. This group was formed to provide a place for others like us to find support and hope. We are aware of the distinct problems that come with weighing over 300 lbs.

We want to invite everyone (roosters as well as chicks!) to join us in our journey. We share laughter and tears, heartaches and fears ... joys and celebrations. We also share what works for us and what doesn't.

We know the thread can move very quickly, and that people often make "personal" remarks and keep a number of conversations going. Please feel free to contribute even if you can't make personal comments all the time.

Finally, we also have several extra threads going on simutaneously such as Monthly Challenges, Weekly Weigh-ins, Recipes, Bios, Photos, Exercise, Info for Getting Started and more. Many of these threads are stickied at the top of the page. Please feel free to check them all out.

We have found this thread to be more than just a support group... we have found it to become a home. We invite you to join us.



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Hello All,

I'm back. I decided that I have been away too long and have been missing you all, so it's time to start posting again. I want to thank you all for your kind messages, PMs and emails, it meant a lot knowing I had so many people keeping me in their thoughts and prayers. A special thanks to Annie and Sharon too for letting people know how I've been.

I don't really know a lot more than the last time I posted, I don't know the date mum died, why she died or even when her funeral is. The family over there that are taking care of everything don't seem to realise that I am desperate over here wanting to know what's happened etc. My cousin promised me that nothing would happen re the funeral etc without my knowing, so I guess there's a hold up somewhere. Anyway when I know anything I'll let you know.

I've been doing ok really. I have had my bad days, really bad ones, but I've also had good days. Yesterday was surprisingly one of my good days, surprising because it was Mothers Day here. I was a little down in the morning but I knew mum would want me to enjoy my day with my family so I pulled myself together and did indeed enjoy my day of being spoiled. Just in case anybody's worried that I have forgotten how to smile, I haven't, and to prove it I am going to go put a picture on the picture page in a minute of me and Beth yesterday :)

I've started going to the gym twice a week instead of just the once, and in the time I've been away from the board I've managed to increase my time on the elliptical to a whopping 10 minutes :dizzy: Oh well, it's better than when I started. I really enjoy working out, it definitely helps to clear the mind. Since I last posted I have lost another 7 lbs, 3 one week, and 2 the next two weeks including today's WI. I didn't want to use mum's death as an excuse to back slide. She always worried about my size and I know she was thrilled that I had started dieting and was doing so well with my weight loss. There's no way she would be happy to know I quit because of grieving. So I haven't!

I perused the boards while I wasn't posting, I didn't read every post, or if I did I just didn't take them in. But the things that I know I wanted to mention are to...

Brenda - nearly at 100 lbs lost, that's wonderful.

Jill - congratulations on your engagement.

Sandy - I hope things are calmer with your SD now. Email me anytime you want to vent or anything.

Erika Leigh - I'm glad Amanda will be having the surgery, any idea of a date yet? I bet you both can't wait to have it done and over with.

Zelma - sorry you are having a hard time of it. I hope today is a good day for you.

Sharon - so glad to hear you have done so well with the weight loss since starting your Cambridge Diet.

I can't think of what else I wanted to say, so I'll finish up now. Again thank you all for your support and friendship over the last couple of weeks :grouphug:

Hugs,

Ammi

Wow, Peggy, WELL DONE!!! I must get on my bike more often. Is yours an exercise one or a 'real' one? I hope you friends' comments have spurred you on, nothing like compliments to make us perk up & stay OP!!xxxxxxx
AMMI!!!! So glad you're back, LOVED the pics you posted (& the ones in the email) you look so much like your mum!!! & Beth had red hair!!!! What a suprise, I thought she was always dark!!! I'm glad you took yesterday as a celebration, rather than brooding over your mum. I know she'll be SO proud of you staying OP.xxxxxx
Well I have to go now, it's been really hectic here, my mum & dad stayed on Thursday to this morning (they're going to Spain again) & we had an early birthday dinner for my mum, with a huge turkey. It was like Christmas as Steve's brother came too AND it snowed!!!! I had a pretty busy day AND a FAB suprise, not only a card from my oldest son but A HUGE bouquet too!!!!! I almost fainted!!! lol Anyone who's seen my posts knows he can be a bit of a 'handful'/pain in the bum.
xxxxsharon

Chimi~In the US we call your pogo stick a corn dog, or at least by the description you gave. They are wonderful. I haven't had one in a very. very long time. I too, have been struggling the past couple weeks. I'm sure I've had a gain, but am too upset with myself to get on the scale. I go back to the dr today, so I'll have to get on the scale there. I know the days I get on the gazelle I do
feel better and have a better chance of staying op. And of course, water. I don't understand why it helps exactly, but it does.


Lisa~Your brother's H.A.L.T. absolutely applies to me. Maybe that's why I have been struggling so the past week or so.


Erika~Ditto on what Wyllenn said! Sorry I haven't emailed you. I haven't hardly even checked my email. Hugs to you.


Annie~Way to go on your exercise minutes. I'm gonna update mine minutes this evening.


Ammi~My dear friend, I am so sorry I haven't emailed you lately, I promise to get one off to you soon.

Sharon~How good of your son to send you flowers. You described my sons exactly. When ever one of them does something thoughtful (lol for one of them) it really takes me by surprise, and means a lot.






Sorry not too many personals today. I need to get ready to go to the dr. Til later,

Good Morning Ladies!:coffee:

Just jumping in quickly to say thanks for the sweet wishes for my Sammi! She is doing fine. She seems to be following in her mother's footsteps by being a clutz!:dizzy:

Ammi: Sorry to hear about your mom...I am glad you are back and am looking foward to getting to know you:hug:

Time to get ready for work...I hope everyone has a Great OP day!

Donna

Sharon - thanks for the welcome back. So glad to hear you had a lovely Mother's Day and that you even got a card and flowers from your eldest!!! Did Steve get you something from the younger boys?

Glad you liked the photos, I guess Beth did look like she had red hair in those photos, I guess it was a strawberry blonde, she always goes much lighter in the summer months.

Your mum's early birthday celebrations sounded great, did you have to do all that cooking and sit there and drink your cambridge diet meal?? If you managed that then I really have to give you kudos for that, I know I couldn't have done it!

