The last few months have been a ROLLERCOASTER of emotions. I have had experiences ranging from my dreams coming true, to my heart being broken, to extreme anger to stress to absolute bliss- and I have dealt with most of it by comforting myself or celebrating with food. For the last few months I have slowly gained back 20 of the 30 lbs I had lost-- I know it could be worse, but I have been aware and "trying" to stop it-- but letting excuses get in the way,,, and what terrifies me is not being able to put the breaks on the gaining. I don't even care if I lose at this point, I just want to maintain for at least a month or two before I re-evaluate and it has seemed so difficult lately ...

I know that's something a lot of people experience- but tonight was a little different. I had ANOTHER "screw it, I'll start tomorrow" day- and after completely pigging out I got in the shower and the part of me that I thought was LONG gone came back... I purged. this cycle has to stop NOW.

I used to visit this site all the time and had friends here who's names I recognized, but I thought that I had my weight and eating under control and I stopped. But now I see that I leaned on this site for support more than I realized, and I'm back to give and get as much love and support as possible.

I'm starting now. Not tomorrow- not January 1st. And I amaking a commitment to anyone who happens to read this post. No more treating my body like crap. God gave me this amazing body as a gift and I have not been acting bet appreciative of it lately- so, here goes.

It's amazing how great it feels to get that out there to SOMEONE who might understand...

Good for you Danzigurl77. You're doing the right thing for sure. I LOVE that you are starting tomorrow and not waiting until the 1st. We are all in the midst of this journey, at whatever state we are in. What has happened to you is completely understandable and completely reparable.