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-   -   Valentines day sucks. (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/20-somethings/251246-valentines-day-sucks.html)

MusicalAstronaut 01-23-2012 07:58 PM

I never cared much either way about Valentine's Day. It was a coincidence that that was the day I really met my ex (who dumped me a month ago after almost 2 years together). As a result, it became a special day to us. So I'm looking forward to it like I look forward to getting a cavity drilled while having heart surgery.

He had the same opinion about it as you do, OP. It was only special to us because that's the day that we started hanging out, which led to us being together. I bet now he's going to be all "It's Singles Awareness Day! Wahhh I'm forever alone because I dumped my gf who loved me and wanted to marry me! Poor me!".

I'm not bitter. :mad:

Also, :hug: to you, OP. I hope your BF can see how special you are and treat you like every day is Valentine's Day.

MusicalAstronaut 01-23-2012 08:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jayohwhy (Post 4185271)
I gave him his present.. And later pushed him into a bush. :)

You are my hero. When I saw my ex last week (first time after he left me) I could tell he was a little scared of what I might do. I didn't do anything....but I really wanted to push him into the pool. Especially after he told me one reason he left me was because I "didn't support his religion" (as previously stated, I was willing to marry him which meant switching to his church so that's wrong) because I didn't drag him out of bed on Sundays. Um, I am not your mother! I can make sure you're awake but it's NOT my fault that you won't go!

Still not bitter.:devil:

sontaikle 01-23-2012 08:08 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MiZTaCCen (Post 4185221)
So are you telling me that a day that is over commercialized is a day where you feel lucky to have found your fiance so you can celebrate? How about your anniversary, or a random day. Doesn't really make sense to me that you couldn't celebrate it on any other day?

Because we forget our anniversary. Valentine's Day is all over the place so we can't forget.

Christmas is commercialized yet it's "ok" to celebrate the gift-giving aspect of that. Why is Valentine's Day any different?

MiZTaCCen 01-23-2012 08:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sontaikle (Post 4185392)
Because we forget our anniversary. Valentine's Day is all over the place so we can't forget.

Christmas is commercialized yet it's "ok" to celebrate the gift-giving aspect of that. Why is Valentine's Day any different?

lmfao! reminds me of my parents when I told them. Happy Anniversary! They were like...oh it's that day huh haha.


I can't compare Christmas to valentines day. Christmas over the years have been commercialized because of people, but the real aspect behind Christmas is to celebrate Jesus' birthday or whatever, some people actually go through christmas on a religious point of view and NOT how many present's they're getting. That is why I can't compare a made up commercialized day of "Love" to the celebrating of our lords birthday.

sontaikle 01-23-2012 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by MiZTaCCen (Post 4185408)
lmfao! reminds me of my parents when I told them. Happy Anniversary! They were like...oh it's that day huh haha.

Yeah that's us. I'd bet a lot of money that this year April 26 will come and go and we'll say "oh right, we've been together four years."

I bet the same thing will happen on the one year anniversary of our engagement.


Quote:

I can't compare Christmas to valentines day. Christmas over the years have been commercialized because of people, but the real aspect behind Christmas is to celebrate Jesus' birthday or whatever, some people actually go through christmas on a religious point of view and NOT how many present's they're getting. That is why I can't compare a made up commercialized day of "Love" to the celebrating of our lords birthday.
Actually Valentine's Day has religious significance too (just you know, obviously not as much as Christmas). It's not made up. It's just been commercialized like Christmas, Easter and other holidays.

That's why I always shrug when people complain about it. Sure, it's commercialized, but it does have meaning. Do I think it's silly the way people feel they have to go all out? Yeah, I think that's kind of ridiculous. There's no way I'd expect that from my fiance, but each year we do something a little special.

MiZTaCCen 01-23-2012 09:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sontaikle (Post 4185460)

That's why I always shrug when people complain about it. Sure, it's commercialized, but it does have meaning. Do I think it's silly the way people feel they have to go all out? Yeah, I think that's kind of ridiculous. There's no way I'd expect that from my fiance, but each year we do something a little special.


Okay I get your point but my whole point was D-bag guys who do NOTHING for their girl while they are dating them except for on days like this. Kind of kills the whole meaning. I wasn't complaining about people being in love and enjoying the day. I was complaining about D-Bags who do nothing for their girls until something like this comes up. :p

duckyyellowfeet 01-23-2012 11:38 PM

I AM in a committed relationship and neither one of us cares. But our anniversary is March 5th and her birthday is February 28th, so we hit a lot of celebrations right after V-day. I do think its nice to have (granted, slightly forced) day to remember the value of love--not only in romantic relationships but between the people you truly care about in life.