Sandy - off to the docs again? I hope the appt goes OK. No worries about emailing, just write when you feel up to it. I know from experience that if I'm not in the mood to write then I just can't do it.

Donna - hello and I guess a belated :wel3fc: from me. I normally post daily, sometimes many times a day. I needed a bit of a break after I found out about my mum, but it's good to be back. Thank you for your condolonces.

Hugs,

Ammi

good morning everyone. Ammi a great big hug to you on your WI and i am so glad to see you posting again!not much to talk about today gotta get off here and clean my house a little bit my sister is coming over today for the night.so i just wanted to say congratulations to all on the WI!

Hello everyone! Just a quick post as I have a hearing about to start and should be concentrating on that.

Ammi - :hug: It's good to see you back and I'm glad you are doing okay. Stellar work on the weight loss and the elliptical. Took me quite a while to get up to 10 minutes too. But you'll see, soon you'll be even higher!

Confession time for Lilion. I've had a very rough couple of weeks diet-wise. I haven't been journaling, eating right or exercising. I never realized how obessively single-minded I am about things, but I seem to only concentrate on one thing at a time. Right now I'm in home-improvement/remodeling mode. I was SO obsessed with hitting 100 lbs lost and as soon as I did it's like my brain said "DONE! Next project please." But I don't want to be stuck and I certainly don't want to backslide. I KNOW I've gained weight in the last two weeks. Wednesday's WI will tell how much damage I've done. I'm going to TRY to be VERY good til then. We'll see. I haven't been exercising even! Working on the bath I'm just so tired in the mornings I've been oversleeping. That just has to stop! I've GOT to get back on the elliptical and I've been on the (horribly expensive) Bowflex all of ONCE since we bought it! I'm just so mad at myself and yet I still don't seem to get back in gear!

Got to run, I'm late.

Oh ANNIE! - WTG on the loss I saw!

Patti - hi, thanks for the welcome back. I love seeing your ticker being at 280, just one more little lb and you'll be in the 270s, come on, you can do it. No being naughty with the food when your sister is there. Well not unless you can exercise to help work off your indulgences :) Have a lovely time with your sister.

Lilion - it's good to be back, I have missed you all. Thanks for the welcome back. I am sorry you've had a bit of a rough time of it diet wise since hitting 100 lbs. I did exactly the same thing, and that week I lost zilch. I got back on track though and I am sure you will do the same especially with that lovely expensive Bow Flex screaming at you to get your money's worth :D Now that we pay to go to the gym you can mark my words that unless we are snowed in or I have a broken bone we will definitely be going regularly. Paying for something is definitely a brilliant incentive to use it! Good luck with your WI on Wednesday, I really hope it's not as bad as you think it will be.

Hugs,

Ammi

Ammi i will try to behave myself mostly lol i do eat healthy all weekend though and i am planning on a good weeks worth of exercise... i gotta get into those durn 270s! look at you almost in wonderland... i applaude you!

Ammi -- Great to see you back! So great! And thanks for starting the thread this week!

Lilion -- I also had a lull after losing 100 pounds. It happens!

No time for more personals -- I have to finish cleaning the house for company. My friend is staying over and we're doing a spa day!!!! Back exfoliations and then manicures and pedicures! Should be fun!

Hubby, who's been travelling every week is home this week -- he injured his food (either sprained or stress fracture) and is on crutches. It's great to have him home, but he can't walk, so I'm doing a lot of running around!

Peggy: Congrat on the -5 and also on meeting your Easter goal. Way to go girl.

Ammi: Wow, another 7 down in light of all you have been going through is so amazing. You are doing so well my friend. What an inspiration. Hugs.

Sharon: So glad that you had a great Mother's Day. How is the diet going?

Sandy: Good luck at the Dr. Hope your wi isn't nearly as awful as you are thinking.

Lilion: Okay you. You have to do your bowflex cause I want one and I need for you to test it out and see how it works first. lol. Hugs to you.

Patti: Have fun with your sister. My 3 sisters and their kids are coming so very soon. I can't wait. Hugs.

Well, I didn't make it to the pool this am. So, tomorrow for sure. lol. I have plenty of household chores to keep me busy. Hope everyone is having a wonderful op day.
Blessings,
Annie

Xena where are you, VAl oh val where are you guys? Miss you both.

Hey everybody, good morning to you all. I hope everyone had a good weekend.
Ammi- glad to see you back

Lillion- I am sorry it is so hectic for you but I have to concur on the bowflex, you have to use it so we all know if they are good or not. I have heard so much hype on them, keep us updated....


Well, I am going to try and keep updated on the thread this week, it is really fast though. I am doing great on excercise, and only slightly waiver on the diet. It is rare now days though. My body just doesn't like to let go of wieight, so we shall see what Tuesday's WI is like. Well here goes another crazy day of housecleaning and kid taxiing! Love yall
Carolyn

Annie i know you will have great fun when your sisters come.. and you deserve it to!

WOW, so many posts, so little time! I'm happy to report that I believe the stress eating is becoming a thing of the past....as in last week! :carrot: I am hoping to get back on track and so far, things seem to be going well. A nice solid 20 minutes of circuit training with weights and aerobics. I know that's not much compared to a lot of you, but I haven't seriously exercised in a really long time. I'm hoping to build my resistance up over the next month or so.

Sandy, good luck with that dr visit and WI.

Carolyn, sounds like you are one busy chickie! Keep up the good work! :carrot:

Ammi, welcome back! Your post is quite inspiring and sounds positive. Hugs to you...:hug:

Hey all, my WI today claims i didn't lose any more pounds, but on the plus side i didn't gain any either. So i guess that's something. i just got done walking on the tread mill, i got another mile in. tomorrow i start going to the gym with my friend from work. one thing i have learned since i started paying attention to my food and exercise is that i defintely eat when im bored. I worked a lot the first week i went into healthy eating + exercise mode and as a result lost 7 pounds. this past week I haven't worked so much, had a lot more days off and haven't lost a thing. this week i have/had sunday, monday, tuesday off. as for sunday and today, everytime im bored i find myself in the kitchen. i really need to knock that off! lol. I need to get out of the house, but, alas, it is snowing again!! and unfortunately i don't drive. But on the plus side, when i found myself going to the kitchen earlier i just hopped on the treadmill for a half an hour and now i feel as if i really don't want to damage the work i did so i'm not going in there!
Anyways, the treadmill hasn't broken yet, but every time i get to around 20 minutes it smells like it's buring but then quickly goes away. so i hope that nothing serious is wrong and it just needs to get used more often.

i also wanted to congratulate all the "losers" and wish everyone good luck this week on their journey

Lavandel-I know what you mean about needing a break from the weightloss stuff. I have had to have a couple of vacations where I could think about other things for awhile. For women who have 20 lbs. to lose, it’s a short sprint. For us, it is a marathon.

