Losing 36 pounds has made a world of difference in my self esteem. Five years ago when I hit 195 pounds I was disgusted with myself. I felt terrible about the way I looked. Now I am happy to be 195. I feel good about myself, I can actually look in a full length mirror now. Not only that I can look and think wow, I look good. What change of perspective makes. Now granted I still have my bad days, but who don't. Now if I can feel this good about myself then anyone can. It really is enough to keep me going. I hope others feel this way.
Jen

I definitely feel that way! When I hit 150 for the first time (on my way up, grr), I was devastated. I thought to myself "OMG, I am so fat, I can't believe I am so fat, I ought to die for being so fat." When I had been lighter, I told myself "if I ever get to 150 I will kill myself." Well, obviously I didn't kill myself at 150, or 160, or 170, or even 180.

On the way down, 150 is my milestone. I felt great at 150 this time around.

I still have a lot of days when I look in the mirror and all I see is fat though. I have this problem with clothing too -- my brain knows that I will fit into a size 8, but when I walk past stores I think to myself "I am too fat to fit in clothes from that store, I bet they don't even carry size 12." It doesn't occur to me until much later that I shouldn't care if they carry size 12 or not because size 12 is too big for me!

Of course I am wearing a pair of size 14 jeans from Lane Bryant right now. They are big, but have enough elasticity that they still fit okay!

Paperclippy: ditto that! I still am concerned with finding size 12s in everything. When I know that I'm in a 10, and then I talk myself into buying the 12 just in case....what??? sometimes I'm just ******ed.

A good part of it too is that your're exercising which has actually been proven to boost your mood. I noticed that when I am staying on track and exercising routinely I feel a lot better about myself. Just knowing that I am doing something good for me. Also changing my perspective put a whole new light on things. I was in a bad place last year and I made a lot of changes for me. I decided to look at everything more positively and it really makes me fee better about myself!

Sara G.