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Rhonda: I'm no great shakes on the wt loss, if fact, I've gone up, not down. But I know you have to want to do this for yourself. Doing it for someone else never works. You've done an awesome job and lost a lot of weight. Do it for you, for how much better you will feel. I'm really sorry that things aren't great with your DH. Have you talked to him or are you just trying to do what you think he wants? It sounds like counseling may be something for you to look into.
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Rhonda, definitely do this for yourself, but I totally understand why you want DH to notice also. You get into a rut and need something to spice things up. A nice loss and a sexy new outfit would do it....OK, it would on my end! :lol:
Moma, no, I don't have that video. I was actually looking online this AM for potty stickers to give him when he goes. I had some Thomas and SpongeBob stickers that I gave him, but only a few, so I thought I'd look for something else. The hard part I think is going to be daycare. They said they will work with my method, but my preferred method would be letting him hang around in a tshirt and put the potty seat in the room he's playing in so he can get to it quickly...until he learns better. I did that years ago with a boy I babysat/nannied for, and had him trained in 2 wks.! Obviously daycare is not going to do that. They did say that when the child is dry at changing time, they ask them to sit on the potty. I guess that's a start, but I'd love to have them sit him on the potty every hour or so. You know, it should be easy for them, because his room is all 18 mos. - 3 yrs. Right now, most of the kids on the room are his age, give or take 3-4 months. I don't know if the others are trying potty training at home, but none of them are trained yet. |
for me/DH
~~ But I know you have to want to do this for yourself. Doing it for someone else never works. You've done an awesome job and lost a lot of weight. Do it for you, for how much better you will feel. I'm really sorry that things aren't great with your DH. Have you talked to him or are you just trying to do what you think he wants? It sounds like counseling may be something for you to look into.~~
I do want it for me as well, but it started out as me doing it to get more sex (to be honest). I have talked to him and as a matter of fact he is the one that started the diet and excercise. This was his explaination to the children "we are doing it to look better for each other and to feel better" HMM he stuck with it for about a month. Then he was off. I have been on this diet since just after Easter last year. Counseling sounds like a good idea on some levels...but he won't go. Our big issue is sex and he WON'T talk to anyone about that...he barely talks to me about it. I have to say that even though he isn't taking advantage of my new smaller size, other guys have noticed me. That makes me feel a bit better as sad as that is. Rhonda |
Hi everyone
crazier week than usual - I didn't get the job I was after but have had 2 interviews for other jobs so my resume must look good which is comforting :). The one I went for yesterday would entail a move to the country (at double th salary!!!), so there's been lots of 'whatif' type discussion at our place this week. Eating ok except for the 1000000000000 pieces of pizza last night, oh well. Let it go, move on, make better choices today, eh? Lauren - so good to hear Robby is getting better. Thise photos were adorable but made me all teary at the same time, what a la la eh? Momadance - wise words on emotional eating! I will try that visualisation! Rhonda - sending you a big hug right now - it sounds as though you are going through a really hard time right now. How would it be if you made the weight loss something for you, not DH? This is probably none of my business, but have you 2 been to counselling? I tend to deal with emotional eating by not having binge foods in the house so I have to actually go and get them if I want them! Also if I do 'give in' I try and minime the damage, like buying lower-fat oven fries or making wedges instead of getting chips from the shop, or a Turkish delight instead of a mars bar. Anyway good luck and keep posting - there's lots of support here |
Rosey, I have been there to the point you are now. Only when I tried losing weight for me my ex accused me of having an affair. (At least your's isn't doing that.) You are going to hit those times when (for whatever reason) the weight doesn't move. Have you tried a new exersize routine? Sometimes our muscles get used to doing a routine and we have to change it up. Maybe you could ask what your DH what he thinks of your newer look and explain to him that you need encouragement that is positive, like "you look nice" or "that outfit looks great" Sometimes men just don't get it. - until you have a heart to heart.
Lauren, If you have a Holcomb's store near you they have all kinds of stickers and charts that you could use. I used to teach 2 yr. olds in daycare and they had to be pottytrained before they went into the 3 yr. old room. I used to about every 20 - 30 minutes or so try and put them on the potty. (We had small toddler size ones in our bathroom off the classroom.) If they filled up a row (5 rows to a sheet) then they got a small prize. I found that bribing works well. Of course I was young and had money. But seriously check out Holcomb's. Hello to everyone else. I have to go work on homework that is due tommorrow. |
Lisa, I dont' have a Holcomb's, but there are some teaching stores around. They do have those itty bitty toilets, but they also have a potty seat. He does not have to be trained to move to the 3's room (which they say he'll probably go around Sept.). But I think they do encourage them/the parents to potty train more seriously then. There are 10 kids in his room now, and two teachers, so I guess it's kind of hard to put them all on the potty too often.
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Lauren, by Ohio state law, each 2 yr. old teacher could have 7 students and there were four classes in our room, so that doesn't seem so bad to me. We had 3 toilets in their as well. I had the youngest group, so I was in the bathroom the most. We did it though. Boy's are also harder to potty train. I was helping out another teacher and one of her boys "forgot" to hold it down. Spayed all over the counter, mirror, and another child. (Poor Katie K). Anyways all I am saying is don't give up hope. It may be tough for a while.
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HI all... Crazy week here! Trying to get back into the swing of teaching after a weeks vacation, DH had the flu, and 2 year old spent the whole week as a cling on. Actually he is hanging all over me right now... kinda hard to type. LOL It's hard to get mad because he's so cute 5 seconds after you get mad... so he makes you laugh in spite of being agrivated with him!