Brenda-shopping is way better than eating when down in the dumps. We spent the weekend walking our legs off going to every thrift store, pawn shop and flea market in the north part of Edmonton. We only came home with a bunch of used books and videos, but we sure had fun. I even stayed away from the concession stand food the rest of them were eating. I did have one bite of hubby’s hotdog, and then left them to rest while I went around again in case I missed something the first time. It is always so hard knowing that we’ve done everything right, and have seemingly nothing to show for it. The scale may not show it, but think about how much happier your heart and veins are. Maybe you didn’t lose that much weight this week, but you might have lost some inflammation in your arteries or joints. That’s a victory.

Donna-I’m the same way about things. If it feels great to do 50, so 100 will be even better. I worked in a morgue in highschool (way long story), and I’m the same way about stuff. My husband can’t watch a crime story on TV with me because I gross him out with stories.

Kymberly-I’m still learning new stuff too. When I first started writing down the things I was thinking or feeling or doing in my food journal, I was amazed at finding out things that were triggers. Keeping a diary didn’t really help because I could talk about feeling bad that I had overeaten, but seeing the food next to what I had done right before that was an eye opener.

Sharon-You know it is physical hunger and not just brain hunger when you start thinking about licking out the dog’s tins. If you want dog food, I can recommend a good restaurant here in Edmonton.

DJCJ-We also have snow hiking here, it’s called going to the grocery store next door. Sometimes I leave the house like that kid from “Christmas Story” who had on so many clothes that he couldn’t put his arms down at his side. I haven’t left the house without two pairs of pants on since October.

Anne-I once told someone that I had spent my life taking care of everyone except myself. Now is my time, and I have to be selfish to succeed. We are worth it, you know.

Karen-Nothing gives one knowledge like having already dealt with “the system.” I am always afraid of giving advice, not just because I no longer have a license, but also because people often take it the wrong way. I hope it all works out okay.

Lisa-there is nothing so eye-opening as knowing what you are actually eating. I remember when I found out that a bagel with cream cheese has the same calories as 3 frosted donuts or one low fat muffin. When I was taking a 5 day bus trip across the continent, I downloaded a list of all the stuff I could reasonably eat at a variety of fast food places. I was surprised to find that plain hamburgers were often the best choice, or only choice. Luckily they stopped at Subways mostly. When I told my husband that a poached egg on an English muffin was better than the toast with peanut butter on it that he’d been trying to “diet” on, I had to actually show him the math. I had heard that HALT thing before, and it really does hit all my high notes.

Onemoretime-I have gone to buffets and I have been on an all expense vacation at a resort. It is hard, but can be done. My biggest problem is that I will do so good that I know that I have room for a treat, but once I have the treat, it just seems to freak my system out and then I lose it. What I did after that was order in the room from the spa menu, that way I had something decent without having to see what everyone else was eating. When I’m really trying to slow myself down, I eat with chopsticks. By the time you get through with your plate everyone else has already had their seconds and are done. You don’t want to ruin a vacation by feeling bad about it afterward. Just go nuts on the salad bar and veggie station. You can always say you are a vegetarian and no one will think anything of it. If you do okay, treat yourself when you get back with a spa day, or new shoes or something.

Wyllenn-Shorts!! Oh my God. I haven’t worn shorts out of the house since 1991. And I lived 12 of those years in Florida. When I had a big weight loss years ago, my boss hired a fashion consultant to take me shopping. She did this color thing to find out what colors looked best on me, and things like V neck or round neck, etc. It made it so much easier to narrow choices. By the way, you’d have made a good drill sergeant.

ANNIE-Way to go. I wish I could lose 7.6 pounds in a week. I haven’t done that in literally years. I don’t even bother with the scales anymore. As long as I am above 380, they won’t register anyway. I work hard, eat right 90% of the time, and have seen no movement in 3 months. I’ve stopped getting on the scales because it just depresses me. I’m at a loss right now whether I need to increase or decrease calories. I’ve tried both. I’ve increased my exercise to ridiculous levels to the point where I’m now in pain pretty much all the time. This week I’m going to try increasing my breakfast and water intake. I’ve just force fed myself 480 calories of oatmeal. After doing my posts I’m going to go shovel the entire parking lot. Sometimes I feel like I can’t even allow myself the time to sit to use the computer. I know that part of it is my thyroid, but I can’t increase it any because my blood pressure is creeping up again. I know you can understand my feeling at a complete loss as to what to do.

Sandy-Don’t beat yourself up too much. When company comes, it is so hard to stay on track.

Nancy-Rents got so high in Florida at one point that I seriously considered becoming homeless for a couple of months to save money for a downpayment. Prices have now crashed there, so I’m glad I didn’t buy anything, but I understand how hard it is. If you want to find a “low maintenance” roommate, find out where they train nurses in your area and post on the board there. They work such long hours that they aren’t home long enough to cause much trouble.

Luan-I remember being able to drink like that when I was younger. I often say that I drank enough in college to last the rest of my life. Now I can’t even stay up late enough on New Years Eve. Partying is definitely for the young.

Brandnew-You don’t have to feel that you have nothing to offer. I haven’t lost anything in a long time. I don’t really know why. It has happened so many times before to me that I’ve almost gotten used to the idea that nothing will change again. Just do the best that you can while you are down, and when it swings back up again, hit it hard and things will get better.

Lesley-Isn’t it unfair how much easier guys seem to be able to lose weight.

