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Old 02-11-2011, 10:50 AM   #1  
one day at a time
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Default Having a terrible time getting started :(

So ive lost weight once before, about a year ago so i know that i can do it again. At the beginning of january i was thinking that it would be a piece of cake to lose the weight again because i had already done it once before and had it all figured out.
But thats not working out so well. I've lost barely any weight since then even though ive been going to the gym. I havent been eating super great, and maybe thats what i need to get in order, but i don't understand why i'm not losing weight going to the gym. It's how i lost weight last time.

on top of that, i have like no support. i have my skinny friends who say "oh ya, ill go to the gym with you" and then when it comes time to go, they bail and so every time i want to go to the gym i have to motivate myself to go alone, or not go at all.

i love my boyfriend very much, but hes always like "but i love your body. i dont want you to change it. you shouldnt go to the gym, you should stay home and cuddle with me and watch a movie" I know that i need to talk to him about being supportive, but he really doesn't understand my motivations for losing weight.
I mentioned needing to get into good shape so that i can wear my bikini again (that i bought last summer but can no longer fit into) and he starts going on about how i can wear my bikini with the body i have now and if anyone is mean to me he will beat them up (not serious on that last part of course). i was confused and i was like "i dont think anyone is going to make fun of me or be mean to me.... " and he asked me why i think i need to lose weight if its not cuz im afraid of people being mean to me.
It really made me realize that my weight loss is really for myself. but he doesn't understand that, and maybe won't be able to since its not something he's ever felt.

so ya, those are my current dilemmas that i needed to get out of my system.
Between my boyfriend, being a full time student, working to pay the bills, it feels like i should be losing weight but im not.
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Old 02-11-2011, 10:58 AM   #2  
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The key is your eating. You can lose weight by calorie restriction and not exercise, but you can't out exercise bad eating habits.

Find a calorie plan you can stick to, and don't stress about the gym.
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Old 02-11-2011, 11:09 AM   #3  
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One of the most difficult things you will ever have to learn is how to stand up for yourself. I think you are learning that now.

I think that a group support system like Weight Watchers's might be good for you. You will have something in common with everyone in the room because they are all there for the same reason and you can probably find some gym buddies as well.

That would be my "fix" for your situation. Hope it works out for you!
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Old 02-11-2011, 11:11 AM   #4  
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ME- I guess I'm one of the minority here, I can't lose weight by simply calorie restricting... I've tried. My body doesn't work like that. Now if I calorie restrict AND add exercise, even if it's only half an hour a day, I lose weight.

I need to recommit to myself too. That hour is mine... I just talked about this with my fiance' last night b/c he says the same thing yours does. He's been with me for the last 30 pounds of weight loss, so in perspective I am much smaller, and he doesn't understand why I still stress losing more. For me its a health issue (I have diabetes). We had a heart to heart last night and are both going to commit to some kind of activity daily, because I don't think living with me has benefited his waistline

Get active. Take the stairs. Park further from the grocery store. Walk to see people at work instead of calling.
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Old 02-11-2011, 11:11 AM   #5  
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I think your BF has the best of intentions, but it sure isn't helpful when you're trying to stay on plan!

As for your friends bailing on you, I've always taken the frame of mind that workout buddies are great, but so unreliable. So yes, you are sort of on your own in that capacity.

It's so frustrating when your plan doesn't seem to work anymore, but the lower your weight, the slower it goes. It took me 6 months to lose 10 pounds, which SUCKED because the first 70 melted off.

I'm about 8 lbs away from my goal weight and I've sort of resigned myself that it could take a very long time because that's how our bodies work. I've also adjusted my plan because I've found that what worked for a long time may just stop working, so it takes some tweaking.

I think you should stick with it. What does your eating plan look like? I changed things up by cutting sugar (even fruit) and that seemed to give my body the kick in the butt it needed. Maybe some minor adjustments will do the same for you? Keep it up! I know it's hard when you can't get results despite putting in a lot of effort!
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