2 pounds down... even with AF! But let's wait and see if it stays off... major intake of chocolate the last 2 days! So glad Robbie is home! Goals for the week: NO snacks after 8 pm No seconds walk 3 times |
newmyers, congratulations on the two pounds. Sometimes that is what we need.
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PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT: Do not take a child that was sick on Tuesday on a whirly ride at Six Flags on Saturday unless you enjoy having puke on you. Ugh. Not one of my brighter Mom moments! :rofl: I honestly thought he was better or I would not have taken him on the ride. I felt so bad. Lesson learned!
Rosy: I'm so sorry that you are having difficulites with DH. Maybe he needs to get a physical and make sure everything is in A OK working order. A decreased libido can be a symptom of physical maladies. If everything checks out, I'd say purchase some "visual aides" if your into that and set the scene with candles and no kids! But, YOU GO GIRL!! You are doing great with the weight loss. Lauren: We are having potty glimmers here. He has run to me and told me he needed a diaper a few times this week. It raises my hopes! I bought some inserts for the toilet, to make it fit his small tush, but he HATES it. I figured we'd take a break and try again in a bit. I may end up getting a potty chair too. I can't believe I am even thinking about potty training! OOPS, gotta go. Somebody needs me. Hello to everyone I missed! :wave: :wave: |
Originally Posted by KarenK: Poor thing. Hope next week goes better for you. |
YaY!!!
newmyers....Congratulations on your 2 lb. loss!!! That's wonderful ;) Can you tell me what AF is?
KarenK, sorry about the SixFlags incident. What a bummer :barf: I hope that your little one is better now. I'm thinking i might have to use the "visual aide" suggestion for my dh ;) .... LBH, way to go with the potty training!! My daughters weren't potty trained until 3. What a relief to have no more diapers in the house ;) Momadance, thinking of you today, as I believe today is the BIG day...book-signing, right? Let us know how it went, K? |
~~sending you a big hug right now - it sounds as though you are going through a really hard time right now. How would it be if you made the weight loss something for you, not DH? This is probably none of my business, but have you 2 been to counselling? I tend to deal with emotional eating by not having binge foods in the house so I have to actually go and get them if I want them! Also if I do 'give in' I try and minime the damage, like buying lower-fat oven fries or making wedges instead of getting chips from the shop, or a Turkish delight instead of a mars bar. Anyway good luck and keep posting - there's lots of support here~~
Thanks for the hug. I am trying to make it just for me, with no expectations from him but even when I am doing well with it and feel good I still want him to notice and be interested. Haven't been to counselling, he won't go. I have some of those same tactics, I try not to have the things I LOVE here. I typically will have some hershey's kisses here for the chocolate. (are you in England?-the reason I ask is because of the foods you mention) Rhonda |
DH/encouragement
~~I have been there to the point you are now. Only when I tried losing weight for me my ex accused me of having an affair. (At least your's isn't doing that.) You are going to hit those times when (for whatever reason) the weight doesn't move. Have you tried a new exersize routine? Sometimes our muscles get used to doing a routine and we have to change it up. Maybe you could ask what your DH what he thinks of your newer look and explain to him that you need encouragement that is positive, like "you look nice" or "that outfit looks great" Sometimes men just don't get it. - until you have a heart to heart.~~
Actually my husband has eluded to that already. His mom cheated on his dad after loosing weight and going to the tanning bed...which is what I am doing now. He called me by my MILs name. (Big NO NO) I don't think he honestly believes that, we were discussing my unhappiness with our sex life at the time. I am really hoping it gets nice outside here real soon, so we can play soccer more often in the yard with the kids. I am trying to get inspired to do the work outs more often and vary them. I have asked him at times, but I get half hearted answers that end up making me feel worse. First of all if I have to ask him what he thinks then it must not be a very noticable change. Secondly when I get answers like "you look better than you have for a long time" to me that is very conditional and his way of not hurting my feelings. I understand that he doesn't want to hurt my feelings but I also know that I am looking GOOD right now...not just BETTER than I have in a long time. I am not sure what he is hoping for with this weight loss, I am not going to look like a swimsuit model...my body AC(after Children) just isn't the same. I feel like he has unrealistic expectations. I have talked to him about a lot of this already. I haven't really felt up to talking to him about it recently. I have been feeling a bit down and feel like if we start talking about all of this it will make it worse and I will become very emotional during the conversation. (something I would rather not do, again) Rhonda |
decreased libido
~~I'm so sorry that you are having difficulites with DH. Maybe he needs to get a physical and make sure everything is in A OK working order. A decreased libido can be a symptom of physical maladies. If everything checks out, I'd say purchase some "visual aides" if your into that and set the scene with candles and no kids! But, YOU GO GIRL!! You are doing great with the weight loss. ~~
My husband has ALWAYS had a low libido. (nothing new) He has had physicals and had his testosterone levels checked. (they are low but still in the normal range) Everything is in working order. We went the visual aides route once before, didn't work out well for me, it seemed like a good idea at the time and even during, but after when I stopped to think about it and it was the most he's been into sex (EVER) I felt worse. I CAN'T look like those women...not with out a lot of plastic surgery. I really just want to feel sexually disired by my DH. Even when I was 18, 120 lbs and tone he still wasn't into sex. I don't know why this weight loss and all is making me hope for more interest from him...I guess I have to try something or I will go nuts. Rhonda |
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