Chimi-If you were only losing 20 lbs. you could go like crazy and be done. This isn’t a sprint when you need to lose as much as we do. It’s like thru hiking the Appalachian Trail. If you try to keep up a full head of steam the whole way, you’ll blow a gasket. It’s about taking babysteps. You have to learn one new good thing, or unlearn one bad thing at a time, slowly. Those of us who have yo-yo dieted for years remember the big, quick, weightlosses and how nice they were. They don’t last though. It’s like someone being born again at a tent revival and then only going to church for a month. You will have to be able to do this the rest of your life. It can’t be a diet until this or that, it has to be a lifestyle change to work long term. We all have 6 pack abs, they are just covered by fat. I saw a few minutes of Nip/Tuck where one guy was looking at another guy in the shower. Stud thought he was looking below the waist, but he was looking at this stomach. He said he did all these crunches, but couldn’t get definition. Stud said the secret was that he didn’t eat. He only drank protein shakes during the day and ate a light dinner at night. My situps with my other little leg exercises take about 30-40 a pop. I put on some music, and use my fingers as an abacus to keep track. Each time I touch my toes, I touch a different finger from right to left and back again. That makes 20. Every 20 I move a ring over a finger, so after it’s been on all 10 fingers, that’s a set of 200 situps. If I had to count, I’d go buggy. I just wish that I could lose some weight doing it. It is making me feel physically stronger, and lessening the pain in my back, but not leading to even an ounce of weight loss.

Rosebud-I think the secret to sit-ups for me is that I am a complete pear, and if I had to do them shaped like an apple, like my husband, I’d never make it. I also just get into a rhythm, and I think the bed starts to act like a trampoline. I listen to my mp3 player, and if the music is faster I seem to go faster, and slower, etc. I just totally flow into the music, and like I said above since I don’t have to really count, I can zone out.

Erika-don’t feel bad about not doing personals. I didn’t for a long time. I did good to know how to turn the stupid computer on in the beginning. Take what you need, and leave what you’re able.

Ammi-Welcome back. After my father died, I fell into a depression that caused me to gain over a hundred pounds in 6 months. I nearly flunked out of school. I know that he would have hated that. I’m glad that you have been able to stay on the horse. I wish I could do something to ease your pain.

Lilion-Whenever I got close to my goal weight, I always had this mindset that I had “won” so I was free. Wrong. I’ve never actually gotten to a goal weight because of that. The minute that we think we are finished, we’re finished. Think of it as remodeling the Winchester House. She thought if she ever finished the house that she’d die because of all the ghosts of the people who had been killed by her husband’s rifles. Just think of yourself as the renovation project that will never end.

For me, I’m off to exercise and do house work before hitting the snow shovel.

Oh My Goodness Catherine! I laughed SO HARD when I read this! :rofl: I am the Winchester Mystery House! :lol3: I have always wanted to go there! ;)

Happy Monday everyone,

Just wanted to write a short note to let y'all know how inspirational I find your posts (and your spirits).

I am struggling with staying focused and putting in my "me" time and the few moments I get to check in and read are helping me slow down a little and remember that I am worth this journey - and even though I may be starting off slow - it's all about re-focusing on what I want.

Now mind you I do hope the chaos that is going on for me subsides soon - but if I reframe that - it's just life - and my task is to just to keep focused and let go of this emotional overwhelm and find super healthy ways of coping.

Wishing you all a focused day.

Patti - I am glad that your leg is so much better, exercising when you are in pain isn't fun, and definitely not conducive to getting as much done as you would like. Now that you can work out hopefully pain free those lbs will really start shifting!

As for me getting to Onederland, I bet those last 20 lbs are going to drag by. But yes indeed I am looking forward to getting to that wonderful place. I still find it odd writing my weight as 2 something, I always go to write 3 something!

Heather - a spa day with a friend sounds wonderful. I hope you really enjoy your relaxation!

Sorry to hear about your hubby, I know you wanted him to spend more time at home, but I am sure this isn't what you had in mind! I hope he isn't in too much pain and is being a good patient.

Thanks for the welcome back, it's great to be back.

Annie - sorry you missed out on swimming, I am sure you burnt off some calories though from doing your housework. Did you get all the jobs done that you wanted to?

Carolyn - thank you for the welcome back. I am glad to hear you are doing well with the exercise, sometimes just keeping up with that compensates for the days when we aren't having a good week of constant dieting. Good luck with your WI tomorrow.

Karen - it's lovely to be back especially as I have had all the warm welcomes, yours included, thank you.

I am so pleased to hear that you think you have the stress eating under control. I used to comfort eat, it's one of the reasons I got as big as I did. Learning to get it under control and to truly believe that it's cold comfort to eat like a pig really has made dieting so much easier.

Good for you for doing 20 minutes of great exercise, hey it doesn't matter if you are doing less than others, the fact is you are getting active and as time goes on you will increase that time. Now though be proud of that 20 minutes.

Lee Ann - hello and a belated :wel3fc: from me. I love your great attitude about your WI results today. You are so right that no gain is brilliant!

It's good that you have realised that one of your reasons to eat is from boredom. It's figuring out things like that which really help us make the life style changes we need to. I find I want to eat when I am bored too, so on days when I get a bad case of the munchies I make sure I keep busy either with housework, emailing, exercising, or if I am really lazy, sleeping! Sounds like you made a great choice today working out on the treadmill rather than eating. It's great that having worked out you decided you really didn't want to waste all that effort by eating something you shouldn't, and so haven't. Well done!

I hope you love going to the gym tomorrow. I recently started going to one and really love it.

Catherine - I started suffering depression after my ostomy surgery, along with comfort eating, long recoveries from the surgery and just being totally inactive for so long it's one of the reasons I gained so much weight. I am not surprised at all to hear that your depression after losing your dad saw you gain 100 lbs in such a short space of time. It's not fair is it that some people like us eat when we are depressed, why can't we be the people that can't eat when depressed?

Any news on your citizenship, or more to the point do you know if your MIL has caused any major problems with it?

Anne - I can't remember if I have said hi yet, but just in case I haven't, hi and :wel3fc:

I am sorry that you are facing some kind of chaos right now, whatever it is I hope you can deal with it and like you said, find a super healthy way of doing just that.