This year, because my girlfriend and I are both on the diet wagon, I'm donating the money I would have spent on a fancy dinner to a domestic violence program I care a lot about--as a reminder that not everyone is as lucky to feel safe in their love.

LuciMarie 01-24-2012 12:50 AM

There's one way that I came to view Valentine's day in a positive light. It's not always about spending it with a significant other, but with those you love and care about (even just yourself and some sappy movies!).
As a back note I should mention that my resentment for VDay is because my birthday is on the 12th and people always referred to me as a Valentine's baby and as I got older always said my boyfriend must do extra special things for me. That was a bigger blow to my self esteem since I never had one for my birthday...
ANYWAY, I write a blog for my University and last year talked about my experience in high school where my opinion changed. (I'm lazy so I'm copying and pasting it from the original entry :lol: )

When I was in high school there was a man who waited by the stairs as people went down to catch their trains (yes, I took the train to school). Every Valentine’s day he would wait there with boxes. Every woman that went by, no matter her age, got a rose. My freshman year I was still a bit miffed around V-Day as I usually was and when I was handed my rose I had to stop.
“Thank you, but why?”
He smiled and tapped his nose, much like Santa Clause does in illustrations. “Everyone deserves to be happy. Sometimes they need a little reminder. You have a wonderful Valentine’s Day and just remember to keep showing that beautiful smile.”
Naturally I just smiled wider. I have the most awkward smile in the entire world, I say this with sincerity. Sometimes you just need to hear something nice though.


Sappy, but it's true. It's the little things in life that made V-Day/Single's Awareness/Anna Howard Shaw Day more bearable.

mandalinn82 01-24-2012 01:04 AM

My wife is a floral designer. That means that, for 8 of the 11 years we've been together, our Valentine's Day has looked like this:

-Three or so days before, wife disappears at work for 14 hour days. I spend my lonely hours at home baking snacks and making little fingerfoods and sandwiches to fuel the crew through the long hours.
-The night before, wife works until 1 or 2 in the morning. I bring more snacks, and usually go in to help if I can (I am NOT talented like she is, but I can tie ribbons on vases, write out cards, and organize deliveries). This will be the only time we spend together, unless we're sleeping, until after the holiday.
-On Valentine's Day, wife staggers out of bed after 3-4 hours of sleep, rushes off to the shop, and disappears until 6 or 7pm.
-After work, wife collapses in a heap on the couch. One year, I made her dinner, and she literally fell asleep while eating, with her fork mid-way to her mouth.

We're also TERRIBLE at remembering anniversaries (we have several of them, and it's hard to keep track!). We do a lot of little things randomly, but we're really bad at "enforced romantic occasions".

konfyoozed 01-24-2012 01:05 AM

i kinda like valentine's day, now.

my husband isn't really a romantic sort, so i've told him he's got 3 days out of the year where romance is required and i'm not gonna tell him how to do it so he has to be creative. valentine's day, my birthday, and our anniversary. it's always fun to see what he comes up with on those days. :)

Riestrella 01-24-2012 06:30 AM

One Valentine's Day my boyfriend and I got a Subway and ate it on a hill overlooking the sea. That was about it. It was awesome =).

MiZTaCCen 01-24-2012 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by duckyyellowfeet (Post 4185651)
This year, because my girlfriend and I are both on the diet wagon, I'm donating the money I would have spent on a fancy dinner to a domestic violence program I care a lot about--as a reminder that not everyone is as lucky to feel safe in their love.

That is amazing and a really good idea! :hug:

Quote:

Originally Posted by LuciMarie (Post 4185701)
When I was in high school there was a man who waited by the stairs as people went down to catch their trains (yes, I took the train to school). Every Valentine’s day he would wait there with boxes. Every woman that went by, no matter her age, got a rose. My freshman year I was still a bit miffed around V-Day as I usually was and when I was handed my rose I had to stop.
“Thank you, but why?”
He smiled and tapped his nose, much like Santa Clause does in illustrations. “Everyone deserves to be happy. Sometimes they need a little reminder. You have a wonderful Valentine’s Day and just remember to keep showing that beautiful smile.”
Naturally I just smiled wider. I have the most awkward smile in the entire world, I say this with sincerity. Sometimes you just need to hear something nice though.