Hugs,

Ammi

Ammi – All I have been able to think of all day is the fact of how incredible you are and how you kept going with your weight loss even dealing with your grief over your mother. Honestly, I feel kind of ashamed of myself for all the silly excuses I use for why I can’t stay on plan. And that’s the thing I realized, is that I have been using emotional turmoil as an excuse to go off plan – not because I can’t handle things, but because it is a convenient excuse. Sometimes there are times when you really can’t handle everything and you need to back off of really going at things, but I know now that this hasn’t been the case for me. I know this sounds like I am being pretty hard on myself, but it was really a light bulb moment for me.

Carolyn: Good luck at your Weigh in tomorrow!

Patti: Sweet girl. Have fun with your sister too.

Karen: Yea! Good Bye to stress eating forever!

LeeAnn: Hey, no gain is excellent. Hugs.

Cathererine: You are so right. I do know exactly what you are going through with not loosing and doing everything you know how to do. I can only say just try not to give up. That is the only thing. It kind of felt like banging my head against a wall but, I kept doing all the things I knew how to do and finally, finally it moved. The only thing different I did was pretend I had the lap band surgery which just meant I drink more water and didn't drink anything with meals and chewed my food sooooo much that by the time I had not very many bites I was satisfied in my belly and put the rest of the food away for later. Other than that everything was the same last week. I am trying to do the pretend thing today too. I am also changing my exercise from 40 minutes on the bike a day to 30 minutes in the a.m. then do my chores and other exercises around the house then do another 30 minutes in the afternoon. I'll see if that makes any difference at all next Saturday or if I'm even able to do it during the week. lol. I sure do love the feeling I have in my body when I get off the bike and I'm all tired and hot from exercise. LOL. I can't believe I just said I like exercise. Hugs to you and hang in there my friend.

Ammi: I did manage to get the work done that I wanted to for today. I cleaned the Bathroom in the master bedroom sooooo good. I haven't cleaned the shower myself in months. Joel usually cleans it and today for the first time in months, I had the stamina to clean the shower, I did the window and the front of all the cabinets and the floor on my hands and knees plus cleaned the master bedroom spring cleaning kind of. I love a clean house. I am going room by room and doing it. Tomorrow I will tackle the spare rooms and their windows etc. and the other bathroom. Fun fun fun stuff. lol. So happy you are back. It feels so much nicer when our Ammi is here. Hugs to you.

Blessings all,
Annie

Nancy - I am a firm believer of every cloud having a silver lining. I lost my mum, but knowing how much she wanted me to get healthy and lose the weight has given me the strength to carry on dieting despite my grief. My determination has made you think too, and to have your light bulb moment, so you see, there's the silver lining. I am sorry that you are being hard on yourself, comfort eating, or thinking you need it is all part and parcel of getting to the size we are. It's just habit that we turn to food for supposed comfort, so it's not a surprise that we use comfort eating as a reason to go off plan sometimes. I hope now that you have had your light bulb moment you will be able to act on it, and stay OP :hug:

Annie - well done on getting some chores done, and big congrats on managing the shower yourself. I bet Joel will have a nice surprise at that news! I love a clean house too, and love that keeping it clean keeps me active. With the size of your house you are sure getting a great work out with all the rooms you have to clean. My house is so tiny I can get everyroom clean in just 2 and a half to 3 hours.

Hugs,

Ammi

yaaaay ammi's back!!!! la la la laaa!!!! Welcome back ammi!! :)

sandybar- yeah totally agree with you about water... i think it keeps us occupied and fills the stomach too. I think I have gained as well but we just have to keep on truckin, make sure we compensate for the weight we regained and then some. Hows about you and me make a deal to WI in two weeks when we will have worked off the damage we have done!! :)

Catherine- wow you are doing full sit-ups from laying down to touching the toes?? That's amazingly hard!! Apparently that is no longer good for your back from what my trainer told me, so be careful!!! She might just be full of it though. LOL appalachian trail. I swear that's what it is. How long does the appalachian trail take to complete? I might do that- it seems less of a torture than this agonizingly slow weight loss and seeing burger king commercials :lol:

Catherine, Thank you for the comments. I had not thought about the spa menu. I will check it out as soon as we get on the ship. If I do breakfast and lunch in the spa maybe I can safely eat dinner with my friends. I love this site, if I post a question or a concern someone responds.

Cassie

Hi everyone, I haven't posted in ages. No particular reason other than I haven't felt like being on the computer in the evenings. They have started monitoring our internet usage at work so I have cut out all personal stuff on the internet during work hours.

I've been struggling a bit to stay on track and although my ticker says I am down 11 pounds as of last week's weighin it was back to 9 pounds down.

Since I last posted I have taken another calculus test. I feel I did well but we were off for spring break last week. I have class tomorrow evening and I hope to get the results. I had last week off work and I spent the first part of it on a long weekend trip to KC to visit my friend who had a baby back in October. She is a blonde blue eyed chubby-cheeked little cherub and I was smitten!!! :love: After getting back home I spent time planting flowers for spring and getting my house organized. I have been fighting disarray for so long and I finally have started to tackle it. Today my cleaning lady came. I finally decided to go for it and hire someone to help me. She is only charging me $40 and will come every other week. It was such a relief to walk into a spic and span house today.

That's it for me....just more of the usual mundane life. HO HUM!

I am so far behind that I can't possibly catch up but wanted to comment on a few things I did pick up on:

Ammi - Dear, I am so sorry to hear about your mum's passing. How distressing it must be to be far away and not getting the information you want. Hugs to you. :hug: I am most impressed that you have not let this time of grief derail your progress. That is amazing.


Lillion - I noticed on your ticker that you have broken that 100 pound mark!!!! Wowza!!!! Way to go!!!!! :congrat: :carrot: Did you do anything special to celebrate?


Heather - Size 10!!!! Now THAT is an accomplishment. You are teeny tiny, girl!!!

That's it for me. I hope you are all doing well.

Take care!

Catherine - i dont drink like i used to thats for sure.

Ammi- you have been in my prayers, please know that.

thats all for today, except the show asked me to stay another 2 weeks. i was talking last night with another friend who works in television and we were laughing because there is no other job in the world where you get excited over daily work... lol

Lillion-I’ve always wanted to see the mystery house too. I’m visualizing the stairway that goes to the ceiling and dead ends there. Having a head injury makes you feel that way sometimes, my stairway goes to the top, but no one is home, well, except the ghosts.

Anne-When I first started, I didn’t know what to do. All I did at first is stop eating out. I had to relearn how to shop and how to cook. It took over a year, and it was time well spent. We all want that quick start and quicker finish. We want to get done so we can start our lives. What you need to realize is that there are no quick endings, and our lives are going on with or without us whether we realize it or not. By the way, doing nothing but cutting out fast food led to 80 pounds lost in a year.

Ammi-My immigration is still in a holding pattern. People who applied the same time as I did have been permanent residents for months now. We were finally able to get immigration to tell us that they lost my FBI fingerprint report in September. It is the one piece of paper that had to be an original. We spent another $100 getting re-printed and FedExing it to the FBI. I just got them back today, and we are Expressposting them to Immigration tomorrow. My next bring forward date isn’t until April 27th, so they don’t have to look at my file until then. We also included my landing fees of $490 so that won’t delay them waiting for our payment. Hopefully, they will look at it this time, and approve it. My MIL has backed off and now says that she didn’t threaten to interfere. She was behind our marriage blessing getting postponed, so I don’t believe anything she says. Thankfully, the way it is set up, even my husband can’t access my immigration without my client number, and we have no intention of letting MIL have that. The only thing she could do is call CSIS and say that I’m a terrorist or made terrorist threats. Hopefully she won’t realize that, and again, I’m not going to tell her that. I have made the decision, and informed my husband, that I have no intention of ever being in the same room as his mother. I’ve told him that I won’t interfere in his relationship with his folks, and he can talk to them or see them whenever he wants to, but I can opt out. He’s okay with that.

Annie-When I first started the diet, I also pretended like I had the surgery. I only ate a coffee cup full of food once and hour. It allowed my stomach to shrink up. I saw a show where a woman who had the surgery could only eat that much. It also trained me to eat more often. I’ve gotten away from that a bit, so I think I will try that again. I’m not going to give up. I may not succeed all the time, like I’d like to, but to give up is a death sentence for me, and I know it.

Chimmy-I don’t lay completely flat because of my back injury. I brace under my lower back with some pillows. From the waist up I’m probably at a 20 degree angle. I keep my elbows at about a 70 degree angle so that I don’t get tennis elbow. I use the whole arm because it gives my upper body some work just like an elliptical does. You can’t do them with your hands behind your neck, because that will damage your neck muscles. I’m not trying to isolate any stomach muscles, I’m doing it as an aerobic exercise. If someone with my back injury can do them this way, it can’t hurt too much. As for the Appalachian Trail, if you start at the Southern end in Georgia, and go all the way to Maine, it takes about 6 months. I read a story about a physician who had gotten to 500 pounds who just packed a bag and started hiking, and by the time he was done he’d lost his weight, but I don’t think that was the Appalachian. I did a small part in the North Carolina/Tennessee border area. It’s so quiet. It’s quiet in a way that we have no idea living in cities with cars and fridges and phones.

Cassie-AA says that to keep it you have to give it back. I think they are right.

I’m off to type a speech for himself. To show how selfish I am prepared to be, he’s been sick in bed today, but that didn’t keep me from bouncing him all over the bed while doing my sit-ups. Making your sick husband sea-sick in his own bed has got to be a sin of some kind. I think of myself as being in a fight for my life, and nothing can stand in my way.

Xena: so happy to see you posting I have missed you and was wondering where you are. congrats on the 9 pound loss.

Catherine: I hear ya. Nothing can stop us now. Good for you. Hope your dear hubby feels better soon. Mine is ill too. He has a bad cold but you'd think he is dying by the complaints. lol. I just coddle him and tuck him into bed and he goes nite nite. lol. Poor guys.

I WON the Virtual Bike race against my hubby. I finished my 480 miles tonight. I ended up with 481.6 miles after my second 30 minutes of the day on the bike. I ended up doing 60 minutes on the bike today. My hubby handed me the $20 and as nice as extra spending money is, the feeling I have is so much better. It has been so long since I stuck to something like this. I have given up so many times over the years since I have gained so much weight because I thought things were too hard for me. POOEY on that. It may take me longer but I can do it. I am feeling so proud of myself. Something I have rarely felt in my life and it feels really good. YEA me.

Blessings to you all,
Annie

Annie -- WTG!! Sounds like you won a lot more than money can buy you!!

I had a great spa experience yesterday and had my very first manicure and pedicure!! They put you in this ultra comfy reclining chair and it's 1 hour 45 min. So worth it!!!!! I was going to say I can't believe I never did it before, but I know that part of the reason why was because of my weight! Though I have to say, this place (and esp this treatment) would be great for many sized people!!!!!

And now my nails are all pretty and polished too!

Wyllenn glad you liked the spa treatment you had! I have never been but I know that people have told me it is worth the trip.

After going to the Dr's on Saturday I was feeling ok. I have lost a few more lbs..imagine if I tried. LOL. She basically told me I need to get the weight off! Like Duh! My blood pressure is up but not to the critical point yet. Just walking from the waiting room to the back office raised it. Also when I walk my hands swell. It is a mess I tell you. So besides exercising and trying to eat better, I am suppose to set a small weight loss goal.

So that is what I am going to do. I think I am going to start with 10lbs. This is doable I think. This is sad but my scale does not go above what I need so I need to go today after work and buy one that does so it is acurrate.

Thanks for listening to me babble. :)

Current weight 338 / mini goal loose 10lbs

morning everyone!
Things are going ok here. I too took the morning off work. I was supposed to work at the store from 10-2 and didnt go in. I felt awful this morning and couldnt get out of bed. Working both jobs can take a toll on a healthy person, let alone one who is overweight.

So I got up, had breakfast, showered and have a little time to kill before I have to cook something for supper etc and then get ready for work.

Eating has been ok but I havent been eating as much as I am supposed to be. My water intake is down too. That is something I need to concentrate on today. I like to get about 4.5litres a day. Some days this week it has been more like 2-3. I want 3 gone by the time I head into work today. Time to get drinking... i have 2.5 to go :lol:

Ammi~ I was just watching tv and I hear that Elliott (from last season AIdol) has a CD released today. I remembered that you liked him. You might want to check it out.