I love it! Thank you for sharing that!

Quote:

Originally Posted by mandalinn82 (Post 4185709)
-After work, wife collapses in a heap on the couch. One year, I made her dinner, and she literally fell asleep while eating, with her fork mid-way to her mouth.

lol aww thats cute! I don't know why I guess it reminded me when I was 5 or 6 eating at the dinner table and when I didn't get my nap I'd always fall asleep in the middle of dinner. lol

Quote:

Originally Posted by k0nfyo0zed (Post 4185711)
i kinda like valentine's day, now.

my husband isn't really a romantic sort, so i've told him he's got 3 days out of the year where romance is required and i'm not gonna tell him how to do it so he has to be creative. valentine's day, my birthday, and our anniversary. it's always fun to see what he comes up with on those days. :)

:)

Quote:

Originally Posted by Riestrella (Post 4185790)
One Valentine's Day my boyfriend and I got a Subway and ate it on a hill overlooking the sea. That was about it. It was awesome =).

That's actually really romantic, awww :hug:


hmm thanks guys. Sometimes I just need to see a new light on things and your stories were cute I really just needed to hear them! Now I remember why I post here hehe. :hug:

Riestrella 01-24-2012 10:13 AM

I'm glad you had a chance to vent and let it all out. I didn't get a boyfriend until I was 19 years old while all my friends got cards and flowers from their admirers or boyfriends throughout their teens while I got nothing. Then when I did have my first Valentine's with the first boyfriend, we didn't do anything so it still felt like I was missing out! It did suck, but I treated it like any other day.

Now that I do have a great boyfriend, it's just nice to have a day that I missed out on I suppose. Even if it was just getting a fatty sandwich and talking on a hill, it's still really nice to feel apart of something that was missing in my life for so long. This year I get to spend the day with the boyfriend, which we couldn't do last year, and I've no idea if he's got something planned or will get me a gift - but either way even if I got a "I love you" it'll be fine. Last year I got sent a video game - best Valentine's gift ever!

If you have someone on Valentine's - great, have fun whatever you do, just don't put so much meaning into it the fact you're together is enough. If you don't have someone, then that's awesome too - it's just another day! That's how I've lived it for all my life!

sontaikle 01-24-2012 10:27 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Riestrella (Post 4186094)

Now that I do have a great boyfriend, it's just nice to have a day that I missed out on I suppose. Even if it was just getting a fatty sandwich and talking on a hill, it's still really nice to feel apart of something that was missing in my life for so long. This year I get to spend the day with the boyfriend, which we couldn't do last year, and I've no idea if he's got something planned or will get me a gift - but either way even if I got a "I love you" it'll be fine. Last year I got sent a video game - best Valentine's gift ever!

It sounds like you have a great guy :)

My fiance and I have never gone all-out on Valentine's Day either. Depending on how much money we have we might go out to dinner or see a movie. Like I said earlier in the thread, it's just a nice day for us to celebrate each other. The most we get for each other is a small box of chocolates or a flower. Our birthdays are right around the corner (his is in March, mine is in April) so we save that money for the video games we get each other instead :joker:

I always joked with my friends that my ideal guy would show up on my doorstep with a video game instead of flowers. Well a few months into our relationship my fiance did just that :) I thought to myself: "this guy is a keeper!" and here we are engaged now.

Funny story though, we never got to spend our first valentine's day together. I wound up getting really sick just before we were going to go out, LOL. We wound up celebrating it the following week. :joker:

MiZTaCCen 01-24-2012 10:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sontaikle (Post 4186126)
It sounds like you have a great guy :)


I always joked with my friends that my ideal guy would show up on my doorstep with a video game instead of flowers. Well a few months into our relationship my fiance did just that :) I thought to myself: "this guy is a keeper!" and here we are engaged now.

:joker:

LOL I have to say that is awesome, and totally a guy worth keeping! I once had a guy buy me jewelery...I don't wear jewelery, I don't even have my ears pierced we hung out every day for three months while "dated" playing video games, and I was into photography, fitness, journaling etc... I even clearly stated I hate jewelery and I got that as a gift...:dizzy: We didn't last long after that. lol I would have even just enjoyed flowers (colourful ones, not roses) but instead I got a necklace...Maybe I'm just a *****, but he was an alcoholic anyways. :eek:


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