Time to go empty the dishwasher before Rachael Ray comes on... Enjoy!
Brenda :wave:

Annie, way to go on the "win"!! :carrot: :carrot: Your enthusiasm is shining through your post! GREAT JOB!!:encore: :encore:

Brenda, it's good to take some "ME" time once in a while. I worked two jobs for a while and it just got to be too much. Speaking of American Idol, I just saw an interview with Elliot Yamin and he looks so different! He is so adorable, not that he wasn't before, but he let his hair gow out and he had some work done on his smile. Very cute! Great talent, too.

Ammi, super cute pic's of your family. You are glowing! (even in your pj's!) ;)

Wyllen, Sounds like "the girls day out" was a wonderful one! Nothing like a spa treatment to renew the spirit! I've only been twice, but I remember them with fondness. Hope hubby's foot is not too serious...:(

Catherine, I must have missed the immigration posts? I can't even imagine what that must be like!! Talk about high stress. And the Inlaws thing? Sounds serious? Hope hubby is feeling better soon and hugs to you :hug: :hug:

azcyn, Great job on the loss! :carrot: :carrot: Just take one day or one hour at a time and you'll reach that 10lb loss in no time!

Cheek, you sound like you have the right attitude to go about this journey. It's frieghtening to think of not handling emotions or stress without the comfort of food. It's really hard to change the habit, too. Just try to identify the why and the when and maybe you can focus on something else to get yourself through it? That's what I am trying.

Hi All,

What a day it's been today, first we went to work out at the gym, only to have to stop twice mid work out because the fire alarms kept going off, then we went to the docs and had to hang around ages waiting to be seen because although I was told that I had an appt the receptionist said they could find no record of it! Then I got home and my Aunty, the one helping organise things for mum's funeral etc had emailed me. She had planned on having a memorial service for mum later this year and to have her ashes buried with her brothers. I was quite alright with that because she loved her brother and Australia. But now my aunty says she thinks it best that she send mum's ashes over here. On the one hand I think yes it's a good idea because the majority of mum's family, and definitely 3 out of 4 of her kids are over here, but on the other hand no amount of nagging on my behalf would get mum to move back here. So would she be happy knowing she's ended up back here after all? HELP :( I guess I'll have to ring my sister and see what she thinks about it all. Anyway, enough about my problems....

Chimi - thanks for such a lovely welcome back. How are you doing with giving up cheese for Lent? Daren has given up chocolate and he's really struggling. He's got a list as long as your arm of all the chocolate he wants once Lent is over!!

Xena - so lovely to hear from you, that's a shame about work really monitoring internet use now. Puts a real dampener on things doesn't it!

Sorry you saw a bit of a gain at your last WI, at least you were expecting it as you hadn't been 100% OP and it was only 2 lbs, so that's not too bad. You'll lose that again quickly enough I am sure.

Thank you for your condolonces about my mum. I was just dealing with it all and now the worry about making the right decision about her ashes has me all in turmoil again.

Luan - thanks for keeping me in your prayers, much appreciated. How's life treating you these days? Sounds like you're loving your job! How are things at home, are you still living with your grandmother?

Catherine - wow it is taking forever for your immigration to get sorted out isn't it! Not helped at all by them losing your finger prints, that's terrible isn't it, especially as you had to pay for another lot!! I am glad that MIL is staying out of things, if she's too be believed that is, and I certainly don't blame you for not wanting anything more to do with the woman. I know she is your hubby's mother, but surely he doesn't want much contact with her either after the way she has been all this time??? Anyway good luck for April when your case gets looked at again.

Annie - I am so glad that you are feeling proud of yourself for sticking to your guns and winning thar race. I am proud of you too!! You have done so brilliantly with all of your exercise and winning that race is like the icing on the cake. Well done!!

Heather - that's wonderful that you had such a great day at the spa and that you thoroughly enjoyed your pedicure and manicure. I've never had a pedicure, but have had a manicure. I enjoyed it, especially when I had to put my fingers in warm wax, mmm, nice!!

Cyn - that's great news that you lost some weight, and without much effort by the sounds of it, well done. I think a goal of 10 lbs is very doable and I wish you every success getting there. Then you can set another 10 lb goal and before you know it all those 10s will have added up and you'll be much slimmer and healthier.

Brenda - sorry that you didn't feel well enough to go into work, was it exhaustion or were you ill as well? I hope having some time off will help you to feel better.

OOOOH great news about Elliot having a CD out. I often go on his MySpace page, made by a fan I assume, and they have video snippets of him singing. I love that man's voice. His CD is definitely going on my list of must haves. Thanks for letting me know about it.

Karen - thanks for the compliments on my photos, I was amazed at how happy I felt considering I am still missing my mum. It's amazing how having a wonderful husband and kids can help at a time like this.

Ooooh so Elliot is looking different now, I hope I see his new look so I can decide if I liked the old Elliot or the new one better. I know that no matter what he looks like I love his voice!

OK well I think I am going to go ring my sister now, I need to find out what she thinks about the latest news.

Hugs,

Ammi

ammi~ more lazy than anything. I have been working 10-2 at one job and 330-1130 at night at the other. 3-4 days per week and trying to cook healthy meals and work out all at the same time. I pulled a muscle in my butt on sunday night at aerobics so its uncomfortable to stand for long periods of time but that is just an excuse :) bugger is that I didnt even sleep in! Oh well, there is always tomorrow...

Brenda :wave:

Good morning everyone i hope you all are doing well. i had a great time with my sister as usual! .Ammi i am sure your mom would be happy with what ever you decide to do. hugs to you. HImAnnie hope you are doing well today!

Ammi, I wasn't going to post anymore today, but when I saw your last post in email, I thought maybe I should. About your Mum's ashes. I will tell you my story and you can do with it whatever you want. My dad died in 1987, at that time there were 2 plots purchased, one for him, obviously and one for my Mom. They were next to each other. My Mom and I picked out the headstone and had both my Mom's name and Dad's name on it. The headstone reads..."Together Forever" in two entwined hearts. I think you get the picture. My family is small, just my brother and I, and of course our kids and grandkids. (kids and grandkids do not apply here) My brother is older and my relationship with my Mom was very close. His, not so much. Her last year of life was filled with much suffering with painful illness and disease. It was difficult for both of us. During these trying times, she named him as her advocate and choose not to be kept on any kind of life support should the time come for that. I wanted whatever she wanted. It was hard for him to come to terms with that thought, I think becasue he just wasn't as close to her as I was. I always wanted the best for her. During this time, he kept telling me that Mom wanted to be cremated and I told him that I didn't think so, why would she have purchased the plot and headstone with their names on it? I know he was thinking financially, it would be cheaper to have the cremation instead of the burial. I even told him that she had taken out a small life insurance policy just for her burial expenses and named me only as the beneficiary of this particular policy. I think she had a feeling, deep down, that he may try something and she knew I would do the right thing. He told me while she was sick al this time he had convinced her to be cremated, because of the expense of a burial. Anyway, sorry this going on forever. Mom died while I was at work. He caims he tried to contact me, but he couldn't get through? I found out on my way to the hospital where she had been getting treatment, over the cell phone that she had passed. By the time I got to my brothers house, he had already been to the funeral home and made arrangements for a cremation, without ever consulting me or asking my opinion. That was in 2003 and it still bothers me to this day and probably always will. I want the ashes buried next to my Dad, and my Brother is not liking that idea, either. I still have a hard time looking at that urn when I go to his house. He tells me I can take it home with me whenever I want to, I have yet to do so.

I just want to tell you, do what you think your Mum wants. I know it's hard to put your feelings on the back burner, but it really comes down to her wishes and no one elses. I think when you get everyone's opinion, the decision will be clear. Peace to you and your family.

Where is Lisa??

The primate I live with felt the need to pass his cold to me, so I am typing on his laptop in case I need to throw up, it will be on his computer, not mine.

Wyllenn-I’ve never wanted to have a spa day. I have never been comfortable with people touching me. My mom had a beauty shop on our back porch (just like Truvy’s in Steel Magnolias), and I learned to do manicures while other kids were still finger painting. I’m kind of particular, and am convinced that no one can do my nails as good as I can. I wear my nails very short anyway, and it always seemed not worth the time. When I get smaller, I may start to feel differently. I’m looking forward to finding out.

Cyn-Don’t get me started on scales. I had to start out with 3 regular scales tied together with a plywood plank. Not real accurate, but ballpark, and at least it accurately showed the amount up or down. When I got to where I could use a good scale, I found out I was 40 pound heavier than I thought I was, and kicked the scale and broke my toe. I retaliated by taking the old scales to the parking lot, and running them over repeatedly with my van. The crunching sound they made still brings a smile to my face. And don’t get me started on doctors. They always used to tell me that if I lost weight, my back would feel better. Like that took a rocket scientist to figure out. Of course when I lost weight, and my back did feel better, I wanted to choke the “I told you so” right out of him.

Brenda-I am so lucky that I am basically able to do this weight loss stuff as my full time job. I don’t know how you gals that work and are surrounded by temptations at the office can handle it. I can insulate myself at home with only the food that I know is okay. If you are going to pull a butt muscle, it should at least have been done doing something much more fun or wicked even.

Karen-You probably missed my immigration posts because I originally filed for permanent residency in January 2006. People from places like Pakistan or China get approved in 3 months. I’m from the US, so it takes longer. I had a choice of staying in the states and taking about 6 months, or staying in Canada during the process and having it take a year or two. Since I’d never been arrested, and never belonged to a terrorist group worse than the Camp Fire Girls (you know all that fire making), I thought that my file would go faster. It should have, but when immigration can’t hang on to your paperwork. What other government agency would be allowed to wait 4 months before even opening your application (although they cashed the $1000 real quick), 9 months before starting work on it and contacting you, and then pretty much finishing your file when ever they get around to it. I’m not even allowed to talk to the officer handling my case. They are here in Alberta in a town right outside of Edmonton. I can only call the call center which is in Montreal on the other side of the country, and they can only tell me what my officer has actually posted on the computer screen. They haven’t updated that since last September. I’m a retired attorney whose native language is English, and I found the forms complicated. I can’t imagine going through this process and not even being able to speak the language. Catholic Social Services does immigration work, and as soon as I finish this process, I’m going to start volunteering over there to help other women caught in this spider’s web on inane bureaucracy. There are people here charging new immigrants $5000 to fill out the forms, and most of the time, they do it incorrectly. I have heard such horror stories. Throw in the fact that my MIL has threatened more than once to try to get me deported, and it has not been the nicest experience of my life. My husband has been worth the trouble, thankfully.

Ammi-The hubby actually call blocked his mom’s phone number, so when she wants to call now, she has to go to a pay phone. That didn’t happen much with winter snow everywhere, but now that it is starting to warm up, she may call more often. He wouldn’t talk to her at all except that he does business with his father, and needs to be able to talk to him on a regular basis. He actually phones him at a certain time of day at the public library or the senior center. I know she has a mental illness, but her illness has nothing to do with her underlying meanness. She is like nuclear waste. I can’t imagine living my life where my main occupation is causing trouble or screaming at people. The life he must have led growing up with that thing. They went on vacation once when he was very little, and they shipped her back in an honest to God straight jacket on the plane. Everyone wants to see their mom like that. She actually called the hotel on our wedding night at midnight, and bullied the switch board into putting her call through.

As for your mom’s burial, since she didn’t leave any wishes behind, assume that it wasn’t that important to her where she was to be buried. My dad was raised by a grandmother who was from Ireland, and she always talked about wanting to be buried there. When she was on her last illness, she said never mind. She had made America her home, and didn’t care where she was laid. As long as it is somewhere so that someone can pay your mom respect as certain times of the year, and it sounds like she would have family at either place. After the mess we went through when my dad died, there was so much fighting about money and things, I was the one who ended up having to make all the burial decisions. I was still in school, and had to pick out his casket and suit, etc. All of my wishes are written down, even my obituary is written with where I want it published. It sounds ghoulish, but the greatest gift you can give to your family, especially your kids, is to make these decisions so they don’t have to. I hope that whatever your family decides, that it will bring you some measure of peace.

Annie-I think you should spend the $20 on something terribly naughty.